Civilized expectations are not realized but subversively aspirational.

 

 

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The following, alas, is still only a proposal. No claims or promises are expressed or implied. 

 

  The CliqueBustersTM
   

Welcome to the most radical known anti-bullying webpage online!

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
“He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare,
And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere.”
 
Ali ibn Abi Talib, 4th caliph (602-661)
 
 
“In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends  —  Martin Luther King, Jr.
 
Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.”  — Thomas Jones
 
 
“A friend means well, even when he hurts you. But when an enemy genially claps his hand about your shoulder - watch out!”  — Proverbs 27:6  
 
 
“A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.”  — Adlai Ewing Stevenson
 

“Do you know that some people hate you because someone lied to them about you?”  — Clinton Baruch   

 
“If there were in the world today any large number of people who desired their own happiness more than they desired the unhappiness of others, we could have paradise in a few years.   — Bertrand Russell 
 
 

 

 

The star first follower or ally shall be the true leader

among co-founders teaching by example, showing others how to follow, demonstrating how to relate

A good friend knows all your stories. A best friend helped you create them.  Unknown  

 

 
Post to the for others to weigh in, oremail to: aaronagassi@comcast.netif it's private.
And not simply about bullying most generally, but perhaps actually also about CliqueBusters TM: in specific, please.

 

 

 

 

 

“All truth passes through three stages
First, it is ridiculed
Second, it is violently opposed
Third, It is accepted as being self evident

— Arthur Schopenhauer

 

In the words of Neil Gabler: “American society is a society in which individuals have learned to prize social skills that permit them, like actors, to assume whatever rôle the occasion demands and to "perform" their lives rather than just live them.” And forced cheerful willful positivity and interminably vapid small talk notwithstanding, a morbidly serious matter. Nothing could ever be less playful. Competent or incompetent, whether in true hardnosed practicality or in sheer aimless and empty actingout of mimesis, many all the same remain no less consumed with the burning question of how to perform as expected and to fit in: How best to placate The Great Faceless They, thereby to obtain the key to life.

And yet, given tautologically that social interaction occurs only between more than one entity, can there even be any such thing as individual social success? Because individual performance notwithstanding, the individual remains at the mercy of others, therefore ever fearful of rejection and exclusion. Perhaps instead, by whatever criteria, success of societies great or small, collectively, in better serving individual participants in society, might present a better measure in agenda of more emotionally secure and worthy a striving between people of good will, responsible adults, than in such immature unrelenting subtext, such harrowing intimidation of the individual. An endless dance of perpetual suspicion, justifiable paranoia and necessary hypocrisy, that quashes anything happy and genuine. And indeed any true social grace of creditable Menschlichkeit gaining élan and repute, actually by saving face for others who stumble, as do we all eventually, and not by any power play of entrapment and humiliation. Speaking whereof the latter:

Suppose that person a speaks to person b about person c. Person b then feels uncomfortable. Question: Who has made person b so uncomfortable? What is the cause of the discomfort experienced by person b, whatever circumstances as reported of person c, or the hurtful gossip of person a? It's a trick question. Strictly speaking, no one has made person b uncomfortable. The turn of phrase is imprecise. The discomfort of person b, is an experience arising in motivated response consistent with character, not via mechanistic causal necessity. Right or wrong, people first need to own their personal subjective reactions, especially as howsoever nuanced and subtle. And beware vendettas of emotional blackmail. Beware when ruffled feathers take precedence over deliberate tangible harm. For such is bullythink.

One size does not fit all. Different people have different comfort zones that with empathy and sensitivity, can be accommodated, without inflicting the most moribund and brutally repressive normatively uniform standardization upon everyone. To do so is not venerable tradition but malign contrivance, manipulative rationalization to disarm natural resistance in the face of coercion. Don't be memebots! In the immortal lyric of George Clinton: “Free your mind, and your ass will follow! Indeed, to quote a groundbreaking and renowned innovator and acknowledged authority on the subject, no less and none other than Nazi Reich Minister of Propaganda Joseph Goebbels: Propaganda becomes ineffective, the moment we become aware of it. Yes, straight from the proverbial killer horse's blood dripping maw. So, let's all just compare notes:

Somehow, scapegoats are always too dangerous and yet not dangerous enough. In propaganda, the persecuted are typically depicted as too dangerous to simply let be, and yet not dangerous enough to present any risk in the course of hostility against them. Such manifest contradiction ought to be a red flag, raising suspicion of propaganda dishonesty and inflammatory hate speech.

At least until moving on to whatever other mode of flagrant dishonesty, there often manifests a meme, a devious propaganda implication to whatever effect that the woes of the target of bullying, are not deliberate and purposeful, but somehow arise organically. From whence, however? Why somehow from whatever hamartia or fatal flaw of said target of bullying. And such is victim blaming so insidious and second nature, as to go unnoticed and unquestioned. And if the target of bullying does not understand whatever grudge held against them, then this is only clear demonstration that they are deficient and not properly socialized. And not any indication that at very least, slanderous abusers must be called upon explain themselves, or afford their targets of bullying any sort of fair hearing. As if! True enough however, that the dissident and ostracized are seldom properly socialized to whatever the self-serving twisted malignant values and impossible expectations of their persecutors. 

When confronted with the golden rule: Is this how you would wish to be treated? Bullies can either go deeper into evasion, rationalization, delusion and denial, even taken aback, or else they might just laugh and gloat openly. Most likely they might simply run away and refuse to talk. There can be no reasoning with compulsive serial bullies and evil doers, no matter the manifest and considerable harm and danger from their incessant and unrelenting bullying and evil doing. There is clear consensus in the study of bullying, to the effect that bullying unpunished like a dry run for ever greater tyrant to come, not only persists but ever escalates.

As Carl von Clausewitz warns us, “The aggressor is always peace-loving; he would prefer to [bully] unopposed.” They are the enemy, after all! And, as grand as it may be to befriend one's enemy, one's enemy will only be befriended should they so decide. Enemies can only really become friends after first establishing peace. In the meantime, the enemy is no friend, and it is grave folly to behave otherwise and to surrender all initiative. As Masha Gessen said on CNBC, Whenever you have a good faith actor on one side, and a bad faith actor on the other, the bad faith actor is in a position to win. After all: “A friend means well, even when he hurts you. But when an enemy puts his hand round your shoulder - watch out!”  — Proverbs 27:6 Indeed, Sun Tzu observes that if the enemy seeks peace or opens negotiations unexpectedly, they are actually scheming, and that apology and humility likely just a delaying ploy playing for time and respite to regroup. Moreover: "To fail to take the battle to the enemy when your back is to the wall is to perish."
 
CliqueBusters, this very text before you gentle reader, without false modesty the most radical known anti-bullying webpage online, right here on FoolQuest.com, once upon a time did garner meticulous attention and effusive praise, indeed even for evocative writing style, from some handful of readers who had so greatly suffered bullying, and yet all who nevertheless adamantly refused even to acknowledge, much less entertain, the CliqueBusters agenda as proposed, of nonviolent innovation so (subversive of hierarchy and therefore heteronymously) taboo, in actively thwarting bullies. And similarly even in embrace of shared values. For in the words of Benjamin Disraeli: Action may not always bring happiness; but there is no happiness without action.
 
 
Infiltration and resistance made simple 
Conspire with me

Unmet friend: Why are you reading this page? Does it interest you? Then either we have found one another and I am just about to hear from you, or else for some reason you hesitate. Whatever your misgivings or mistrust, that will be the first thing that needs to be discussed. For the danger is always very real. If you think that anybody has anything to hold over your head, there has to be someone to consult and strategize. There's me.

Gentle reader: Either you already know and understand full well the exploitative and abusive malevolence and mendacity of serial bullying, or else you can scarcely imagine! How can people perfectly well aware of the most blatantly violent crime, then become so incredulous as regards the most devious and malignant serial bullying? We are all aware of discrimination. In Ireland, discrimination is legally defined as bullying by class. But anywhere else in the world, charges of discrimination depend upon recognition of specific discriminated groups. And so, serial bullying as such, largely remains undeterred. How then shall I overcome such nigh cult level harassment, utter calumny and ostracism? I have no voice by which to and speak truth to abuse of power, and the information vacuum thereby produced, is filled with the most fantastic slander. I have faded away in a blizzard of lies! I have exhausted every recourse. Why will no one help me? It's no wonder: People are rightly afraid! Anyone seen befriending me also risk summary persecution. But barring compulsive approval seeking, we need not be seen. Only those one trusts actually need know.  

So shunned and excluded, what then might I possibly have to offer? In particular, who am I, of all people, to proffer social advice? 'The Devil's Dictionary’’ by Ambrose Bierce famously presents the quotable definition: "FRIENDLESS, adj. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense." For innovative solution finding, Look for the Solution within the Problem:

To quote from ‘The Devil's Dictionary’ by Ambrose Bierce: Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.” And thus bereft of all standing as I remain, any of my assertions and proposals, must each and all stand or fall upon whatever its own merits. In the words of Mark R. J. Lavoie: “Life dies inside a person when there are no others willing to befriend him. Am I your unmet friend? I might not have what you are looking for, gentle reader, but dare we seek for it together? Or are we already thinking about, much less doing, however anything at all more important? Do tell! For in the words of Wolfgang Goethe “Things that matter most must never be at the mercy of things that matter least.”
Yes: You too can become popular by hating me! It's only human nature: Hate garners the most attention. But if they don't want you to talk with me, then what don't they want me to tell you? Let's compare notes: Because I am such a pariah, so unpopular, indeed so widely despised, association with me may bring detriment to social standing. Instead, when swimming with the sharks, become one, or pander to their vanity by pretending to. For at least the appearance of co-validation in hostility towards me, may better garner enhanced ones own popularity, but only if one does not seem too desperate and egotistical in the effort. Never villainously brag for oneself, but only join in the praise of whatever evil collectively celebrated. After all, the entire sycophantic purpose of the exercise remains unit cohesion and co-validation of the Borg collective. Be receptive and learn the truth. Let the others brag and implicate themselves. Wear a wire! And beware, bullies ever eager to enlist others as cronies in bullying and defamation, will just as readily turn on them as well, soon enough. Untrustworthy bullies are never real friends. And ultimately, the only effective protection from vulnerable isolation before predators, remains good friendship. But scarce friendship is what the grifter simulates in false friendship only building up to betrayal. And much as any such predators as grifters and bullies thrive, divide and conquer, by first socially isolating their prey, they typically also remain ever socially skilled at networking and infiltration intro social circles of trust.

Whether indeed in your heart of hearts you truly do revile me or not, remains, however, strategically moot. Indeed an effective demagogue should never get hooked on their own bile. Better to lie convincingly to others than unconvincingly to yourself. Remember, if cliquish bullies approach you peer pressuring any act of betrayal against a target of bullying, then unless you demonstrate zeal in continued bullying, or just pretend to, eventually the bullies will lose patience and turn on you. You won't need the greatest method acting to satisfy your new best buds and play upon their insatiable cravings for endless co-validation, normalizing deviance. Just humor them, continually. "Stroke" and flatter them endlessly. Pretend to be swayed by them against me (or whomever other target(s) of bullying) Only a superficial embrace of the hate faith is required. Cagy as they are when called to account, even the best and brightest of them will become fawning self incriminating useful idiots when effusively pandered to! And it won't truly be necessary to actually lash out at me  (or whomever other target(s) of bullying) Just be agreeable when they calumniate me, or throw a party and then ostentatiously uninvite and ostracize me! Or just pretend that you have. Hate me hipster ironically! They'll never catch on, even while everyone else is struggling not to laugh. Thereby, by such sly mockery, will be propagated a damaging meme of scorn and ridicule against bullying cliques. Yes, bullies ever remain actually that self-important and desperately eager for co-validation! And then you'll be in like Flynn!

But good and evil ever remain ones own choice: You can select your alignment to use your new power selfishly, altruistically or malevolently outright. Yes, you too can benefit from becoming a well-connected and manipulatively venomous sycophant. Or you too, can become a conniving bully, indulging deep-seated and poorly sublimated sexual Sadism, generally harassing, intimidating, gas lighting, organized orchestrated harassment, psychological warfare, exploiting and abusing vulnerable targets of bullying, by all manner of depraved fair game tactics of skullduggery and damaging dirty tricks and worse, all with utter impunity. Your new cronies will protect and mentor you in finding vulnerable targets in a prey rich social environment, and in every imaginable sly self-serving hypocrisy of covert relational hostility and unrelenting psychological warfare all harmfully intended to damage the social standing and undermine the interpersonal relationships, of targets of bullying, through the use of purposeful interpersonal manipulation or social exclusion. Why do people believe in all manner of hate crime as a matter of course, doubt the prevalence and severity of serial bullying? 

And then comes the Affinity Scam: Bullies become popular, accepted and trusted, in order then to ride on the legitimacy of others and network, then also to exploit and abuse connected individuals in good social standing as well as scapegoated targets of bullying. And best of all, you can then blow off the mark: Popular folks will all be too ashamed and cognitively dissonant to complain. They won't want to come off as such chumps! This is because of the deplorable and predatory ethos, ideology and perception that 'Winners Take All; Targets of Bullying Are Luzers.' Hence no less time honored and well rewarded ever remains ubiqutous hypocritical and sexualy predatory tradition of cockblocking, by which together to corral and exploit all the the desirable women for yourselves, "for their own good," so that other men must curry your approval in order to gain access. 

Or instead, if the above fails to entice, but only enflames redeeming Existential disgust, then instead let me explain to you how to infiltrate, expose, ridicule, subvert and resist bullying cliques, and show others how. You can even stay in character, cosplaying your favorite subversive antihero! Sun Tzu said: "All is war." And: "War is deception." And what a joy to deceive the deceivers! Do like guerilla journalist Lauren Windsor! “It’s exhilarating being in the arena in a battle of wits.” Remember: Pretend like-mindedness. Carry on just like they do, but be different in only one crucial respect: Never brag, wear a wire, feign enthusiastic approval, thereby to coax others to brag, in such eager self-incrimination. Indeed, join in their effusive praise of whatever repugnantly sanctioned collective abuse and persecution. Discover whatever they so fear, and then work to bring it about. Consensus of hate is truly stupefying. And false agreeability with hate is a time honored tactic in order to infiltrate hate groups, climbing the ranks quickly in order to expose and destroy from within.

Or simply do what so many other do, and stay well clear of bullies, escaping their notice entirely. But perhaps a better strategy might be to identify the bullies, power players and hangers on alike, and whenever you come in contact, humor them, denounce me or any other target of bullying they may denigrate and victimize. Praise whatever their most flagrant abuse against me of any other target of bullying as effusively as possible, before slipping away as quickly and stealthily as possible. And thereby will be covertly propagated a damaging meme of contempt, shunning and exclusion against bullying cliques, returning dishonesty for dishonesty, secret anger thus purging all cowardly cognitive dissonance.

It's not a question of being paranoid, but of remaining vigilantly paranoid enough!  Beware: Even without overt dissidence or at all questioning, simply failing to conform by adequately hating the target of bullying, me or whomever else, may be sufficient grounds for sudden harassment and exclusion, even if they cover with whatever bewilderingly trivial excuses. And when it comes to serial false accusation and bullying, virtually anyone at all can get the ball rolling entirely unquestioned and unaccountable. Like any rumor or malicious gossip, no one remembers or very much even cares where it started. Bullies do not care about truth, any more than any other moral principle. For bullying, ostracism, protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse, are simply the way of the world unless functional and consistent social controls upon such abusive conduct are in place as part of the culture. After all, bullying remains motivated from membership in the dark side of terror management strategy and failed confrontation with Existential Absurdity. But only given autonomy and democracy, the very same prevailing and abiding mortal terror instead can motivate compassion, morality and friendship.

Alas that pedestrian truth cannot compete against sensationalistic slander in terms of sheer mindless lulz. And yet you might just find the real me more interesting than the one dimensional fabricated caricature. Think for yourselves! If you're not supposed to talk to me, then just what am I not supposed to tell you? Don't be a memebot! Think for yourself. The truth is long overdue. Let's all just compare notes:
 
What do such predatory borderline criminal organized bullies and social gatekeepers fear most, and how can that be brought about? Answer, they dread exposure and accountability, bringing the loss of their influence over the interaction of others at their social functions and within their extended social circles. And that can come about by the cultivation of any confidential, inclusive, reliable, transparent, functional and friendly social back channel. It can come about by any healthy skepticism towards their toxic narrative.
 
The designation of a target of bullying, such as yours truly, effectively creates a buffer for all others from falling into last place, socially. But what is the actual result? No chain can be stronger than its weakest link, the opportune target of bullying. Bullies are not our friends. Help stamp out bullying! No one can be safe until I am. Ironically, it is everyone else who lives in greater fear and intimidation. Bullying unpunished persists. And what happens when the buffer is removed and the bottom drops out? Consistently, one way or another, when bullies become successful in driving out any target of bullying, they are not at all appeased. Rather bullies finding no moral boundaries set before them, and welling up not with any gratitude or appreciation but only with somewhat justifiable contempt for precisely such intimidated craven enablement and immunity, therefore becoming excited and emboldened, will then only escalate ever more and more, impacting everyone. More individuals are targeted for bullying and social exclusion. Bullies organize to intimidate the community so that everyone except those hypocritical privileged and protected cronies will know that they are being watched. Therefore, soon enough, there is no safety but only greater danger, in allowing anyone else to be scapegoated. After one fails to speak up for the persecuted, then who will be left to speak up for anyone else? Are you afraid? You should be!
 
But what is it that makes those bullies all so crazy jealous over the top actingout out and controlling? Just what can it be that has actually wedged their panties up in such a bunch? And wouldn't it be interesting to watch, if ever their bubble was suddenly burst? That will take some doing, though. Then again, consider all that the effort of Big Lie repetition that bullies typically have so long invested in their entire toxic propaganda narratives. What if it all suddenly dissipated in all of its insubstantial mendacity? What if it where all quite spectacularly undermined and crashed like unto multiple iterations of blindly copied and pasted code errors? Indeed, if perchance you are attractive and female, therefore you are in demand and influential so that the counterpropaganda thrust becomes, as it where, a straightforward proposition: 
 

Hi, I hear that you're a big slut! Awesome, me too!

     Don't fuck me over, just fuck me: Fuck me like you mean it, and then publish a rave review! 
... for such ever remains the most subversively distinct and persuasive endorsement or: social "proof" (informational social influence) ...       
 
I an calumniated. I need someone to show me that I am not so worthless and vile as those slanderous bullies make me out to me! I mean, simply in order to subvert and undermine that scurrilous propaganda narrative of theirs, their portrayal of yours truly as some sort of undesirable! Just to thwart those loony mendacious and conniving hypocritical sexualy predatory cockblockers! Yes, it is all truly just so crass. So lets be crass and vulgar together! It's better than all being pitted against one another and living in fear.
 
In conformity or in subversion alike, to quote James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” Important close human relationship and particularly friendship let lone anything more than friendship, arises entirely as a byproduct of optimal reciprocal engagement in purposeful interaction and/or substantive communication, and never otherwise. And no one else need approve!
 
Let me manspliain it to you, darlings: Are you the master of your own social destiny? Or are you the pawn of another's networking machinations? Are we strangers by your own preference or by whatever happenstance, or are we apart by the devious design of others? Leave us admit the ugly truth that it happens all the time. After all, you should be just a little curious about me, simply in the light of some of those astonishing and bizarre hysterical displays of jealousy, to which any of those bullies that target me have been wont. Can it be that all ceaseless denigration not withstanding, we targets of bullying and defamation have anything going for us that bullies so resent? See for yourself: Reach out to befriend the excluded. 
 
Yes indeed, we do both enjoy sex: See how much we already have in common! However, should for whatever reason, sex with me might simply be too much of an imposition, then no matter, no need for awkwardness, I shall not take it amiss, I promise. After all, there are, as we are so often told, actually so many other things to do and talk about. At the very least, just set your browser to FoolQuest.com and we can all engage in deep and profound Platonic exchange, an orgy of the intellect! It's all good. And it makes the bad guys amusingly nervous. Try it and see. Don't be nervous. Online, you won't need to give away your identity. You can be sure that those craven and cowardly malignant cyberbullies, trolls and flamers don't identify themselves!
 
My point is that first we must admit to ourselves the deviousness of the coercion and manipulation that we all routinely endure, especially when it comes to matters of sexuality. As is long well understood, sexual liberation is no mere additional detail, however consistent, but psychologically and sociologically crucial in the overthrow of all other oppression. We've all heard this before. Indeed, in the celebrated lyric of George Clinton: "Free your ass and your mind will follow!" To reiterate, sex remains simplest and straight to the point. Why are hate speech, slander and malicious gossip typically so weird, dangerous and prudishly sex obsessed? Because terrifying slut shaming and intimidation repressing and controlling individual sexuality has always been at the very crux of oppression, petty or vast, propagating among the oppressed. And this effects everyone. It's not just the persecution of deviant minorities. We all come to regret humiliated submission to peer pressure from precisely those we quite rightly hold in greatest contempt, those who exist to demean their fellow human beings and take advantage. We simmer in impotent rage. And then we yearn to strike back in poetic justice, somehow, or just to be free of them. And together, this can be accomplished.
 
"If you prick us, do we not bleed?" S. O. S. Be a mensch: Help me, please! I have been targeted for ever escalating and orchestrated serial bullying, severe ostracism, exclusion and isolation, just bordering upon levels of actual cult harassment. And now I am defeated and isolated. I've tried everything. There is nothing I can do. The point is, I need you to defy convention and peer pressure to be my assertive big slut, by intentionally reaching out to befriend and defend me. Any such opportunity coming to light to befriend targets of bullying, for whatever it may be worth to you, depends upon what you want and what you'll do. Because, clearly, it won't just happen for us all by itself, propinquitously. And that is the very definition of responsibility under autonomy. So, honestly, how does that make you feel? Alas that in most any situation, so much of what anyone may rationalize and imagine as chance propinquity, is all too often no more than the conniving manufactured situational product of social circles acting as social filters, manipulative others remaining in control, exploitation however subtle or blatant. Social support, networking and connection with no other agenda save for individually perceived benefit, all predicated upon true friendship unconditionally, is rare, precious, exceptional and anathema to bullying.
 
The Public Relations hypothesis of popularity judo: Turning the force of unpopularity against itself... If you will stick up for me, and if by associating with me you can include me socially and help make even the likes of me at all more popular, then that would demonstrate the superpower to do as much for just about anyone else! Therefore you will become eagerly sought after, because others will readily come to believe that association with you likewise stands to raise their own social standing. But the strategy risky. 
 
Unmet friend: I know full well that I am doomed to disappoint in a million and one little ways, for such is the nebbish human condition and it can't be helped. But if only if ever the worst dysfunction and covert hostility could be ruled out, exploitation, abuse, dishonesty and violence, then perhaps what remains in outreach to one another can be negotiated as acceptable opportunity cost amid the vagaries of interpersonal compatibility. Friends accept us. In the words of Edgar Allen Poe: "Believe nothing you hear, and only half of that you see." Slanderous malicious gossip will ever be crafted so as to raise darkest trepidation of the very worst, that needn't convince but only inspire hesitation. Social exclusion denies all voice to the target of bullying. An information vacuum is created to be filled with the most flagrant and incredible propaganda lies. All  such mendacity can be safely disregarded only by due consideration the malignant source. Alas however, by that same token, there remains the clear and present danger of third party bullying. And it is wise to be afraid and cautious, yet not to be intimidated. For associating with me at all will surely garner the controlling disapproval of my dangerous enemies. So if we ever establish contact, we can always exercise the option of wisely remaining discrete, our secret, to be shared exactly as you may see fit, only among those who have well earned your trust, as we draw our plans to move against the evil doers who present such clear and present danger to all.
 
 
PS. Yes, it's all true: Boastful villains really are compelled to reveal their evil plans! And they will swear blue in the face to high Heaven above, that it is all for the selfless greater good of public service. 'My thoughts on the Readercon sexual harassment debacle' is a perfectly toxic online post defending, normalizing and thereby disclosing! only an instance of the escalating stages of hostility, even stalking and Sexual Harassment that I have endured, ending in pervasive ostracism and calumny. For all virulent and damaging slanderous malicious gossip, mendacious hate speech and shaming, it's all nothing but name calling and appeal to consensus. When liars justify themselves, they are probably still lying, and justifications for evildoing often come only in terms of more fundamental evildoing ideology. To the best of my knowledge, no coherent grievance has ever been presented against me quite simply because there is none. The entire bizarre paranoid experience of the incident which they actually staged before me, and all the interminable bizarre covert harassment and gaslighting leading up thereto, only follows a nigh cult level fair game harassment protocol from the Boskone and ARISIA conventions that I eventually learned had been so charmingly designated: Operation AA. Bear in mind that regardless of craven promises implied or expressed, that no one else would ever suffer such exclusion and abuse as inflicted upon me, the truth is that whenever bullies succeed in driving off their target of bullying, far from being placated, bullies are invigorated and emboldened to escalation that will intimidate and oppress entire communities. As the saying goes, give them an inch and they will take a mile. Such craven and conical tolerance of evil is willfully naive, and will be blithely accepted as endorsement from conspiracy of silence.
My definition of a free society is a society where it is safe to be unpopular. Where it’s safe to say what’s on your mind, especially when everyone disagrees. Where it’s safe to believe what you believe, especially when everyone else’s beliefs stand elsewhere. Where it’s safe to swim against the current and be perfectly safe from the other fish.
— Adlai Ewing Stevenson II
In a free society, social risk taking is encouraged by lowering the stakes, and never raising beyond all sane proportion, the stakes of every imagined slight and collected grudge, no matter the cache of shame and outrage, be that of witch hunting, Commie baiting or whatever latest strain of playground cooties. A free society, in the embrace of those values of civility and tolerance, is one wherein the rationalization and normalization of bullying, witch hunts and kangaroo court, by whatever hysteria, gains no traction; so that shunning, mobbing, and cockblocking will all be scorned as the very height of shocking  anathema for utter intolerant incivility, and even sheer personality conflict and simple dislike for whatever reason or none at all, exactly as most blatantly but inarticulately expressed in name calling, will all be reliably mitigated and restrained by some functional minimum of decent adult expectations and coping. Because in case of personality conflict and simple dislike, to which we are all entitled after all, the adult expectation is for the parties to even cooperate, simply to minimize their dealings, contact and friction as much as will be practical, without social exclusion, predatory scheming, double-dealing or actingout.
 
Nothing will improve by half measures of conviction. It should be crystal clear by now that no one else will be safe in Fandom until I am. But if perhaps by whatever happenstance, gentle reader, you have never even heard of me, let alone those malignant borderline criminal bullies that I have contended with, and indeed want no truck with belligerently awkward Sci-Fi fanboys, then take all the above by way of illustrative case study. Because there are always bullies endangering your own communities, and lonely isolated targets of bullying, good people in jeopardy. And you can be our secret agent superhero!
 
 
 
If and no sooner than do bullies successfully drive out their targets of bullying, then the bullies, emboldened by the malleability of whatever authorities, and at a lose end without their former target of bullying to torment with impunity, far from remaining mollified or placarded,  then only the more brazen, bullies then not only quickly designate new targets of bullying, but escalate not only the severity of abuse but also the very stakes for everyone. Indeed, cronyistic cliques of bullies with impunity, are intensely attractive to ever more criminal and psychiatrically disturbed destructive elements. For as Winston Churchill well admonished: appeasers never prosper. And mollifying bullies with scapegoats, is like calming sharks by chumming the waters.

A serious response to bullying must then recognize the inadequacy of goody two-shoes social skills remediation directed towards reducing whatever howsoever premised supposed elicitation of bullying on the part of targets of bullying. An effective and just response to bullying must uphold individual rights, differences, limitations, nuance, eccentricities and foibles, let alone talents as may inspire envy and virtues that accrue resentment from serial bullies and their apologists, while deploring all that amounts to treatment of
dissidence, especially all Behavioral Modification no matter how "Cognitive," for targets bullying, as willful malpractice, being a'priori abrogation of Freud's injunction against suggestion that is the core Medical Ethic of Psychotherapy. The proper focus instead should be upon stopping the bullies from bullying and pressing the salient question: Just what will that take, really?

A serious, effective and just response to bullying must acknowledge as has become expert consensus in the anti-bullying community, that bullying unexposed and unpunished persists, and therefore recognize that appropriate social aptitudes under conditions of hostility, one way or another may well include howsoever deterrent
adversative memetics of credible threat in order ever to quell bullying. We must organize, radicalize and frame action  agendas. Targets of bullying must no longer be pressed to become passive little angels and endure ongoing abuse simply in order to pander to craven public squeamishness with rising conflict. Loneliness has been discovered to propagate within social networks, when hurt and frustration manifest in malaise of reclusive withdrawal sour disposition that progressively renders others exposed similarly emotionally depressed, disagreeable and socially withdrawn. And of course, unresponsive or outright hostile social environments of ostracism and bullying are even more devastating both upon targeted individuals and what social networks remain accessible to them. Targets of bullying need to recover coherent organized coping ability, hope, and yes: the dignity that only inhabits aggression. We must fight back! Serious discourse in framing appropriate rules of engagement against bullying must reject and deplore all kneejerk scapegoating and victim blaming in craven characterization of resistance and conflict as merely vengeful on the part of targets of bullying. No, we must not merely sink to their level: This is war, and the primary overriding objective of war is nothing less than to destroy the enemy's ability to do harm. All else may remain open to discourse.
 
Nihilists have taken determinism to imply that individual human beings have no actual free will and even therefore cannot justly be held morally responsible for their actions at all. This is called: Nihilistic value destruction. And giving even freedom itself, along with Individualism, ego, selfish self centered self interest, actually such a bad name, there have always persisted whatever liberties taken, the callous amoral sheer impunity, of whatever entrenched privilege, unconstrained to oppress and exploit all others without compassion or regard: Freedom of action without regard of impact, harm and violation of the rights of others. And those who enjoy precisely such freedom of evil, together with their malignant apologists, defend status quo with every main and might. In short, bullies of whatever stripe, are convinced that they are within their rights and ownership of power, ever actingout.
 
Whereas, for the oppressed, marginalized and isolated, there often remains merely an entirely abstract freedom of speech and of protest with no voice, expression that goes unheard in deprivation and isolation. Many therefore have given up on the very notion of freedom and autonomy, cynically and desperately embracing instead the empty promises of heteronomy and surrender to status quo. But ever crucial to real practical freedom, and not just in the abstract, remains achievement of individual security and stability, meaning, in context of social life, an absence of, or any effective counter to, considerable threat and constraint otherwise placed by predatory serial bullying and exploitation.

 

Befriending targets of bullying:
Social "Proof" (informational social influence) and Code Pink tactics countering dangerous bystander apathy

First of all, even at whatever risk of digression into semantics becoming nerdy and pedantic, there is a reason why herein the very word 'proof,' even as in the expression "social proof," remains always surrounded by such ominous scare-quotes.: "When in Rome, do as the Romans do."-so goes the saying... Technically however, as a point of applicable semantics, since proof is of validity, of internal consistency of logical prepositions so that they do not contradict themselves to begin with, and never of truth which is correspondence to reality, remaining distinctly an Empirical question, Therefore shouldn't informational social influence ought to be called not: "social proof," but instead perhaps: "social corroboration?" Indeed, being howsoever likened unto corroboration, informational social influence, being: support by whatever kind of evidence, information or even authority, even thereby increasing at least perceived certainty, at least seems continually additive, can likewise still never become conclusive and permanent. There can be no absolute proof.  Nor can there be any such thing as disproof, only refutation, being: demonstration of the falsehood or unavailability of an hypothesis. Hence also instead of any whatever social "disproof," social refutation, however that might work out. Not to digress.

Be More Than an apathetic bystander: Code Pink is the simplest and least aggressive counter to bullying, and yet highly effective. Social "proof" eases hesitation and worry, in order help overcome shock, surprise, timid confusion and hesitation. And it can't begin too soon. According to Robert Cialdini, who details the principle of social "proof" in great depth in his ‘Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion’ “we view a behavior as more correct in a given situation to the degree that we see others performing it. So often in situations where we are uncertain about what to do, we would assume that the people around us (experts, celebrities, friends, etc.) have more knowledge about what’s going on and what should be done.”

Thus, to better protect the targets of bullying, it will be important for a Clique Busters cell to assimilate the targets of bullying into their peer group, and involve themselves in the day to day lives of said targets of bullying in order to better watch out for them. To raise consciousness, close ranks, and help build such group support as will leave bullies stymied, even ones in authority. Even to adapt such solidarity mimesis as nurses on call facing abusive supervisors have categorized under "Code Pink". (Disambiguation: Not to be confused with the better known protest group nor with hospital child abduction alerts.)

    -- ever hear of a "Code Pink"? If a doctor starts to berate a nurse, the other nurses within hearing step forward beside the nurse under attack, and stare SILENTLY at the doctor until he/she realizes that the appropriate way to discuss the patient care in question would be to have pulled the nurse aside to a private area and speak as professionals. Incredibly effective, and gives the nurses a way that is not direct or aggressive to modify the oft-times stressed-out MD behavior. After a couple of times, that behavior is not repeated again on THAT floor!

Again, the reason that bullies retreat at the sight of a target having friends, is because bullies prefer a victim they can isolate. But never a member in good standing accepted by their own immediate social circle likely sticking up for their friend.

Negativity  Friendships: To quote Alice Roosevelt Longworth: “If you can’t say something good about someone, sit right here by me.” It is only human nature that hate garners the most attention, and we enjoy meeting others who dislike the same things about others as we ourselves do. But all things in moderation. For in bullying that natural impulse runs amok in the most malicious gossip, proselytizing and  actingout.
 
  • In the alternative, be a mensch, a leader and not a follower. For Menschlichkeit or creditable and trustworthy humaneness and integrity, is the art of being a mensch, upfront, honest, autonomous, responsible and accountable, yet gentle, with benevolence, empathy, sympathy and even friendship. And it may obtain tactically as a special case from principles of instrumentality, expedience and service, that in order to gain popularity, desperate sycophantic social climbing as a follower among the popular and prominent, so often exploitative and abusive, may often result only in loosing all respect and self esteem. Instead. just the opposite, demonstration of leadership by leverage of whatever personal social standing if any, indeed by giving of ones heart, spending time and attention, showing interest and support for all too see, thus it may be possible by association, to confer greater popularity upon others. And anyone who can do that will always remain in high demand, ever increasing their own popularity from demonstration of precisely that ability to advance others. Everyone will want to stay in the good graces of such a one. Thence from that secure position, the most unpopular friends can be an asset rather than a liability. Rather than simply imperiling ones own standing, befriending even the most unpopular targets of bullying then presents the greatest challenge and opportunity to more spectacularly demonstrate your Menschlichkeit leadership superpower only for good.
  • The trust of the target of bullying must be well and fully earned by trustworthy unconditional opposition to bullying, before any even however most minimal added restraint or cooperation be requested from the target of bullying, and even then, most humbly and apologetically, under the circumstances of bullying which, after all, ought make responsible authorities blush. -and in so blushing, so to speak, and as publicly as possible, thereby already providing social "proof" in order to model subsequent imitation and thereby public disgrace for the bullies, indeed by demonstrating how to regard said bullies with shame and even contempt. Bullies, being as they are, though so lacking in empathy, over socialized and susceptible to peer disapproval that can be staged and manufactured, will therefore be cowed and routed. It is hypothesized herein that with repeated and consistent application, this may often turn out to be the most effective and least destructive detent against pandemic serial bullying. But such tactics will require individual conscience towards responsible and intentional organization, as all to often alas, in any event of such functional social response failing to arise organically. Beware socialization, that which none dare call: indoctrination or brainwash. We all need to teach and to be tought what is moral and helpful in overcoming evil. Or else cliquish serial bullies will do it for us. Because serial bullying with impunity serves as it's own ongoing social "proof."

    Appropriate social "proof" (informational social influence) may be crucial in overcoming perilous obscurity and social "invisibility," let alone bullying outright.

    In the movie 'Ladyhawke', the curse will only be lifted when that jilted and jealous malignant cockblocker the Bishop of Aquila is thwarted and crushed by the very sight of the harried outlaw fugitive Etienne and his beloved Isabeau finally reunited with the help of their friend, the initially somewhat mousy but redoubtable Philippe. This is metaphor signifying how deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility and social exclusion effectively manufactures poisonous social "disproof" if you will, in palpable denunciation of the target's luzer status of undesirability, and serving also as an effective obstacle, indeed much like unto some sort of curse, the best Transactional Antithesis being any social "proof" to the contrary, that may still howsoever nevertheless be attained in rising resistance to oppressive coercion and manipulation. For one is all too frequently judged by ones popularity and the company one keeps. For the awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Moreover, serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail.

    Indeed, meekly and most publicly apologizing to targets of bullying, in the most effusively wretched mortification of embarrassment at the most flagrant serial bullying, may even be far more devastating thereto even than following up by actually scolding the bullies however scathingly, soundly and publicly. Conspicuous effusive mortified apology to the target of bullying, will have the effect of disgracing the bully even without paying bullies any direct attention, but instead publicly and even so theatrically shunning them. There will be nothing the bully can do or say that won't simply deepen the disgrace. And as a matter of optimal casting for maximal devastation and humiliation of bullies and their vicious cliques, the apologetic spokespersons might be any sort of authority figures and minor celebrities, figures of pathos such as the elderly and infirm, or however passably attractive women. It is imperative to monitor the operations of bullies, mantain rapid response, conduct ongoing covert videography, document and publicize their disgrace in countergossip, continually, even setting up the bullies for humiliating exposure via the orchestration of sting operations making them fools all the more. 

    In the words of Abba Eban: Consensus is what many people say in chorus but do not believe as individuals”. "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." -so goes the saying. What may be in their hearts, would be quite another matter. Consensus functions as social "proof", even in support of any direction taken, even howsoever arbitrary and even unsound. Indeed, for prime example, testimonials, even wielded as peer pressure, are anecdotal evidence and therefore in actuality among the most worthless and completely unreliable known to science.

  • Consensus manipulation
  • "When in Rome, do as the Romans do." -so goes the saying. A big shot is recognizable by their entourage. Even the brief glowing introduction and credentials provided by a secretary transferring a phone call, is quite effective to inspire customer trust. Although, people do give more credence to information corroborated by multiple sources, especially in the form of repeatedly observable behavior, even against all better judgment, as with repetitive malicious gossip, however unlikely and unsupported. Many hope that a group to hang out with will serve to make each individual member appear more popular and gregarious. Perceived similarity and hopes of inclusion, intensify social "proof", as do conformity and uncertainty. People cue up, use shopping carts, and conform to various table manners ands more, all by following suit from observable behavior of others in public. "In general, most men fail to meet women [because] they travel in packs but go on the hunt solo" or, to employ the Naturalists jargon, they function, and badly, as "sneaky rutters", according to 'CubanJoe's Rules of Engagement', apparently a more condensed version of 'The Pickup Mission'. Indeed, not unlike the first shills rising to their feet from the audience of a faith healer to help get the proverbial ball metaphorically rolling, rent-a-friends, wingmen and yes: wingwomen, are all available for hire, in order to provide social "proof" and to make introductions: "making you look attractive fun mysterious interesting and scarce (just what Women look for in a real man)."

  • Swiftian ironies of the human herd 
  • It is often recommended rather than simply meeting with a prospect in order to make their acquaintance, better to research and know them before your meet them, much less trust them. However this may tend to require prior networking with acquaintances in common. What is exchanged, then, is the social Persecutor-Rescuer of publicity and reputation, of sheer gossip. And in the words of Elbert Hubbard: “Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.” Indeed, if only enemies of said individual are at all and the only acquaintance in common, then closer acquaintance by anyone else with said individual, is never much encouraged by such social "disproof". -Except, as often, by merciless predators in search of a ready vulnerable socially isolated target. And with little more qualm as to equivocally biting whatever metaphorical hands that proverbially feed them, just such predators readily gaining acceptance into cliques by joining in against their targets of bullying, by such infiltration then also gain ready access, trust and good standing, into the wider community in order to network new marks for classic affinity csamming as targeting any group of people taking pride in whatever perceived shared identity or characteristics.

    But true CliqueBusters in visibly befriending a target of bullying, in solidarity instead of conditionality, even going so far as the Code Pink maneuver, can provide assertive social Persecutor-Rescuer effectively intimidating cowardly bullies. In the words of Mark R. J. Lavoie: “Life dies inside a person when there are no others willing to befriend him.” Protecting the weakest link helps safeguard the entire community from ever more dangerously pathological or criminal predators otherwise attracted into bullying cliques and gaining ready wider access into wider communities, also providing a the social "proof" of good example instead of leaving only such bad ones as bullying and bystander apathy which results from cowardice or else, to be fair, from sheer uniformed confusion, resultant from mass deception, manipulation and surprise, as what may be deemed the null or default social "proof", given also lack of initiative leadership social Persecutor-Rescuer in any other direction or dissemination of information and opinion, thereby leaving people in the dark. Thus, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. But passivity and confusion often accommodate victim blaming and scapegoating

    Bullies generally prefer to target the socially isolated who are without defenders. Therefore, the simplest and most innocuous thing that can be done by any individual against bullying, is to immediately befriend the target of bullying should one ever, whenever, come upon a bully or bullies bullying. The bully or bullies will then slink away in retreat. But be sure to shame them before they can escape, and then to spread word thereof.

    To be sociable and thwart bullies, always stay alert for opportunity to include others, especially those who seem left out and neglected, socially, in activities and conversation.

    Get full names and contact information of targets of bullying in order to reach out in secret, to a target of bullying. Then follow up. Conspire with targets of bullying, against the bullies. Include targets of bullying in your social networking.

    “A friend is a person who says nice things about you behind your back.”

    Social "proof" makes any other possible decision seem somehow outside the norm, and then peer pressure presses any dissident thought beyond the pale. But the thing about norms is there are always differing and competing norms from which to select and then to evoke. To reiterate, meekly and most publicly apologizing in wretched mortification for flagrant bullies may even be far more devastating thereto even than actually scolding the bullies however scathingly and soundly, much less actually accommodation or scapegoating and victim blaming. And as a matter of optimal casting for maximal devastation and humiliation of bullies and their vicious cliques, the apologetic spokespersons might be any sort of authority figures and minor celebrities, figures of pathos such as the elderly and infirm, or however passably attractive women.

    Alas, however, such opportunity is too haphazard as a reliable solution. And the bullies will only resume their harassment later on. That is why CliqueBusters seeks a comedic systematic approach, by keeping known bullies and their targets under surveillance, to perform such maneuvers consistently, subjecting the bullies to mounting frustration in locating vulnerable targets of abuse at all. Another danger to watch out for is deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept  covert relational hostility in which different people are prevented and discouraged from contact. It will be important, therefore, to speak truth to power, to thwart malicious gossip by organizing campaigns of counter gossip, sticking up for the unjustly maligned and slandered while discretely facilitating networking, communication and eventual interaction between individuals who would not otherwise have the opportunity, and to teach others the habit likewise. At the very least, targets of cliquish isolation and manipulation are better off with any crucial opportunity simply to compare notes. After all: If your not supposed to talk to me, then what am I not supposed top tell you?!

    Also, to better protect the targets of bullying, it will be important for a Clique Busters cell to assimilate the targets of bullying into their peer group, and involve themselves in the day to day lives of said targets of bullying in order to better watch out for them. To raise consciousness, close ranks, and help build such group support as will leave bullies stymied, even ones in authority. Even to adapt such solidarity mimesis as nurses on call facing abusive supervisors have categorized under "Code Pink". (Not to be confused with the better known protest group or with hospital child abduction alerts.)

    -- ever hear of a "Code Pink"? If a doctor starts to berate a nurse, the other nurses within hearing step forward beside the nurse under attack, and stare SILENTLY at the doctor until he/she realizes that the appropriate way to discuss the patient care in question would be to have pulled the nurse aside to a private area and speak as professionals. Incredibly effective, and gives the nurses a way that is not direct or aggressive to modify the oft-times stressed-out MD behavior. After a couple of times, that behavior is not repeated again on THAT floor!

    Again, the reason that bullies retreat at the sight of a target having friends, is because bullies prefer a victim they can isolate. But never a member in good standing accepted by their own immediate social circle, who may be supported when under attack. (Indeed, if future interaction on the frontiers of automated Sociometry, when operational, will, indeed, solve the problem of bullying, quite without any need for the Clique Busters, then, most simply, it will be by social embedment, leaving no stragglers at the mercy of predation and exploitation.) 

     

     
     

    Is clandestine or covert action even however utterly non violent, ever justifiable? 

    IT /bullying/ WON'T END UNLESS /UNTIL/ YOU /WE/ DO SOMETHING togetherYes, as an adjunct to more open activism, sometimes when the problem is so bad that lives are destroyed and the victimized left traumatized. Especially when the authorities, or lack (or selective responsiveness) thereof, are part of the problem, then these are by definition conditions of at least relative oppression where an autonomous resistance, underground if need be, may be indicated. Not to rule out officially endorsed Clique Busters, should such opportunity arise. Labor and student organizations may also serve as Strategic Partners or patrons. Clique Busters, should cultivate every legitimacy as a public advocacy or watchdog, wielding intimidating moral suasion, not unlike the Humane Society or the Better Business Bureau. 

    However, for Clique Busters to respond to requests for help, or even intervene autonomously in any closed or restricted social context, such as a place of employment or school, recruitment must be internal thereto, candidates approached on the outside by supporters of any target of bullying, raising awareness and support for the target of bullying. But outsiders can more readily enter into any social context more open to the public. And there are also many situations where security is low enough for infiltration may even be possible at least long enough to network local recruitment.

    Bullying can be subvered in order to backfire on bullies, by whatever exercise in low guile, to expose and humiliate sly, surreptitious and devious serial bullies while protecting and garnering support for the intended targets of bullying, the very opposite of isolating their targets as typically intended by malevolent bullies.

    Bullying is indeed the new hate crime. Bullying cliques are a particular menace also because they so readily nurture and attract into our communities, ever worse and more extreme criminals and lunatics. And then, in their cronyism, bullying cliques shelter and protect them all. Indeed, as history teaches us, the bullies' contempt for those they abuse, is often matched by a perverse reverence and adoration for the worst evildoers that come along. Far from succor and defense, the victimized may be shamed as chumps and luzers, while their abusers, deemed winners, are often actually so popular because of it.

    Sales is an application of the same principles as
    propaganda in first discovering the customer's wants and needs, making them feel special and understood, and then convincing them that what is for sale will fill their emotional void. A real con man may go further by validating the marks' desires to believe that they have some edge on other people. Bullying cliques are extremely attractive not only to the most destructive of the criminally insane, to but to the most lucid and cynical confidence tricksters. Scam artistes go to great pains to blend in, gain trust and network in order to reach out for fresh vulnerable new marks to victimize and exploit. This is called: the Affinity Scam. And bullying cliques make that so very easy. Dirty birds of a fetid feather, flock together, thick as thieves, so that in order to fit in, gaining standing and trust for networking fresh marks, the scam artiste only needs to participate and bully! Additionally, a target of bullying who so badly needs a friend, is already well set up in advance for exploitation, isolated and vulnerable for the swindling confidence trickster. Thus does bullying create a twofold target rich social environment for the confidence trickster. A scam artiste and a cliquish bully networking cronies have ever so much in common. Both are mindful of presentation in order to blend in and be accepted without suspicion. Neither are up front about their motives. Both typically appeal to the lowest common denominators of human nature, then falling back upon rationalizing fantasy.

    Abuse of power is intimidating. All rightly fear such unchecked power, and many lust after it. Pervasive peer pressure creates powerful tempting advantage and terrifying danger in
    punishment and reward systems of behavioral conditioning in the engineering of evil. When the intent of persuasion is not honest and honorable, the result is not persuasion but manipulation. And one moral or ethical compromise opens the way for the next, increasingly out of all perspective and without protest, until in too deep to wriggle out. Bullying with impunity presents opportunity for every Sadistic reward without accountability. They all fit in and benefit, so why shouldn’t I? I deserve these perks! Why should I stick my neck out? I don't deserve the grief! Better him/her than me. And I am not really adding to the harm, because if I don’t participate and bully, then sadly, the target of bullying will still be bullied by everybody else. And they must know better that me. Gotta trust my buds...! And we are all doing is for a good cause in the greater good where the ends justify the means and lies serve the higher truth!

    Perhaps therefore, whereas a confidence trickster can be ever so friendly and even reliable at first, taking such personal interest out of the blue, cliquish bullies need to be wooed in return, by compliance and gushing approval in support of all of their innuendos, lies and slanders of malicious gossip, victim blaming,
    scapegoating, ostracism, harassment and abuse. Indeed, unlike any other more detached sort of swindler, even the most amoral, uncaring, self-serving sociopathic of bullies in their delusional cult-like cliques, their world divided into targets of exploitation and cohorts therein, are typically so absurdly vested in Existential Validation of their own innuendos, lies and slanders of malicious gossip, victim blaming, scapegoating and ostracism in order to pass judgment and rationalize every extreme of worsening stages of hostility, unremitting harassment, even organized vigilante cause stalking and hypocritical pimp-like controlling sexual exploitation.

    A capable scam artiste ever remains dangerously lucid, detached and free to reach out, connect and research the next mark. By contrast, the typical bullies' Existentially Validating headlong investment and involvement of sycophantic eager gullibility in the banality of evil, even portraying themselves as somehow pro-social, is a vulnerability yet to be exploited in non violent low guile against them, exposing, denouncing, publicly shaming and effectively combating bullying, especially in social context where there is no authority to appeal to for help, or those in charge abuse power the worst, making them the most dangerous and destructive cliquish bullies and cronies of all, so long overdue to be ousted by democracy in action.

    The simplest of CliqueBusters ops as conceived, are straightforward Transactional Antithesis mostly in order to foil deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility as may arise, in support of hither to isolated targets of bullying. But any thought of actually manipulating the downfall, public exposure and disgrace of serial bullies or the ouster of abusers of powered their cronies, may actually be considered of in terms of undercover police sting operations to expose malfeasant intentions, or even confidence trickery known as: the con game, more specifically the long con or sting, wherein the motivating outside man, whether they are brought in on the op or not, would be any target of bullying and actually therefore beneficiary of intervention.

    The inside man would play the rôle of another bully, a sycophantic crony, in order to infiltrate any bullying clique. Optionally, the face may be playing the rôle of a seemingly pliable and readily manipulated sex object, the spoils of cockblocking and the honor protection racket, such ongoing social scams that CliqueBusters is conceived in response. Bullies, ever open to malicious gossip and malignant conspiracy, proverbially "as thick as thieves" Sadists, braggarts that cronies that they are, will always be greedy suckers for sycophantic Existential Validation and Appeal to Spite, no matter how slippery and cagy they always are otherwise. But bullies in tandem may ignore a new comer, a bully craving attention and approval by joining in. It will be important, instead, to do as they do and repeat what they say. Indeed, their weaknesses both of sheer evil and their craving for validating impunity, must be continually exploited against them. For Sun Tzu said: "War is deception." Indeed, this is war, not revenge, and as Clausewitz points out, the objective of war is simply to destroy the enemy's ability to do harm, indeed their entire wherewithal and morale thereto. 

    Just imagine bullies brought to a fever pitch of malicious glee in a completely staged scenario, only then to be brought crashing down again in massive humiliating public exposure, unambiguous rage and contempt. Not only are those of CliqueBusters as conceived, such plainly the most effective known tactics, but being made fools and losing face, is the only way for serial bullies to be made atoned, to be ridiculed and killjoyed of all Sadistic validation and stripped of all ill gotten advantage gained or derived from bullying, indeed the only way in which amoral sociopathic and cognitively dissident hostile serial bullies can ever experience any sensation of shame and accountability before the world for the evil that they commit, so that those victimized will finally be vindicated and the abuse can at long last be halted so that all can live free from fear. All in all, CliqueBusters is the least destructive best strategic and most moral conceivable approach, just the right thing to do and so long overdue. 

    With covert video for media tie-in, think of 'The Joe Schmo Show', but with an engineered fools paradise for bullies, dashed in their faces at the very height of their Sadistic euphoria.

    1. Putting the mark up consists in locating and investigating a well-to-do victim, but instead, for purposes of a CliqueBusters sting op, selecting the bullies to take down.
    2. Playing the con: surreptitiously gaining the marks' confidence. Bullies are unbelievably gullible to the Affinity Scam: Bullies, proverbially "as thick as thieves" Sadists and braggarts that they are, ever eager for the malicious gossip and malignant conspiracy by which they so powerfully network and exchange vulnerable targets to gang up on and bully together, will always be greedy suckers for Existential co-Validation and Appeal to Spite, even no matter how consistently slippery and cagy they are otherwise. 
    3. Roping the marks: steering them to meet or discover the inside man.
    4. Telling the marks the tale: Permitting the inside man to show the marks, being such conies and bullies, how to gain for themselves, dishonestly. In terms of a CliqueBusters sting op, the fictitiously gainful opportunity in the scenario consists of any flagrant bullying that actually will instead only blow up in the marks faces, spectacularly. Or the purpose of the op might be espionage of anything sensitive or incriminating to be used against the bullies later on, again, simply by stroking the braggarts, otherwise so cagey. Again, the gains typically accrued of bullying, are sadistic satisfaction, hypocritical Existential Validation, popularity, control, sexual exploitation, all opportunities and advantage, socially. The greed for all of these incentives is readily exploitable and turned against bullies, and the ugliness by which to expose bullying and heap upon them ridicule and shame. -Thereby to vindicate the hapless targets of relentless serial bullying and slander.
    5. Giving the marks the convincer: Allowing the mark to gain substantially, or better still, only creating the illusion thereof. In terms of a CliqueBusters sting op, this may consist in gloating with them about their part in a staged and actually harmless move against whatever targets of bullying, with only key events actually staged, and the rest offstage and reported in prepared dialogue or written correspondence and false documentation.
    6. Giving the marks the breakdown: Determining exactly how far the marks can be coaxed to go.
    7. Putting the marks on the send: Setting them off to invest whatever efforts or resources into whatever putatively requisite preliminaries.
    8. Taking off the touch: Playing the marks against whatever desired big score but actually only achieving the true end purpose of the long con.
    9. Generally, the climax of any long con comes is: blowing off the marks, getting them out of the way as quickly and quietly as possible. But the point of a sting against wrong doers, is the very opposite, just the reverse, their most spectacular and protracted exposure, scorn, humiliation and moral victory for bringing them down, or indeed, perhaps better to say: blowing up the marks! Indeed, this will be the ideal time for first widest release of covert video records of the entire op in celebratory anti-bullying counterpropaganda!
    10. Generally, the dénouement of any long con, is: putting in the fix, forestalling action by the law. But a CliqueBusters op should remain within the law. It is petty criminal bullies who should fear the law. We should only hope to draw official attention to any such rampant abuse and so neglected by the authorities as bullying. But undermining and forestalling in advance, whatever conceivable possible sort of bullying retaliation, forestalling, rather than unlikely police response, well foreseeable action by whatever corrupt self appointed authority in whatever toxic and hostile social environment, might be worthy of due consideration. This may best be achieved by keeping the bullies on the defensive. Indeed, a new long con may be initiated towards renewed CliqueBusters sting ops, exploiting the strategically retreating bullies' burning desire to regroup, recover and vengefully counterattack. Rinse. lather, repeat.

    Targets of bullying, harried and calumniated, need to be befriended and everyone reciprocally isolated by such relentlessly manipulative covert relational hostility, needs to be networked and brought together if only in order to freely compare notes and expose the truth. But as long as bullies seek to regroup and cco-validate, their scheming must be infiltrated and undermined. And abusers ready to change, must be availed of better influences and support. Infiltration and intelligence gathering must remain ongoing, in order better to direct future action.

    Ultimately, abusive serial bullies are so vulnerable to public shame and exposure via any effective countergossip from any competitive and well organized counterpropaganda machine, driven by capable infiltration and covert videography exploiting the typical bullies vanity and desperation for approval and validation in turn accounting for their eagerness, when stroked, to brag incessantly of all that they'd never dare confess under any duress. Truly, haven't cliques of serial bullies and cronies been just daring us all for entirely long enough?

     

     

    Turning the tables?

    Indeed, much as not only predation and dominance propagate among the predators and oppressors, with oppression also propagating among the oppressed, likewise democracy, reason and tolerance must also propagate. Nothing can be taken for granted and fair play must be zealously enforced by moral suasion at all times. Alas, all too often, such will be an uphill struggle. Whatever can improve transmission of democracy, reason and tolerance would be as proactive, responsive, cooperative and enhance connectivity in some coherent manner, much as are predation, exploitation, dominance and bullying themselves, but without predation, exploitation, dominance and bullying, because, of course, that would be entirely purpose defeating. 

    Nevertheless, this hypothetical Memplex must be equipped with it's own defense, not only in the individual mind, but also within societal interaction. And so, it must also help to marginalize predation, exploitation, dominance and bullying, selectively non destructively enough not become or conform to the very predation, exploitation, dominance and bullying it seeks to oppose. 

    And this protective propensity in functional society has a name. It is called, civility. And civility is very nice when one can find it! Far to rarely, alas. 

    Nietzsche tended to view Altruism, morality, sympathy and responsibility, as an albatross, holding back the individual from self realization of freedom and autonomy. And there is no denying the personal sacrifice inherent in living by any moral principles at all. But it is through the workings of democratic values in society that moral constraint and compassion may actually aid and abet self realization. The only question is as to the feasibility of such a thing and the opportunity to overthrow the Post Modern Cynicism which Nietzsche foresaw and where in 'justice' signifies no more than the self serving interest of the stronger, exactly as the Sophist Thrasymachus asserts to Socrates in Plato's Dialogues. 

     

     

    Playing hardball:

    Beyond striving peacefully to reduce ones own personal contribution to current harm and suffering of others, there is endeavor at harm reduction via reform of existing conditions by non-violent social, political and economic means, well short of forceful and even violent uprising and destruction: BLOCK IT, BREAK IT, TAKE IT! Direct action consists in non destructive obstruction, destruction of privileged control that turns whatever sort public institution into the property of a few abusers of power, and finally reclamation and expropriation more publically. Support all thereof, may consist in research, intelligence, coordination, logistics and communication, as well as resource acquisition. The building of alternative systems, here consists in networking independently and even the coordination and orchestration of backchannels to mend the isolation and disenfranchisement resultant from covert relational hostility and ostracism. Indirect action consists in promotion, information, consciousness raising and counterpropaganda, art, rallies, agitation, protest, lobbying, and more, along with passive resistance and civil disobedience as applicable.

    Remember that when the target tries to get the bullying stopped, or simply begins to do better socially despite the bullying, the bullies will be threatened and jealous, thus abuse predictably escalates, character assassination shifts from the trivial and picayune into the downright ugly,  and the target can be put at extreme risk. And this is consistent with the escalation response to Transactional Antithesis by the most entrenched headgamers. Not to mention criminals, who are often only extreme bullies.

    And all of this is another reason intervention by others is key, so that the heat won't just be all on the bullies' target. Not to mention weakening the social standing of bullying behavior. Remember that the bullies will prefer to see only their victimized target as the problem. That is why they must be afforded greater problems at all times. All this may seem a ways to go, but such is hard ball. And why, under any circumstances, whatever realistic alternatives to Clique Busters, if any, may well be considered. Because of the danger of escalation in conflict. Alas, the problem remains that bullies escalate abuse, also, and no less, even when they get their way. Because bullying is about incrementally advancing dominance and abuse, under any circumstances what so ever. There simply is no pleasing tyrants and their goons. 

    Therefore, in case of serious escalation, the situations must be carefully managed in order to explode in the bullies faces all the more spectacularly, so that, truth exposed, they may be that much less driven by the overwhelming compulsion of denial to get away with shit. If nothing else, stubborn bullies must be helped to strip themselves of all copy cat sycophancy and the sheer lunatic "dry drunk" temptation of enablement and impunity for their bullying. Without support, the bully's' abusiveness will only isolate the bully rather than their targets, as it should be and would be in a just and civil society. And the sooner the better for everyone. The bullies included, because outreach may then become more feasible. 

    If even future interaction on the frontiers of automated Sociometry alone cannot do the job, an isolated bully may then be the more amenable to, and less distracted from, integration into a custom generated local social network, where their deep emotional needs can be addressed, their talents best encouraged, but where they will find no cronies, enablers, or vulnerable bullying opportunities, until such time as the bullies have learned responsibility and empathy.

    Will there be bullies too hardened, desperate, amorally sociopathic, self-controlled or clever, to be exposed, deterred or dissuaded by Clique Busters? Answer:
    We should assume the worst just to be safe. And, indeed, there are particularly stubborn, facile and well adapted types and tactics populating the bullying circle. Or particularly badly adapted and inflexible bullies. Clique Busters will be just another tool to render the social environment the less amenable to their abusive conspiracies.

    There are also more the violent bullies who must be dealt with to the full extent of the law, and their targets protected in the mean time. 

    And there are facile consummate lying and manipulative veritable politicians, who must simply be exposed and defeated politically.

    And in politics and activism of what ever sort, it will be well for Clique Busters to understand the sinister Consensus and Facilitation chicanery known as The Delphi Technique [diagram] and how best to defuse/disrupt it.

    WARNING: Questionable ulterior political agenda in evidence! 
    On her excellently informative WebPages in resistance to consensus manipulation , linked above, Lynn M. Stuter herself nevertheless remains seemingly oblivious to the irony of opposing consensus manipulation while proclaiming a Christian American nation and calling, on constitutional grounds, for the elimination of government run public schools, while explicitly denying to me ever harboring ulterior motive whatsoever, let alone that of restoring prayer into the context of what passes for education. Hardly!

     

     

    Infiltration ops

    All therefore, Clique Busters infiltration remains an important consideration because, unlike overt harassment, much of destructive covert relational hostility is orchestrated and carried out behind the targets' backs. Cliquish bullying is no vast government conspiracy, but entirely grassroots and widespread malignant conspiratorial malice and self serving, the lowest common denominator of human nature.

    Extensive personal manipulation is contrived and practiced to promote specific patterns of behavior and emotion, who and what one must approve or disapprove, together assimilate or ostracize, in such a way that it appears responsive and situational, while it actually has been prompted and orchestrated by the ring leaders of the controlling clique. The individual within the clique then increasingly develops the psychology of the pawn, and participates actively in the manipulation of others. Peer pressure and reinforcement legitimizes the deception and abuse used to influence and bully others.

    This is why open and publicly visible freedom of association, the very motivated goal ever put forth of Clique Busters, is also crucial to tempting victims out from abusive relationships; even although, primarily, Clique Busters is conceived of as to serve targets of bullying who want nothing what so ever to do with the bullies hounding them.

    Nevertheless, bullies also sexually and emotionally exploit victims whom they draw in and isolate within their cult-like cliques. When a cult or a clique is recruiting, they only give the prospective recruit a little information at a time and lead them along in an environment they control, so that one never is availed of any opportunity to look too closely at the big picture that no one in their right mind and good conscience could ever fall for.  If anyone has manipulated you into cognitive dissonance, then deep down you already sensed their dishonest malice in that somehow you knew not to question them to closely. ]

    Beware the insidious and ubiquitous cult of socialization replete with exhortations to heteronomy for the sake of social success: Socialization is the process of Behavioral Modification by which norms and expectations are not so much informed or explained but, well, to be honest, indoctrinated into the individual, in order that by means of uncomprehending behavioral motivators, extrinsic motivation, attitudes, values and taboo, are all blithely internalized. -Ever so crucial in order to function in society, so we are all assured. "It's for your own good, dear!" But what if one gets socialized by complete douche bags? Well, that is where utter tools come from: the memetic propagation of complete douche baggery! So, never be socialized by complete douche bags!

     
    CONDITIONS FOR MIND CONTROL as outlined by Margaret T. Singer, Ph.D., Emeritus Prof. of Psychology, Univ. of CA, Berkeley, include Coordinated programs of coercive influence and behavior control, 2nd Generation Thought Reform Systems, attacks on central elements of self, as applicable with only minor modification to slightly variant context of this webpage:

    1. Systematic punishment and reward: enlist recruit's cooperation by
        enticement and bribery (approval, status, influence, social networking,
        access to desirable sexual prospects)
    2. obtain psychological dominance by making the subject's continuing
        relations contingent upon continuing membership participation
    3. employ seduction by developing bonds and encouraging recruits to
        believe the group, only, can provide for such wants and needs
    4. develop dependency by direct social pressure to influence a
        decision that the group has special power or knowledge or
        can solve life's problems; the people in the group are made to
        seem interested in what is best for the recruit -- then they "up
        the commitment level"
    5. debilitating submerged guilt and thence corruption of young and 
        old alike is then effected by rendering them jaded and inured to
        witness, endure and even participate in ever more flagrant cruelty
        and dishonesty.
    6. shift the target's social and emotional attachments to individuals
        who have already accepted high commitment and are conforming
        to the behavior

    WHILE
        decreasing the target's outside relationships

    7. increase the CHANGES in the target's:
        personal friends/social life
        interpersonal networking
        business dealings or employment
        income
        finances
        sexuality
    THIS INCREASES THE THREAT TO THE PERSON IF THEY WANT TO LEAVE
    OR TO STRAY, TO SPEND MORE TIME ALONE OR OUTSIDE THE GROUP.
    THREATS ARE TO THE INDIVIDUAL'S    
        stability of identity
        emotional well-being
        safety, security and standing within the group.

    8. the cliquish community standards become the ONLY standards available
        for self-evaluation under disorientation via ambient or stealth abuse.

    By the conditionality of strokes meeting emotional needs only given the desired responses, peer pressure of negative conditioning and even emotional tear town against undesired response and awkward begged questions and generally obstructing and discouraging error checking, the technique of graduated indoctrination can be employed, with continual repetition, so as to gradually reshape the subject's belief's or position. Most commonly, whatever innocuous seeming truisms may be utilized initially as a starting point, and then the behaviors and rationalizations thereof of the clique are slowly and stealthily introduced and connected thereto, unexamined. In this way, the individual subject may be coaxed to perceive the righthink the peer group as consistent with their own own habits, personal boundaries and perceptions, no matter how jarring and suspicious it all might have been, had the proverbial cards all been laid out on the metaphorical table from the beginning, instead.

    And in case any of the above threaten to become too transparent, then often find added thereto, like sly, deceptive, manipulative strangers with candy, the trollish exploitation of confidence online or offline alike.

    All of the above is why it can be of great value for clique infiltration to also serve as a covert outreach to maneuver the exploited into forbidden contact with the target pariahs, to begin comparing notes, even bonding. Perhaps someday in future this will be readily accomplished by routine interaction on the frontiers of automated Sociometry. But for now, when healthy and functional channels of interpersonal networking, contact and information are deviously and coercively obstructed, human intervention remains necessary.

    Infiltration into bullying cliques that are so often a first line of isolation shielding a private world of exploitative relationships, may also prove a valuable avenue for covert outreach and needed intervention and victims assistance from all manner of abuse. And so, Clique Busters should also coordinate with victim's rights advocacies and initiatives against relationship and domestic abuse.

    The Clique Busters Zen, the moral bottom line, is, if you ever met an isolated, abused and exploited individual, would you befriend them and try to help them out from abuse, isolation and exploitation? And would you ever go out of your way to do it again on purpose? And would you ever do so discretely, if that where called for? Even to the point of humoring and deceiving control-freaks who are known to consistently run interference?

     

    Covert Videography

    Big Brother's watching? Well, Little Brother is watching right back! And the whole world's watching with him

    It is common sense enough advice to be circumspect, and give bullies enough rope to hang themselves, when they talk like bullies. To swallow ones ire, and even prompt them to continue. But often that simply isn't enough for proving malfeasance or acquiring crucial intelligence. And this is a very serious matter.

    Optionally, all interviews, infiltration, response tests, events as they unfold and so much more, can all be covertly recorded electronically. Of course, this constitutes a violation of privacy. Just as good street lights violate the essential privacy of muggers and burglars! No, damn it, abuse and conspiracy thereof is not part of the legitimate privacy of the abuser. Much as their sycophants will complain.

    And, as a legal argument, we all record our experiences in our brains anyhow. Including conversation, how we sound out others, no less than whatever we actually do or witness. And this is within our rights. Better recording our own experiences electronically, even secretly, is distinct from planting bugs to invade privacy in order learn what happens when we are not there. (A far more difficult moral quandary.) We have the right to keep and to share records for our own strategic defense, and for the defense of others. To participatory cultivation of better information resources than the poison grapevines controlled by bullies. But I leave technological deployment issues to the individual conscience and legal precedents as they unfold.

    Courts, incidentally, may tend to be even friendlier to the admission in to evidence of covert electronic surveillance by by witnesses to or participants in events and conversations in public venues, than where it to be from within any sort of personal residence where greater expectations of privacy might at all obtain. And that has included, for example, self incriminating bragging bullies at restaurant outings.

    But of course, laws vary between jurisdictions. Massachusetts recording laws in particular, are the closest to anyone's worst fears, fortunately contested, constitutionally. The biggest problem, legally, is that whereas an individual targeted and singled out for bullying, might naturally be guided to pursue action as against discrimination, bullying fits poorly under legal definitions of discrimination in most of the world, because that's got it backwards: Only in Ireland is discrimination by minority or class recognized, rather, as a special case of bullying. Instead perhaps USC 18 Section 241 might better serve, if only supporting evidence is obtainable.

    Whatever strategies to be pursued, Clique Busters, conceived among other things, as an electronic sleuth-it-yourself reciprocal assistance circle for isolated targets of bullying, would already serve as a great help. The Clique Busters Zen, the moral bottom line, is, if you came upon abuse of whatever sort, the act, preparation, or the conspiracy, while a ready camcorder happened to be on your person, would you, even in secret, press the button to record? If yes, then would you ever go out of your way, seeking to ever do it on purpose? Indeed, might you ever need anyone to do as much for you?

    Big Brother is watching. But Little Brother is watching back! Welcome to the surveillance society. You can even borrow the equipment and facilities as needed, much the way one checks out books from the local library, by joining your local Cable Access channel and thereby becoming an independent cable access producer. The genie is well out of the bottle. Let's make good from it. There are powerful applications to counterpropaganda, and if need be, legal evidence, to oppose bullies decisively. And they might never back down and desist unless and until they know we mean business. Indeed, the warning signs of bullying can also be captured on camera for the added persuasion of pathos. 

    Moreover, there may also be the open brandishment of camcorders and the like, to intimidate wrong doing and hearten opposition. A matter for prudent judgment, however, should discretion prove the better part of valor. 

    In any case, Clique Busters is not dependant upon that technology. Only likely enhanced by it. Also, there may yet even be the prospect of lucrative Reality TV rights.

  • Anti-bullying VIDIOGRAPHY opportunities for national TV...
  • How to Turn Your Smartphone Into the Ultimate Spy Tool  
  • Video of organized gang stalking
  •  
     
     
    Misbehaviorism:
    Clique Busters Guerilla Transactional Antithesis and Reconditioning 
     

    If the target seems isolated and vulnerable, harassment will ensue. Or, conversely, if the target initiates contact, or if contact is initiated with the target, covert relational hostility and even overt harassment will ensue. The behavioral responses of bullies are predictable, and they can be entrapped in carefully staged sting operations, appealing anti-bullying behaviors that spectators, both interested and unwitting, will be encouraged to learn and to imitate. Thus will a new behavioral structure be provided.

    The manipulative bully, outmaneuvered consistently, will no longer be able to exploit the civilized restraint and vulnerability of the target of bullying.

    Indeed, if the right buttons can be pressed, a bully can be manipulated into eruptions of temper and loose face completely without dragging anyone down except for other bullies iinvolved. But even that may be deemed less poetic justice, seeing as how perfectly nice people can and are also incited to loss of temper. Yet it may still be an important strategic option. For clear and distinct poetic justice that unambiguously demonstrates the point, ignoble thwarted bullying should clearly be the cause of a bully's public temper tantrum and loss of face, unmasking the inner ugliness and immaturity of a facile bully to public scorn. 

    Otherwise, any mere taste of their own medicine, may do no more than sink to their own level, and make little point, indeed, just as the most facile and gutless critics of Clique Busters have opined. Bullies can and do already bully one another, after all. So, are such slippery tactics right and just? Yes, in self defense. Certainly when the bully initiates the conflict, and seeks to harmfully manipulate the target of bullying. 

     

    Moral quandaries of entrapment 

    The standard and proper ethical standard regarding entrapment is that the sting ought to be legally invalidated in cases of anyone being coerced or drawn into something that one would not otherwise do. For example, even a Vice Cop posing as a prostitute must lay in wait for suspects already seeking to break the law rather than pirsuing the innocent and normallu law abiding with overwjelming temptation or by enacting the most unlukely scenarions. For devilishly leading dupes astray, hounding law abiding citizens, or even manipulatively fabricating opportunities and temptations that are unusual and unrealistic, drawing those who would otherwise never have transgressed, and even exerting pressure, is rightly criticized that such ought to be out of bounds for any subsequent prosecution. 

    Likewise, what would be excessive might be to really hound and peer pressure anyone until they gave way, implicated themselves by joining into wrong doing, and then, say, to actually blackmail them. For such, indeed, is a common criminal and fascist political scam. However, triggering the knee-jerk responses of bullies against their targets of bullying, in staged scenarios, sting operations, in order to exploit their paranoia of public exposure against them, can fall well within the envelope which is the entire point. If, and only if, bullies are already on the attack, then let it be in the time and place of our choosing, better than theirs, and with preparation, to regain the initiative, which is the ability to make credible threat.

     

    Sun Tzu said:Be mysterious!” 

    It is important to always present bullies with the opposite of what they are counting on. To read them the riot act when they laugh up their sleeves, expecting one to swallow one's rage. But then one must stay calm when they are trying to get one's goat. Clique Busters, after all, is about regaining the all too crucial initiative. 

     

    Reverse Psychology 

    Emotional quotient is the quotient between the "emotional age" and the chronological age in order to measure Emotional Intelligence, how well a person understands emotions, intelligence regarding the emotions, especially in the ability to monitor one's own or others' emotions, particularly as determined by such as the MSCEIT (Meyer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test).

    Another Clique Busters strategic option may be to actually egg on bullies, in such a way that it will be obvious that they are being set up, and ridiculing them in the process. As they come to resent this, they may actually be conditioned to become suspicious and resentful of the attention, support and Existential co-Validation they crave for bullying. Such tactics may be most effective in reconditioning with followers, blistering outright sheeple, the "mobbing" and shunning copycat bullies and often characterized by underdeveloped Emotional Intelligence as opposed to the narcissistic indifference more typical of their ring leaders.

    In a carefully controlled and orchestrated scenario, imagine repeatedly actually setting up bullies, egging on a bully, but progressively in an ever more a loud crass publicly mocking manner, ever more clearly at the bully's expense, there by conditioning the increasingly uneasy bully to actually mistrust enablers and instigators! That might be particularly good for copycat bullies, together with open discussion to help them gain the desired perception and perspective with regards to their conduct, and how they might actually appear to others they ever might ever hope to impress. 

    In other words, by orchestration and subterfuge, to actively condition by humiliation and shaming, the clear and distinct impression that bullying is actually ignominious, an unworthy conduct marked by and attended upon by discreditable public contempt, until the behavior pattern abates and is redeemed by change to the better. 

     

    Maneuvering the enemy

    While bullying can be a very public display, even so, bullies are often very sneaky. Or they just have sheer unmitigated brass and show no empathy or conscience, smugly playing it off like nothing at all. Such bullies are all about getting away with bullying.

    Exposed and shamed bullies will slink away. But they must never be allowed to save face in this way. They must slyly be momentarily obstructed just momentarily and long enough to be scolded and asked to leave. And they must be identified for the record and perhaps even an update to The National Bullies Register. (If only to test if it's actually up and running.)
     
    And the bullies must be entrapped into this object lesson, incessantly, so that there disgrace will become widely known and embraced, and they will deprived of all opportunities for bullying with impunity. 
     
     
    Thwarting the bullies, continually 
     
    In case of Relational Bullies simply pursuing the strategic and maliciously motivated goal put forth only in private, of disrupting the targets' social connectivity and isolating them, then the bullies must perceive increasing support and sympathy for their target(s), and as a direct result of the bullying. The very opposite of the bullies motivating goal, even if put forth only in private.
     
    If the bullies like to be congratulated on their destructive behavior, then they must accrue only ridicule and scorn of the bullying behavior and character defect in specific. Indeed, neither the bullies nor the society will learn anything, unless the point stays clear. No, Clique Busters is not mere bullying of bullies. They may often do that to each other anyhow! And painful as that might be, it only tends to Existentially Validation them that they are no worse than anyone else.
     
    Nevertheless, no matter the convenient picayune petty peeves of the bullies against their targets of abuse, it hardly follows that all targets of bullying are themselves bullies or instigators.

    Ever playing the Transactional Antithesis, impunity must be nullified by accountability, sly secrecy by public exposure, every manner of such ongoing self justification, however deranged and hypocritical, that is called: Existential Validation, by unflinching truth in brutal candor. If the sneaky bullies need to get away with something, then they should never. If the bullies need any moralistic pro-social vindication, as in the petty vigilantism of supposedly "protecting" others from the target's mythical undesirability (that, typically, the bullies have themselves manufactured into the public consciousness) or from the target's efforts to reach out for social contact, however awkward, either intrinsically or else especially given the obstructive and confidence shattering impossible situation of being continually stalked and targeted for bullying in an increasingly hostile social environment, then self serving self appointed unasked "protection", as particularly of typical cockblocking, must be something to even be deliberately tempted from conniving bullies, only to then be answered with consistent public scorn, disgust and ridicule at every attempt, and then denounced, in counterpropaganda, as the veiled intimidation, cockblocking slut shaming sexual exploitation and covert relational hostility that it truly is. 
     
    Clique Busters must be chronic kill-joys, taking all the fun out of bullying in order to help put a stop to it. 
     
    And all this directly challenges the cultural glorification of jealousy, at the root of so much social strife and so many dysfunctional relationships.
     
    The moral bottom line is, would you ever be so hard on bullies, if the problem was that far gotten out of hand, and a strong rebuke where called for? And, under any circumstances, would you ever condone orchestration of such a practical rebuke, if ever such appeared needful?

     

     

     

     

    counterpropaganda/countergossip 

    “A friend is a person who says nice things about you behind your back.”

    Of course, Clique Busters ultimately aims at building effective and open consensus against bullying. At any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. But at some point, we must speak out for Clique Busters to begin propagating culturally. That is why protest and counterpropaganda attack operations are also key to Clique Busters, Online, by flyers, buttons, other handouts, eye witness video and word of mouth. 

    Connection and attachment require comfort for vulnerability and focus. Therefore covert Relational Bullies slyly cultivate discomfort and disruption, in order to exclude and isolate targets of bullying. But just as such bullying is tightly orchestrated, likewise exposure and denunciation against them can likewise be orchestrated. And by such example, people can be drawn in to participate, educated to follow suit, thereby making such bullyproofing customary, raising better functional expectations and helping to inoculate a social circle with civility against bullying.

    Consciousness raising and orchestrated countergossip,  expanding counter-mimesis and with a vengeance! And this may necessarily entail that bullies may come to experience dystress from harsh public criticism of their behavior. The bullies, after all, are to be pitied, having scorned every true friend to teach them right from wrong. And some one must rise to tell them "no."

    Just as bullies coordinate, going forth in order to circulate and disseminate whatever their talking points of unrelenting hate speech against targets of bullying, participants in Clique Busters campaign of counterpropaganda/countergossip, would contradict them, praising and defending targets of bullying and denouncing the bullies and their conduct. proffering not mere criticism, but truthful grievance. For the motive of CliqueBusters is not merely of tactical, but of moral victory and value.

    .com  

    Victim blaming is typical of bullying: The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place, and with such utter impunity. And this is the most deplorable  hypocrisy. Especially given how bullies will hate those they victimize all the more, ever should they overcome and succeed, than should they fail.

    "Look what you made us do!" complain the bullies...

    Victim blaming typically seeks to locate all problems in whatever alleged deficiency in social skills and such, of the target of bullying. A Clique Busters campaign of counterpropaganda/countergossip must therefore extol the tremendous grace under fire, of target's of bullying, even suggesting that the bullies could stand to learn form that example of self-control.

     

    Tactics for undermining petty demagoguery

    A speaker who starts by forthrightly explaining how he wants his audience to respond may be said to practice the most honest and transparent techniques of direct persuasion. But if, instead, other cues are utilized to demonstrate and inculcate the desired "correct" validated frame of response, this is nothing more than somewhat heavy handed Behavior Modification and suggestion building up mounting peer pressure.
     
    For example, even the most trivial and picayune and even utterly boring prosaic narratives may be delivered in the most hushed dramatic tones of incredulity, ridicule and outrage. After all, a petty peeve may incorporate some particle of truth, but it remains picayune and must be exposed, ridiculed and denounced as such. In such event, CliqueBusters should invite others to listen from hiding to any such scenario, and then infiltrate by first joining in to feign approval and amplify the loud-mouth bully, who will be at first delighted, but then, to the loud mouthed bully's horror, shifting into raucous parody, all before the gales of uproarious laughter from the audience that the Clique Busters have brought in tow to help make fools of the petty bullies. Covert video recording can then be deployed in extensive follow up counterpropaganda to the effect that whatever evil gossip accusations against the target of bullying tend to be so utterly without merit as to be laughable, and that there is always, in persecution, impunity, a manifest crisis of real accountability.
     
    Of course, defamation tends to unfold behind the back of the target and/or may be sprung on the undefended target of bullying by surprise, and so response may be difficult. Hence, effective covert infiltration monitoring of the cliques of enemy bullies is requisite, as is support and defense of the target of bullying, for any intelligence gathering and counter-operations culminating in a sting to turn the tables on the bullies and liars. Dramatic "tisk-tisk" shock and great relish expressed in the exchange of evil gossip often serves to render it somehow surprising, conclusive, damning and the more humiliating. Of course, evil gossip quickly becomes self validating, as does the typical McCarthy style bureaucratic manufacture of fraudulent information. Both patterns are similarly characterized by a mob mentality and transfer of individual responsibility for all statement and action. Of course, all evil gossip and McCarthyistic abuse of process as often accompanies the most thoroughly orchestrated harassment, should be quickly repackaged and emphatically disseminated by Clique Busters into righteously indignant counter-accusations of kangaroo court, ambient or stealth abuse. malicious evil gossip and pernicious lying.
     
    Often, blithe argument against whatever misunderstanding may, by eliciting whatever the same decoding error or falling back upon whatever the same faulty background information assumptions, even seemingly confirm, compound and reinforce the same confusion. The more so, then, when cunningly inveigled into futile struggle with deliberate and malicious distortion.
     
    In the words of G. C. Lichtenberg “The most dangerous untruths are truths slightly distorted.” Indeed, a standard technique of lying and defamation is to take anything out of context. But the lie may then even be exposed by restoring whatever omitted salient detail, unless, of course, all such rebuttal is obstructed, shouted down, or buried. And, again, false context and bias may even be manufactured by the Big Lie of sheer suggestion, strong peer pressure combined with Appeal to Spite, as when utterly dishonest and hostile interpretation is presented as preface to bias quotations and citations from the target of bullying, ostensibly damned in their own words. Indeed, such bias and suggestion in propaganda are well known to often override even the evidence of the senses, let alone Critical Thinking! Any response then becomes difficult and complicated, on the defensive, relying upon an appeal to reason and demanding of others to get beyond the great flourish of presentation and actually scrutinize for themselves whatever purported evidence in question before them, to see if indeed it at all even supports or corresponds to the distorted allegations at all. By the time the truth is at all dragged into the light, it will be hard work to sustain anyone's exhausted patience in order to regain the initiative and evoke moral outrage against the lying bullies.
     

    .com  

    Hence, the target may be faced with a most calamitous dilemma of either getting sucked in to a cycle of attrition and exhaustion or else of passively abandoning all defense against the most damaging covert relational hostility and defamatory character assassination. It is in such event that Clique Busters intervention and support can be crucial, to regain presentation and context of whatever quotations and citations, restore accuracy, expose distortion and regain initiative and reverse scapegoating, better if quickly, before public opinion firms and sets. 
     
    “A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.” — Mark Twain

     

     

     

     
     
    Everyone gossips, but malicious gossip and name calling in particular,
    manifest special conspiratorial and anticompetitive adversative mode of Memetics and negative communication in social networks:
     
    “The public have an insatiable curiosity to know everything, except what is worth knowing.”  — Oscar Wilde
     
    “It isn't what they say about you, it's what they whisper.”  — Errol Flynn

    “When people don't know what's going on in your life they speculate, when they think they know they fabricate, and when they do know they just hate you.”"  unknown

    “Do you know that some people hate you because someone lied to them about you?”  — Clinton Baruch   

    “In the adversative mode, ideas influence their hosts to attack or sabotage competing movements. That is, the host can either harm nonhost individuals or destroy their memes’ ability to spread."  — Aaron Lynch,  Thought Contagion How Belief Spreads Through Society
     
    Ostracism and social isolation of targeted individuals creates an information vacuum, so fertile for the spread of malicious gossip and propaganda, the means of transmission in the adversative mode of memetics, wherein, much as Sun Tzu said of water always seeking the low ground. Gossip is electric! And like unto electricity leaping to the best available conductor, the vector of adversative mode memetics sought out by malicious gossip are those individuals of low character, bullies ands cronies most deplorably receptive thereto. Bullies no less readily exploit cognitive dissonance, cowardice and complicity in others. Those who demonstratively shun gossip, washing their hands, are cowards remaining in the dark and out of the fray.

    Malicious gossip partakes in propaganda. And to quote from a groundbreaking and renowned innovator in slander and acknowledged authority upon the subject of propaganda, no less and none other than Nazi Reich Minister of Propaganda Joseph Goebbels: Propaganda becomes ineffective, the moment we become aware of it.” Yes, the lying monster in a moment of smug but lucid honesty. And yet, this only applies to propaganda deception, not propaganda pandering. Indeed not to temptation to Sadism, pandering to evil and mean spirit, not sly propaganda that invites the consumer of propaganda to participate, to join in and double down on whatever malicious propaganda mendacity. Decent and intelligent folk readily see though such appeals to triviality and mean spirit that actually should raise no concerns as to the character of the target thereof. Indeed, that kind of ire is even known for often being elicited actually by praise worthy strength of good character, honesty and rectitude.

    Alas, many are the dizzying gambits and convolutions  of craven taboo for so blithely sidestepping reality and justice by cleaving to mendacious consensus manipulation. And another more subtle invalidation as transmitted via propagandistic malicious gossip, amounts to descriptive innuendo perhaps even falling under the diagnostic category of pervasive developmental disorders referring to a category of disorders purportedly characterized by delays in the development of socialization (that none dare call: brainwash) and socially skilled communication skills. Thus to blithely rationalizes all bullying suffered by the targeted individual, and neatly sidestep every pertinent question of Ontology and morality, of truth and fairness, bringing a justifying glorified scientific gloss over any observation that someone does not seem to be fitting in socially. Indeed such quasi-psychiatric negative communication in social networks or: adversative memetics, raises every specter of political abuse in psychiatry as directed against dissidents. All of this comes to a long way around of victim blaming, denigrating and dismissing the unpopular as socially inept or awkward, and then the socially inept or awkward as insane. Indeed a convoluted sophistry of craven small minded gossip, that indeed should lose its persuasion once as herein deconstructed and exposed. Such much indeed, for all arbitrarily normative criteria of psychiatric health as ever more pervasively embraced under the cultural influence of the falsely reputable cult pathology known as Behaviorism that enfolds no other treatment criteria except conformity and the extraction of subject compliance. Not to digress.

       •  Negative and positive communication in social network

     
    Negativity Friendships: To quote Alice Roosevelt Longworth: “If you can’t say something good about someone, sit right here by me.” It is only human nature that hate garners the most attention, and we enjoy meeting others who dislike the same things about others as we ourselves do. But all things in moderation. For in bullying that natural impulse runs amok in the most malicious gossip, proselytizing and actingout. 

    In the alternative, be a mensch, a leader and not a follower: It may obtain tactically as a special case from principles of instrumentality, expedience and service, that in order to gain popularity, desperate sycophantic social climbing as a follower among the popular and prominent, so often exploitative and abusive, may often humiliatingly backfire, resulting only in loss of all respect and self esteem. Instead. just the opposite, demonstration of leadership by leverage of whatever personal social standing if any, indeed by giving of ones heart, spending time and attention, showing interest and support for all too see, thus it may be possible by association, to confer greater popularity upon others. And anyone who can do that will always remain in high demand, ever increasing their own popularity from demonstration of precisely that ability to advance others. Everyone will want to stay in the good graces of such a one. Thence from that secure position, the most unpopular friends can be an asset rather than a liability. Rather than simply imperiling ones own standing, befriending even the most unpopular targets of bullying then presents the greatest challenge and opportunity to more spectacularly demonstrate your Menschlichkeit leadership superpower only for good.

    By contrast, criminals' are often known to treat their victims like criminals or undesirables. And such is typically the mentality of vigilantism. Abusers may often resort to victim blaming and even victim playing. False accusations and playing the victim, indeed whatever aspersions cast upon targets of abuse, serves not only to deflect and confuse the likely approbation of others, but also in Existential Validation to allay the bullies' own bad conscience and raging cognitive dissonance. This is why bullies may find themselves vulnerable to ongoing orchestrated public shaming for their misdeeds. In particular, bullies must be taken to task for their most flagrant hypocrisy. Indeed, a most bewildering tactic of shaming, shock, terror and the most damaging social bullying, is false accusation against the target of bullying of every abuse indeed so suddenly and relentlessly perpetrated upon the hapless target of bullying. For example, to rationalize the mot predatory well orchestrated organized gang stalking by accusations of stalking, or devious innuendos of sexual harassment may feature in actual sexual harassment. And of course, cockblocking, the proverbial foxes guarding the metaphorical hen house, is a time honored vigilante tactic of sly predatory exploitation, demonizing and driving out unwanted competition. For such is the Honor-Protection Racket.

    Adversative memetics comprises of ideas that compel their hosts to attack or sabotage competing ideas and/or those who hold them. Adversative replication may confer advantage in meme transmission for memes themselves encouraging hostility towards competing memes. Indeed, for "a moralist, who, generally speaking, has no conscience except the one he is at pains to produce for the use of others" [Joseph Conrad] may find tremendous self serving advantage in hypocrisy and the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, while exempting those who impose them. The fundamental types and tactics of bullying populating the bullying circle, consist, if not of violence out right or at least intimidation, then even well orchestrated harassment, bullying mimesis, scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, isolation, ostracism, protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse. by disruptive pranks, peer pressure and evil gossip towards isolation and ostracism.

    Beyond proselytizing, consistency, consensual validation and demonization to rationalize all manner of abuse, bullying memes employ what Aaron Lynch has dubbed the adversative mode of memetics, effective sabotage in of suppression against all dissent, the attacking and/or undermining opponents and competing thoughts. Because  of intimidation into silence, an adversative mode memplex is such as will be predatory upon competing memes, often without opposition or resistance. Indeed, a sufficient level of bullying and intimidation will suffice to silence and parallelize opposing culture significantly. Adversative memetics comprises of ideas that compel their hosts to attack or sabotage competing ideas and/or those who hold them. Adversative replication may confer advantage in meme transmission for memes themselves encouraging hostility towards competing memes.

    Transmitted and propagating ideas with corresponding behaviors are called: memes. The memetic vectorization of malicious gossip, is the propensity of malicious gossip to find its way to receptive audience while skirting the attention of those less credulous and more sympathetic or moral. This is important because malicious gossip is the medium with impunity, of highly organized and hateful mean spirited conspiracy so characteristic of typical adversative memetics. For, to paraphrase Sun Tzu, malicious gossip is like water, flowing to the lowest places, and avoiding the high moral ground. Or like an electric spark to excite the evil doer, passing between the readiest conductors, while avoiding the insulation of morality or credulity. Worse, traditions of disapproval towards gossip, often inspire calls for silence in order to stem said gossip and prevent spiritual contamination. Alas, to quote Edmund Burke: “All tyranny needs to gain a foothold is for people of good conscience to remain silent.”

    One standard strategy of bullies is simply to persistently propagate hate speech regarding the targeted person in order to incite hostility, abuse and even violence, on the part of any disturbed personalities or fanatics so eager for Existential Validation. Bullies can often be hard to identify and oppose due to their two-facedness, as well as the power connections they've established. Such bullies are devious manipulative consummate liars. And, often, it may even take low guile to thwart low guile. And therefore, as to the place of and the need for low guile, in the good fight, it does well to remember how George Bernard Shaw reported no pang of conscience what so ever, in pointing the fox hunters in entirely the wrong direction after the frightened quarry dashed by before his very eyes. And as much can be said of the righteous who gulled the Nazis at every opportunity to protect the persecuted. Even courageous Pacifism must draw a demarcation line from sheer spineless conflict aversion.

    Not long suppressed, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility. The name calling and innuendo of bullying typically denigrates the individual, attacking appearance as strange, unattractive or provocative, impugning upon sexuality as eager, inept, immoral, predatory or strange and deviant, while mocking the very luzerly suffering inflicted by bullying and all social isolation thereby exacerbated. In the words of Sonya Barnett at the very first SlutWalk in Toronto: “Enough of being told that we should be ashamed of ourselves, ashamed of our appearance, ashamed of our pleasure and ashamed of being victimized.” If only slut shaming closed minds came with closed mouths!

     

     

     

    When to hold your tongue: Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?

    “Empty vessels make the most sound.”  John Lydgate \
     
    “A half truth is a whole lie.”  Yiddish Proverb
     
    “Be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape calumny.”  Hamlet, Act 3 Scene 1
     
    “Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.”  Elbert Hubbard

    Free thought and expression are rightly to be prized, especially the candid and impersonal exchange of the most brutally honest criticism and even however controversial, but also the frivolous gossip that is such a part of human "primate grooming rituals" and consensual validation, the corroboration of reality by comparison of one's own perceptions and concerns with those of others, even anecdote so revelatory of character. Everyone gossips, but malicious gossip, in particular, has special conspiratorial and anticompetitive adversative mode of Memetics. And here is the rub. Because the most vulgar gossip partakes of the same ambiguity as teasing, that in good humor either are harmless (not to be taken seriously by anyone of sound judgment or good character mindful to the recognition and modification of distortions) and even caring and inclusive, but, just as with actually hostile teasing, in malicious evil gossip via any medium or in any context, slander against reputation, Cyber-libel, internationally ubiquitous or closer to home, all constitutes exclusion by means of such devilry as scheming, slippery and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, raising ugly passions, sowing confusion and instigating harassment outright, even violence.

    As the saying goes, let us strive, always, to take things in whatever spirit as intended: Indeed, even for gossip, there can always be higher caliber and greater substance in loftier intention attended upon with better sensitivity. Beyond mere empty idle gossip there is always the unburdening of oneself by crucially purposeful consultation in the resolution of personnel issues with others. But we must remain ever mindful of sliding into sheer gossip, guilty minded time consuming idle talk or rumor, especially as concerning the personal or private affairs of others, worst of all in vengeful hostility and reproach of perceived shortcomings, all behind another's back; typically stirring up strife, far from ever hoping to gaining insight and working things out. In the words of Arthur H. Vandenberg: "It is less important to redistribute wealth than it is to redistribute opportunity." But cronyistic backbiting, scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility undermine reputation and hence the quest for recognition, obscuring the true character and value of the target of bullying from public perception, assuring as a consequence, social isolation and powerless unmet needs, generally preventing redistribution of opportunity. Bullies often seek to pro-socially characterize the targeting of an individual for defamatory malicious gossip and backbiting as raising an alarm howsoever warning others in the community about said hapless individual presumably deemed undesirable in light of whatever slander or else by sheer mean spirited petty and picayune peevishness. Exactly thus, even in grade school, the rational for bullying may already evoke a sort of bush-league vigilantism. In truth, however, though it is no longer so easy to seize ones neighbors' property by accusing them of witchcraft, the must virulent slander and ostracism often comes from romantic rivals for the same romantic prospects, or those who have borrowed money from their hapless target, now reluctant to pay it back except in the currency of heaping ever fresh abuse!

    .com  

    In plot, "unity of action," Sequence and Logic, but according to the Zen, distinctly from dharma, dealing in morally neutral physical problems and classifications of causality, karma is the psychological and sociological causality pertaining to human interaction, actually neither so universal nor measurable as to qualify as an actual physical law, yet nevertheless, the highly consistent and observable tendency for good effects to result from good causes: skill, prudence and benevolence, and bad effects to result from bad causes: malice, incompetence and stupidity. A rational percept of compassionate responsibility grounded in foreseeable consequence, taken no less seriously in Judeo-Christian thinking. -In modern terms and context, that bullying is unsafe. And this is in no way limited to such abuse as violence and harassment outright, but applies to the entire range of underhanded covert relational hostility and even ordinary thoughtlessness, all profoundly karmic.

     

  • Negative and positive communication in social networks
  •  

    "Judge not lest ye be judged" [MATTHEW 7:1-5] is the famed scriptural admonition to those ever among us least fit to judge yet most eager to do so, not to silence those actually injured by wrongdoing, needing comfort and succor, at all knowing firsthand whereof they complain. For we all remember what the Good Book tells us about appearances (at least anyone who has ever channel surfed in on the climax of 'The Man With the X-Ray Eyes'): "If thine eye offends thee, pluck it out." - [MATTHEW 18:9] Indeed: In the words of Edgar Allen Poe: "Believe nothing you hear, and only half of that you see." For to begin with, it is the mind and not they eye that sees. And hearsay first traveling through the minds of however many others, isn't even the product of ones own individual thinking.

    A vicious standby of propaganda of the powerful and amoral, is first to create an information vacuum, a mystery needing explanation in the imagination of their public, and then to fill said information vacuum with any decidedly one sided account, no matter how incredible but effectively uncontested. And this is readily accomplished by whatever means of ostracism, isolating the target of bullying and defamation and robbing them of any voice by which to defend their reputation. Calumny is the swift and ever worsening result.

    Herodotus observed: "A man calumniated is doubly injured -- first by him who utters the calumny, and then by him who believes it." Any medium so vulnerably unguarded as the proverbial grapevine, is so easily subverited by power mad attention craving liars and instigators without scruple, no values of truth or justice, no sense of responsibility and not the slightest concern for the awful damage they bring about.

    A concise scriptural selection on evil gossip is further elaborated in The Mouth that Roared and the calumny of evil gossip, particularly as false witness received into bureaucratic due process, is testified to in FAMILY ABUSE!

    Prophet Muhammad said :“Do you know what backbiting is?” They said, God and His Messenger know best.” He then said, “It is to say something about your brother that he would dislike.” Someone asked him, “But what if what I say is true?” The Messenger of God said, “If what you say about him is true, you are backbiting him, but if it is not true then you have slandered him.” (Muslim)

    Backbiting (gheebah), then, means abuse, callous, deliberate harmful libel or defamation, even in mere mention behind the subjects back, in their absence, but of course, not neutral information, innocently intended. However, according to Islam, one who has suffered injustice seeking redress, is exempt, as is inquiry into pertinent information as to the reliability of others, pertaining to ones actual dealings with others, particularly with regard to outcomes of litigation and court rulings, all a legitimate inquiry of reputation, let alone the exchange of intelligence upon enemies actually presenting a clear and present danger. Backbiters are well advised to amend their ways and seek the forgiveness from the ones harmed. For backbiters are said to take upon themselves a thousand fold, whatever trifles and venial sins of those whom they have maligned and who are thereby cleansed thereof. And that makes sense, because one who, one way or another, effectively seeks vengeance or to pass judgment over such empty grudges in all disproportion and with no redeeming purpose, at the very least, certainly ought to forfeit the right to complain any further about it.

    “The jawbone of an ass is just as dangerous a weapon today as in Sampson's time.”  Richard Nixon

    Indeed, likewise, Confidentiality in Jewish Law and "OOPS! I SHOULDN'T SAY THIS... OR SHOULD I?" specify the distinct moral obligation neither to receive nor to transmit bad-mouthing for fear of the destructive and unclean fallout dust (la-ashon ha-rah), poisonous exhalations of second hand heresy, ever, except in such case of clear and present danger wherein the prudent moral obligation becomes actually to make and/or take heed of any warning altruistically motivated simply in order to actually guard against whatever genuine danger and harm. But an untrustworthy society tends exactly to the reverse, brutally enforcing modest silence but only regarding serious problems exactly by means of clamorous alarm over trifles and lies, as well attested in Deviant Women in Early Modern England.

    Leviticus 19:16 admonishes against deadly self serving self advancement by the circulation of slander by vigorous tale bearing that then only motivates the hearers to heartless idle bystander apathy and leave their neighbors, shunned, pariah, alone and falsely maligned without recourse, in a word: calumniated, in whatever circumstances or situations as unfold, to fend for themselves even for their very lives or those of others important to them, as connectivity to their world and every vital resource, comes apart at the seams, crashing down around them. In the words of St. Bernard: "Slander is a poison which kills charity, both in the slanderer and the one who listens."

     

    Bullying Online and Offline 

    I myself have found flamers and character assassins Online as Offline so irksome, tiresome and repetitive that, in order to save time I have finally simply compiled a stock answers to their distortions and accusations, into The Completely Inane and tiresome Ad Hominem FAQ for FoolQuest.com 

    But I am not the only one who can attest the matter is frequently far more serious and dangerous than that.

    The formerly distant and impersonal Internet may be encroaching and closing in, faster than we think. "Perpetrators of social ills like bullying or stalking tend to use whatever media are available." Now, even text messaging on mobile phones. And here is a  parody (I hope!) warning of the abuse of Online resources in the perpetuation of sinister cause.

    After all, there are already thriving communities of spite, not just cutting edge Web-tech in the dark service of ubiquitous Neo Nazis and various and sundry other legions of angry kooks, but forums of revenge, cyber-vandalism and, of course, just petty flaming. Not long suppressed, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility.

    Already for decades now on the Internet, flamers, short for for flaming assholes, have engaged in flaming, which is short for enflaming others with rage, that may consist of harassment, baiting, cyberstalking, disruption of forums, character defamation, malicious evil gossip, cyber-libel, slander against reputation, scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, like manipulative strangers with candy, the trollish exploitation of confidence, harassment and sheer ventilation of Sadism, internationally ubiquitous or closer to home. But take the survey.

    Prevailing guidelines for flaming, such as they are, scarcely constitute any embodiment of Critical Thinking, as flaming seeks to obstruct and subvert rational discourse of any kind. The mentality of flaming is iniquitous, in that being anti-critical, flaming does not seek to state, define or redress grievance or injustice reasonably or even press cogent criticism. Rather, the stated methodology of flamers is the highly subjective and flexible identification of unworthy classes of individuals, inferior beings, intrinsically deserving of abuse and provocation. People who can't control themselves try control others instead, which they often must strive to rationalize one way or another, as by the evaluation of the quality and worth of expression of others according to the flamer's highly subjective and self-indulgent criteria, in order to rationalize lashing out at will, according to the morally bankrupt historically Fascist ideology of true honesty achieved only by the abandonment of all Civility and decency. But, far from unflinching honesty, flaming is actually predicated upon aggravation via unrelenting topic irrelevancy, the determined intent of drowning out signal with noise making heat without light and tends to be rationalized by victim blaming, scapegoating and defamation, one way or another. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course they will resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail. To deny injustice and gloat about it, all in the same breath, flaming, in short, is the Online application of standard historically Nazi anarchic diversionary tactics, Sadistic persecution and self serving rationalizations thereof. 

    But flamers can be of any particular political alignment or none at all. Indeed, the logic of flamers, such as it is, may begin from their pointless taunting of such tempting targets as obnoxious flaming Neo Nazis, repressive religious Fundamentalists, charlatans, hustlers and USENET kooks. But then the field rapidly expands to become all encompassing so as to make anyone at all, fair game for flaming, at least in the twisted thinking of the flamers. Only so long as they can get away with it. 

    All of this is consistent with Anton Levay's fashionably depraved assertions of vengeance as any sort of a moral compass, that are actually immoral deception, having nothing to do with any simply amoral individual liberation and, indeed, can be nothing but a license to actout, omitting as they do any value of justice or proportion whatsoever. For all such is but the ongoing distortion of Nietzsche that began, historically, with his exploitative Nazi sister! Remember, Nietzsche, after all, despised Altruism and Persecution, equally, as Ecclesiastical vanity, Zen futile worldly attachment, snares and threats to autonomy. But the post-Nazi likes of notoriously Devil Worshiping Anton Levay, not only flamers, specifically, but bullies in general, often actually advance Sadomasochism as self realization, or at least on par with any other Hedonism. 

    After all, any success in manipulation of the target of flaming, any response at all, for whatever reason, indeed anything short of somehow or other successfully barring or driving the target of abuse away or driving them into silence one way or another, is considered by flamers to embody consent on the part of their target to further abuse, according to Anton LaVey's puerile and facile Satanist Sophistry and Apologetics for Sadomasochism that bald facedly equates predation and baiting with courtship between informed and desiring individuals.

    And by similar repulsive logic, often targets of bullying conditioned into passive resignation by the school authorities are then considered better adjusted, because, otherwise, if they still react, then they are thought to be bringing it upon themselves. But, of course, by contrast with any physical intimidation or attack etc. in Real Life Offline, flamers are quick to point out that Online with flaming, far less is at stake. However, this may be deceptive, as flaming may serve to brand the target for scheming and masterfully socially adept disruptive Relational Bullying, defamation, ostracism and further incitement to and co-validation of all manner of harassment and abuse, Online or Offline. 

    Nevertheless, no different than bullies in general, there remains the one thing alone that still stops flamers dead in their tracks. And that is Civility, manifest as the moral indignation and disapproval of bystanders (instead of the all to common apathy) against the sheer ugly discourtesy, as bad form and uncool. Or the disapproval may also be effective coming from an authority figure such as a forum Moderator. Indeed, Even though, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm, the spell of bystander apathy and social loafing can be broken by the example and assertive honesty of even a single Good Samaritan. But, otherwise, cowardice and apathy of the public or effective secrecy that conceals abuse or, indeed, anything at all less than staunch Civility at all, comes to the flamers, as to any other cliques of bullies, as tacit approval from society, thus enablement and impunity for abusers. Because, being devoid of actual conscience, heteronymous amoral sociopaths actually tend to be all the more mortified by miss stepping into simple faux pas. That is their weakness. 

    And all that is really needed for the introduction Civility into a culture, is a few plants in the crowd. A way of teaching in the field by demonstration. In turn leading to consensus building for moral suasion. The Clique Busters concept, Online or Offline, is about the covert engineering and orchestration of Civility and even the exposure of bullies and their cliques with intervention and counterpropaganda

     

     

     

    Character Assassination, covert relational hostility and manipulations in society

    After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences, reprisal, or even simply do harm. The lower are the standards of Critical Thinking and justice, the more indistinct, exaggerated and picayune may be the grudges held against the target of bullying in evil gossip. Not liking someone else's vibe, for little particular reason, is often all the self justification a belligerent bully ever needs, just so long as they are never called to account and expect to get away with it all, one way or another. There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you.

    Indeed, the mentality of bullyspeak, such as wherein the actingout of every petty animosity is discussed and encouraged as if that where the most reasonable thing on Earth! Within the dynamic of their cliques, the bullies, in their fragile Narcissism, co-validate in manipulating themselves away from Critical Thinking and empathy, and to condition people, unconsciously, to become uneasy in the presence of a target of bullying that they seek to ostracize, bullies will haunt their prey, raising tension in the vicinity every time their hapless quarry is ever present. Such instigation is a manipulation of herd instinct which is part of a clique's standard Affinity Scam as well as Persecutor-Rescuer headgames.

    But more than this, there is always the bully's repertoire of dirty tricks: Deviously, the deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept Relational Bully casts a chilling effect, the threatening pall of humiliation to intimidate others from connecting with one another, typically separating the targets of isolation by exclusion from all others and especially the targets of isolation and exploitation within the peer group, and to prevent them from comparing notes and helping one another in standing up to and ever overcoming the bullies. And, in addition, by harassment of the target of bullying, he or she can be made so upset or frightened as to seem vaguely threatening to others who are kept in the dark and out of context. That is another reason why bullies often resort to sly practical jokes that they hope will not be perceived by apathetic bystanders and social loafers.  

    Lastly, the gulf which is cultivated by deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, peer pressure, ostracism, dehumanizing Character Assassination and bigotry, exacerbates isolating and paralytic tension which thus becomes self validating. Of course, ridicule and abuse against the underdog are enough to encourage imitation, unless, instead of prevailing apathetic social loafing, such provoke immediate bystander or authoritative honest outrage.

    Cult-like cliques do not serve merely isolate their own membership within. Rather, cliquish cronyism seeks control of connection between others entirely so that all others must curry their favor, tribute which they must be systematically refused. Even beyond ostracism against and social isolation of any individual target of bullying most particularly, deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility and abuse of power often more generally employs manipulative intimidation divisively in order to keep other people or even groups or classes of people, all separate from on another, in ongoing sabotage, under any pretext or taboo, undermining competing social cohesion outside the oppressive dominant clique. Therefore CliqueBusters must also network and collaborate in order to monitor covert relational hostility and provide intentional social context and backchannels in order actually even to orchestrate contact and communication, not only for targets ofdeviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, but for everyone else as well, in order systematically to mend all connection and outreach continually undermined by relentless Relational Bullies.

     
     
    Does the devious practice of covert relational hostility fall within freedom of association? 
    CERTAINLY NOT! 

    The entire point of covert relational hostility is ambient or stealth abuse to obstruct, subvert and misdirect consenting association. Relational Bullying is not an expression of the bully's freedom of association. What a pernicious lie to ever suggest that it ever could be! Rather, covert relational hostility intentionally robs the target of their freedom of association, thereby making very broad adverse impact. 

    "The rain it raineth every day
    Upon the just and unjust fella
    But more upon the just, because
    The unjust has the just's umbrella"

    There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you. Putting someone at a comparatively unfair disadvantage, or by unfair means, is robbing them. Woody Allen said that “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” But not for targeted individuals of serial covert relational hostility and ostracism. It's worse than invisibility!  The social technology of Clique Busters proactively aims at the inception of a procedure that will motivate exposure of the truth and fan the flames of social and individual justice.

    A good test for the identification of a clique of bullies is to persist in asking for explanation of their hostility in terms of objective reality and fairness. To insist to know what actually happened, and how and in what sense did their target ever wronged them. If the questioner is simply brushed off or scorned, then the bullies have been identified. However, by the same token, the questioning skeptic is endangered, exposed to the bullies. 

    But to actually learn the whole truth, another more devious approach is indicated:
    When stroked, these braggarts will spill their guts uncontrollably, of all they'd never admit under any duress. So desperate are they for Existential Validation. All that is required is feigned Sadistic approval! Indeed, questioning skeptics may even that easily restore their safety and anonymity, by simply pretending to change sides! 

    Indeed, in order to avoid giving cues and contaminating the results, employ an emotionally loaded semi-coherent incomplete sentence as a projective test, just such as may be contrived to illicit response to exactly such ambiguous stimuli. Then humor the subject, feigning enthusiastic agreement to reinforce whatever answer as tumbles forth in response.

    The Clique Busters Zen, the moral bottom line, is, if you came upon abuse of whatever sort, the act, preparation, or the conspiracy, might you ever hide and listen, to warn the intended victim or even to bear witness publicly and in protest? Might you ever go so far as to humor the wrong doers just to pump them for details by which to implicate themselves? And would you ever plan on doing any of this sort of thing deliberately? -Especially if you could rely upon good logistical support...

    And, of course, the bullies' targets must also be contacted and interviewed, then warned about the bullies' evil plans. Not to mention anyone else involved or just witnesses bystanding.

     
    Psychological warfare and covert relational hostility via organized orchestrated harassment
     
    In peer pressure, hesitancy and doubt elicited along with cognitive dissonance and bystander apathy via calumny together with actual fear of reprisal, none dare be seen responding or offering comfort to a target of bullying in palpable distress, neglected for long durations. Few even look upon, make eye contact, converse with, or spares so much as a nod and a smile. However defeated and withdrawn, finally at all howsoever rising in whatever extremes protest against more overt bullying, mistreatment and abuse, may be the only means to garner attention. Sometimes the individuals social needs are at all successfully met, even against all odds, but mostly they are thwarted by unrelenting  covert relational hostility. The target of bullying never knows what to expect in such an increasingly hostile social environment. As the bullies transition through mounting stages of hostility, the target of bullying may eventually find themselves finally banned or barred outright from whichever community. Social contacts at all that remain may distance themselves, or become emotionally unavailable because of depression, illness, or even addiction problems.
    Connection and attachment require comfort for vulnerability and focus. Therefore covert Relational Bullies slyly cultivate discomfort and disruption, in order to exclude and isolate targets of bullying. But just as such bullying is tightly orchestrated, likewise exposure and denunciation against them can likewise be orchestrated. And by such example, people can be drawn in to participate, educated to follow suit, thereby making such bullyproofing customary, raising better functional expectations and helping to inoculate a social circle with civility against bullying. Otherwise, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility.

    Any need whatsoever of maintaining at all plausible appearances and rationalizations will tend to rule out the more overt mimesis of bullying in favor of whatever ambient or stealth abuse secretly or at least deniably. All mature and functional attachments of social relationship under autonomy are ethical, being predicated upon trust and fulfillment of such expectations, lack or abrogation whereof creating distance, even loathing and avoidance, or else ambivalence, mistrust and dysfunction, indeed if not amoral sociopathy outright, then the shattered confidence and compensations thereto of heteronomy. Weak attachment makes for weak conscience. Thus heteronymous deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility and even cult-like fair game tactics working to to undermine those attachments in society, thereby conspire with impunity by means of social exclusion, shunning and mobbing, to harm and endanger the target of exactly such serial bullying. Often protected by abuse of power curried well in advance and usually also coordinated together with a wider disinformation campaign of damaging malicious gossip, an organized campaign of harassment is organized by cliques of amoral sociopathic serial bullies, and deviously orchestrated against the target of bullying. Individual harassment episodes involving a handful of participants are carefully planned and arranged for the isolated and bewildered target of bullying to experience in a social environment thereby turned palpably hostile and frightening. Ambiguous remarks overheard and trivial momentary acts of petty hostility seem not only deniable, but easy even for the target to overlook, except for the defamation and ostracism so menacingly foreshadowed.

    For whenever possible, and in whatever social context, cliques of bullies will consistently strive to pressure and estrange all others from the target of bullying. Not only are current friends and acquaintances pressured, but all potential new connections are obstructed or misdirected under any pretexts or by whatever defamation, disruptive dirty tricks ofdeviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, intimidation and intrigues of abuse of power. After all, to be effective, manipulatively intimidating malicious gossip does not need to convince, but only to cast doubt and foment hesitation, in order successfully to isolate any target of all such devious bullying.

    Delusions of reference or just hyper vigilant sensitization can make even random proximate events seem to be directly related to the perceiver, as for example it may seem as if people are talking about you specifically, let alone anything so dramatic, fancifully surreal as special personal messages communicated to you personally, through the TV, radio, or other media. Over compensation may take the form of sweet reason, self doubt, denial and dismissal as disturbing misperception and strange coincidence that which later turns out otherwise, when the proverbial second shoe metaphorically drops. The real question may be: Are you paranoid enough?

    Surveillance for effective intelligence gathering should be undetected by the target of observation. But to the contrary, merely for purposes of threatening and provocative psychological harassment, surveillance presence will be made always vaguely palpable. When anyone could be watching you, it may easily come to seem like everyone is watching you. And the stress will be cumulative. Fair game gaslighting is typically employed in order to menace, condition and sensitize the target of bullying to certain cues that can be more readily employed to elicit stressful and maddening hyper vigilance in the hapless target of bullying, to make them seem all the more haunted and  undesirable, even in moments or upon occasions when in actuality only a small number of the bullies or unwitting proxies and utter tools are at all available within the harassment perimeter of the target of bullying for the ambient or stealth abuse that is organized gang stalking, and therefore there is no way for the target thereof to know how deeply community based or not.

    It is important to remain aware of one’s surroundings in dangerous situations and to intimidate and keep at bay the enemy. Homo sapiens, like any other animal, when alarmed by external stimuli, will freeze up in fight, autonomicly. Freezing up will alternate with scanning. Scanning is an alert posture in a fight/flight situation that nay feature sideways swaying of the head and anterior part of the body. This brings parallax, revealing possible threats by shifting the position of foreground features relative to the background. A tactic of bullying is a repertoire of fair game tactics, blatant and devious, to threaten and alarm the target of bullying, thereby eliciting wariness. This is a disruptive tactic or covert relational hostility, undermining social interaction between the target of bullying and anyone else by making the target of bullying seem nervous, haunted, even disreputable or socially inept. And of course, bullies are typically nuance vigilantes. Keeping one’s cool while being bullied and gaslighted is highly dystressful and distracting. Bullies routinely exploit all restraint showed by targets of bullying. 

          Gang Stalking: Psychological Targeting in a Group Setting

      organized gang stalking: "bullying on steroids"
     Devious clique diva bully types and tactics populating the bullying circle, are in the use of a different kind of mean maneuvers:
           Parenting solutions for girlish deviously scheming and masterfully slippery and socially adept covert relational hostility.
     Are You Crazy, or Are You Being Gang Stalked?  

    Organized gang stalking is a particular aspect of protractedly escalating syndromes of shunning and mobbing, as by inclusion of covert pursuit and surveillance of a target even while in motion. Modes of gang stalking, multiple stalking, or group stalking, shadowing and menacing include ongoing covert relational hostility towards social isolation of the target unawares, or escalation of psychological warfare into fair game gaslighting. The appellation predatory gang stalking obtains tautologically. Vigilante gang stalking, in petty spite or mounting hysteria, obtains given portrayal of the target as howsoever trivially or monstrously undesirable, lending the persecution thereof thereby a luster and fraudulently self justifying Existential Validation as somehow or other even noble pro-social. Indeed, cause stalking as indeed seen throughout history, obtains in so far as implicit or explicit ideology or politics ever motivates and/or rationalizes any such active hostility, often branding their targets as whatever sort of infidel or deviant.

    In whatever particular locations or social context, or even as has. as alleged, been so notoriously captured on video, actually out at large in our neighborhoods on the streets and in public places, depending only, quite literally, how far the perpetrators are actually willing to go, gang stalking may often consist in covert pursuit and surveillance of a target unawares, engaging in slippery and deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility and ostracism by sudden shock and intimation of all bystanders into stunned apathy via whatever threatening abuse of power (physical threat, authority, social standing, whatever), peer pressure and malicious gossip, in order all thereby to socially isolate their target, even while in motion, After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm.  But then the objective of escalating harassment becoming more brazen, of shadowing and menacing psychological warfare, fair game gaslighting and ambient or stealth abuse in a hostile social environment, is to make the target fearfully and painfully aware they are singled out, completely alone, and constantly vulnerable, via a systematic erosion of personal rights and a constant aggressive campaign in a joint effort to chip away at a targets' emotional wellbeing. -The Sadistic purpose being to control, isolate, intimidate, traumatize, depower, and ultimately destroy a defenseless isolated individual.

    Often few outside the ring of bullying perpetrators and their closest enablers may even
    know about the complex abuse and unmerited attention being inflicted upon the targeted individual. Devious surreptitious bullies make sure that by mounting paranoid sensation and finally smug brazen exhibition, the target ends up left without any doubt, knowing full well that they are being watched and harassed, But the target is left with little or no evidence to share with others. Gang stalking is threatening behavior. Many people can be lied to about the target or even coerced into helping to hurt and harm a target psychologically, leavening the target in a poor position ever to trust and reach out to others.

    A most alarming sign of rising Fascism, is when Federal law enforcement in the most misguidedly
    Inductivist search for suspicious activity, reaches out to professional security or even just private citizens, for angry inept assistance in surveillance that becomes foreboding and harassing. Gang stalking has also been known to be locally community based, even with police involvement.  

    "Savvy law enforcement types realized that under the community policing rubric, cops, community groups, local companies, private foundations, citizen informants and federal agencies could form alliances without causing public outcry."

    Covert Action Quarterly, summer 1997.

    But all too pandemicly, organized predatory gang stalking, the new hate crime, is believed to be often just the work of often bored unemployed thugly vigilante cop wannabes. Untrained and poorly educated rent-a-cops, even ever lurking and stalking room temperature IQ hotel security can be such utter tools and make themselves such eager proxies to the serial bullying of ambient or stealth abusers. Even the lowest level of security work, in sheer delusional hubris, is manifest in the machinations of deranged serial bullies doing volunteer security at conventions and events, so often throwing their weight around in chronically shadowing and menacing surveillance and harassment of vulnerable and opportune targets of bullying who have obviously done no wrong. But group stalking is hardly limited to security work. Just for example, any amoral violent sociopath can call upon their equally amoral sociopathic buddies and cronies for menacing surveillance in order to keep tabs upon and intimidate a terrified battered spouse. And any bullies can slink about and follow their target around the school yard, whispering malicious gossip and exerting exclusionary peer pressure right there behind their hapless target's back. Soon the abuse escalates. Hypocritical self-serving bullies after all, come from all walks of life and most are everyday normal looking people maintaining a respectable public image and in order by means of whatever malicious gossip, backbiting, gross slander or petty victim blaming especially for consumption within their most immediate circles, to occupy a somehow or other implicitly even bush league vigilante-like pro-social Existentially Validating moral high ground even whilst engaged in ambient or stealth abuse and debilitating psychological warfare against their targets with complete impunity and unbeknownst to or poorly understood by the general public at large. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail.

    David Lawson's landmark Investigation Into Organized Stalking  is evaluated by Stop Organized Stalking - Information, a reasonable seeming effort at sensemaking in overview of the continuum of serial bullying into outright multi-stalking.

     

    The madness of reality interplaying with the rationales of delusion
    Sifting out the germ of truth from amid the chaff of the unlikely and far fetched

    The range of abuse and exploitation herein discoursed upon are perpetual and ubiquitous. And evidence thereof must remain Empirical. Therefore flagrant denial of ever having witnessed or heard tell, likewise remains possible, however unlikely. That is why this document strives so to render a certain range of often ridiculed and seemingly extreme claims plausible and as tawdry common place as they actually are. It's not a matter of whether one is paranoid, but whether one is paranoid enough! For sweet reason is so oft ending in shock and disappointment. The world is full of bad people because there may even be far fewer truly bad people than at all benign, yet the power and evil of even so few utterly bad people expands to fill our lives, doing harm and demanding accommodation to so continue!

    Is gang stalking then a real phenomena? In answer by way of illustrative analogy: King Arthur may be mythical and yet England endures. Likewise. conspiracism is delusional, but gang stalking as a mode of bullying and even criminal harassment, often under any outrageous pretext of vigilante rationalization, is very real indeed. -Just not organized on the improbable scale and pervasively super secret deep state authority claimed, nay veritably demanded, by crank conspiracy theorists. But does it need to be before we respond seriously?

    No one denies the reality of individual stalking, indeed, serial stalking, repeatedly and persistently, and not just upon single unrepeated occasions. No one denies that occasionally as might arise, groups of people ever follow others in a manner howsoever secretive, stealthy and/or menacingly hostile. Can it truly be beyond credence that such group or collective activity as likewise to follow others in any howsoever secretive, stealthy and/or menacingly hostile manner, but to do it together with others, might ever be ongoing much as with serial stalking by lone individuals? Only specific cases and extreme claims regarding the phenomena of group or multiple stalking may at all seriously invite skeptical scrutiny. Cynical willful naivety of blanket denial, implicit or explicit, is just puerile and deserves no serious consideration.

    The leading cause for feelings of persecution remains actual persecution. The hounded and harried, the shunned and outcast, often progressively do actually begin to seem haunted and disreputable. To begin with there is such widespread denial regarding bullying generally. People will tend to believe you if you tell them you've been assaulted and robbed in the street, but often become the more credulous regarding accounts of mean spirited and devious harassment. It doesn't help credibility of the victimized either, when the symptoms of nervous dystress from severe and protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, let alone more brazen and overt harassment, even actual death threats, may even begin to terrifyingly but misleadingly mimic those of poison.

    Indeed, the very real paranoid experience of sensitization from devious and crazy-making serial bullying, is an effect of protracted psychological warfare unto hyper vigilance, from being conditioned to alarm from any trivial sign or stimuli such that might also happen entirely at random and with no real significance. Sensitization accrues nagging self doubt because of false alarms on the one hand, or overcompensation and disbelief of an intuition over anything innocent seeming that later turns out to be even possibly of real covert harassment and danger after all on the other.

    For another matter, no one likes to be messed with in their own home. Harassing and threatening crank phone calls are best dealt with by using any simple answering machine to screen calls. Another common complaint is of ones personal possessions being moved about in one's absence. Personally, I found just such circumstances, especially pilfering and open or unlocked doors and windows, all vastly improved, once the property manager finally replaced problem tenants and unreliable help. Up until then, I was chronically invalidated by the blaming of my own untidy housekeeping and absent mindedness. But I only found myself all the more conditioned into untidiness, because that became the only unconscious strategy to hide and protect my possessions. I learned or was conditioned that tidying only resulted in trespass and pilfering, doors found standing open and more of my possessions gone missing. Alas, along with neighbor bullying, various and far worse exploitation within ones own living situation, are hardly uncommon.

    Moreover, there are also those who report even in all candor, and with none of the angry accusatory intellectual dishonesty typical of conspiracism, the unlikely seeming and unsettling paranoid experience of palpable hostility from entirely different gang stalkers, following them around everywhere they go, even in traveling between different cities and continents! Is all of this then anything more that delusional metaphor for extreme alienation, or have they just become hyper vigilant and sensitized, indeed perhaps even so palpably nervous that they make even random strangers likewise at all perceptibly a little nervous in turn?

    People are strange when you're a stranger
    Faces look ugly when you're alone
    Women seem wicked when you're unwanted
    Streets are uneven when you're down

    When you're strange
    Faces come out of the rain
    When you're strange
    No one remembers your name

    When you're strange

     

    'People are Strange' Jim Morrison, The Doors

    Baffled sufferers may even be given due credit even for sincerely wanting to know what's actually going on. Nevertheless, it is not even clear if such astonishing accounts are rationalizingly suggestive of conspiracism or else vaguely and antirationally of some or other even quasi-mystical synchronicity or the supernatural even simply to blame it all on demons! In any case, the most manifestly unlikely accounts and scenarios are often exploited in order to undermine the credibility even of far more real, legitimate and obviously serious concerns.

    If such accounts of mysterious palpable hostility and sly pursuit from different complete strangers, even in international travel, are taken to represent the most conceivably extreme claim on the one end, then the other extreme would be utter denial that anyone ever stalks and harasses anyone else in any way whatsoever, let alone in any sort of collusion at all, or constantly against the same persons. And no one wants to actually come out and take the latter position, much as some scoundrels and cowards might even imply it. And so it follows, reasonably, that the truth lies anywhere in-between. The only insight that bullying awareness might offer, is that discrimination, which is the name given to persecution by type or classification of person, is only one among so many common motivation for bullying in any of its tactics and manifestations. Therefore, no, one needn't be perceived as Untouchable or Deviant, let alone howsoever dangerous or deserving, in order ever to pick up an unwontedly malignant tail! It's just intimidation and ostracism. Indeed, of course, all typically hypocritical wannabe vigilante tough talk notwithstanding, anyone truly frightening and dangerous will seldom find themselves so provoked. 

    .com  

    Just as more recently with the ongoing denial that single lone maladjusted serial stalkers might ever even conceivably flock together and gang up to cooperate in multi-stalking, the standard modes of obfuscation in truth suppression of the reality of bullying to begin with, have been the myth of the lone maladjusted physical bully likewise in denial of the very concept of bullying as a social phenomena with the insistence that cliques only present a problem for pathetic approval seekers desperate to gain entry thereto in high school. And these blithe and blatant lies went unchallenged because of the humiliation and denial never daring admit to being or ever having been unpopular and bullied. But the closeted shame and stigma for targets of bullying has abated, and the truth is out. Likewise the sly and malignant covert relational hostility and fair game gaslighting psychological warfare of shunning and mobbing even of a hapless and unsuspecting target while at all on the move, orchestrated harassment that is accomplished via the destructive social reality of howsoever community based or infesting and even well organized multi-stalking, is steadily coming to light no less.

    And yet there remain two principle kneejerks of abusive flaming and denial in truth suppression online regarding organized gang stalking specifically: The first is denunciation of the very topic of organized gang stalking as even implicitly intrinsically paranoid crank conspiracy theory, and the second is the very opposite, virulent Ad Hominem against any attempt whatsoever to discuss the very real and disturbing sociological phenomena of organized gang stalking, community mobbing or cause stalking among other related modes of bullying, except in context of fantastical Tabloid Weird machinations of super secret conspiracy and shadow government.

    Exactly such fantastical denial regarding organized gang stalking that employs paranoid crank conspiracy theory, operates by the following mechanisms: Much as pseudoscientific cranks deny that the pyramids, for example, could ever have been constructed without the technology of ancient extraterrestrial astronauts, likewise the conspiracy theorists adamantly deny that gang stalking is possible without super secret exotic technology under direct supervision from vast powers, cabals and shadow government, even though in reality, it's not actually all that complicated or resource intensive: To repeat the previous examples, any amoral violent sociopath can call upon their equally amoral sociopathic buddies and cronies for menacing surveillance in order to keep tabs upon and intimidate a terrified battered spouse, and any bullies can slink about and follow their target around the school yard, whispering malicious gossip and exerting exclusionary peer pressure right there behind their hapless target's back. Soon the abuse escalates. And exactly such extremely damaging covert relational hostility propagates unchecked throughout every walk of life. Nor is it much of a secret how the powerful and influential can and do incite all manner even at very least, of the most far reaching and intensive organized orchestrated harassment against whistleblowers, dissidents and others. Leave us not forget, also, extortion and terror or organized crime, McCarthyist blacklisting and cult harassment. So exactly what is there left to deny? 

    Another vexing practice typically damaging to the credibility of complaints against far more serious and dangerous harassment, is dissemination of all manner of bogus misleading information and pseudoscience, including, also, obsession upon, as reported, all manner of the most dumfounding incidental and ordinary observation and sightings, along with the most juvenile and trivial street theatre, even such that might almost be the artistry of perfectly well meaning flash mobs, perhaps were it not (as reported) for the chronic repetition!

    But the delusional conspiracy theory accomplishes two things for the believer: Whereas constant harassment and social isolation understandably bring about feelings of helpless inadequacy, and the already mentally unbalanced are prime vulnerable targets of bullying, the imaginary drama of enmity with vast unseen powers not only matches the vague and helpless sensation of persecution looming so large from quarters unknown and unseen, but at the same time promotes a grandiose sense of personal significance in compensation for the insignificance of helpless abuse unknown and without recourse. Indeed, precisely by conjuring such an overwhelming and intangible enemy, conspiracy theory promotes passive inaction and relieves the distress of daunting and frustrated responsibility to active resistance, but only deepening anxiety, depression, and either increasing insular hostility and denial or else frank and adamant expression of helpless despair, in the long run.

    Indeed, the sole approved counter offensive strategy of the delusional believers, is consciousness raising by flooding online forums; in other words: Endless co-validation and proselytizing. They refuse to organize for purposes of investigation or mounting resistance, for fear of infiltration by perpetrators! Indeed, apparently some are being bilked by confidence tricksters, Typically, the conspiracists also shun any very suggestion of acquiring, either by recruitment, education or experience, the skill sets for human tights advocacy and lobbying. And  of course the conspiracists blame the pervasive global conspiracy for their ineffectuality, never their own inadequacy, insularity, learned helplessness, paranoia and decidedly limited repertoire.

    But worst of all, often discriminatory and scapegoating paranoid crank conspiracy theory no matter how fantastical, has also always served as a handy propaganda platform for hate speech, scapegoating and victim blaming such as even to inspire organized gang stalking, cause stalking and vigilante stalking, in the first place, if not pogrom and mayhem outright. Is it a coincidence, then, that the lunatic fringe likely most active in vigilante cause stalking, also works so hard to encourage the association of the very concept of organized gang stalking so indelibly with the entire panoply of hard to swallow unwieldy grandiose crank conspiracy theory? Is it entirely unintentional how the former thereby so discredits the latter? Are just such outrageous claims actually "poison pills" of manufactured propaganda from would be insurgents, scheming to divide and conquer the masses over absurd contentions, so that we won't unite in confronting actual dangers? As Glen Beck likes to say: I'm just raising questions... !

    Overt rudeness and nastiness, even more subtle hostile social environment, are all indeed the very least of the extent of serial bullying. In mobbing as observed in animal communities, conspiratorial deliberate planning thereof must be deemed impossible. And similar behavior is observed in human society as well. But in human society there can also be deliberation. That's hardly uncommon. Indeed, the awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail. Still, perhaps to assert that there is planning and conspiracy may ever remain explanatorily unnecessary, and to whatever extent, serial bullying in society might nevertheless be apprehended as a memetic propagation of habitual spontaneous and unthinking cruelty, yet still highly organized. Indeed, even preparatory activity might be described, if not adequately explained, Behaviorally, rather than Cognitively. But therefore, actual additional scheming by any standard, only thrives and abounds. It remains an absurd denial to insist that bullies do not forge relationships, organize and cooperate in serial bullying. Indeed, for that matter, bullying is often institutional, bringing to bear the authority thereof in abuse of power.  

    Organized gang stalking remains, after all, a pervasive behavior socially, a mode of bullying and abuse of power relationships that is so often one way or another community based and historically a notorious feature of rising fascism. And along with secretive corruption, all manner of physical and psychological violence routinely figures into extortion by organized crime. In truth, however, conspiracy begins close to home. Bullies and thugs cooperate and network most readily and capably in isolating and victimizing targeted individuals. They don't need any sort of a formal syndicate.

     

     What, yet another crackpot paranoid conspiracy theory?

        What are conspiracy theories?

    A conspiracy theory is any explanation of any particular outcome or circumstances as resultant from some or other concealed and clandestine plot by a secret group or alliance rather than any individual or isolated event even despite all transpired superficial appearances. Indeed people in power have been all too frequently been discovered to do evil out from the public view. But the term: conspiracy theory designates a paranoid worldview endeavoring to explain the bulk of known history and current events by a narrative of the unknown and unlikely, of vast secret pervasive shadowy conspiracy behind the scenes. But in reality, the difficulty of keeping a conspiracy actually secret increases exponentially with each additional member. And besides, so much of the most brazen and vast criminal conspiracy, right out in the open, succeeds all the time in public affairs. Indeed, they often actually publish their plans!

    Crank conspiracy theorists are often first degree pipedreaming do-nothings and a force for inaction at best, angrily dismissing the importance of all other problems except for those that they link to whatever mythical pervasive secret conspiracy, demonizing all rational skepticism and adamantly rejecting any action  agenda beyond lambasting unbelievers and preaching to the choir. Or else at worst, crackpot paranoid conspiracy theorists are dangerous hate criminals and propagandists. For the histories of persecution and conspiracism remain inextricable. What is even meant by the very term: conspiracy theory? And as an article of critical preference, how exactly are crackpot conspiracy theories so bereft of all credibility? The Epistemological and Methodological question is of the demarcation of extraordinary claims demanding progressively stronger and more extraordinary scientific and journalistic evidentiary support, let alone hypotheses that are outright untestable, unfalsifiable in very principle.

    But wait: When indeed, if three felons cooperate in robbing a gas station, don't we assume that they planned it together, in other words: that they conspired? Or must we suppose that they all converged simultaneously, masked and guns in hand, by sheer coincidence, and only then spontaneously decided that they might as well cooperate? Of course not. Indeed, by contrast with all such common sense of the common place, an important feature of crank conspiracy theory proper, remains any far greater nigh religious leap of faith in explanation of the known in terms of the unknown or at least more uncommon or ever grander and more unlikely. Crackpot paranoid conspiracy theories strain credibility and credulity in their tendencies to posit impractically pervasive and deep secrecy together with consummate competence in the exercise of power, seizing the reigns of destiny from deep within the shadows behind the backdrop whereupon the spectacle of our empty lives is staged for us. 

    Whereas in truth, the actual corruption of tacit conspiracy so powerfully motivated by vested interest which is so difficult to curtail, ultimately only follows the path of least resistance. It is said that two can keep a secret if one of them is dead. So, how many are supposed to be involved in vast secret pervasive conspiracies? When has the government ever actually been slick enough to orchestrate much of anything very well? And what need of such convoluted secrecy, when, brazen and unaccountable, with complete impunity, the powerful and privileged are always peeing on our collective leg and telling us it's raining? Actual conspiracy grows ever more blatant!

    Although, sometimes it is the dilettante bored and powerful themselves who dabble in playing out crackpot conspiracy theory fantasy, indeed, as with the notorious Skull and Bones Society, gaudy privileged frat boy rituals of exclusivity and conspiracy may even serve only to glamorize precisely such tawdry reality of the interchangeably spineless and effete, behind a far more cool and thrillingly naughty and arcane fantasy. But surely, if such as the Skull and Bones Society never existed, nothing would really be any different. For that matter, if the notoriously elite and secretive Bilderberg conference where canceled one year, humdrum business as usual would simply continue via email. Competent management at all sustains our world. Real leadership is even more scarce.

    By the same token, exploitation and abuse as an open secret in any given culture, is another matter entirely than outlandish conspiracy theory. Examples include discrimination which may indeed manifest as bullying targeted against some class of individuals, organized crime and, yes: defamation and bullying also including along with deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, isolation, ostracism, protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse, such measures of harassment typical of vigilantism as organized gang stalking among modes of bullying, actually not all that complicated. For that matter, vigilantism itself is little secret either any more than, smug and disingenuous denials aside, bullying most generally. -All most unlike the explanatorily inelegant and inevident mythic tendrils of deep Byzantine conspiracies, nigh unmanageable and quite unnecessary for the powerful and brazen. Purportedly omnipresent and omniscient electronic surveillance is scarcely necessary for mounting hyper vigilant sensitization to even the most petty psychological warfare in its mysterious intermittence, simply to feel that way.
     
    Although, of course, governmental and corporate powers and even intelligence agencies have certainly been known to involve themselves in the instigation and even orchestrating of all manner of harassment and far worse, against whistleblowers and dissidents among others. Indeed,  Such orchestrated harassment as community based organized gang stalking, has a long history as a tool of political oppression whenever society swings towards Totalitarianism. The cult harassment and fair game tactics most notorious of The Church of Scientology also near mention. And But would any such harassment and defamation tactics be so damn easy and convenient in application criminal and sociopolitical oppression, if bullying weren't so rampantly out of control in veritably every sphere of life to begin with? Perhaps for a safer and saner world, autonomy and civility must begin closer to home. Perhaps the first evil powers that must be routed out, are merely the most insignificant petty abusers of power conferring impunity upon bullying. When we no longer so heteronymously tolerate their ilk, then perhaps we might also then break the habit of enduring any greater and deadlier tyranny and folly of public life, commerce and even of the criminal underworld as well.

    Exploitative emotional abuse is often observed and understood in the context of interpersonal relationships and life within society. But under whatever pretext, the criminally malignant and predatory manipulation and coercion that is bullying, thrusts exploitative emotional abuse upon others against their will entirely, even outside any bounds of ongoing relationship. Bullying is Sadistic enmity and intrinsically rapine, whether by over violence or by whatever various other means and tactics of sly intrusion, an entirely unwanted involuntary relationship on the part of the target of bullying and destructive thereto. Although, exploitative abusive relationships and social orders are also typically part of the whole picture. Bullying sends the message to accommodate abuse and exploitation, or else come under bullying attack completely. People who can't control themselves try control others instead, and frequently learn how to get away with it. Bullies force the people around them to accommodate the bullies own comfort and rationalizations.

     

     

    Clique Busters is the concept of a conspiracy of decency:
    Clique Busters is nothing other than how decent individuals in a truly civil society would respond to bullying.

    To befriend the targets of harassment who need allies and also the targets being isolated by scheming and masterfully socially adept Relational Bullies, to organize response and openly scold, mock, heckle, thwart, kill-joy, and frustrate the bullies responsible and/or to covertly misdirect the bullies, even just to talk about what is going and what can and should be done about it with others at large in order best to raise outrage.

    Bullies are a cliquish and cowardly lot!In the words of Benjamin Disraeli: “Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.” Courage is indeed the inner fire of determination and conviction only given the opportunity, howsoever to confront even a dangerous and more powerful foe, such as a clique of bullies opportunistically preying upon howsoever the weaker. For bullying is full of devious and cowardly bluster and evasion, quickly intimidated and smoke quickly dissipated once the advantage turns or in the face of possible damaging exposure and liability. Likewise, the hysterically jealousy, lying, name-calling propaganda defamation and damaging innuendo leveled against scapegoats, potential romantic competitors, and other targets of bullying, and by which all such are marked for covert relational hostility and abuse, malicious gossip manufactured and proffered in Existential Validation of bullying, indeed is all smoke, dark narrative void of substance, morally, logically and Epistemologically, except for well practiced and coordinated manipulative threat into cognitive dissonance.

    At any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. But the spell of social loafing and bystander apathy can actually be broken by the example and assertive honesty of even a single Good Samaritan, subverting the depraved mimesis of the bullies, and no less dramatically. -Which is actually important so that intervention is not simply by resented, in their dispirited amoral idle boredom, by the bystander audience as anticlimactic spoilsport and killjoy, but instead actually received and appreciated as a stirring appeal to participation in the uplifting renewal of civility reaffirmed. Bullies are a cliquish and cowardly lot!

    Also to communicate, strategize and prepare to foil bullies, whenever malicious gossip reveals behind itself, mean spirited conspiracy.

    Indeed, because the forces of good are so thinly spread, the
    Clique Busters must actually go out looking for the opportunity, no less than do the bullies themselves. Clique Busters will be proactive, answering calls for help, and even reaching out to those in need unasked.

    And such intervention constitutes vigilantism only as do all random or not so random acts of kindness. -Vigilantism merely in mimesis.

    The low guile of
    Clique Busters, intelligence gathering, clique infiltration, and generally out foxing bullies, is necessary for taking the initiative back from the bullies,, finding solutions with the very problem, and turning their strengths to weaknesses. Both so crucial to victory, as Sun Tzu emphasizes. Just as bullies target their victims, the Clique Busters must defend known targets of bullying and  scapegoats, and resist known bullies.

    Another priority of
    Clique Busters, as with every good idea, must be to preserve the integrity of Clique Busters itself. Clique Busters is empowerment, but power must not be allowed to corrupt. Especially should the sort of bullies who pretend benevolence and even believe it themselves are ever attracted to join the Clique Busters! Therefore part of the mandate of Clique Busters must be the creation of protocols for maintenance of bully and bulling resistant social psychological health internal to Clique Busters, and adequate screening of participants.

    Possible options include sustaining Clique Busters as a Transactional Analysis social environment internally, and on the horizon the hopes of future interaction on the frontiers of automated Sociometry..

    In an untrustworthy society, everyone must tow the line in order to make connections and gain defensive allies in order to inspire fear in potential enemies. No one wants to be isolated and singled out. But genuine freedom of association requires that no one needs to be liked by everyone or feared by anyone. In the words of Adlai Ewing Stevenson: “A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.” Civility must be extend to all. Alas, this is all to rare. 

    The Youth Culture Awareness Main Page cites School Bully Report 4/00

    A recent report issued by Duke University psychologists revealed that bullies are among the most popular boys in school from the fourth through sixth grade. The researchers surveyed teachers and male students in 59 classrooms from rural, suburban and inner-city schools in Chicago and North Carolina..  They explored the effect of bullying of classmates, which is often undetected or unpunished by school staff, on victims and innocent bystanders.  Duke University psychologist Philip Rodkin, lead author of the study that was published in the January issue of Developmental Psychology and other psychologists worry that popular bullies may be less likely to change their behavior than unpopular bullies because it works so well for them.  "These boys may internalize the idea that aggression, popularity and control naturally go together, and they may not hesitate to use physical aggression as a social strategy because it has always worked," Rodkin said. "But there will come a point in these boys' lives when this turns from an adaptive and fun to a lonely and potentially dangerous characteristic."  Parents may also unwittingly contribute to the problem by accepting or even encouraging aggressive behavior as long as their children are popular, Fisher said. 

        Developmental Victimology

    But, clearly, the break down of the adaptation Rodkin is counting upon does not always so reliably come to pass. Because the time tested tactics and patterns of the serial bully remain viable, unchecked and even highly successful in all manner of adult social context, none the least of which are the work place and even, most alarmingly, world affairs. 

    Schoolyard bullies, after all, face a far greater statistical probability of growing up to become common criminals. Unless, of course, they are slick enough for Politics.

    "Explain cliques and their mean maneuvers to your child as in terms of power and control, not friendship." Yes, indeed, and, or else, children, do explain it to your obtuse parents! "It is amazing just how diabolical these clique divas can be." Girls use a different kind of weapon: Parenting solutions for girlish scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility
     
    Who will find themselves conveniently discarded once thoroughly pillaged of opportune connections for social climbing? What manipulative lengths of devious and unscrupulous self-serving advantage finally skirt the boundaries of covert relational bullying? With the requisite, of course, of any personal acquaintance for access to begin with, one cynical tactic of social dominance is that which is sometimes called: "friend thievery", beyond ambiguity of manners and mores, raising every specter of dramatic and ethical conflict from motivations of jealousy, dishonesty and exploitation and depending upon what lengths anyone ever goes to, even simply for excitement just to forestall sheer boredom.

       Screams from Society "The Student As Nigger" The Columbine Massacre  Geeks R Us

    The Case Against Schools Alienation In The Life Of Students WHY NERDS ARE UNPOPULAR

     

     

     

    Giving unambiguous voice? Venting for impact: Guerilla Est tactics and their foreseeable drawbacks

    I want to scream, but I am given no voice
     
    Bullies may make you want to scream. What if you did that? Some serial bullies will only taunt the target of bullying who dares complain, or simply slink away, but others will compulsively engage, and struggle at truly fantastic Existential Validation. What if such an individual found themselves confronted not merely by any lone ostracized target of bullying, by an opposition group together? If nothing more that as a thought experiment in desperate exasperation, one utter last ditch and quite possibly inadvisable extreme though nevertheless still nonviolent at all conceivable option against the sheer perpetuated impunity of such destructive intimidation, harassment, baiting, deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility, threats and even violence from really intolerable adult bullies perpetuating junior high school abusiveness, harassment, attrition of relentless psychological warfare and worse, even physical violence outright, into adult life with impunity beyond even the meager authoritative restraint of bygone scholastic administration, speaking of mimesis, perhaps in order simply to break serial bullies down into acknowledging and confronting the unjust suffering from their wrong doing, because as things stand, amoral sociopathic serial bullies are so utterly unreceptive and just don't give a shred of reasonable compassion, serial bullies actually need to be admonished like unto unruly juvenile delinquents by rubbing their metaphorical noses in their own proverbial shit. -Though, indeed, far more harshly than may ever be compassionate or prudently advisable in dealing with real children and puppies:
     
    At some point, if need be, just to leave no possible ambiguity whatsoever, most effective might actually include readiness with repeated organized shattering public scolding en mass, from each and everyone that the bully or bullies have run rough shod or abused, consisting of a purging complete emotional venting back to the bullies of all that they have dumped upon others, protracted actual complete Drill Sergeant in-their-face Hitler-style screaming tantrums from men and sobbing breakdowns from women (or, hey! then again, and not to be unduly Sexist, vice versa might prove the more disorienting!), so long as the bullies have any retort or denial left. And should a bully still try to mock or laugh at one of the scolding CliqueBuster, another must then take over with fresh vehemence, as a safe way under controlled conditions, of publicly shedding all secrecy and restraint of expression and secret suffering on the part of hapless targets of serial bullying, back onto the serial bullies, and and somehow just publicly force them to deal with it and even at all acknowledge all grievances. If all else fails, such coordinated theatrical guerilla Est tactics may be conceived of as a way of removing the sense of restraint and social hypocrisy that bullies so smugly exploit, without actually resorting to real violence. A way of bringing the Encounter Group to the Bullies, as it where, if they will not willingly come and consider how they treat others. Bombastic, to say the least, for when all subtlety is wasted. As the old joke goes, why did the miner clobber the mule with a two-by-four? Just to get his attention!
     
    Although, not to sink to bullying of bullies, and, indeed, arguably, to be fairer and more cogent than traditional Est (Erhard Seminar Training) therapy, grievances however vehement and repetitive must remain lucid and distinct, and the path to real dialogue, if only to escape the verbal and emotional onslaught, must always remain open. Indeed, beyond doing the targets of bullying a world of satisfaction, the priority of simply getting persistent bullies to back off at all may be deemed adequate success, never mind reaching or improving them, a sheer bonus if that ever happens.
     
    Still, there may likely be many disadvantages to such an extreme approach, that might very easily be made to blow up in the faces of those who try it. After all, considering how often it seems that most people shun hearing the troubles of the abused, the targets of bullying, this kind of shattering exhibition, especially if the more public, may be more than the society will be willing to bear. And bullies are typically very sly and sneaky about getting away with their abuses in any public setting, wherein the target of bullying can be confused and misdirected and must restrain themselves, crushed and seething, much to the Sadistic delight of the bullies. For such is the bully's standard Modus Operandi.
     
    And so, in such public setting, this approach had best be timed and undertaken, if at all, only in extreme protest, in some over all plan of Activism and as overture to some sort of actual social uprising within whatever cultural context, not always be feasible, especially regards bullying in isolation rather than in a larger group of any kind.
     
    And there are, after all, more subtle but therefore logistically complicated tactics in the alternative. Rhetorically, even the very fantasy of somehow guerilla Esting bullies may serve to help defeated and discouraged targets of bullying to toughen up and realistically assess the needed level of commitment for stopping bullying, by highlighting the unreasonable Absurdity of commonly being expected to reason with persistent bullies, of intimidation into unilateral soft-bargaining, thereby surrendering to said bullies the initiative simply to remain as unreasonable as ever.
     
    Because guerilla Esting bullies is actually what it might take, if ever at all, to even begin to make any headway with the depraved indifference of amoral sociopathic serial bullies in denial and full of their own smug contempt for any weakness of reasonableness and conciliation. But what if as likely, even guerilla Esting serial bullies still never gets through to them? Fortunately, to reiterate, there are more subtle but, alas, logistically more complicated strategies to combat serial bullying: 

     

     

     

    Bullied to death!

    Personal statement: Bullying has driven so many to suicide, but it isn't always that straightforward. My name is Aaron Agassi. My own ability to help someone very dear to me and embroiled in a long and escalating cycle of dysfunction, exploitation and abuse, was vastly diminished by my own social isolation induced by willful and orchestrated calumny on the part of malignant cliques of well organized serial bullies and their cronies. To begin with, not only the target of ongoing abuse, but any witness thereof, is often traumatized. Not to mention that of course she was subjected to jealous peer pressure because of association with me. But more than this, physical death often can follow upon social death, and not only of the intended target. Everyone is a node on the social network. And recklessly vandalizing a node on the social network callously and irresponsibly risks resultant collateral damage by cutting off all hope of support. And that was exactly what happened.

    No one even suspected much less appreciated my struggle to help protect her very life as it turned out, much less to befriend and assist, because of shunning and mobbing driven by malicious conspiratorial evil gossip, envy and great whopping lies. And so, finally, grieving the loss of a close relative, she was destroyed, as far as I can make out, literally bullied into a fatal heart attack by another truly malignant and criminally predatory relative standing to inherit prime real estate. And her death was even that much more unnecessary and avoidable, only were I not so entirely forsaken to my own devices and my life not under such unremitting attack, traumatizing for her to witness and not just for me to endure. I had no one to turn to, no one to reach out to for insight, no resources of any help, and most lethally, no functional community of support in which to include her, as she so desperately needed to be, in order to over come debilitating fears and build the wherewithal to cope and to thrive. I was and I remain, calumniated, with no way to recover or move on. 

    Ongoing abuse doesn't only harm the target of abuse, but even traumatizes those who witness and live in fear with that abuse. Every alternate possibility of outcome in 20/20 hindsight, depends upon better outreach on my part for connection to help and support from any more expansive social network, in short, upon me being popular and connected. I often wished that I could just phone up central casting and surround myself with staunch social "proof" (informational social influence) in my own support and reliable good influences for her to rôle model, functional adult expectations along with unflagging social and emotional support without the dysfunctional conditionality to which she was all too accustomed and adapted. She was always curious to to meet anyone coming into my orbit. I witnessed the subtle transformation of her demeanor, with improvement of social environment, But this was all too rare, because of her own lowered expectations of herself, despite all that she had going for her. Hers was the very vulnerability most often exploited by exploitative cliques, paralyzing trust issues interpersonally, compensated by consuming heteronomy to peer expectations of idiots. Social cues where what she was most responsive to. Whereas interpersonally, she was prone to ambivalence and inertia. What she needed in order to cultivate the autonomy and wherewithal better to begin steadily overcoming conflict aversion and cope with all that was to come, was the consistency of inclusion in any more functional and uplifting web of support, with functional expectations to put her on her on her best behavior, and autonomy support instead of the insecure conditionality and codependence to which she was so accustomed and adapted. But I could not share with her or exposé her to what was never within reach for myself, in no small part because of envious Relational Bullies running such constant interference. harassment and defamation, expressly n order to prevent it.

    Shielded in hypocrisy, bullies will never be called to account for the incalculable harm they do by fraying the very fabric of society only in order to monopolize all connection for themselves and make all other beholden to them as self appointed gate keepers. Bullying is unsafe. Harassment is frightening and debilitating. Slander is deadly. Calumny and ostracism are often lethal, not just to their direct targets. Collateral damage can be severe and widespread. Bullying endures as a largely unchecked menace to public safety, happiness and productivity.

    My point: Bullying is not only incessant and ever escalating, but therefore completely open ended in its cascade of sheer bad karma, confluence of cumulatively mounting unfavorable circumstances, terminal clusterfuck. the proverbial perfect storm, with deadliest impact, like water seeking the lowest ground, one way or another relentless to strike down the most vulnerable already slipping through the cracks. There are no limits of moderation. And petty conspiratorial campaigns of shameless slander and malignant hate speech are only the beginning overture. Slander may be said to be murder with words, resulting in social death. But the utter destruction of an individual by incessant bullying, can and all too often does, one way or another, end in actual physical death. The sabotage with impunity, the predation and social network terrorism, that is bullying, produces the added painful hardship and impassible obstacle to bring about the tipping point of tragedy for the already vulnerable typically targeted for bullying and exploitation.

    To continue: One problem with any traditional strict injunction upon gossip, is resultant rejection, stifling and willful deafness to gossip as it swirls around one, failure to perceive and to address problems, missed opportunity to render vital assistance in any functional web of support. Gossip is the medium of reputation and accountability, the means by which one hopes to know what to expect of others, even the most idle curiosity that remains the medium of compassion, a call to alarm and assistance amongst friends and neighbors in trouble. Alas, however, how readily the proverbial grape vine, so completely unshielded, is infected and infested with dishonesty and malice, then locking up and failing to provide equal time for rebuttal;. The problem is that the individual listener is still burdened with the responsibility to filter such inputs as gossip, to search out reliable sources at all, and to judge and observe when gossip is telling us more about the speaker than anything else! So don't 'drink the Kool-Aid': Cognitive dissonance not withstanding, if the sensation of peer pressure stifles the voicing even of begged questions, then it's not actually the person under discussion that the hearer truly fears and with very good reason: Nobody even suspects where all the bodies are buried.

    For nothing is as insidiously perilous than constant deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility in which different people are manipulatively misdirected, intimidated, prevented and discouraged from contact. It will be important, therefore, to speak truth to power, to thwart malicious gossip by organizing campaigns of countergossip, befriending and sticking up for the unjustly maligned and slandered, while discretely facilitating networking, communication and eventual interaction between individuals who would not otherwise have the opportunity, and to teach others the habit likewise. At the very least, targets of cliquish isolation and manipulation are better off with any crucial opportunity simply to compare notes. After all: If your not supposed to talk to me, then what am I not supposed to tell you?! Like any good newshound, ferret out other sides to the story.

    For in order to advance their standing, bullies may lay in wait for others to slip up. Ah, but bullying itself is no faux pas, precisely because it is maliciously deliberate. Of course, this flies in the face of the opposing ideals of civility, where in, on the contrary, honor and esteem accrue in actually helping one another to save face, especially in matters of little moment. To begin with, social grace is simply not the enforcement of custom. Social grace is like ballroom dancing, wherein the consummate skill and dexterity is in making others, no matter actually how awkward, feel graceful.

    To reiterate, how well said is it that the backbiters takes upon themselves all the picayune venial sins they ever denounce and humiliate, a thousand fold, leaving their targets morally spotless in proportion. But bullies just don't get it: No matter ho socially inept you are, there is always someone the more socially inept, precisely because they imagine themselves so correct and qualified to impose their judgment upon others by whatever devious abuse. Indeed, what can possibly be more socially inept than persecuting the socially inept, even actually so, let alone simply branding targets of bullying as socially inept, as whatever sort of vague excuse or euphemism? Indeed, by contrast, what higher demonstration and élan of social grace can there be, other than by saving face for others, most especially the most helplessly socially inept, even the downright vulgar and unpleasant? And yet, bullying is indeed highly socially skilled. After all, deliberate malice is no social blunder! And what can be more damnable in bullyculture than faux pas? Certainly not the consummates skills of deliberate malice! Bullies are winners, and those they can victimize are luzers.

    Bullies unpunished persist. Bullies successful in driving out a target of bullying, escalate. Placating and accommodating bullies in the name of peace and sweet reason, is like chumming the waters to calm the sharks, or throwing tidbits to the wolves in hopes that then they will go away. The targets of bullying so in need of protection and defense, are the weakest links by which we are all intimidated and our liberties quickly eroded. No one is safe, until all are. No one is free, until all are. Even the pettiest bullying with impunity, quickly attracts ever more dangerous elements into whatever social sphere: predators, both criminal and lunatic, not to mention simply ever greater numbers of cliquish serial bullies and their cronies. A predator entering such a target rich social environment, will find their ground work already accomplished for them, targets of bullying already isolated and rendered vulnerable to ever more dangerous predation and exploitation, with the added dividend of inclusion and social capital for abusing every trust and networking the Affinity Scam. Everyone is at risk. 

    And thus shall conditions remain until organized and decisive action is responsibly marshaled. We are all at fault for continuing to permit so degrading a state of affairs. Something must be done.

    When a cult-like clique of bullies engages in consensus manipulation, typically feigning knight errantry while subjecting scapegiats and rivals to all manner of deviously scheming and masterfully socially adept sociopathic covert relational hostility, social isolation, ostracism, protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse, such cliques of bullies only disseminates selected (dis)information at such time and circumstance as they choose, and lead the target of propaganda indoctrination along in a group environment they control, so that one never is availed of any opportunity to look too closely at the big picture. This is crucual in yjr promulgation of dangerous worldviews that that no one in their right mind and good conscience could ever fall for!

    No less than any emotional vulnerability, such uncritical acceptance as above once achieved may tend to leave one vulnerable to well known and standard Methods Used in Brainwashing. Undisciplined mentation simply follows the pattern of whatever habits and ideas have been absorbed first. And bullying simply panders to insecure impulsiveness, sinking even deeper into coercion, manipulation and lying, only magnifying the specious illogic of insecure impulsiveness from sheer projection in the sense not only of the specific classic denial mechanism of the observer's own emotions, but more generally, the somewhat unthinking figuratively Solipsistic lack of imagination to simply assume that the nature of all things and people is generally little different from ones own. And amoral sociopathic patterns such as bullying color perception and behavior even further by adding to such Narcissism an even more deeply depraved indifference to others, which is also so helpful in lying convincingly.

    Critical Thinking, by contrast, seeks better judgment by striving to take everything into account, including itself, in order to be self correcting. Critical Thinking rests upon sound interpretation of written text; the well-balanced, coherent composition; the lucid comprehension of all what one hears about and experiences oneself; and the persuasive argument. Critical Thinking must rest upon proficient reasoning skills that can assure competency in inference, as well as upon proficient inquiry, concept-formation, and the cognitive skills to render ideas from one form, function, or context to another, and also to recognize that which may be lost in translation thereby.

    Of course, as the saying goes, always consider the source. All manner of self serving should also be questioned, as a perennial motive for slander and abuse. In the words of Edgar Allen Poe: "Believe nothing you hear, and only half of that you see." Indeed, there may even be surprising insight buried amid the spewing bile of sheer spite, beyond just (quite rightly forbidden) acceptance at face value, for the careful and analytic listener to follow up and investigate for themselves. If encouraging Critical Thinking can improve life, it will be because Critical Thinking increases the quantity and quality of meaning that individuals derive and evaluate from what they perceive and also that which they will be apprised of second hand, before making decisions and taking action.

    Like the The Propaganda Game®, the proposed 'Vulcan Master' TV game show is conceived as an effort to help better popularize Critical Thinking.

     

     

     
    My own crucial struggle at expression in call to action

    In the words of Bonnie Wasmund: “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” But it doesn't even have to be how you made them feel, but sentiment, emotion they may themselves associate with you in their own minds, subjectively, no matter what you ever actually do or say. Alas, to quote Elbert Hubbard: “Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.” Indeed how you make them feel, their response to the stimulus of your very existence, often consists of the sensations from recollection of receiving malicious gossip from others behind your back, or even from cunning deflection, meaning how their feelings where manipulatively conditioned, partially as by display or implicit threat of shame, in your presence or otherwise by whatever association entirely in their own minds from whatever their own motives and values. Because people gain impressions not only from what others do, but how those others are treated by others still. Indeed, people are intimidated, manipulated and coerced, even traumatized, not only by whatever harm comes to them personally, but what they see happening to others, not only by how one is treated oneself, but the treatment of others as witnessed, heard of, or even darkly hinted at. Especially in coordinated collusion of peer pressure, the sly triggering of such fearful approval seeking motivations socially, affords ready and significant control, especially of people howsoever lacking the autonomy for owning their own feelings in order ever to break the spell of cognitive dissonance, confusion and intimidation, the backbone of heteronymous behavioral structure. Such is the covert relational hostility of serial bullying, along with the conniving logistics of calculating ostracism, engineered social isolation and ongoing disruption, all well coordinated and facilitated by cliquish cronyism, perpetual endemic petty conspiracy.

    Alas that people who will readily believe one another about getting mugged or worse, balk incredulously at the seemingly paranoid tales of the even well documented and fully understood repertoire of typical conniving collusion by hardcore serial bullies. Taboo often serves as an heteronymous reinforcing mechanism of validate, denial, manipulation, coercion, oppression and persecution. Damaging malicious gossip in rationalization of abuse of power, is often laden with innuendo and taboo. Moreover, despite all recent progress and breakthroughs in public consciousness raising, the issue of serial bullying also remains shrouded in denial and targets of serial abuse, tending towards anxiety, depression and defeated retreat already, are still exploitatively conditioned and indoctrinated into learned helpless passivity like unto little angels, because that is more convenient to those in authority.

    A serious and just response to bullying in any social context, must explicitly recognize that while bullies may indeed sometimes bully one another, no, it does not actually "take two to tango." Indeed, in the words of Gustav Vasa: "One does not have peace longer than one's neighbour wants." And the bully is the obvious aggressor. A serious response to bullying must therefore reject willfully blind Pollyanna sweet reason and negotiation so ineffective against unreasonable bullies, and reject the utter denial, scapegoating and victim blaming that inevitably accrues. A serious response to bullying must reject entirely linkage of howsoever remediation of human imperfection with upholdance of such civil rights as freedom from bullying. A serious response to bullying must recognize that bullying is impossible to adapt to, and that while self improvement is laudable, such may nevertheless remain questionable as a response to bullying. Obviously, self improvement is better served by first providing a safe environment, free from bullying. And for that matter, a beleaguered target of bullying howsoever simply reacting even a little strangely, as manifesting inner conflict under pressure to peacefully endure adversity, or even struggling at all to object, resist or protest, is not thereby "asking for it." Indeed, any decent humane perspective upon bullying must at long last the extreme grace under fire of targets of bullying, who's forbearance the bullies routinely exploit. But in the absence of any such restraining compunction or deterrent at all, there is only antisocial abusive impunity, bullying and submission thereto. We the bullied, are not without responsibility to network, to learn how, to stand together and organize, from such contact as we do, indeed, establish, despite all the most perfidiously orchestrated harassment and covert relational hostility. Let's toughen up, like they used to tell us, and then make them eat their callous words and repent that good advice!

    Particularly, the central idea of CliqueBusters being the very topic of fighting back in any way at all, change from the bottom up, especially by low guile, covert or clandestine operation no matter how stringently moral and utterly non violent, especially without the cooperation of whatever authorities if any, and who, after all, are so often very much part of the problem, remains deeply taboo from all discussion. Bullies heteronymously tend towards highly developed social intelligence and tight cronyism, perhaps in compensation for such extreme deficiency in Emotional Intelligence. But perhaps outright bullying must be regarded as the extreme end upon a continuum of oppression and conflict, petty abuse of power, overt and covert relational hostility, adversative memetics, negative communication in social networks and peer pressure that has increasingly rendered social life ever more cowardly and paranoid tenuous experience of working behind enemy lines.

    This electronic document, while serving as counterpropaganda polemic against the most slippery and disingenuous apologetics, malignant pretzel-logic, deliberately impenetrable Obscurantism, willfully helpless and repressive goody two-shoes Pacifism on the one hand or on the other hand, the most brazen baiting with sly victim blaming that outright panders to evil, indeed in the face of all such implacable resistance at all most generally to raise consciousness in regards to the pandemic menace of bullying, nevertheless the primary outreach herein remains for anyone genuinely exasperated enough to at all seriously consider to conspire with me in this, a modest proposal in guerilla social engineering more definaive and reliable societal resistance to protractedly escalating peer abuse! Beyond awareness and the sociological background information provided, there remains the dire need to come together, face reality, frankly assess the situation and at long last frame an adequate agenda, the need for an organization, broad based logistical support, a clearing house for reciprocal alliances to conduct innovative outreach and intervention. -Even by low guile without apology, by whatever non violent clandestine or covert action to ferret out, expose, denounce, ridicule, defuse, outmaneuver, disrupt and undermine bullying and to befriend and defend targets of bullying even from well organized and orchestrated harassment, covert relational hostility, isolation and ostracism with protractedly escalating syndromes of shunning and mobbing. ambient or stealth abuse, neglect, abuse of power and defamation. CliqueBusters is a proposal to come together and deploy a new and different intervention strategy for bullyproofing. Email me privately if it's sensitive, or post to the forum in order to engage public controversy! And not just about bullying in general, but preferably at all also about Clique Busters in specific, please.

    Covert relational hostility is like unto the steady invasion of a stealthy occupying army, everywhere one might turn driving out all hope of human connection. The target of bullying with no recourse or channel of communication to question, rebut or protest, is left defenseless against every slander of malicious gossip campaigns that come to fill the information vacuum. With the social isolation of their target, bullies gain all the more impunity for all manner of abuse and harassment, even organized group stalking. The steady ongoing elimination of all competition allows oppressive bullies and cronies to assume and consolidate ever more power within the community. Bullying is immeasurably disruptive and destructive, presenting an ever clear and present danger.

    And what is most taboo, is the truth, reality, the actual unspoken functional social expectations, the subtext of social integration, ranging between timid heteronomy at the one extreme, to the other extreme of whatever is genuinely entailed in toughening up as they used to say, before all of that became politically incorrect, to wit, yes, those unspoken expectations, the taboo social skills consisting of any credible threat by whatever means, indeed if not the exercise of physical violence in demonstration thereof, then via subtext, the nonverbal expression and body language of solidarity in the will thereto. All of these obscure confused conflicting and morally ambiguous expectations, such momentous and fateful life options and dilemmas, all need urgently to be respectfully and openly discussed in good faith sensemaking in order to be rendered intelligibly transparent once and all and at long last.

    .com  

    According to 'Caught between Stages: Relational Aggression Emerging as a Developmental Advance in At-Risk Preschoolers': Not only are bullies more popular, but "children with average or above average social skills were also significantly more aggressive--both relationally aggressive and overtly aggressive, which was not true for children with below average social skills." The implication from the very title is that this correlation might be transitional in development, an early phase to be grown out of. Not so. Bullying remains correlated with popularity even into higher education and beyond.

    After all, bullying is clearly advantageous in every social context. Perhaps the ugly truth is that the most repugnant overt and relational tactics of hostility and abuse, or at minimum the sheer credible threat thereof that promotes and preserves social standing, all together constitute an even crucial social skills set that is quite taboo, absent from all deliberations and considerations of heteronymously goody two-shoes social skills remediation.

    Domineering people so often extol the adaptive virtue of submission. But in the real world, how much of social skills are about even submissively reducing friction in order to get along, or to be at all more mature, in seeking honorable compromise, and how much are about aggression and dominance by any means necessary or utterly gratuitous, even hostility and cruelty, all in rugged competition for the fear and hierarchical standing that substitutes for and renders so inconceivable, any glimmer of genuine respect? The latter amoral Darwinian scenario, left to ones own devices before the savage law of the jungle, has thankfully become politically incorrect. Of course what is really missing from the equation in order curtail hostility, cruelty and abuse, is courageous autonomy and the moral sense of fair play that is ultimately so dangerous to any petty authoritarian power. Hence, instead, such willful dereliction and neglect in the face of such divisive constant petty strife, the incessant demand for sheeple compliance from the most oppressed, but never simple justice and responsible democracy. The system predicated upon bullying is ever loath to combat bullying, and the anti-bullying movement is intrinsically a cultural overture to democracy.

    Alas however, even aggravated and frustrated school teachers griping and exhorting return to the corporeal punishment administered with the paddle out in the woodshed, because they are only venting and know full well that isn't serious, balk at such completely nonviolent alternative concepts as CliqueBusters, because that opens feasible possibilities, risk and responsibility and democracy anathema to heteronomy.

    Serial bullying is repeated abusive expression and/or action, whether howsoever overt or devious and clandestine, directed so as to harm to the target, place them in reasonable (not histrionic or trumped up) fear of harm, infringement upon the rights that disrupts their lives or creates a hostile social environment permeated with threat, intimidation, ridicule, or insult that is so severe or pervasive as to produce any of the aforementioned effects. Indeed, retaliation is any form of intimidation, reprisal, or harassment directed against any who would howsoever support or include a target of bullying and exclusion. And civility is the inculcation of a social contract of shared values never to enable but to continually resist, suppress, expose and undermine all serial bullying and to protect individual rights. CliqueBusters is conceived as ongoing bystander promotion and intervention of guerilla Transactional Antithesis in service of civility.

    Being made so unwelcome is lonely and frightening. And it's far more and worse than the petty irritation from the presence of petty individuals best ignored. Such is but the foreshadow! Bullying with such impunity, backbiting, covert relational hostility, ostracism, orchestrated harassment and even organized group stalking, can be so utterly and completely socially disruptive, even not entirely unlike, indeed at all analogous to, actual homelessness. For social support as ever may remain amongst the foremost predicate of capability and success, hence deficiency or mismatch to whatever actual needs, of social support, let alone ongoing virulent assault and sabotage, the very recipe for failure in every aspect of life.

    Manifestation of hostility, individual or collective alike, generally progresses with impunity, through verbal abuse, calumny and acts of humiliation, to noncooperation, abuse of power, violation of civil rights, and finally increasingly overt threat, all typically rationalized by whatever victim blaming petty innuendo and mean spirit. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course they will resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed than when they fail. The violation that is serial bullying, the degrading, distinctly uncivil demeaning and destructive situation of persistent ongoing abuse in a hostile social environment with complete impunity and no recognition in practice and recourse to upholding individual standing, autonomy, rights, joy, opportunity, safety and intrinsic worth, actingout contempt and inequality thereby, replete with the common place of victim blaming and scapegoating, even quasi-legislatively validating cruelty as an entitlement and amoral Sadistic superiority, breaches and shatters dignity to the core and engenders the traumatic distress of Existential helplessness defined as the shattering despair of utter dependency upon others surrounding and entirely bereft of trust and hope therein. The Three stages of Stress ensue, from alarm through helpless perseverance, but ultimately only into physical and emotional depletion and collapse.

    Woody Allen said that “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” But not for targeted individuals of serial bullying and ostracism. It's worse than invisibility! However shrouded in taboo, the adversative memetics of covert relational hostility and peer abuse, flagrant abuse of power, injustice, social ostracism, malicious gossip, orchestrated harassment and cockblocking are all predatory civil rights violations under USC 18 Section 241 and profoundly destructive. Even under whatever sly hypocritical lunatic persecutory vigilante pretext of combating howsoever vaguely demonized mythically threatening undesirables, eccentrics, dissidents, vulnerable socially awkward targets of opportunity, often our best and brightest, the manipulatively devious actingout of cliquish bullying is relentlessly divisive, abusive, corrosive and corrupting, sexually and emotionally exploitative, and above all: anticompetitive intimidation, heteronomy and conformity. Cliquish bullies are the kind of people who feel most deeply that life just isn't fair unless they have everything, and everyone else has nothing. And their practiced proficiency is in nothing less than routine dominance and the monopolization of opportunity in every aspect of life, the control of social interconnection for every purpose. -yes, especially sex.

    Peacefully dealing with incompatible people is crucial to living in a society. Arguably, dealing with people you can't stand may constitute the very definition of society as we have ever known it, different people with opposite tastes and conflicting personalities one way or another pressed together and somehow cooperating, often through gritted teeth, in any balance of hard bargaining and reciprocity. Exactly such true to life drama often demands if not self control and deference on the part of oneself and others, then any credible threat to keep them at bay, be that of effective personal vengeance, concerted mutual protection or even due process for all, depending upon upon fictional genre or actual situation. Again, in the words of Adlai Ewing Stevenson: “A free society is one where it is safe to be unpopular.”  

     

     

     

    Next will be established the nature and motivation for bullying from it's ancient and natural advantages, then the destructive toll which bullying has always taken, then support for the worst case assumption, to whit, that existing recourse is all too often not adequate, indeed that the authorities, such as may exist, may actually worsen the problem. Finally will be proposed in a distinct paradigm shift, organizing in new and different ways, with a unique and distinct body of practices and procedures, to monitor, recognize and respond to bullying by new and innovative measures. -The justifiability all whereof will be duly questioned and then seriously addressed as it deserves to be.

    There is a common dilemma in writing, that to omit background obscures by lack of context, while to include adequate and extensive background obscures by detracting from whatever central new idea. Worse, engaging against the craven weasely denials of apologists likewise feeds into their diversionary slight of hand, while, in the alternative, virulent lies uncontested stand and propagate unassailed in veracity and consequence. And so I regret to impose upon the reader to work their way through, finding whatever they need hopefully included, in order then to glean all that is crucial and central.

    As an author finding ones own voice even identity and POV, Point Of View, beyond tone, syntax and structure alone, that is the moment, finally, of the lucid and vivid articulation of theme, gaining momentum and central clarity from whence all else unfolds smoothly and powerfully. Whereas to be relationally bullied, manipulated, confused, invalidated, isolated from social connection and robbed of ones voice, is Peripeteia crushing unto despair.

    George Orwell observed the difficulty in framing ones thoughts, when there is no one with whom to communicate them. By the Metaphor of newspeak, in '1984' Orwell also most famously noted how a culture in systematic denial may actually strip the very language of expression of whatever taboo ideas and observations. Indeed, by tracking the changes on this very page via the WayBack at archive.org, it can be seen how I have however awkwardly struggled to expose cockblocking before I knew that word, and likewise for slut shaming, both being after all simply instances of covert relational hostility, another very cogent term sometimes denounced in stubborn pretence that there is simply no such utter nonsense! But it is the reality that is crazy and crazy making.

    For in the words of Thomas S. Szasz in 'The Myth of Mental Illness' New York: Harper & Row 1974. "This…is the essential communicational dilemma in which many weak or oppressed persons find themselves vis-à-vis those who are stronger or who oppress them: if they speak softly, they will not receive a hearing; if they raise their voices literally, they will be considered impertinent; and if they raise their voices metaphorically, they will be diagnosed as insane." - or, presumably, otherwise generally dismissed, or marginalized as however kooky or less than credible, often subject to the effective ostracism of social mockery and with utter impunity, even that which Sam Vaknin has dubbed: ambient or stealth abuse. In other words, the proverbial porridge will never be the just the right metaphorical temperature, but either too cool to raise alarm, or too scalding hot for good manners and the delicate comfort of powers that be of status quo ever turning a deaf ear. Indeed, all such efforts will generally only backfire one way or the other, given the power relations of bullying as they stand. Anyone no matter how graceful, considerate and forthright a mensch, may come to be treated as a pest or worse, purely because of the irresponsible awkward squeamish self serving hypocrites.

    Even Gandhi in his heart privately endorsed war against the Nazis, much as he exploited the crisis to speed an end to British rule in India. After all, there is never really any question as to whether or not to resort to any measure, no matter how extreme, let alone anything the more measured and moderate, but only as to under what conceivable circumstances and as to whatever viable alternatives if any. Nonetheless: The two most enthusiastically positive email respondents to CliqueBusters, nevertheless would barely be pressed to acknowledge and simply and adamantly refused to discuss the central concept of open or even covert or clandestine even though utterly nonviolent intervention against bullying! One of the two in his own emotionally charged experience and reflection, resonated strongly with my prose, while the other greatly valued the insight and information resource.

    For as Chen Yehezkely likes to point out, the most effusive praise for whatever comparative incidentals but deliberately blind and off target from whatever is revolutionary and that ought to be controversial, can be a far more frustrating and devious diversionary tactic away from taboo realization FNORD and instead for enforcement of taboo and truth suppression, even than any the most virulent condemnation, baiting and Appeals to Humor, Ridicule and Spite or social mockery, ostracism and persecution, as mad, foolish, stupid, unintelligible and pretentious. Indeed, another who found herself dealing with bullies, appreciated the insight from the information resource provided, but when pressed, resented my contention that we who are bullied bear any responsibility to discover any effective response in order to stand up for ourselves, and likewise refused to discuss the very idea, as did another who even found my prose strong and resonant with their own experience. But what was most sad was explaining to another abused and vulnerable soul that no such organization as CliqueBusters as yet exists to protect them. For even after all this time, CliqueBusters remains merely a proposal.

    Alas instead how typical weak and passive advice the likes of Be Bully Free - Tips & Tricks is frequently proffered, coming too little too late. Conflict averse cowards have even sunk so far into bullyspeak apologetics as to complain that Clique Busters seeks to bully the bullies, thus sinking to their level, and that two wrongs don't make a right. I counter that the repertoire of Clique Busters techniques and responses are well within the conscience even of Pacifism, turning the tables, throwing the curve ball, playing the Transactional Antithesis, subversively elevating with justice, the mimesis of the bullies from scapegoating into a valuable morality play upon civility. And even then, as intended only for deployment given the failure of compassion, sweet reason and peace making, and as an alternative to the scapegoating, victim blaming and breakdown, conditioning of victims to passivity which so often follows, when there is a failure to stand up to unreasonable bullies who depend upon opposition being so completely wishy-washy. 

     

     

     

    Lifting the impossible burdens placed upon the targets of incessant serial bullying

    Again, the trust of the target of bullying must be well and fully earned by unconditional opposition to bullying, before any even however most minimal added restraint or cooperation be requested from the target of bullying, and even then, most humbly and apologetically, under the circumstances of bullying which, after all, ought make responsible authorities blush. -and in so blushing, so to speak, and as publicly as possible, thereby already engender public disgrace for the bullies.

    If any acknowledged adult where to plainly state words to the effect of: "Thoroughly bored of your tiresome intimidation as I have become, nevertheless I take you extremely lightly, my good fellow, because we both know that if you where ever to raise your hand to me or anyone else within my sight, I shall certainly fill out a police report and see it through to criminal charges. But mind your manners, sir, and we might even get along by ignoring one another." -would that qualify him or her as a Reactive Victim type or tactic amid the bullying circle, or the response as somehow provocative or Masochistic, in any functional adult society? Indeed, shouldn't the prospect of whatever suitable official complaint be the expressly preferred deterrence in civil discourse? If threats of appropriate action are only deemed provocative and mouthy, then is that to admit that any attempt at negotiation, any warning of appropriate action is wasted, or worse, are we agreeing with mobsters, that complainants to whatever authorities are are no better than vermin, nothing but "rats"?

    After all, if violence in kind is all we esteem and at all
    respect, then why be coy about it? Indeed, in one way or another, some or any objection at all will eventually be crucial in salvaging self esteem from humiliation. And for that purpose, simply weeping and bawling openly in public might not quite do. So, exactly how are we to expect people to ever stand up for themselves? A dignified Pacifistic turning of the other cheek, will be ineffective, indeed counterproductive, without conscience or moral suasion to leverage. Do we embrace the typical view of thugs and bullies of complainants as "rats," or do we honor fully all legitimate redress? This question must be pressed, always, to a satisfactory resolution, both as a matter of official policy and informally, socially, by CliqueBusters.

    Because, plainly, threat of whatever appropriate official complaint should actually be protected and encouraged both officially and in society at large. Anything less is
    conditioning to helpless passivity that is part of victim blaming and scapegoating. And in case such is ever undeserved, than the natural response ought to be something on the order of: "Well then go ahead and lodge your complaint if you must. That doesn't frighten me because I obviously haven't done anything wrong." If both the grievance and the objection thereto come in good faith, a heated yet substantive exchange might ensue, even moving towards honest mediation.

    Indeed, isn't rational
    controversy the most civilized and constructive exchange to which any society of autonomous individuals ought to pride and aspire? Do we not value forthrightness? And what is the acceptable response, but likewise? Or do we simply coddle actingout because in actuality, we only offer lip service to our ostensible democratic values? Clique Busters must actually orchestrate open and public validation of free expression of grievance and of whatever applicable due process, not merely in the abstract, but as example cases arise, locally.

    Indeed, it should hardly come as any surprise that bullies would be averse to the ideas of free expression of grievance and due process against bullying, or that bullies, criminals and oppressors actively discourage either practice. All the more reason why increased bullying in response to being warned to desist from bullying (in legal terms: retaliation) should be punished most quickly and severely of all, by whatever means are licit. Or else authority becomes an ugly joke. Indeed, any such predictable behavior of bullying can and should be exploited by
    Clique Busters against bullies at every opportunity, and as repeatedly, publicly and shatteringly as possible. Anything less is sheer impunity for bullying. Because bullying unpunished only persists.

    All this being said, nevertheless, what are we to advise the target of bullying, as a real world practical matter, as regards to sticking up to bullies with a fair warning of whatever appropriate redress? Strategically, we might not recommend it unless interest in whatever due process is reciprocal, which would be un
    characteristic of bullying. It is a righteous individual accused that actually demands their due process. Indeed, to be politic, it might be suggested that if the bullies only behave the worse, then clearly they deserve no fair warning. Instead, one unnerving tactic might even be to smile wickedly at the bullies as if one has a secret!

    But blaming the target of bullying for being provoked at all is entirely unacceptable no matter what, and be every means must be decisively ruled out, by whatever necessary disruption, before any further discussion.
    Whatever alleged provocative nuance of the target is no more excuse for bullying than short skirts are for sexual abuse. Any cooperation provided by the target of bullying beyond due process and accordance with the rights of the accused, ought to be treated as an immense favor. That the targets of bullying must deal with bullying is undue and burdensome trouble on the part of the targets of bullying. Never must the target of bullying be rebuked simply for imperfect coping or other such nit picks. No one is perfect and bullying by nature is impossible to cope with. And anyone must first be rescued from danger and abuse before ordinary self improvement can again be seriously considered. Basic protections must never be excused or made contingent upon picayune complaints, much less invented grievances. Any restraint on the part of the target of bullying ought to be appreciated and considered for what it truly is, tremendous grace under fire and an immense favor indeed to the society that has failed in the protection of the individual. The trust of the target of bullying must be well and fully earned by unconditional opposition to bullying, before any even however most minimal added restraint or cooperation be requested from the target of bullying, and even then, most humbly and apologetically, under the circumstances of bullying which, after all, ought make responsible authorities blush. -and in so blushing, so to speak, and as publicly as possible, thereby already engender public disgrace for the bullies.

    Again, meekly, obsequiously and most publicly apologizing in wretched mortification for flagrant bullies may even be far more devastating thereto even than actually scolding the bullies however soundly, much less actually accommodation or victim blaming and
    scapegoating. And as a matter of optimal casting for maximal devastation and humiliation of bullies and their vicious cliques, the apologetic spokespersons might be any sort of authority figures and minor celebrities, figures of pathos such as the elderly and infirm, or however passably attractive women.

    Vague impossible and/or expanding demands and/or complaints/accusations, secrecy rather than useful feedback to at all chart one's progress in meeting whatever such demands, reasonable or unreasonable, are all typically all part of setting up the target of bullying for failure as a pretext ominously building up to abuse of power in the form of sanction of whatever sort. A decidedly helpless, maddening and Kafkaesque Paranoid experience. Aesop said: "It is no use pleading when the prosecutor and the judge are one and the same." -As when the whoever takes it upon themselves to define whatever sort of standards are also taking upon themselves to decide who and who does not meet such invented benchmark (however defined or deliberately undefined). And this will tend to be difficult to demonstrate, as such tend to be very slippery and unaccountable. 

    And hence such ordeal only accrues the terror, attrition and exhaustion from endless Cat and Mouse headgames. For authority or peer pressure is well known evaporate what little support that the target of bullying may have found within an organization or hierarchy of whatever sort, as if it where never there at all. Hence, the best standard advice for targets of bullying is to hold onto sanity, trust no one, and to take great care not to say anything that might be turned against one, and to document all interactions, verbal and otherwise, with bullies.

    An interlocutor available by phone or email to help the target of bullying keep and organize such a journal or log even by conducting and recording interviews for voice to text transcription might be not only emotionally supportive and validating but actually useful. Indeed, a drop in visit on site for just such might even be intimidating for bullies and their
    sycophants! Indeed, one effective mode of intervention might be to contact and keep tabs on any target of bullying, to conduct just such ongoing interview and keep records. And, of course, ongoing covert electronic surveillance may also help best cover such vital needs of record creation and maintenance. And there is even The National Bullies Register. (Though it currently seems dormant.)

    Clique Busters is conceived to help network all such above vital needs in bullying crisis.

    Any target of bullying will also be well advised to locate and secure witnesses and their written or recorded statements to back up one's own testimony of specific experiences or observations. Of course, that would be easier with the help of
    friends! And for the isolated and harried targets of bullying, Clique Busters, in outreach and recruitment, is conceived to bring those who need it together to provide just such reciprocal assistance.

    A target of bullying will also be most fortunate to find support and/or mediation from an outside source to meet with all parties and find some middle ground and even, if all else fails, to help the target of bullying in the pursuit of legal
    action, perhaps as even under USC 18 Section 241, if only supporting evidence is obtainable.

    That, too, should be one of the roles of
    Clique Busters, but not to the extent of reinventing the proverbial wheel. Rather, a) to serve such function in social contexts and situations where such a thing does not yet exist and probably has not been considered, and b) for outreach, intervention to immediately bring targets of bullying (who might otherwise ill advisedly simply try to weather the storm and hope in vein for things to blow over) together with whatever help exists, is available, and is found to be at all reliable and useful. This will also afford the opportunity for Clique Busters to build ties of common cause to existing and influential associations.

    Roots of Empathy, actually utilizes regular visits with an infant into the classroom to reduce levels of hostility by teaching social/emotional competence/literacy and empathy in order to effectively help elevate each student's emotional quotient, the quotient between the "emotional age" and the chronological age in order to measure Emotional Intelligence, how well a person understands emotions, intelligence regarding the emotions, especially in the ability to monitor one's own or others' emotions, particularly as determined by such as the MSCEIT (Meyer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test).

    And surely, the above empathy tactics are as benign as it ever gets! So, can there any imaginative context or pretext for wider application? And could such ever be enough alone? Or might it remain safer to maintain a broader array of appropriate tactics against bullying?

    Indeed, though already slightly more confrontational, the Bully Fix of Dr. Michael Leeds is an intervention wherein the participants, perhaps also including the targets of bullying too, gather together with the bully in an encounter group, and the bully is made aware of their own bullying behavior by demonstration, by being triggered into such habitual response under the controlled conditions, in order then to have said bullying behaviors lucidly pointed out to the bully. And it does seem only fair, after all.

    Now, some bullies, hither to so blithely un-self-aware will be given awkward pause, ultimately to contemplate changing their ways. How wonderful, always! But other bullies, unable to cope, will retreat into denial, and the worst most Narcissistically indifferent will only smile and taunt: "what-cha gonna do about it, chump?" -Or any range between just such brazen flagrantly hostile expression or else slippery subtext still to that same effect.

    That us why Clique Busters proposes, if need be, to go any further than the The Bully Fix in so far as to contrive the necessary encounters and dramatic mimesis between bullies and targets of bullying, even without the cooperation of whatever authorities if any, and to at all explore whatever feasible and decent nonviolent prospect of going beyond simply making bullies aware of their behaviors, merely bringing to the attention of bullies their misdeeds, if and as ever need be.

    Whereas future interaction on the frontiers of advanced automated Sociometry may be conceived such as to open even to bullies, more meaningful connections than the pathetic Existential co-Validation of their cronies. To provide better compatible matches to better integrate even bullies into society, in order to improve them. But it always pays to have a contingency or an added motivator. And that's where Clique Busters comes in. In case their world must be brought to end, for ours to begin!

    That is why the Clique Busters are to routinely infiltrate the cliques of the bullies with operatives under cover feigning approval for bullying, in order to better maintain surveillance and intelligence gathering. Let alone, ever by any means or notion, outreach to reform them. 

    After all, even Harry Seldon (unlike Karl Marx) had a Second Foundation up his sleeve to safe guard his great plan from distortion.

    The brilliance of viral marketing future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced
    automated Sociometry. will be that even people who do not actively access the system, may still be profiled and matched thereby, from the compiled data anonymously entered by others. Future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry. promises more than merely a revolution in software, but a paradigm shift in culture as practiced by all people, facilitating outreach, even to the isolated or victimized. And, if need be, via Clique Busters, perhaps all the better to help bullies by consistently disrupting their bullying. Which is only what a truly civil society ought to do in the first place! Despite the concerns of critics who deem it intrusive to "educate" others. Some bullies, kiss ass that they are, may even take a hint and desist. 

    Clique Busters will also be important, because, as well as simple harassment and intimidation, bullies conspire and work together toward what is now recognized as and termed covert relational hostility, or to coin another description: interpersonal sabotage, or even: social network terrorism. The very opposite motivating goal put forth for anticipated future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry..

    Conflict averse cowards have even sunk so far into bullyspeak apologetics as to complain that Clique Busters seeks to bully the bullies, thus sinking to their level, and that two wrongs don't make a right. I counter that the repertoire of Clique Busters techniques and responses are well within the conscience even of Pacifism, turning the tables, throwing the curve ball, playing the Transactional Antithesis, subversively elevating with justice, the mimesis of the bullies from scapegoating into a valuable morality play upon civility. And even then, as intended only for deployment given the failure of compassion, sweet reason and peace making, and as an alternative to the scapegoating, victim blaming and breakdown, conditioning of victims to passivity which so often follows, when there is a failure to stand up to unreasonable bullies who depend upon opposition being so completely wishy-washy.

    On the other hand, for those who see resistance to bullies as at least possibly appropriate, but for whatever reason, question the idea of reformation thereof, let thwarting bullies be considered the primary objective, while any moral lesson learned by bullies from being consistently thwarted, behavioral extinction and the Psychiatric breakdown of the adaptation, be considered a possible and welcome added moral victory. 

    To paraphrase Carl von Clausewitz, Clique Busters is the continuation of civilized policy by different means. Clique Busters is the waging of peace.

    Make no mistake, the Ethics and morality of Clique Busters is a very serious consideration. Indeed, is it even possible for any sort of moral code to cover every conceivable circumstance or option? Not to mention that any action, however righteous, may have all manner of unintended and unforeseen consequences and repercussions. So, moral paralysis is not actually so hard to understand.

    But as nothing can be perfect, the tactical options of the Clique Busters approach only needs to offer hope of improvement to be worthy of further serious consideration.

    Consider also, that whatever the rules of engagement from the onset, in the end people will end up doing things differently, one way or another, according to their own natures. Any human process may evolve or simply go awry! -No matter what safe guards may be undertaken.

    History teaches us that there is grave concern in sanction of action against people then for whatever reason classified as destructive, no less than in the alternative extreme of tying the hands of innocent victims.

    Yes, life is often intrinsically and inevitably offers only the limited and dubious freedom that is choice of lesser evils. And, so, in any given situation, what are the alternatives? If a viable alternative, one that is not already failed and that is more responsible than Clique Busters presents itself, then, perhaps that ought to take precedence. But passivity and denial only abjure all responsibility, providing enablement for impunity compounding whatever damage.

     

     

     

    The Absurd Meaningless Futility of Life

    The very first thing anyone ever pays attention to as an infant and later a young child is whatever one needs to survive in physical reality. Indeed, the very first lesson you learnt, was that your survival depended upon others. Specifically, you learnt what to do (and later, to say) in order to get what you needed. You learnt that when others approved of you, they would nurture you. When they disapproved of you, they would withdraw that nurturing.

    You learnt to pay attention to whatever gave you the ability to control your environment. You discovered what made your care-givers pay attention to you and give you what you wanted. Later you learnt what you could do to get what you wanted on your own: grasp, reach, crawl, walk and so forth.

    The basic need to survive focused your attention on whatever would aid the process of receiving approval and control. In turn, then others molded not only behavior, but even perception and worldview.

    As dubiously attributed to Dr. Seuss (Theodore Geisel): "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." But oppression is a situation, circumstance or state of affairs wherein those who mind bully. And resultant lonely isolation is a situation, circumstance, state of affairs or experience, howsoever bereft of those who don't mind.

    When it comes to reaching out to others, there is always the direct approach to simply court whomever the other personally. Or, indeed, another indirect and even somewhat devious strategy, or courtship display, especially if one is adept at socializing and can make oneself the center of attention, is to join in with the peer group of another, and pay most of one's attention to them especially if they are of the other sex, so that they will pay attention in return; for the attention of the peer group must impress the other of the advantages in association, and also must illicit envy in the whomever the other so that they will become desirous of one's attention and therefore pay one better attention. Either way, however, there are the pitfalls of jealousy and hostility from whatever competing vested interests, cliques of hypocritical self serving bullies, unless one discerns and pays whatever their sycophantic price of collusion to ingratiate oneself and/or/else can adequately intimidate them.

    Otherwise, that is why so many work so hard simply to blend in and escape notice rather than to shine. In the immortal words of Margret Mead: “Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.”  For such are the incentives and disincentives, reward and punishment, to condition people that they will yearn to belong the group, when it is actually more directly interpersonal relationship, friendship, that they are really desperate for. -To crush all misfits and dissidents and render the masses attachment disordered but socially skilled, sacrificing deeper and genuine robust and healthy autonomous social development essential to freedom in favor of conformist and heteronymous socialization in an ongoing program inculcated under the Inductivism of what passes for education, with the effect of better recruitment in the preservation of status quo by the eager and ubiquitous Fifth Columns of the Reactionaries even within ostensibly or nominally open and democratic society, wherein more straightforward and pervasive blatantly dictatorial brutality will be unacceptable but tactics of, for all intents and purposes, injurious participatory mass brainwash are normal, even banal.

    Of course they may be such a bunch of utter pussies, full of feeble excuses for such pliant and ineffectual resignation, but perhaps they see the world as it is: The notorious dicks pussies and assholes soliloquy consists by far of the most memorable lines from 'Team America' in such opportune parody of cynical action adventure movie pandering propaganda. Alas however, that in truth, only the most complete drunken pussy would ever actually exhort reliance upon dicks to fuck assholes. And yes, after all, dicks do tend to be found in position actually only for being welded by assholes shitting all over everything, just not the assholes that get behind such utter rank steaming pussies. And weak stomachs, dwelling upon the entire odious stench, so ineffectually elevated only just barely so above assholes, pussies and dicks, can only find any other outlet the arduously longer way out, in helpless poorly targeted Existential nausea and disgust. But a least even that is an upward momentum.

    In all things, the substance beyond mere form, the dynamic and flexible social engineering principles, personal WhistleBlowing, good sportsmanship and responsible values of rational democratic progress are systematic doubt, hope in the honest embrace of fallibility and tolerance for uncertainty, substantive discourse, debate of disputes, criticism without punishment and no insult taken, free inquiry into problems openly and publicly without fear of punishment, indeed, open unfounded speculation about different case scenarios pursuant to any number of varied and different proposed measures, without need of conforming or in any way limiting said speculations to any accepted quasi-official position.

    The very values and aptitudes ever fostered in brainstorming!

    And all pursuant to experiment, trial and error, the vital opportunity for all manner of ongoing reevaluation and revision, open ended correction of mistakes and improvement at all levels,
    piecemeal, without bloodshed, violence or even strife as such, in any culture of respect.

    Civilized adversarial systems and healthy attitudes, formal or informal, that are the bulwark of our precious freedoms, are predicated upon systematic doubt. But the antiseptic and dehumanizing demands pressed by blind loyalty and faith of conformity and compliance, crushing, silencing, excluding or marginalizing all oppositional protest as a matter of course, either preclude entirely or eviscerate and enfeeble, all doubt and curiosity at all, whatsoever.

    As appetite or disposition, beyond the debased pandering fantasy and voyeurism of prurient gossip, real curiosity promotes meaningful attachment, not only exploration and learning, but connection, empathy, care, concern, compassion, much as, beyond bitter insularity, sheer credulity promotes not only Criticality but justice and fairness, all of which are excluded by utter indifference, plain cowardice and approval seeking conformism. Autonomy, responsible risk management, creativity, curiosity about reality and individuals easily comes into conflict on every level, with adaptation, risk phobic attentiveness to social cues upon which so much depends, that must so often guard itself from curiosity, compassion and conscience, instead promoting bigoted prejudgment, irresponsibility and malice by rendering impunity for jealous rage.

    “There is in fact a manly and legitimate passion for equality that spurs all men to wish to be strong and esteemed. This passion tends to elevate the lesser to the rank of the greater. But one also finds in the human heart a depraved taste for equality, which impels the weak to want to bring the strong down to their level, and which reduces men to preferring equality in servitude to inequality in freedom.” 
     
    — Alexis de Tocqueville

    All manner of people and circumstance are harmful in so many different ways, but there is particular vulnerability to self-esteem and sense of power, not merely from abuse of power or humiliation in and of itself, but in shrinking, in restraint, self-control, submission, compliance, conforming to situation, backing down, especially to those most beneath contempt; all thus belittled, duller and mincing ones words in cognitive dissonance; all as bullies laugh up their sleeves. And such is life. But under such circumstances, one can only question oneself: Whatever threat or benefit, is it all really worth it? One cannot but nurse the festering grudge, feeling only the more petty and helpless.

    Bullying must be predicated, one way or another, if not upon captivity or restriction in one sense or another, then manipulation, somehow getting sucked in against better judgment, indeed, as individuals, in life, are routinely drawn into freedom inhibiting interaction patterns, interpersonally and with the larger social environment and institutions. And whatever theoretically wider freedom of choice offered will tend to be actually encumbered (both by bureaucracy outright and simple lack of facilitation or logistical support) with user unfriendly bewildering and unmanageable complexity as to render it practically speaking, unavailable to most people, all but the most socially capable and steady nerved, regardless of real talent and ability.

    Otherwise, who would choose to endure such protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, bullying and abuse? And the damage should never be underestimated or taken for granted. And yet what is omitted from 'Complex PTSD A National Center for PTSD Fact Sheet' is even mention of the harm resulting even from constant low level stress, let alone anything any more harrowing including ambient or stealth abuse, never mind only the very worst life and death ordeals. And so it should come as little surprise that the conditions of captivity listed in 'Complex PTSD A National Center for PTSD Fact Sheet' are woefully incomplete:

    To begin with, at whatever whim of fate, we are each and all disgorged helpless into a condition of captivity by
    dependency, the family, better or worse, invariably dysfunctional to some degree, a misfortune only to be summarily compounded by yet more demeaning conditions of captivity and unremitting constant low level stress, particularly in education and employment.

    go to work, send your kids to school follow fashion, act normal walk on the pavements, watch T.V. save for your old age, obey the law Repeat after me: I am freeOr, as so excellently and eloquently well expressed in that Postmodern driving staccato refrain of The Godfathers:

        Birth, School, Work, Death

    Hence, another description of Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder might be life itself, the human condition as we know it. Because, in nature, more often than not, happiness is but an empty and unlikely hope existing only to perpetuate struggle. In the alternative, whatever idealistic notions of happiness and dignity are unnatural, either democratic and historically recent, belonging to the technologically Industrialized World, or else embodying whatever untenable nostalgia for mythic innocence.

    Maslow's famous "Pyramid" Hierarchy of Needs begins with sheer biological life support plus amenities. Alienation and helplessness already begin to undermine safety and security concerns that not only project all such immediate practical concerns into the uncertain future, but also encompass the reassurance of defense, care and nurture. But alienation is even more obstructive to social needs along with those of self esteem and self actualization.

    The two possible active means to security, or else actual threat thereto, are either the self or others, society, which brings us to the social needs. The social needs are
    connection, love, sex and respect, or failing that, their manipulative counterfeit of conditionality and helpless exploitation. Against which self esteem, as we have seen, also a function of the same drive for security, is fulfillable only by empowerment, control over one's environment, and, the more so, self-actualization is also empowerment, peak experience of fulfillment by true vocation, towards realization of full potential, investigation, knowing and understanding, creativity, motivated goals ever put forth and causes. Hence, in actuality, true love and respect must empower, if not whatever lofty pinnacle of self-actualization, then at least functional autonomy. Indeed, all self realizing true vocation, investigation, creativity, motivated goals ever put forth and causes, must somewhere and somehow aim at and relate to some manner of utility in the needs of the individual, in other words, clear added value to whatever specific target market(s). Or else they will be abstract beyond correspondence to reality! -Pointless obsession... Thus, social needs cannot neatly be met first, only then whetting some hither to dormant loftier apatite for self realization. For, clearly, alienation worms deeper than that.

    Hence, depending upon variable tolerance for sheer petty conditionality as a price for security at all, many simply yearn and strive to fit in one way or another, while others in society who undergo positive maladjustment therefore aspire to autonomy. the free self-organization and administration of their own affairs from the bottom upward.

    For alienation is the condition in which individuals find themselves at cross purposes with, and dominated by, forces and institutions of our own creation, driven by their own Monopolistic agendas, confronting the individual as overbearing, loveless, conditional, bullying, threatening and
    manipulative alien powers.

    The dimensions of alienation include powerlessness, meaninglessness, normlessness (anomie), social isolation, cultural estrangement and self-estrangement.

    Many conform as best they may. Many live in all manner of learned helplessness, frustrated
    denial and fantasy. Others still, only lash out, one way or another. But can there be any better free choice? That is the mission of FoolQuest.com, the struggle with unhappiness, against alienation and for self-actualization or at least freedom and autonomy, on various fronts. The Clique Busters concept, in specific, addresses the obstacles of conditionality and malice, continual and systematic abuse of power that is the very antithesis of self realization. In a nut shell, Clique Busters seeks to contend with bullying. After all, bullying remains motivated from membership in the dark side of terror management strategy and failed confrontation with Existential Absurdity. But only given autonomy and democracy, the very same prevailing and abiding mortal terror instead can motivate compassion, morality and friendship.

     

     

     

     

    G Vs E

     

    Gresham’s Law states that banality, the overwhelming volume of that which is either inherently of low quality or else poorly directed drives out that which is unique, of better value, or resources including effort and attention well focused. In other words, that quantity can and does overwhelm quality. And this already profoundly impacts all evolutionary processes. In short, fitness is not the same thing as excellence or arête. That evolution of whatever sort need not actually favor excellence. On the contrary, evolution may favor the easiest thing to be rather than the highest quality end product. There will always tend to be more iterations of the easiest thing, idea or person to be, as the most likely outcome. It's just Entropy. So, if bad money does, indeed, drive out good, and if, likewise, dull repetitively inane vapid small talk ever does drown out novelty and value and thus bore silly and drive away potentially better contacts, then what less and how less deleterious can be the impact of maliciously deliberate pettiness upon our lives in driving out any hope of better at all?

    What all this means, sadly, is that there is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but never the bullies themselves. People who can't control themselves try control others instead, and frequently learn how to get away with it. Bullies force the people around them to accommodate the bullies own comfort and rationalizations. Terrorism as a Means of self-actualization denoting any savor in life, any sort of excellence in one's own experience thereof, especially by way of any sort of true productivity, and that just such self-actualization will always tend to come under assault one way or another unless adequately defended. The exception to that rule being where the easiest way to have anything good in life is concerned, namely to simply prey upon the vulnerable. After all, have we not all heard of the banality of evil?

    Victimology Theory - on Lycos Retriever

    As long as there is impunity and any motivation or incentive of any kind whatsoever to deviously take undue advantage by violating the rights of others, then a certain population percentage will deviously take undue advantage by violating the rights of others even routinely and consistently. Moreover, as proverbial birds of a feather indeed flocking together, drawn together in the eager exchange of malicious gossip by which to share and promote vulnerable targets of bullying, amoral sociopathic bullies network and cooperate in evil doing fairly readily. -Conspiracy indeed, but at the grass roots.

    1 in 4 child bullies will grow to have a criminal record. Bullying and theft, violence and trickery of every kind, are only ancient and successful strategies in human society no less than in nature, especially toadying to the powerful while beating down and scapegoating the competition, the lowest common denominator appealed to by demagogues. Alas, there is no shortage of natural dedication and man-hours whole heartedly devoted to pettiness and sheer spite in this world. There is never a gap in volunteerism, so long it's for injustice and destruction.

    Surely, if the Devil had to pay minimum wage, Hell would go bankrupt!

    The rugged and transcendently self sufficient Ubermench remains a myth. In truth, the inferior tends to dominate the superior. Indeed, as the saying goes, no matter how bad you are, there will be someone who is worse simply because they think they are better.

    The challenge in defense of personal individuality in life has always been not only to navigate another path as ever needed for whatever reason, but to establish social support and alternative supply chains, connections, alliance and defense. And it is the widespread failure to accomplish this, all things being equal let alone in the face of cliquish bullying, harassment and isolation, that perpetuates the crisis. Because, evidently, not everyone who ever feels alienated or finds themselves excluded, for whatever reason or under any circumstances, can rise all that well to such a challenge. Especially if one finds oneself actually hounded, one way or another.

    Also, there may be any number of other separate problems and complications unaddressed to obstruct even whatever seems so practical and straightforward adaptation to others. Because life and people are like that. Indeed, any adaptation of an individual may seem, metaphorically speaking, like cutting the foot to fit the shoe, whereas, of course, it is the proverbial shoe that needs to fit for the comfort of the wearer.

    What, then, is the alternative? Building cultures of respect, inclusive societies, on the basis of the highest principles and most functional empathy and attachment has never quite been accomplished.

    And yet, so often, the approach to self help in social integration, even in the face of the most flagrant bullying, assumes that the key, so to speak, is already there to be found and turned. But, quite often, such helpful encouragement towards social adaptation fails for any number of reasons. And this suggests that such an approach might not be adequate in all cases, for any number of reasons, none the least being because there might not be any "key" lying around, as it where. Bullies do not need to be so reasonable, let alone kindly and accepting.

      Dealing With Manipulative People - protractedly escalating ambient or stealth abuse

    As Carl von Clausewitz warns us, “The aggressor is always peace-loving; he would prefer to [bully] unopposed.” They are the enemy, after all! And, as grand as it may be to befriend one's enemy, one's enemy will only be befriended should they so decide. Enemies can only really become friends first establishing peace. In the meantime, the enemy is no friend, and it is grave folly to behave otherwise and to surrender all initiative. As Masha Gessen said on CNBC, Whenever you have a good faith actor on one side, and a bad faith actor on the other, the bad faith actor is in a position to win. After all: “A friend means well, even when he hurts you. But when an enemy puts his hand round your shoulder - watch out!”  — Proverbs 27:6 Indeed, Sun Tzu observes that if the enemy seeks peace or opens negotiations unexpectedly, they are actually scheming, and that apology and humility likely just a delaying ploy playing for time and respite to regroup. Moreover: "To fail to take the battle to the enemy when your back is to the wall is to perish."

    “You can shoot the tiger, or stay out of his way, but you cannot pronounce him a vegetarian.”  —  Richard Mitchell

    And so, the need for better strategy must be addressed. Including alternative supply chains, connections, alliance and mutual defense by which to intimidate bullies more reliably. Social Darwinism is unacceptable. But that's no excuse not to rise to the challenge thereof. Therefore, let us begin by confronting the Hobbesian ugly truth: 

    The niches of all opportunistic bullies, predators and parasites tend to be stable and lie along their path of least resistance. Such niches are provided by opportunity, the prey or host or target of bullying, purposefully or by chance, locating anyone who is vulnerable. Moreover, threat and manipulation tend to eventually render one or another distraught and vulnerable target's responses even the more amenable to predation, exploitation and parasitism.

    Bullies are domineering, vengeful, Sadistic, and solve whatever their problems by overt violence and intimidation or other more covert destructive tactics. Bullies achieve recognition and what passes for respect, even while actually becoming disliked and resented, all through hostility, and naturally proliferate where dominance is tolerated if not valued and power struggle is the accepted way of things.

    It is all too often observed that the successful make the rules to their own advantage and to keep the rest of us playing their looser game as their pawns and fools. Where naked mayhem and brutality can no longer stand, not mere coercion alone, but deception and misleading manipulation of others broadly, has become central to the organization of modern society, not only in politics but also in the economic relationships served.

    Bullying is often classified as either strategic, a coercive means towards any self serving benefit or goal put forth, or else otherwise driven or motivated by character, whether by initiative or in response to whatever situation, opportunity or conflict as may ever arise. The principle types and tactics of bullying populating the bullying circle, are the violence and intimidation of Physical Bullies, most obviously, but also varying degrees of mimesis, while Verbal Bullies employ threats and abuse, the typically highly socially adept Relational Bully continually scheming and instigating to undermine and isolate the target of bullying socially, and no less deceptive or devious, the passive or covert aggressor, a coworker, peer or colegue of any sort ,who sabotages, deceives or exploits the target of bullying by simple noncooperation, and Reactive Victims, ever manifesting the most blatant projection and constantly triggered by slights -real, exaggerated or entirely imagined. But, of course, rationalizations of grudge collecting are hardly uncommon in bullies unless, as often, they are just gloating Sadists outright, who tend to prefer scapegoating and victim blaming of whatever vulnerability of the target of bullying, singling out of the most trivial of difference and scapegoating rationalizations of invented threat to society and especially feminine "virtue" and other such typical taboo, also typical to the folly and sanctimonious abuse of power characteristic of the politician bully. Indeed, even while gaining impunity as bullies, mania and undue volatility even to the point of self-indulgence aside, or even simple over stress, as actual targets of deliberate bullying themselves, Reactive Victims may be resented the more for fighting back at all. Hence, fairness is not merely abrogated, but actually reversed! Indeed, the awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity.

    Bullying is everywhere, as is abuse of power and victim blaming. And there may be no recourse. Indeed, whatever authorities if any at all, may be a part of the problem. Verbal harassment, in whatever circumstance or by whatever medium of transmission, includes name-calling, put downs and even Sexual Harassment and threats or via whatever devious orchestration, simply finding oneself drawn, haplessly and unwillingly, into all manner of unpleasantness. Physical bullying includes violence, physical intimidation, theft, vandalism and even sexual abuse. Slippery, covert, therefore often most difficult to recognize and deal with, Social or Relational Bullying includes ostracism, exclusion, shunning, and malicious gossip. Likewise elusive and covert, is sheer psychological intimidation: dirty looks, individual or often even collectively organized stalking, manipulation, unpredictable hostility. The target may wonder how much is real, and how much is only in their mind! And, one way or another, cyberbullying and flaming include just about anything short of physical violence (for obvious reasons), via email, on social networking sites or even malicious hacking and identity theft.

    .com  

     Also see: The 4 most-common workplace bullies and bully bosses  

        •  Stopping the Bully Cycle

        •  Guide to bully types and tactics populating the bullying circle,

        •  Are Bullies Sabotaging Your Ability to Compete?
                       Woody Allen said that “Eighty percent of success is showing up.” But not for targeted individuals of serial bullying and ostracism. It's worse than invisibility!

        •  WhistleBlowing  - the Psychodynamics of conflict
      
      When friendship is not good for your mental health

     Put the whistleblowers in charge!

     

    The Ugly Truth of standing alone

    For an extreme and lethally violent example of how bullying stays prevalent, one need only consider how, as a matter of craven vested interest, opportunism, power and ambition, terrorists routinely murder not only the so called "moderates" within their own ranks and amide their affiliations, but also peaceful activists and protestors among their own constituents as "traitors" and sabotage perfectly competent peaceful demonstrations in order to turn them violent so that the terrorists can continue to hypocritically declare diplomacy a hopelessly lost cause leaving terror as last resort of the underdog!

    All such tactics insure that destructive behavior gets more attention than constructive behavior, while victimized dissidents may despair of even being noticed to be helped. In the end, oppressive and hypocritical government officials often may far prefer to negotiate with criminal terrorists, the former demonized enemy magically turning statesmen and even nation builder, than to acknowledge, answer to and work with the struggling and oppressed or their Intellectuals.

    And no one cares.

    Indeed, every rabid running dog, every vicious foreign policy tool that ever seemingly bit the hand the feeds them, may eventually come round again in due course, and make themselves useful again, one way or another.

    Cynical governments and political hacks by far prefer to embrace terrorists as statesmen and nation builders if it helps them to ignore and keep obscure legitimate peaceful pro-democratic activists and intellectuals who might actually improve conditions for the people. Bullies on the world stage may like to put on a great and deadly show of factional conflict, but it's all just a propaganda squeeze play, higher stakes mimesis, with protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse. a cult con game to press the people into choosing up sides, however interchangeable, to make cannon fodder and exploit emotionally unbalanced suicidal would be martyrs.

    Indeed, Che Guevara well understood the symbiosis behind oppositional violence, openly declaring in his writings that the whole point of insurgency and appalling acts of terrorism is, by that very threat and alarm, to enable the Fascists ever waiting in the wings to drive the government into heavy handedness, so as, in turn, and as the intended and desired end result, to radicalize the populace to be recruited into the Revolution. And, indeed, conversely, even fairly recent history teaches us that if terrorists do not exist, government conspirators will incubate them. Terrorism, then, may even be regarded as nothing more that a sort of violent sham opposition.

    Moreover, by contrast, the truly progressive are conveniently easy to ignore in all the confusion. Once again, nice guys finish last!

    Indeed, in many a context constructive behavior is often sabotaged and undermined, one way or another. Anti-competitive bullying is an unfair competitive advantage robbing the world of better alternatives.

    Certainly bullies in the workplace, for a more common place and somewhat less lethal example, help to suppress superior innovation. Indeed, a common form of passive/aggressive covert/hostile bullying in the workplace or whatever context of collaborative endeavor, is simply stonewalling urgent memos, regardless of the cost or damage to the bottom line or whatever other motivated goals ever put forth in common. The classic toxic manager is well known for sabotaging the contribution of coworker targets of bullying and then to belittle their efforts. And even in grade school abusiveness is better rewarded with attention than any constructive accomplishment let alone the effort in the attempt or groundwork in the mean time.

    "Writing comes more easily if you have something to say." to quote Sholem Asch. And while this may come as a good warning against triviality, it also happens that one can be stymied in addressing very important problems. And in such case, one must hope that one will be afforded at least the luxury of admitting it. Because that, at least, gives the writer something to say. One just such daunting problem is that of bullying.

    To address grievances including bullying there is the administration at school and internal procedure and policy in the work place, plus Labor Union grievance process, all often more a part of the problem and a grinding ordeal besides, further breaking down the target of bullying and protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, abuse, than any redress, only postponing and even subverting the final uncertain and costly ordeal of legal recourse. But the standard crocodile tears, facile helpless heartless "Arafat speak" and official victim blaming of scapegoats are all well documented at so many other anti-bullying websites, studies and literature. Suffice to add that attrition and manipulation into unilateral Soft Bargaining is known in Transactional Analysis as the "let's you be reasonable" Ulterior Transaction or headgame.

    And aside from societally provided means of redress, there are only whatever personal resources and contacts of the individual, adequate to help intimidate bullies from targeting them. Or else not! After all, bullies tend to prey upon the more vulnerable and isolated. Indeed, the aim of exclusion by covert relational hostility is to sabotage the all important social connectivity of the target. In short, the reason that there cannot be a better resource guide for the bullied, against harassment and social isolation, is that there are more often than not, no resources to speak of!

    That is why it is always far easier seeking to reach out and educate concerned employers, educators and officials in whatever authority, who therefore have any the wherewithal to fight such injustice as it arises, along with any motivation to help bully-proof the institutions in which they work, than to advise the actual hapless targets of bullying. Not to suggest, however, that the course is clear even for the authorities. 'Why Psychology is Failing to Solve the Problem of Bullying' offers perhaps a particularly alarming apologetics in defense of scapegoating and victim blaming of the bullied in school, well reasoned from true points, pointing out confusion in the various perspectives upon bullying, advocating the value of resilience and teaching to cope for oneself in life and arguing how encouraging students to report (dare not say: "rat out") bullying, and thence intervention can readily just incur fresh resentment and only escalate conflict. But instead of continually raising the stakes and to no avail, there is a more effective intervention unconsidered, infuriatingly mild, measured and consistent punishment, that so cunningly annihilates all the motivating social benefits that bullying accrues for bullies, effectively thwarts all further actingout of resentments, and patiently reshapes more constructive behavior:

    Learn more about: The Playground Pass System.

    Though Behavior Modification, the Playground Pass System is not manipulative. The coercion and disapproval are undisguised. And the sanctions are quite appropriate, given failure of sweet reason in defense of the bullied. Bullying thrives in neglect and secrecy. By so publicly infantilizing the serial bully under such constant supervision, the punishment to fit the crime, the Playground Pass System inflicts the one harm that serial bullies cannot abide, by rendering bullies and bullying just so completely impotent and uncool! The bully stripped of power and seen by all in such humiliation and subject to mockery, stands to lose all popularity, standing, power and esteem that are the rewards motivating bullying to begin with. Bullies subject to Transactional Antithesis of the Playground Pass System quickly know that the administration respects the rights of students not to be bullied (at least not by fellow students) and unambiguously means business because bullies simply will not be free to bully, and so bullies then back down very quickly, even while the stakes remain fairly low.

    Perhaps, in truth, bullying is tolerated precisely because bullying is so divisive, and thereby helps keep the student population so oppressed! Discipline, coercion, to motivate education, is a doomed enterprise, as well understood even from antiquity. But discipline should not be so neglected in protection of civil rights and keeping the peace. Too bad the Playground Pass System hasn't caught on more.

    And alas that bullying in society at large, rather than just in such institutions of school and employment, remains even all the more under addressed, except for the special case of the persecution of minorities, hate crimes targeted against any recognized legal class. Legal action against bullying as discrimination, doesn't quite fit, and only wears down the complainant to no avail. It's just bass-akwards and won't fit! Only in Ireland, does the law classify even discrimination as merely bullying by class, a special case of bullying to begin with. Although, at least, throughout the Western world,  the plight of those hounded, harassed and intimidated by a hostile threatening or even possibly violent neighbor, and even finally being forced to sell and move house, is finally beginning to come to light. And none too soon. Electronic harassment currently seems no more than a paranoid conspiracist urban myth. But, mark my words, it's only a matter of time before a particularly vicious neighbor bully resorts to belligerent ultrasound technology quite easily assembled entirely off the shelf from Radio Shack.

    In society, institutions are established to deal with various social problems. Institutions that adapt and evolve. Clique Busters, as proposed, is conceived as a different kind of institution, a subversive counter-conspiracy rather than just an interest group or adjunct to absent, failed or downright corrupted authority so rife with abuse of power.

    The reasons for this are two fold:
    First of all, because when it comes to bullying, the pertinent authorities are so often a major part of the problem in such formal context as school or employment, let alone world affairs. Or else, because there is often no particular authority to turn to in many informal social contexts when bullying is rampant. And so, absent constraint of civility, what then? CliqueBusters is conceived as an
    exploration of innovative new agency towards civility. But first taboo must be broken, and honest conversation undertaken.

     

     

    The lonely perils of individuality

    “Let us face ourselves bravely as we are. For only a philosophy that recognizes reality can lead us into true happiness, and only that kind of philosophy is sound and healthy.” 
     Lin Yutang

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    After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. Aside from the ubiquitous problems of social loafing, bystander apathy, Anti-Critical Bias, cowardice lacking assertive honesty, function in the social network is simply inadequate to the needs of many people even in the lulls much less in their times of tribulation and struggle or the aftermath, and tends to be unresponsive simply from sheer inefficiency. The more so after social connectivity is damaged and subverited by scheming and masterfully socially adept covert relational hostility. As long as opportunity is tenuous to begin with, bullies can render the difficult impossible.

    More over, it becomes clear that first socially isolating the target makes it far easier to lie convincingly, thus drastically increasing vulnerability to criminal exploitation, particularly fraud as well as violence and extortion. Indeed, by contrast, the most destructive people, of course, often seem to be so very well connected, all the time! Whether they are mean spirited socially prominent student cliques, spousal abusers, petty thugs, crooked cops or corporate lobbyists and public officials.

    Alas, that we must all eke out survival support and pass the time in an indifferent universe, even from a hostile social environment. There is little choice. What say can have the invisible and the unloved? What debt is owed them and by whom? So who can criticize the passive indifference of sheer unfriendliness? And once the isolation of unpopularity sets in, what is there to check the steady progress of of shunning into active hostility of mobbing and ostracism? What have I ever done to you? -wonder the targets thereof. The answer: You exist. Worse, you don't take a hint when not so much as a hint is preferred! To escape notice, you should slink away and move on when you first feel the chill. And when we pursue, you must move on again. For you are marked.

    Often, the targets of bullying are simply admonished to toughen up! Of course, that only means adaptation, one way or another, to the status quo. But bullying is intrinsically impossible to adapt to. That is the entire point! Rather, what is needed is to play hard ball and achieve real progress. To force the bullies to be tougher on themselves, and the less self indulgent with their hostile impulses and self serving abuse. People who can't control themselves try control others instead, and frequently learn how to get away with it. Bullies force the people around them to accommodate the bullies own comfort and rationalizations.

    I respectfully submit that, victim blaming and scapegoating aside, good people often do very much need to take responsibility for our failure to seek some way to find and implement an adequate societal mode of connectivity, with it's own memetic propagation and it's own defenses, so as to become effective and competitive with the ancient and obscene advantages of dominance and predation. Because as things stand the current situation leaves all such advanced acquired traits as the enlightened and progressive so cherish, at a significant short term social Evolutionary disadvantage. And this is detrimental to all rational Humanist democratic social progress.

    And so, the apologists for the bullies may even be correct in their excuses that it is the responsibility of the oppressed, exploited and forgotten to adapt. The question is whether those very traits which that we value can be adaptive to the threat they so often confront, rather than only a handicap of dissidence and principle that the cowardly intolerant conformists simply advocate be sacrificed for the sake of fitting in with status quo so that bullies, enablers and submissive victims can all effectively be recruited continually, thereby.  

    In other words, we want to be free, individual and good, but at all autonomous, without being helpless and vulnerable and of no use to ourselves or anyone else. In short, to bring under control the sacrifice of being true to oneself. To establish a more secure position. One aspect of predation, exploitation, dominance and bullying, is that they are proactive, responsive and benefit from connectivity and collusion. And that they subsume the society which they infest and propagate while marginalizing the competing opposition. Not only do predation and dominance propagate among the predators and oppressors, but oppression also propagates among the oppressed. 

     

     

    Sinister toxic predatory grooming and exploitation within bullying cliques

    Predators often declare their vigilante altruism while fallaciously demonizing the competition as predatory. Outreach to assist and protect the vulnerable and the hunt for targets to victimize have so much in common strategically and procedurally, that the latter is so readily rationalized as the former. Alas, much as with career or social advancement generally, even romantic success may more often actually be predicated less upon spontaneity and courtship between free agents and more in grooming of an individual as in: sometimes to train even by behavioral conditioning and brainwash, to at least seemingly befriend and lower emotional defenses, all in development or preparation, as in teaching or mentorship for a specific position, rôle or purpose. Such grooming of an individual may be undertaken by any individual mentor or patron, or by any wider social circle. Grooming in this sense is distinct from yet may entail "primate grooming rituals" of consensual validation. Whereas social embedment in a functional social circle is beneficial in networking, wherein members genuinely strive to be helpful and supportive in the exchange of contacts and introductions, advantageous and desirable to one another, sinister toxic predatory grooming as typically conducted by bullying cliques may also provide introductions, but in order to exploit the individual sexually and emotionally in flagrant hypocritical self-service, only via immersion and cultlike isolation within the group, all steeped in conditionality and indoctrination, following whatever seldom stated exploitative ulterior agenda in grooming suitable candidates into their orbit for whatever roles of subordinacy and victimization or complicity and enablement, and driving others apart by whatever manipulative intrigues and intimidation. Standard Pimpology: Isolate and dominate.

    Serial Relational Bullies may also be said by terrorizing and socially isolating their targets of bullying, to be grooming them only for escalating stages of hostility and abuse. Not long suppressed, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility.

    "It's for your own good, dear" Hypocritical cockblockers ever feigning knight errantry, blithely demonize competing suitors, often grooming their vulnerable targets of exploitation, sometimes even going so far as pandering to dysfunctional family of the target for grooming and exploitation, not by social support or acts or kindness for the needy, but by closing ranks with the most socially accepted and destructive, even potentially violent, of all cockblockers, abusively domineering and possessive parents.

    All manner of criminal predators when entering any new social environment, always seek out influential cliques and curry cronyistic abused power for assistance and protection, by running the Affinity Scam, pandering to any group of people taking pride in whatever perceived shared identity or characteristics, hence good standing and trust to be exploited within the group, plus with bullying cliques, common enemies, vulnerable targets of bullying already isolated and dystressed, veritably served up on a silver platter.

     

    Veritable informal cults are often the norm 
    Contrary to the ugly stereotypes of the lone predator, real human predators are typically chameleonic. Bullies tend to associate with and learn from one another. Sociopathic, they tend to heteronomy, lacking the autonomy and self knowledge which is moral bedrock. Bullies are more often over socialized than under socialized. Such is a cult mentality in which they normalize and co-validate.

    A crony is a friend, associate, or a person, who works for someone in authority, especially one who is willing to dishonestly exchange howsoever immoral and unethical help and assistance, toxic grooming and generally rigging the game under any hypocritical pretense. There is tremendous advantages in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you. Cronyism is partiality to long-standing association, in all manner of collusion, but especially by appointment to positions of authority regardless of qualification. Hence, cronyism exists when the appointer and the beneficiary are in social contact and particularly when therefore as all too often, the appointer is inadequate to hold his or her own job or position of authority, and for this reason appoints individuals who will never try to weaken them or even express views contrary to those of the appointer. Indeed, in the words of Pietro Verri, Precetti di Caligola a Claudio (1786): “I do not advise to choose individuals infamous for their dissoluteness and discredited by the people, but I advise you to choose mediocre men, of dubious morals, secretly depraved such that they execute what is ordered without any ambiguity.” 

    Hence, all cronyism, so rewarding of sycophancy and so often actually punishing of excellence, is mediocre and contrary in practice and principle to all meritocracy. Indeed, in local politics, when the masses of the electorate remain attached to long-standing association, far from benefiting from any corruption, the masses of the electorate simply suffers from too much pity to effectively fire dear friends who are nevertheless incompetent public servants though groomed as pillars of the community, from their accustomed positions of power. Let us dub that phenomena: popular cronyism, more oppression propagating amongst the oppressed. For all these reasons, politically, the very word 'cronyism' is generally disparaging. And when success in business comes increasingly to depend upon close relationships between business people and government officials, this is crony capitalism. Totalitarianism is seen to begin when blatant cronyism and brazen corruption not only dominate but officially emerge into the open. This first stage of dictatorship is often called: economic Fascism.

    But cronyism need not be governmental at all. Cronyism in principle may occur relative to any conceivable abuse of power, even however private sector and even quite unofficial. Indeed, the further from government cronyism manifests, and the less actually at stake in the larger scheme of things, therefore all the greater determination of cliquish cronies to dominate and, for all intents and purposes, to govern oppressively. And such cliquish cronyism therefore tends all the more to monopolism, with tremendous investment in the suppression and destruction of free competition, socially, of all genuine spontaneity in very principle, by whatever disruption, intimidation and abuse of power and covert relational hostility necessary to the task, hence all too often, from the depths of self-serving hypocrisy, the most insane killjoy prudery, rampant cockblocking and brutal slut shaming of typical sexual trade unionism. In short, bullying cliques exist in order to provide manipulative and domineering bullies with reciprocal support and assistance in the cultivation and maintenance of controlling and exploitative relationships.

    Bullying cliques are distinguishable from cults proper, in that cults, however deluded, may tend to be altruistic, striving to save the world and serve God. Whereas bullying cliques are typically driven by chronyism and the sense of superiority and entitlement just as with any hate group, excewpt that they target vulnerable individuals instead bulying by class, groups or categories. 

    In the words of Arthur H. Vandenberg: "It is less important to redistribute wealth than it is to redistribute opportunity." But cronyistic backbiting and covert relational hostility undermine reputation and hence the quest for recognition, obscuring the true character and value of the target of bullying from public perception, assuring as a consequence, social isolation and powerless unmet needs, generally preventing redistribution of opportunity. Such is the conduct of cliques of bullies who just don't think that life is fair unless they have everything and all others have nothing, not even one another, so that two complete newbies must never dare so much as shake hands until properly introduced, much less set a hot date! Such bullying cliques exist only in order to position themselves as the efrctive gatekeepers in the proverbial only game in whatever metaphorical town, so that all others must become cronies too, perpetually currying their favor for acceptance, access and connections, business, social and romantic.

    All such pervasive, ubiquitous and banal cronyism panders to and exploits actual human motivation that is often neither from intrinsic arousal in whatever the doing for its own sake, nor even merely extrinsic for whatever hoped for payoff. Especially in social life and most especially as opposed to career pursuit, people tend to react unconsciously: viscerally, habitually and prejudicially, "on autopilot," rather than in thinking considered response. For people by in large are neither just impulsive nor are they opportunistic and/or cautious rational agents. Rather their compelling motivation may turn out to be such as will be found in whatever their perception of vested interest, of which even the ongoing self justification, however deranged and hypocritical, that is called: Existential Validation is only an aspect. Vested interest is whatever personal stake or special interest in protecting or promoting that whereof derives howsoever perceived personal benefit or advantage. And the heteronomy of cronyism naturally heighten that perception. Even what little that passes for moral restrictions at all, may largely reflect the individual vested interest in whatever social order that in turn at all both intimidates and protects said individual by whatever much the same credible threat. People often become motivated only by buying into indoctrination, by internalizing extrinsic motivators, one way or another into whatever particular investment of sacrifice. And people are notoriously reluctant to let loose of past sacrifice invested, no matter how clearly in vein. Otherwise, should indoctrination and sublimation fail, coercion alone accrues alienation and depression. And this is why faith is so prized: Because it promotes the heteronymous illusion of belonging.

    Galatians 4:17 [King James Bible]: They zealously affect you, but not well; yea, they would exclude you, that ye might affect them. [Young's Literal Translation]: they are zealous for you -- yet not well, but they wish to shut us out, that for them ye may be zealous; [International Standard Version]: These people who have been instructing you are devoted to you, but not in a good way. They want you to avoid me so that you will be devoted to them. [New Heart English Bible]: They zealously seek you, but for no good purpose; they desire to alienate you, that you may be zealous for them. [Aramaic Bible in Plain English]: They imitate you, not for what is excellent but because they want to oppress you that you would imitate them.
     

    Whatever is ever truly invested in the individual may reflect what is vested in said individual by others. In particular, in a truly functional circle of friends, networking by others on behalf of an individual ideally best and most straightforwardly serves the interests, preferences, needs and desires of said individual in true and abiding autonomy supportive respect. Alas more often, within the attachment disordered racket of exploitative cliques, there arises considerable moral hazard, being: circumstances in which one party, with impunity, insulated from risk, is prone to act on another's behalf expending whatever that other's resources, tangible or intangible, in advance of entirely any other agenda than simply the best interests, preference, needs and desires of the individual ostensibly served. And the individual so exploited, in rationalizing cognitive dissonance often simply makes do actually because of their own fearful prior investment of sacrifice and vested interest accrued. Thus are individuals so often manipulatively deceived, included and brought together or excluded and wedged apart for various scheming exploitative advantage of amoral sly self serving sociopathic Relational Bullies, hypocritical gang stalking predatory cockblockers and worse. And aside, for good or ill, from networking within whatever fateful social embedment, there remain whatever readily available alienating and lonely avenues of futile outreach that truly only exist for whatever socially institutionalized ulterior agendas and rackets. A racket, after all, is any dishonest scheme or ongoing transaction, all not as it contrives to present itself and as is tacitly accepted or endured by the majority of those involved, but in actuality a scam or fraud, a deceptive practice of coercion and manipulation conducted for the benefit of a few cronies at the expense of the many. Get with the program: The program never fails. You fail the program! The masses will always comply in ever greater effort and diligence jumping through hoops and fighting amongst ourselves for scraps, believing and rationalizing just about anything, all in order to obtain whatever artificial scarcity and bait-and-switch, no matter how plainly contrived.

    Cliquishness is all about cockblocking, constantly driving wedges between different people and keeping us all down. Particularly but not limited to those assimilated, isolated, abused and exploited within the herd/cult-like clique, and those ostracized, isolated, abused and exploited on the margins of the social network, once the bonds of sociability have been eroded away. Tactics and rationalizations of covert relational hostility and disorientating ambient or stealth abuse. Only the more volatile and hypocritical where sex and Sexism are involved, but essentially no different.

    In order to advance their standing, Bullies may lay in wait for others to slip up. Ah, but bullying itself is no faux pas, precisely because it is maliciously deliberate. Of course, this flies in the face of the opposing ideals of Civility, where in, on the contrary, honor and esteem accrue in actually helping one another to save face, especially in matters of little moment.

    Slut shaming extorts terrified passive bystanding from women, then taken as accent by silence, in order to permit cockblocking of prospective romantic rivals. In turn, via the engineering of sheer malignant propinquity, cockblocking socially isolates women within cliques of slut shaming cockblocking bullies and cronies. Conniving and domineering cockblockers are self righteous and pimp-like, in that they cultivate influence by controlling associations between others. Just such covert relational bullies, as moralistic self appointed chaperones and gate keepers, are quick to portray themselves as public servants and their targets as paranoid delusional cases who actually bring their difficulties upon themselves. Thus hypocritical covert relational bullies love to seize the high moral ground in the most shameless faux night errantry, by intervening unasked supposedly on behalf of any third parties, often taken by surprise and startled into silence, in order to publicly treat the target of bullying, whom the bullies actually hound, as a pest. But among the leading causes of feelings of persecution, remains actual persecution. And far from bearing any underlying redeeming agenda, cockblocking abusive covert relational bullies hate their scapegoats and competitors the more should they succeed socially then should they fail.

    Generally impugning motive and thus leaving grievance the more vague and damaging, rebuff of the target of bullying is cited to reinforce the depiction of the targeting of bullying as a pest and an undesirable, while positive response to outreach on the part of the target bullying is cited to reinforce depiction of the target of bullying as predatory or a bottom feeder, depending upon the social standing of the other party.

    There are those who investigate the universe and those who investigate the human condition. But a sycophantic bully only needs to know which way the wind blows. Bullies deal fabricated social reality of consensus manipulation. And no one is ever expected to double check malicious gossip. No matter how vague, suspect, or damaging. Truth and justice are not even values in play, but actually taboo. And yes, it would seem that one pariah can, indeed, contaminate another pariah, in the warped sensibility of bullythink! Indeed, the cliquish mentality is well known for it's scorn towards all who would offer aid and comfort to the targets of bullying. Anyone who even begins to accept the target of bullying will often be deemed one way or another helpless, fragile, callow and naive at best, and in urgent need of rescue or warning! -And, of course, the sense of all such memetically adversative "warning" is always purposefully ambiguous, as whether this is a simple caution regarding the target of covert relational hostility, however vague, dishonest, untrue, malicious and unjust, or domineering and cynically controlling peer pressure, a very, very thinly veiled threat indeed, to deter all others from free association with the target of covert relational hostility; while speaking of "rescue" or "protection" is obliviously euphemistic in obfuscation and rationalization of a possessive sense of appropriation or, failing that, destructive sense sabotage and vandalism of sociable conductivity, motivated by a deep seated jealous rage.

    Hence social blunders may even be deemed the less intrusive than successful connection. Bullying covert relational hostility is then justified as pro-social vigilantism! Obsessive dedication in covert relational hostility and Harassment is then seen as socially constructive and, by just such victim blaming, scapegoating becomes self justifying. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. And of course serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail. Indeed, fanatical and sanctimonious bullies, instead of tiring and losing interest in their malicious sport, often come to actually feel themselves weary and burdened by their scapegoats and by the obligation of sheer tiresome and wasted effort of unremitting persecution! For, in the words of Bernard Shaw, "When a stupid man is doing something he is ashamed of, he always declares that it is his duty."

    Bullies, then, are consistent in their unremitting behavior, but their actual conduct belies their own habitual excuses and rationalizations. Because, shameless Relational Bullies not only opportunistically leap into action to rub salt in every wounds of incidental awkward rejection and to search and destroy even in advance, all opportunities of the target of bullying for interpersonal networking, but will go to any shocking or devious lengths to disrupt any and all positive interactions with the target of bullying as ever they may still arise. Be the aforesaid third parties known at all to the bullies or even complete strangers, unscrupulous would be suitors and playas, jealous cockblocking Transactional schlemiels actingout, or often even bizarre and prudish loony ideologues on the attack. 

    In accordance with social learning theory, just as with any other behavior sets, bullies bully because of their association with other bully's and cronies. The behaviors are thus reinforced and they learn beliefs that are favorable to bullying. As eager and sycophantic cronies, they associate with bullies as rôle models and come to view bullying as something desirable or justifiable in certain situations. Association with other bullies is the best predictor of serial bullying other than prior serial bullying. Social learning theory postulates that there are three mechanisms by which individuals learn to engage in behaviors such as serial bullying: differential reinforcement, beliefs, and rôle modeling. Differential reinforcement means that individuals can teach others by reinforcing whatever behavior sets and punishing others. And nothing intensifies differential reinforcement quite like cronyism, replete with twisted values, reward and punishment, all reinforcing rôle modeling. Bullying is more likely to occur when so frequently reinforced and infrequently punished. Such considerable degrees of reinforcement and advantage with little punishment, bullying is more likely to be reinforced than any other observable behavior sets. As under prevail ant cult-like cronyism, bullying that has and continues to be reinforced, is therefore all the more likely. Bullying and cronyism unpunished persist.

    As well as reinforcing serial bullying, other bullies can also teach or transmit rationalizations that are favorable to bullying. Values favoring bullying fall into three categories. First is the approval of certain minor forms of bullying, intimidation and deceit. Second is the approval of or justification of more serious serial bullying. Such people believe that bullying is generally wrong, but that some acts of bullying are justifiable or even desirable under certain circumstances as in whatever perception of insult or provocation, often quite flexible and volatile. Third, really hardcore bullies hold certain general values that are more conducive to serial bullying and make bullying appear as a more attractive alternative to other ways of life. Indeed, more thrill seeking and Sadistic bullies, desiring also quick and easy advancement and connection in social life by throwing their weight around and undermining all potential competition, all with such disdain for the rights of others, might therefore evaluate bullying more favorably. Behavior is not only a product of values and reinforcements or
    punishment that individuals receive. Bullying is also inspired by the conduct of those around us. Individuals often rôle model or imitate the behavior of others, especially if it is someone that individual looks up to or admires. For example, an individual who witnesses someone they admire constantly bullying, and who is constantly reinforced for bullying, is then the more likely to follow suit. And of course, bullies tend to surround themselves with other bullies and cronies and to reject and isolate themselves from opposing influences.

     

     

     

    A dire warning regarding the lodging of police complaints, as ever applicable, at the police station:
    To begin with, a career in law informant is at least as attractive to thugly bullies throwing their weight around, as it is to true upstanding public servants. And the ill advised reactionary puritanical War on Vice has transformed the entire public into teaming masses of potential criminals. Indeed, speaking of sheer paranoid shitty attitude, police culture is rife with a cynical prevailing pessimistic us-against-the-world mentality, undermining ideals of service. Morale is typically extremely poor. "The job is shit" they so often complain amongst themselves. -The police, even if they are not just corrupt, are often plain lazy. The police are typically overworked and overwhelmed, and the temptation is great, by ready application the same most shockingly cold abusive hostility one might think reserved for interrogating the most contemptible criminal scum, simply to drive away as many new cases as possible, as they can get away with, typically the most vulnerable and needy of police assistance. Therefore:
     
    A tip: Police can be so much sweeter when you bring anyone with you to witness, an advocate, a co-complainant or just a friend for morale support, actually mostly to witness all dealings with the police and their conduct, and also (much as, with foresight, hard evidence such as pertinent video can also be most helpful), to provide social "proof" in corroboration of the reliability and veracity of a complainant who might otherwise seem at all nervous, hyperbolic and at all howsoever generally just a little sketchy. After all, generally speaking, instead of isolated paranoia, if only at all possible, cultivation of, and encouragement from, a good network of friends and support, will always be crucial to staying sane, focused, on the ball and proactive. The great hope of CliqueBusters in uniting in order to take action, is first of all to begin breaking the withdrawn isolation of those who suffer bullying, that only signals vulnerability to further abuse and rejection.

     

     

    Endless cat and mouse
     
    All to often, without the overwhelming deterrence of adequate connections, support and alliances, the only and costly apparent last resort to effectively deter persistent bullies at all may be to unambiguously sink to their level and win or even to loose a fist fight, but doing enough damage in the process none the less to make the bullies think twice in future. That is to say, depending on the cowardice of the bullies, and unless the social environment has become unremittingly violent or otherwise dangerous beyond caring, in which case, even successful self defense earns little respite. And if not actually by hand to hand brawling then by whatever due process or legal recourse, if available. Or else by any decisive initiative, which is to say, any threat or obstruction to livelihood or other vital interaction, overt or covert. But not in case of any hesitation, delay, trepidation or compunction, on the part of the target of bullying. Not if the bullies are sly and actually hope to provoke whatever retaliation or angry reaction, that will only provide all the more excuse for further abuse. Not while intelligence gathering against bullies is at all neglected and/or in any way hampered, and the only access to the bullies at all is by situations of contact wherein the unprotected target of bullying is pressed for restraint and civility unappreciated, abused and manipulated by the bullies.  

    Indeed, once a potential target of bullying exhibits social constraint or responsibility, never mind intimidation outright, the bully quickly realizes that, particularly in sheer bullying mimesis, he or she can safely maneuver the situation to the very brink of disgrace. The reticence of the target of bullying may arise from out of whatever reluctance, shock, paralysis, inability, situational deadlock, typical of "let's you be reasonable" headgames or conditioning, even authoritative deliberate remedial socialization and expectations, formal or informal. Counting upon the integrity of the victim's constraints to keep them both from tumbling over, the bully stands on the crumbling edges of socially acceptable behavior, agitating and pressing the target of bullying either to misstep and cross the line or else to effectively submit to ongoing and protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, abuse and distress because the target of bullying will often be in jeopardy, one way or another, should they give way to being baited. Thus are targets of bullying themselves made into passive bystanders to their own bullying! After all, wnat are the alternatives? Standing up to bullies and their cliques and getting them out of your face, only means that they redouble their efforts out of view and behind your back.

    Alas, submission only reinforces the behavior of an unpunished bully. The target of bullying exhibits an anxious vulnerability. The situation of mimesis is engineered wherein the target of bullying is set up as an easy target for later ongoing victimization and  scapegoating. The target of bullying suffers severe painful traumatic stress, fear and loss of control, that must eventually impair performance and achievement, a detriment and danger all to often underestimated in ongoing denial. Indeed, with the rise of youth violence, so too has the suicide rate increased.

    Worse, any perceived failure of the target of bullying to stick up for themselves tends to make others highly uncomfortable, thus the target of bullying will not be well liked, exacerbating social isolation. And it will be often true, as is often said, that the one shunned, indeed, has an attitude problem or just whatever indistinct bad vibe. After all, who wouldn't? Because bullying and shunning rapidly bring on the onset of depression, to paranoia if not actual hypervigilance, bitterness, misanthropy and other such acute mental conditions of distress. Obviously, people tend to keep their distance from such a one for fear that what they have might be contagious (which, indeed, it more often is), or for the sheer repulsiveness of their company, or for the rational fear of being associated with them. But alternatively, the target of bullying will typically only be the more resented as a spoilsport for lashing back in their own defense. If anything at all can be learned from observation, it is that whatever the price will be extracted for avoiding becoming such a wretch, it will most often be accepted by most people. The designation  of a target of bullying effectively creates a buffer for all others from falling into last place, socially.

    Hence, the targets of bullying will be rejected not only by the bully but their peers as well, drastically limiting the pool of potential social or business contacts. In other words, the isolation and ostracism via covert relational hostility is already well under weigh. And without connection and amid the anonymity of the masses, dangerous bystander apathy is vastly exacerbated and assertive honesty so badly undermined by social loafing. After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm.

    Generally, social, residential, familial, scholastic, professional needs, prior investment or circumstances compel the target of bullying into dealing with the bully at all, one way or another. Otherwise, given any better
    free choice, the target of bullying might very well simply prefer to disengage and just put all unpleasantness out of mind. More over, worldview, composure, presence of mind under fire, and social skill level and available resources might not provide the target of bullying viable alternatives beyond either submission or steady escalation of ongoing conflict on every level.

    Bullying, like evil generally, is simple that way. And most advantageous to the evil doer. Hence, evil succeeds and propagates. Because collusion among evil doers likewise comes naturally, along the path of least resistance, so long as evil people generally covet what they can get or keep from those whom they victimize but fear one another at all.

    And that is why collusion in bullying, among other evils, must be continually disrupted at every level of any open society or culture of respect. Clique Busters is conceived to attempt the ongoing disruption of bullying in ordinary day to day life, where the need has always been great and sorely neglected, and even to egg on the bullies to misstep, once and for all, and to reap the embarrassment that they have sown. Clique Busters pretty much follows the definition and characterization as laid out in the in the Bully/Victim Problems document, but goes beyond the prescribed solution, in seeking to institutionalize change societally, even if reform will not come from the top down as is often generally assumed.

    Hence, Clique Busters proposes independent investigation, intervention, consciousness raising and even covert counter-conspiracy.

    But any benevolence, by contrast with exploitation, quickly runs into Entropy. Benevolence of any kind expends personal resources (even just time and compassion) and stalls upon their depletion. And benevolence also depends upon the receptivity and cooperation of the intended beneficiary.

    At worst, benevolence opens the benefactor's own vulnerability to predators and parasites. But even short thereof, the intended beneficiary may prove to one degree or another unresponsive for any number of reasons:

    First of all, that the most needy and vulnerable are somehow so easy to find by exploitative bullies, but so hard to find and then to connect with for help, intervention or even sympathy. And that even then, benevolence may be in any degree misguided or inadequate, in any degree missing or falling short of the actual or self-perceived needs of the intended beneficiary. But also because the more that bullying threat and manipulation have rendered a vulnerable target's responses amenable to predation, exploitation and parasitism, the less amenable and competent their responses are to opportunity and help because ongoing threat and protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing and covert relational hostility, may tend to erode one's instincts and intuition. And, all to often, opportunity will be fleeting while tribulation will remain incessant.

    Likewise, helping oneself to begin with, may often entail effort and discomfort, especially taxing to anyone already distraught from bullying/predation/ exploitation/ parasitism. And this may still apply no less even given however valuable the offer of whatever outside advice, assistance or resources.

    Additionally, benevolence may easily face all manner of relentless direct third party sabotage, at little cost or risk to the saboteur, no matter whatever their vested interest or motivation in mimesis or just completely acting
    out  may be. Not to mention, in the worst case, should the intended beneficiary turn out to be, in actuality, one sort of deceptively parasitic bully or another with whatever ulterior agenda or dysfunction. -Or indeed, even n the very worst
    malignant optimism of the abused, any sort of submissive Masochist, exactly the weakest link in the chain that all fear to close ranks with, always pulling their punches, supplying aid and comfort to their own enemies, actually seeking only validation of a yearning for the guidance and approval of their very tormentors, and not simply to be at long last well rid of the abusers and put an end to protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, abuse. Of course, to further confuse matters, bullies, like rapists, often love to characterize targets of bullying as veritable Masochistic partners in courtship, no matter how unwelcome the bullies Sadism in actuality. And where others move tentatively for fear of whom to trust, and network with great difficulty, bullies flock together like birds of a feather, ever up to no good.

    In summation, for optimal success, benevolence requires adequate resources, best receptivity, comprehension and adaptability to the needs of the beneficiary and capable amenable response on the part of the intended beneficiary. Predators will always find the vulnerable before potential friends, allies, do-gooders and protectors. There are several reasons:
    Good and evil limit one another differently. Survival for all depends upon some upper limit upon evil. Within that envelope, every benevolence is often frustrated by intractable resistance. Do-gooders expend dwindling resources, whereas successful predators profit and proliferate. Good is fostered by reciprocity, often thwarted by defection (non reciprocation) networking difficulties and logistical obstacles often maliciously exacerbated, as well as day to day drains on personal and public resources and capital. Do-gooders network with difficulty, whereas the evil connects and
    cooperate readily and entrench themselves. And the vulnerable may be slow and inept to respond to help, whereas successful predators experience far less obstacles or scruples, and cooperate very smoothly, being well motivated by Sadism and personal gain.

    For good to overcome evil, these ubiquitous gaps must be fit and closed. Cost effective and sensible deterrence of evil at it's most petty must also be addressed, and not only the most drastic response as reserved against the most monstrous of deeds. Reciprocal networking must be improved and outreach to the vulnerable and abused must each be improved, routinely.

    And all of that inevitably tends to become exceedingly daunting and complicated. All in all, it's easy to understand Nietzsche's dread of responsibility and Altruism. -Of getting dragged in and sucked down with the drowning more often than saving them successfully. And this may apply to whatever familial and other responsibilities, without assuming additional burdens of charity or civic mindedness. However, reciprocity, reciprocal benevolence, mutual support of one kind or another, may improve sustainability over one sided benevolence. But attempts to build reciprocity may only tend to be even more complicated and vulnerable. So much so, that one may even be better off to do good works without expectation and the vulnerability of over extending oneself.

    Sun Tzu said: there is no loss worse than that of the initiative relinquished. And initiative means the power to create threats.

    The side with the initiative is usually also attacking. Against a threatening enemy, one has not only has the right but the obligation to attack upon any sign of weakness or opening. If one can create threats the enemy is weakened. This should be self-evident, and expected of the enemy. Yet many tend towards contempt of weakness and assume that one must have made some mistake to be put in any position of weakness. But clearly, and as we have seen in scapegoating, this can be vastly unfair because the side with the initiative controls the course of events. But keeping the initiative even when over matched requires creativity, whereas the opponent only has to react to threats. And yet, in everyone's experience, attacking is easier than defending, and, what is more, errors in defending tend to be more fatal, typically leading to defeats or great loss of resources. While errors in attacking usually only lose the initiative -- which, or course, in the long term may lead to defeat.

    The defender has less alternatives in choosing a plan. One might think that the effort of defense would therefore be easier, whereas, actually, choosing the right plan may be much more difficult for the defender. And this applies to all constructive endeavors including Altruism and Reciprocity. Because it is always easier to destroy than to build and thereby to put oneself on the defensive. Indeed, trying to help at all often principally entails seeking to counteract some harm, to defend against a destructive threat, in one sense or another. And it may often be unclear how best to endure, whereas there may be several ways for an attacker to win. Indeed, mounting, compounded and unforeseen dangers for anyone harassed and isolated by bullies.

    Emanuel Lasker said: "I keep on fighting as long as my opponent can make a mistake." Many brilliant attacks have proven better defendable only from hindsight, because the defender could have gained the advantage with some imaginative response. Indeed, any target of bullying will have many occasions to regret a missed strategic opening of one sort or another, lost in the disorientation and heat of the moment, which is always so much to the bullies' advantage and must be turned against them.

    In theory, every attack is over-optimistic; in practice, attacks are most likely to decide the outcome. Being proactive means being willing to win, which may make all the difference in many situations, if anything will at all.

    On the other hand, and seemingly contrary to Sun Tzu, the strategist Carl von Clausewitz actually emphasized the strategic aspects of defense. Because however strongly an offensive may start out, it inevitably weakens as it advances from its original base. Indeed, in the famous words of Helmuth von Moltke the Elder, noted disciple of Carl von Clausewitz: "No battle plan survives contact with the enemy." And yet, as Dwight D. Eisenhower so shrewdly points out, though plans are nothing, nevertheless planning is everything: The need to maintain the lines of supply and communications and to sustain numbers on the offense, which in this context must amount not only to keeping up unremitting harassment but also to reinforcing and sustaining social barriers to isolate the target of covert relational hostility, and moreover, to maintain all of these operations in an ever changing social environment. An ongoing and substantive effort which eventually may begin to show strain and degrade the aggressor clique's force. Because, indeed, even mimesis relies upon strength and coordination. Meanwhile, the defender target of bullying can fall back upon the sources of his strength, if any. Or, as is is all to often, if not, this is precisely where Clique Busters can come in, to fill that gap, to step in and provide any crucial emotional and tactical support to targets of bullying.

    And every offensive, however victorious, has a "culminating point." If the defender has enough time and space in which to recover, the aggressor inevitably reaches a point at which they must themselves take up the defense. For if they push too far, as bullies are wont, the equilibrium may even be shifted against them. -Especially considering how public opinion is more likely to favor the strategic defender, since significant conquests by one contender will threaten everybody else. Eventually, the conqueror will reach a "culminating point of victory" at which his successes may be exploited to provoke sufficient counteraction to defeat him.

    The aggressor, in their own retreat, must be prevented from drawing on the defender's usual sources of strength--physical or psychological. In other words, Clique Busters must redouble efforts to undercut support for entrenched bullies at such times. For at the tactical level, Carl von Clausewitz was impressed by the advantage of entrenchment. Indeed, the the essence of the defense is waiting: waiting until the attacker clarifies his own intentions; waiting until the balance of forces shifts; waiting for any improvement in the defender's situation, whether from the culminating process described above, from outside intervention, from mobilization of their own resources, or from some chance development. Time is almost always on the side of the defender, but not of the defenseless. For waiting, however, does not imply mere passivity, and a passive defense is not at all what Clausewitz was describing. His vision of any effective defense was profoundly active. If the defense functions essentially as a shield, it is best "a shield made up of well-directed blows." And then defense must shift at some point to the offense, the "flashing sword of vengeance." Thus it is easy to find in 'On War' isolated quotations which seem to glorify the offensive. It is nonetheless the interaction of the two forms that concerned Clausewitz who strongly emphasized the initiative of the ensuing pursuit, permitting the infliction of disproportionate losses upon the loser.

    After all, bullies often retreat strategically, and the target of bullying can only be glad for any respite that they have achieved. Indeed, misplaced and civilized equanimity may be manipulatively exploited to render any however more vengeful options actually distasteful to the good natured, peace loving and harried target of bullying, especially given a bully who capably exploitatively presents a pitiable and pathetic demeanor. But with more realistic assessment, firmer resolve, better preparation, responsible initiative, and intervention if need be, greater losses, particularly social disgrace, may be inflicted upon bullies to get the upper hand and more effectively neutralize the threat and harm. For all of this is no less than how any trustworthy and bullyproofed society would respond in protection of the individual within his or her rights.

    The dynamic relationship between defense and offense is just one of a larger group of concepts which might collectively be labeled the "dynamics of war." These would include the emphases on friction and morale, the diminishing force of the offensive, the "culminating point of victory"; in short, all of the factors that prevent struggle from being a linear process, that create the unpredictable see-sawing between opposing wills and powers that characterizes real-world conflict on every level, even entirely social, and with utter indifference to whatever the stakes, great or small, well understood or scarcely fathomed.

    All of this why a more militant approach against the pervasive problems of bullying, and certainly better intelligence gathering, needs to at least be considered, for better exploitation of tactical opportunities.

    Give and take relations and functional social networks providing any sense of security in life do exist, of course. But that does not mean that everyone finds them or gains access, easily or at all. And those who are so blessed may often either take it all far too much for granted or fear losing it too much to ever stick out their necks. And so, all the time, many good people are slipping through the cracks, in one sense or in one way or another.

    And this brings us to the difficulty of connecting and organizing and, consequently, the hopes invested in the very prospect of future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry.

     

    Crypto-Totalitarianism and the crippling obsession with socialization

    Indeed, to this day, victim blaming and scapegoating often seizes upon the old pretext that the targets of bullying are socially inept and deficient. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail. And yet, hypocrisy not withstanding, let us no longer deny the truth of the bullies' superior social skills. For by definition, who can deny the abilities of an enduring predator or parasite? Indeed, the stereotypical oafish lone physical bully is the exception.

    By all means then, let us address the acquisition and improvement of social skills. Indeed, the abused frequently learn from their abusers, even to become abusers themselves, so, again, there's no use
    denying it. Or else, the abused, miserable, only learn helplessness and to keep their place. Or others become people pleasers and social climbers and to better fit in, or simply learn to conform and escape notice. But by no means is sheer heteronomy exhaustive. For others even do learn how to stand up for themselves and ever fight back. As if that where always easy or cut and dry! Or always enough.

    Some, most fortunately of all, learn to network, socially, in order to gain crucial connections, alliances, even friendship that they may reciprocally rely upon for safety. Undeniably, such do acquire and master adequately proficient social skills. But alas, not all of us, and under any different circumstances and situations, for any number of reasons, rise to these daunting challenges. And that is how the target of bullying will be different in their
    traits, and also vulnerable to harassment and to ubiquitous intolerable conniving active sabotage which is called Relational Bullying, isolation, ostracism, protractedly escalating of syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse.

    And so, the victim blaming and scapegoating seizing upon the old pretext that the targets of bullying are socially inept and deficient, is not entirely or literally untrue, just
    amoral and lacking in decent values. Instead, the hypocrisy, the unstated values assumed are the dire obligation of every individual to enthusiastically validate and uphold status quo uncritically, hence the malignant heteronomy to conformist pressures to adapt, impunity, veritable vigilante socialization to crush all misfits and dissidents and render the masses attachment disordered but socially skilled, sacrificing deeper and genuine robust and healthy autonomous social development essential to freedom in favor of conformist and heteronymous socialization, in an ongoing program inculcated via our Inductivism of what passes for education, in which bullies and thugs then actually lead the way as pillars of a criminal community standing in for the open Totalitarianism that would never be tolerated anymore. Not long suppressed, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility.

    Barriers to adequate social survival skills and strategies are varied, may indeed include all manner of personal troubles, foibles, character flaws and failings, but no less often circumstantial or situational problems of practical insurmountably, also profound dramatic conflict with real values. Hence the frequent sheer and tragic
    irrelevancy of pressures to adapt, impunity, veritable vigilante socialization prevalent and so unjustly legitimized by victim blaming against the targets of bullying, with the effect of better recruitment in the preservation of status quo by the eager and ubiquitous Fifth Columns of the Reactionaries even within ostensibly or nominally open and democratic society, wherein more straightforward and pervasive blatantly dictatorial brutality will be unacceptable but tactics of, for all intents and purposes, injurious participatory mass brainwash are normal, even banal. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the problem in the first place with such utter impunity. Of course serial bullies will typically only resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed, romantically or otherwise, than when they only fail.

    And so, if however prevailing social expectations are rejected as inadequate and illegitimate, oppressive, unjust, what options then remain? The answer is, change, even revolution. And so, unless one is entirely satisfied with the petty pace of progress, then the questions remain, what can be done to help, and yes, what can be done differently and better for and, yes, by the targets of bullying?

    No, indeed, the pursuit of happiness need never be construed as any guarantee of success nor any right nor effete entitlement thereto. Yet remain open any range of questions of responsibility and the limitations thereof. Because, supposing, as some hold true, that we are each and all entirely responsible for everything in our lives that happens to us, then we are also obligated to consider any measures of possible effective response. Or else, if we are not responsible for every our own fortune or misfortune, then why ought we simply to bear the latter stoically?

    Otherwise, any positive right, such as the right to walk out at night in safety, remains entirely corollary to a clear negative right, such as the right not to get mugged. Likewise, even the broadest pursuit of happiness will be contingent upon the maintenance of the proverbial level playing field, in specific, protection from the self serving unfair advantage of physical and protractedly escalating of syndrom
    es of shunning and mobbing, emotional abuse or the social injury of malicious disenfranchisement. Hence, when all else clearly, chronically and systemically fails, the audacious, unapologetic and ongoing primary aim of Clique Busters must be to defuse, undermine and disrupt bullying of any kind, even covertly and by the non violence of moral suasion coupled with low guile. Clique Busters is a somewhat Machiavellian Realistic conspiracy proposal for active outreach towards the covert engineering of Civility by Guerrilla Transactional Analysis re-scripting bullying mimesis

     

    More alternatives to CliqueBusters TM?

    Short of complete and utter moral paralysis, Beating the Bully is a short and sensible article about dealing with bullying.

    The context is that of grade school, but one may consider what part of it may or may not adapt to any other social context. But one must also consider when any strategy might fail or become self defeating.

    For examples, in less formal circumstances where responsible authority is not clear or ill equipped, in situations of  scapegoating and victim blaming, false accusation of whatever sort, or collusion with bullies one way or another, when organized gang stalking bullies actually make themselves nigh impossible to avoid, even insinuating and entrancing themselves into whatever the community base, particularly during social events where there is a grave Catch-22 dilemma in that retreat, momentary or permanent, obviates participation and only yields to the bullies' aim of exclusion of the target of bullying. Or when whatever legal recourse fails or becomes endlessly protracted. Nor is retreat even always feasible when there is an obligation to attend, as in the workplace or the classroom.

    Indeed, the article does not even really deal with covert relational hostility. nevertheless, Beating the Bully remains good practical advice in some situations, and from which to make a beginning.

    Likewise, though focusing in the workplace, kickbully.com  where your fight begins

     
    Repeated and continual reference will made in this web document to future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry.

     

    Click the hyperlinked term at any time, for further information. 

    Of course, hypocritical bullies too, also can and do take a prosecutorial tone. Alas, guilt tripping, after all, is no more exclusive to truth and justice than indignation is reserved for the blameless. Because there are always manipulative scoundrels getting away with fraudulently seizing the moral high ground.

    Thus, the potential for abuse in any sort of response what so ever is demonstrated. And some are sharply profoundly paralyzed by this realization. After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. But the freedom of any moral choices can only be responsibly evaluated in comparison to the practical alternatives. Unassertive inaction by apathetic bystanding, dishonest silence and social loafing, these are sins of omission, however rationalized by whatever craven and self serving blanket demonization on principle of any resistance or opposition what so ever.

    nevertheless, perhaps one fine day, future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry alone will suffice for ending bullying completely and forever, entirely non confrontationally. Hey, anyone squeamish about Clique Busters has gotta love highly advanced automated Sociometry. But there are foreseeable problems, even with future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry . And, therefore, if it is ever needed, something like Clique Busters might well arise on it's own. Because future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry , if it works at all, would inevitably help coordinate global bully resistance already coming together, and even network together people who would evolve into Clique Busters by sheer complementary inclination. Unless, of course, the need for any of that indeed simply begins to disappear come the advent pf future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry , as visionary computer programmer Douglas Wilson is convinced it must. nevertheless, we may only be prudent to cover all bases simply to err on the side of caution.

    For, indeed, just as the Civil Rights Movement was answered with murderous Racial violence, and just as Gay Liberation has elicited Gay Bashing, indeed, future interaction on the frontiers of advanced automated network Sociometry, not despite but because of all the great good it could do, may be answered with a Reactionary backlash well before the entire world can ever be Utopian transformed.

    In one case in the news, a heterosexual male was severely injured in a beating by an assailant who simply thought the man was Gay, just because he was seen hugging a close friend before taking leave of the restaurant where they had gone with others for dinner. Worse, police response was decidedly half hearted. Gay Bashing is on the rise because open Homosexuality has triggered certain unstable and extreme Homophobes, who otherwise might tend to stay underground, but who continue to be supported underground, not unlike abortion clinic arsonists and other terrorists thugs. And the slippery and covert cronyism of cliquish bullies is not dissimilar.

    .com  

    Likewise, the tendency of covert relational hostility and harassment, in any context, and on any scale, from the petty to the severe, to escalate when the target of bullying tries to do anything about it, or things begin to improve, is well established. Because such petty cliques are protective of their vested interests and power, and such bullies already readily excitable to jealous rage by both the vulnerability and even the envied positive traits of what ever sort of personalities the bullies look for and tend to target as victims.

    Thus, it is plain fool hardy not to have an interim back-up plan like Clique Busters. Just in case even future interaction on the frontiers of advanced automated network Sociometry does not reform bullies just a step faster than it helps their targets or otherwise begins to improve and open up society in ways that, leave us face it, would rather tend to upset cliquish bullies to actout devious covert relational hostility and Social Network Optimization are directly opposite and antithetical. Period. 

    Besides, until hoped for future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry , we must make do with other feasible options.

    And even from future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry , social conflict, "culture wars" of some kind, are eminently likely. And head-in-the-sand Moralistic see/hear/speak no evil Pollyannas are merely irresponsible enablers for bullies. And it must be hoped, someday, and sooner better than later, that the positive influence of advanced automated Sociometry will help them all to grow back-bones, instead. 

    Indications are that bullies may already be coming out against highly advanced automated Sociometry . And it hardly pays to quail at the prospect of offending those who are already most opposed to an idea already. Moreover, response suggests that Clique Busters may even help raise interest in future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry . Thus, it may be hoped that the Clique Busters concept may prove more of an actual asset than any sort of embarrassing public relations liability, after all. 

    Be that as it may, the correct identification of bullies and victims is key, of course. Hierarchies of bullies, and conflicts among bullies, may complicate the picture. That is why effective Intelligence gathering and development are crucial. local area social network mapping functionality will also be useful in intelligence analysis as entailed in projections of future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry .

    Also, individuals who are really only angry mainly because they might be pining for acceptance by bullying cliques, are quite a different matter than targets of bullies, known or unknown to the targets of bullying, wronged, injured and righteously disgusted, who only want to be free of bullying and want nothing whatsoever to do with bullies, no matter how popular and well connected, even at the significant sacrifice of important networking opportunities. And
    covert relational hostility goes far beyond any bounds of the right of refusal by anyone, however snooty, to associate with anyone else in particular, individually, or even to dislike them, privately.

    The crucial difference is that devious and divisive
    covert relational hostility contrives and connives to isolate the target from third parties entirely, even to ostracize the target completely. To actually search and destroy all of the target's existing social connections and block every opportunity for the target to make new ones. And that's distinctly another matter, isn't it? A conduct so vile, that it's sheer unbelievability is exploited by bullies to vilify and discredit not only the target of bullying, but the very idea that such things do, indeed, happen at all. And these are all important counterpropaganda points against the lies and rationalizations of abusive bullies. Given these realities of human nature, are we all even Paranoid enough? Or indeed, do we all tend to a Pollyanna underestimation of a gravely destructive and pervasive evil....

     

    The threat to social progress

    Won't future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry  to vastly improve interpersonal networking for each individual, for whatever kind of contacts or relationships, be bound to upset a lot of bullies? Indeed, there are indications that the very idea already does. nevertheless, visionary computer programmer Douglas Wilson eternally hopes otherwise, because future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry  Sociometry will likely reshape a more stable and tolerant society, and even imbed the bullies, or former bullies, into close knit social networks, thus helping the insecure and maladapted, who need it most, so that they will be happy, benefit from positive influences, loose interest in bad influences, and give up their destructive behaviors.

    And that all this will entirely go off as smooth as silk, without a hitch, and with nary a ruffled feather! Or so, we can only hope. Because future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry y, and it's revolution, will be both so insidious and so ubiquitous. Non confrontational and morally undemanding. So much the better, then, if Clique Busters proves nothing but needless Paranoia. In that case, the question remains whether such Paranoia simply errs on the side of caution, or only exacerbates danger somehow, nuch as the timid and conflict averse so vaguely dread. After all, just because the latter position reeks of sheer victim blaming and scapegoating, signifies neither
    logically nor Ontologically.

     

    Why is Clique Busters actually taboo?

    “Our disputants put me in mind of the cuttlefish that, when he is unable to extricate himself, blackens the water about him till he becomes invisible.”
     
    —  Joseph Addison


    “Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation, are people who want crops without ploughing the ground; they want rain without thunder and lightning; they want the ocean without the roar of its many waters. The struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, or it may be both. But it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”

    —  Frederick Douglass
     
    Even among those who actually relate so passionately to the problem and the experience, none will explain to me their squeamishness even to acknowledge the actual Clique Busters proposal. Indeed, they will more readily discuss bringing back the old woodshed and paddle or even just going Columbine postal! And so I am left only to ponder why is CliqueBusters actually so utterly taboo? Why is any moral or practical question whatsoever, of independently organizing towards effective outside intervention against bullying, all so entirely taboo, let alone any particular suggestion as to what form, strategy or implementation any of that might take? 
     
    “I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones.”  John Cage
     
    Machiavelli confounds with hard realism, all the ideal false argument by analogy of classical philosophy in sociology and politics. nevertheless, arguing as he was wont with the original Cynics, Socrates rebuts amoral expediency, the Real Politick of his day, with one salient point. For, even as Machiavelli later urged his Prince that it is better, safer, more effective to be feared than to be loved, but with the crucial provision that it is important to be feared without coming to be hated, likewise Socrates had already cautioned his fellow Athenians that for any effective deterrence, even those who fear to offend against you must also trust you all the more not to seize the very next advantage as may arise and aggress against them nevertheless regardless of whether or not in any way provoked. Otherwise, they will only be obliged likewise, to first strike at the earliest opportunity. Thus, Real Politick remains both self fulfilling and reciprocal. In other words: no justice, no trust, no peace. Indeed, otherwise, even the very opposite of conflict need not be peace, but rather, and all to often, oppression.
    Worse, every time the oppressed begin finding the temerity to rise up demanding freedom, there are always the masses, however effusively sympathetic, of those nevertheless all the more urging remaining silent because now is simply not the time. But then, when is it ever? The inertia of bystanding is often the result of becoming too busy and exhausted in pursuit of whatever needs and priorities of the moment, hopeful that any more extreme response will become unnecessary anyhow, afraid of the risks, mistakes, ridicule, ostracism, injury of whatever sort, liability or worse, pessimistic of effectiveness and real sustained results, denial, satisfice, heteronymously excessive dependence upon existing systems and status quo. Alas there are always too many that prefer even oppression to conflict, no matter how that pains and shames them. And hence the logical consistency and best intentions even in actingout their most reprehensible compulsions of cowardice. Such are the touchy-feely Hobbesian toadies, no matter their bleeding hearted manipulation, soothing bribes of sympathy and paralytic guilt tripping, manipulatively shaming the underdog even deeper into the passive helplessness of inner conflict and despair. Stockholm Syndrome is indeed insidious and even infectious. For to paraphrase Carl von Clausewitz, the aggressor is always peace loving, because they will always prefer to aggress and to bully unopposed.
     
    After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. By contrast, never pretending to transcend all strife but merely striving to control and lower the stakes, the Passivism on the lofty path of Mahatma Gandhi and Martin Luther King is, quite frankly, and like it or not, founded upon an application of emotional violence, protest raising conscience, not to make a fine point of it, shaming frequently targeted against whatever oppressors in appeal to and in the sight of the world bystanding. But names have been seldom named unless of powerful public figures assuming however broad social responsibilities, and thereby, in any substantiated democratic sensibility or spirit, question begging of any ensuing criticism and controversy.

    However, beyond unchecked authority and the repression of one very large group by another, or by public officials and prominent individuals, abuse of power takes many other forms, and at every level and scope. So, what of similar moral suasion as in the grand scope of public issues, but on the more intimate scope of day to day life?

    One major problem is that some might find the concerted effort at likewise shaming individuals or peer groups however richly deserving, of public denunciation however just and long overdue, far too personal and therefore much as bullying the bullies and sinking to their level; raising the uncomfortable and barbaric specter of putting up the accused in stocks for public humiliation or branding them for shame. Indeed, the very notion is literal taboo, nigh impossible to discuss because so many simply will not be prevailed upon even to speak of it, rather to sidestep by any means whatsoever the very question. Even though one may openly suggest bringing back the old woodshed and paddle or just going Columbine postal! And even now that it has become so much more difficult to at all credibly,
    deny the social dynamic of bullying by pretending that bullying is entirely a lone individual behavioral aberration, as prevalent only in most recent years.

    Yes, there is veritable a well spring of concern to protect the tender feelings of the bullies, from the awful rebuke of the underdog! Can you say: "victim blaming?" -I knew that you could! One way or another, Narcissistic manipulative bullies are all too often masters of misdirection in order to make themselves seem the victims, unjustly maligned, wronged, even noble and selfless in occupation of the moral high ground.

    And so, let us discourse unflinchingly upon the
    rôle of shame and shaming, and the awful power and responsibility incumbent thereupon:
    As Mark Twain put it:
        “Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to. 

    For good or ill, shaming is crucially formative in childrearing and beyond. And it is not all the same. Crucial difference include the distinction between the paralytic shock of guilt and the motility, even catharsis, of shame. Also whether shaming however inappropriately belittles the individual self worth intrinsically and even seemingly irredeemably, or whether shaming is genuine anger quite ingenuously directed against a behavior, particularly in the correction of any however destructive conduct and only in self defense. No less crucial a point is how, quite often, the more secretly amorally shameless the bully, the more conformist, sensitive and terrified of losing face, publicly. That is why bullying cannot merely be so obviously evil, but must be established as way uncool.

    Not all qualms are equal. Shame is nothing shameful in and of itself, when shame manifests in the restraint from conscience. But squeamishness and sanctimony that shies from righteousness is no conscience at all. And so, beware, always, the sins of omission. For in all the nine circles of hell, Dante rightly reserves the very hottest section of the Inferno for those who cultivate neutrality in the midst of moral
    crisis
     
    Attention can manifest as love or hate and may be directed towards doing, especially conduct or else towards mere being. Cliquish bullying is flagrant abuse of power and unfair advantage, corruptive positive stroking and all manner of rewards and advantages for the most deplorably hateful conduct to say the very least, and, generally, targeted against mere being of the howsoever vulnerable.

    Whereas, Clique Bustersis certainly predicated upon howsoever negative attention focused against such malignant conduct, in attentive positive defense of mere being. Hence, then, the equivalency and literally unspeakable danger of Clique Busters and why the concept must be suppressed from public discourse. For we must never dare admit, so the timid thinking goes, that there is any difficulty or adverse consequence in simply standing up to bullies. Better that such fragile temerity should ever fail or stifle still born, than that the effort should ever be redoubled with any greater resources and highly public support.  No, no! If waves must be made, then at all cost, keep the waves small, lapping at the cost line in patient gentle erosion, without undue alarm! Such is the imperative of timid reform.

    Because the society of the bullies is our society and all that we have. Who can
    deny it? If people where ever to be encouraged to be genuine and socialize as they please and merely as real friends, then they will never be adapted to a practical adult world of productive deferential compromise, of unflagging heteronomy. It is crucial then, to somehow with civilized maturity to rebalance and agreeably sublimate the roles of bully and target of bullying is at all possible, but, at all cost, certainly never to actually disrupt the roles of hierarchical dominance upon which the social order and our way of life endures.

    Of course, so the thinking goes, we should keep alive the cherished values of democracy in the long term of social progress, but never dare we truly exercise them in the here and now. For that simply is never practical.

    Indeed? Well, Clique Busters says different! So, safest, then, comes the timid reformers status quo response in reflex, to skirt the very notion as literal taboo, never spoken off. After all, or so the tacit reasoning goes: There are ever so many entirely productive avenues by which to politely evade the point. Catharsis and insight are of great comfort, but assertive change is frightening. Rather, let the past be past and pretend that we are progressing on a solid foundation.
     
    All sheer poppycock, of course!
     
    There are many ways of dealing with bullying, some more extreme than others, at whatever expense of personal resources, time and effort, dire choices and with varying tradeoffs and degrees of effectiveness. Any human optimum is no small achievement. Moral suasion is already the very height of civilization. But angelic perfection and certainty is an impossible and calculatingly paralytic demand. There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish only in other the fitness to thrive, remaining difficult and costly, only for anyone else, to violate, but not, to quote Joseph Conrad: a moralist, who, generally speaking, has no conscience except the one he is at pains to produce for the use of others.  Therefore, Harm Reduction practice with regard to the problems of bullying predicate the recognition that social risk is a natural and universal part of all our lives. Social interaction in and of itself is hardly pathological. There is indispensable benefit as well as social risk and harm. Many people are coping the best they know how or can attain presence of mind, thinking on their feet or functioning under overwhelming and deliberately malicious pressure. “Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation, are people who want crops without ploughing the ground; they want rain without thunder and lightning; they want the ocean without the roar of its many waters.” In the words of Frederick Douglass: "The struggle may be a moral one, or it may be a physical one, or it may be both. But it must be a struggle. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will.”
    Achievement of change in situation is often a process or "journey" attended upon by numerous stages or phases. People change and readapt at their own pace, based upon such things as readiness and motivation, safety, information, skills and beliefs, their own hierarchy of needs. A client-centered, flexible, creative and non-judgmental approach is crucial to meeting the complex needs of anyone requiring any whatever conceivable service or support, Clique Busters no less than any other approach. Policy makers, educators and health promoters can dictate to targets of bullying how and why they should prevent harm and provide them with the means and wherewithal to do it, but only the target of bullying themselves have the legitimate final say, considered judgment and common sense that ought not to be invalidated by conditioned helpless Pollyanna nonsense. Such added pressure is simply inappropriate.
     
    We are each and all entitled to whatever accurate, practical information, support and encouragement, for social groups to develop and coordinate together even the skills and stratagems of civility and orchestrated moral suasion among whatever conceivable tools and options to help reduce the harmful consequences of the situations they find themselves in, such as conditions of chronic bullying, consequences not only to themselves, but to all others and to society at large.

     

    The vindication of Clique Busters

    And so, I have undertaken the moral defense of Clique Busters on a point by point basis as we go. I also have been explaining Clique Busters, strategically, how it is intended to work, and why. And I still await cogent moral or strategic refutation, what so ever, from any of my horrified detractors. -Never mind from those who do not acknowledge the problem, impugn the motives, or even those with the sheer temerity to deny outright and categorically that group dynamics of any sort what so ever even factors into individual misbehavior at all. 

    It must be admitted how, nigh inevitably, should CliqueBusters as proposed, ever achieve implementation and gain any traction, this would make for a practical guarantee of eventual perversion thereof, one way or another and at one time or another, just the same as with virtually every other crusade for social justice that has ever been or likely ever will be. Shall we then abandon all crusade for social justice? CliqueBusters as proposed, at least seeks to remedy the vulnerabilities to abuse of previous social justice crusades, by Epistemological and Methodological  emphasis upon the time and trouble of investigation ferreting out the truth (correspondence to reality in allegations) and justice, of differing circumstances and situations, instead of sheer ideological bias and intellectually lazy self serving and hypocrisy. Is it then such proposed solution, or the problem to begin with, that renders CliqueBusters so taboo? And so, when people are nervous and refuse to explain why, then must wonder if we have at all convergent agendas. And so, it may even be a positive sign, from where I sit, that they quail so. -As little as that helps...

    Because, why ever would people of good faith hesitate to open my eyes, if I am, indeed, so misguided? What ever can be the flaw so obvious in my worldview that no one dares speak it's name? Surely not that the destruction that accrues from self serving petty malice and hypocrisy makes me angry. Not should they truly share my righteous indignation, sympathy or pain. Nor should anyone fear to act, these proposed tactics and measures all being so moderate as they are. Who are they afraid to upset? Surely not the enemy in the first place! Or maybe so, and even with good reason. But what are the alternatives? They refuse to say. 

    All in all, and unaccountably, there are those who seem more upset by Clique Busters, and far less afraid even of any prospect of yet another school yard shooting spree! Not that such, either, is really anything new. Just topical. 

    Standing up to bullies remains a test of character. And some folks just seem to measure and ration theirs out. Appeasers in the end, who compromise out of reflex, not reason or prudence. Who are timid in negotiation. Who imagine allowing some place for bullies, even as bullies, rather than excluding or improving their behavior. And let the targets of bullying pay at least some tolerable price for business as usual. As if the suffering of others can also be measured and rationed out, or that the bullies would ever be so careful and gracious, knowing their place and bound by honor. 

     

     

     

    The righteousness of sex as a subversive act
     
    “When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.”  — Matt Groening
     
    Now we come to the complicated question of counteracting bullying cliquishness in our love lives:
     
    In fear and under pressure it is easy to be wary without being prudent, confused and hesitant at any prospect for personal joy but exhausted, nervous and worn down and susceptible to blatantly manipulative exploitation, socially.

    Indeed, the elicitation of
    sexual caution on the part of many women is often only effective at obstructing and deflecting ordinary and decent men, while ineffective and actually counterproductive at fending off manipulative users and abusers. The results, then, are predictable. The advantage goes to predation of whatever kind. Worse, bad people in cliques, cult-like, often collude in prescreening all individual contacts through the peer group, in furtherance of their own agenda of exploitation and with little regard for the individual's well being or true best interests.
     
    Fortunate, then, is anyone imbedded in any genuine and sympathetic web of support and free of domineering cliques!
     
    We each have the right, of course, to have whatever congress between anyone who wants to, but only when you're good and ready, so long as whomever else remains interested. And we each also have the right, for example, even to copulate with anyone one chooses to even on the first date, if you ever might so desire, so long as they are also willing! If they wouldn't approve, then don't sleep with them! How dare they complain? And don't hold back to try to impress them, either. But run like Hell! Shun them completely! 

    Aren't there risks and consequences in life enough, without these needless intrigues and innuendo additionally? -Without
    hypocritical prudish coercion into either premeditated entrapment or controlling conditional acceptance? Can there be no bonds of true affection instead of just withholdance, rejection and emotional extortion?

    If your intuition is that you would be rejected by someone for sleeping with that person on the first date (even hypothetically), then that person is just sucker-bait! Not your judge appointed by God
    . And not a lost lamb for you to save, either. Only be true to yourself. The awkward may often benefit more from nurture than pressure, but bullies are not corrected by submissive wasted patience. 

    So stop protesting your innocence, and stand up for your rights, if you ever really want to be respected by anyone who even has the capacity for respect!

    What pleases women and what women tend to choose are not always the same. Indeed, women may at all respond positively to a man who is confident, proactive and fun. -Some would even say: A many man, even though as we shall see, such assets of autonomy are precious, scarce and wonting in women too. For alas, such are the very characteristics that will likely most incite the most hateful jealousy, bullying and cockblocking, possessive manipulation that women are all too accustomed to tolerate as entirely normal. Hence all the more the motivation of effective
    punishment and reward for men to tone down all assertive character, instead to pander to peer approval and thereby curry social integration, indeed to be unmanly and disingenuous, to become heteronymous sheeple, and to connive, avoid and conceal all conflict to which women may be so averse, back off and passively bystand or even flee. After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm.
     
    In the immortal words of Margret Mead: “Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.” But the more one caters to spineless Sexist assholes and the amoral sociopathic serial bullies that rule them, the more one not only attracts assholes and wimps, but locks out connection from anyone better. Worse, when one deals with possessive and controlling manipulative assholes, bullies, they then progressively and deviously isolate one from anyone nicer and condition one into heteronymous inability to accept acceptance at all.
     
    Whatever anyone, personally, wants from relationships, or not, or how soon, or later, one had best begin by seeking out someone more tolerant! One cannot please Moralistic prudes and Misogamists (woman haters) and man-bashers! So please don't. Just stop trying. Because, that behavior supports and rewards bullying, and thereby makes life difficult for the rest of us trying to get by at all and to offer better in the world.
     
    For sad and pathetic approval seekers so deeply conditioned to equate jealousy with authority, everything happy or confident is forbidden, because anything good in life will always incite actingout of jealous rage in one form or another by somebody or other. Therefore, anything worth doing with anyone worthwhile may very likely also tend to ruffle the feathers of those who jealously resent that person. Therefore such is all that prior approval seeking seeks to illicit: discouragement in reaching out, and the encouragement to chicken out, which in their insecurity, all that they really seek. In the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” Indeed, a subversive collusion, if any good, according to George Orwell, and with the courage of autonomy.
     
    Ordinary acceptance is the initial foundation of healthy relationships, not the pinnacle of dysfunctional relationship building with the attachment disordered. If you don't start from tolerance then you simply won't arrive at acceptance. Nor will you ever achieve anything deeper or loftier. Third party permission may not be forthcoming. Generally, the door is either open or it is not.

    And to those women who insist that there are no Heterosexual honest intelligent attractive men who are not so interminably ambivalen
    t intolerant and abusive, well then, here I am! We do exist. So don't be intimidated or diverited. So long as there is any mutual attraction of any kind, then all you really need to do is hold up your end of the conversation. As they sometimes say in the personals advertisements, I seek  nothing less than "partners in crime" (as it where) for "whatever works."
     
    “If you don't risk anything, you risk even more.”  — Erica Jong
     
     
     
    Covert relational hostility, divisive intimidation and Sexism
           The foxes are guarding the chicken coop, and always have been.

    .com  

    There are always those picayune zealots who rail against the objectification of women as inherent in Media and Advertising, just as they continue to do against cartoon violence and spirited Rock & Roll. But all of that is still nothing more than prudish pseudo-psychiatric magical Victorian thinking, that if we don't talk about it, if expression will only be excised from popular culture, sex and all of the strife that comes with it will just go away. But sexual and emotional exploitation, unexamined, is a day to day occurrence accepted and adapted to as part of business as usual. That is why real attitudes and practices ought to bear such scrutiny as is wasted upon witlessly oppressive culture wars.

    Truth in jest: As the old joke goes, three women from different countries discuss how each of them would cope, hypothetically, as the only woman stranded on a desert isle with a group of healthy and robust men. "I find a fortifiable safe location" answers the English woman. "I'd make an alliance with the strongest man to fend off the others" replies the American woman. "I don't understand" responds the French Woman, quite mystified. "What is the problem?

    Answer: "The popular clique or cool group, whose members have the most friends, socialize earlier than others inside and outside of school, and appear to be having all the fun." But the truth may be uglier than cultivated appearance.

    In Jonathan Swift's 'Gulliver's Travels', Gulliver, upon his return to what we call civilization, describes life among the Yahoos. How the leader of the Yahoos is selected as  the worst person among them, and how he then recruits the next worse among the Yahoos as his lieutenants to help him herd together all the desirable Yahoo women for themselves and violently monopolize all other resources as well. 

    And Gulliver is perplexed at giving offence in giving his account of the ways of the Yahoos, blithely unaware how close it cuts to home! Nor can anyone explain it's offensiveness without exposing their own self-serving Moralistic hypocrisy as chronic cockblockers! What Gulliver describes, of course, is the amoral behavior of herd animals. And like the herd animals they have been reduced to under the oppression of the disdainfully refined Houyhnhms, the Yahoos trouble themselves with little hypocritical pretence of Moralistim even in all of their most flagrant self serving. -Unlike the affluent and powerful amid that which we call civilization

    For to quote Mark Twain, "Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to." 

    "In general, most men fail to meet women [because] they travel in packs but go on the hunt solo" or, to employ the Naturalists jargon, they function, and badly, as "sneaky rutters", according to 'CubanJoe's Rules of Engagement', apparently a more condensed version of 'The Pickup Mission'. Indeed, social "proof" not unlike the first shills rising to their feet from the audience of a faith healer to help get the proverbial ball metaphorically rolling, rent-a-friends, wingmen and yes: wingwomen, are all available for hire, in order to provide social Persecutor-Rescuer and to make introductions: "making you look attractive fun mysterious interesting and scarce (just what Women look for in a real man)."

    But if the notion of a human pack seems already quite unsavory and disturbing, then, as Jonathan Swift reveals to us, the human herd is by far even the worse!

    Bullies appeal to the lowest common denominator. Bullies are malevolent confidence tricksters often abusing trust of affinity and exploiting the greed for easy acceptance along with the urgency of misplaced compassion and sex appeal, to bypass Critical Thinking and conscience. 

    There really is no term for a sexually active or sexually open woman that is not derogatory. Use value, physical, emotional, help, assistance and comfort in life, every good thing, all of it, is at best taken for granted and actually vilified as to lower exchange value! Obviously, this peculiar exchange rate was never set by lonely guys. You know, the nice ones, who are always finishing last, as the saying goes. nevertheless, it remains the truth, that virgins are boring! Thus it must be hoped that tolerance is not, in truth, the exclusive hall mark of the utter luzer and undesirable. For yet does it escape me what can be so tantalizing about domineering sexist prudery, judgment and abuse. 

    Disinhibiting chemicals, their social dependency and "Downright upright" TV commercials not withstanding, there simply is no way for a woman to be both respectable and free and exciting at the same time. Much as, now a days, many do try. Except by getting off the fence and asserting herself and the dignity of sex for pleasure

    A woman only exposes herself to risk of judgment and the wretched abuse that is slut shaming by depending upon Yahoos, cliques of bullies for social connection. And needlessly so. Because, when bullies slander a woman who remains in demand, no less when they seek to poses one who mocks them, all the more, the bullies will only seem foolish and impotent. They know this, and can only fret amongst themselves, if their bluff is thus called. 

    Not unless they are actually ready to resort to forceful coercion and even violence and enjoy the impunity for doing so. And such finally rises to redress by criminal complaint.

    Stress Maladaptation in sexrole

    Tension may arise from mystery, the unknown, events unfolding or outcome in any way in doubt. Tension is stress, and the innate or conditioned emotional, neurochemical and physiological preparative change or stress response to challenge, stimuli or stressors may be either distress and dread as to threat and emergency or eustress, the euphoric stress of pleasant anticipation, the demands of pleasant activities, power and opportunity.

    Even humor depends upon tension from an insecurity brought to a resolution called the punch line, that may be either surprising or else even obvious and anticipated, just so long as the tension builds and then crests. Teasing, well intended or otherwise, also cultivates and builds stress. So does flirtation, but likewise manipulation, rejection or indifference and harassment or threat.

    The Stress Vulnerability Model of Psychiatric Disorders is flawed only in that for these purposes, what is called biological vulnerability is actually universal in the condition of the human species. And so, the determinant is nurture, not nature. Fraudulent obfuscation to the contrary are only the current preferred high powered junk science marketing tactic of the Psychopharmacolical industry, pandering to compassion burn out and desperation, mocking and trivializing such cherished illusions as the yearning for understanding and with them all Philosophically/dramatically meaningful values arising from the deep wellsprings of human emotional needs.

    The will to power may be benign, benevolent, malevolent or absent and ineffectual, as per culturally acquired behavioral patterns and the content of individual character. As a matter of sexroles, it is said that, one way or another, while the pleasure principle of will to power (even if not in whatever abusive hostile sense of dominance, but only in any entirely benign and even constructive sense of opportunity) arouses men, it is mystery that keeps women involved, for better or worse, the worst being to simply and blithely actout response to ambient or stealth abuse triggers of pernicious ambivalent conflicting mixed signals, even to the tragic point of veritable Masochism, even the eroticization of learned helplessness and poisonous Cinderella myths. Indeed, various destructive cliques, particularly Obscurantist cults and scams, draw in the mark in vein hope that things will begin to make more sense as the mystery unfolds. Alas, happy endings are never guaranteed in the face of passivity and love conquers nothing without backbone, the courage for growth.

    Women are all too often encouraged to take men and sexual opportunity for granted, and, no less prudishly intolerant than men, even to fear, revile and despise what comes to them too eager and easily, to dread the forbidden fruit and wait patiently and even in some sort of erotic suspense for approval or permission that will never be forthcoming.

    And, for the most part, men are either genuine and therefore easy or else just manipulative. And this is uncomplicated. The drama of real complexity and depth of character arises from empathy, regret and analytic disposition, and not just any level of common inner turmoil and conflict whatsoever. Alas, the vulgar preference for predictable melodrama, in both art and a life, the mimesis of senseless headgames and Stockholm Syndrome full of tribulation that come only to one's own disadvantage. And this is more corruption in the Nietzschean sense, against which the struggle of true Feminist empowerment, no less than the Causeless Compassion of a mythic Wonder Woman, must fiercely contend.

     

    The Ontology and Situational Forces of Stockholm Syndrome doublethink

    “Put more trust in nobility of character than in an oath.”  Solon

    Almost all absurdity of conduct arises from the imitation of those who we cannot resemble.”  — Samuel Johnson

    The three motivating principle cofactors in effective manipulation and disorienting ambient or stealth abuse are whatever the incentive and disincentive vulnerabilities of the target(s), the tactics of the manipulator(s), and time for the relationship to develop under whatever situation, free or captive. There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you.

    The common motivation
    s for manipulation are sheer Sadistic cruelty and/or the insecure and even desperate habitual abuse of power and control over others in blithe and frantic self-deceit to shield, bolster and/or maintain a grandiose or inflated self-image often scared by victimization and manipulation in the past. -Recovery from which constituting the extremely rare motivation and dim hope for any such manipulator for the crushing and painful introspection and self-knowledge gained, ever to grow and change. Events obviously and manifestly even unlikelier to be facilitated or brought about by anyone themselves still desperate and toyed under the manipulator's thumb. -Except in fairytales, of course.

    Stockholm syndrome is the name for the bond of attraction that sometimes develops between abuser and abused, molester and molested, captor and captive, and in particular between terrorist and hostage. The term derives from the recent case of a woman held hostage at a bank in Stockholm, Sweden, who actually became so pairbondedly attached to one of the bank robbers that she broke off her engagement to her previous lover in order to remain faithful to her former captor during his prison term.

    The Stress Vulnerability Model of Psychiatric Disorders is flawed only in that what is called biological vulnerability is actually universal in the human species. And so, the determinant is nurture, not nature. Fraudulent obfuscation to the contrary are only the current preferred high powered junk science marketing tactic of the Psychopharmacolical industry, pandering to compassion burn out and desperation, mocking and trivializing such cherished illusions as the yearning for understanding and with them all Philosophically meaningful values arising from the deep wellsprings of human emotional needs.

    The phenomenon of manipulation is best defined as undue advantage from trickery via the exploitation of affective innate and conditioned triggers or "push buttons" to undermine and overwhelm, even barrage, resistance, caution, better judgment and autonomy of the target, via insidiously motivating subtext and ambient or stealth abuse of emotional positive incentive and negative disincentive. –As distinct from open coercion alone or substantive disinformation, lies. Typically, the manipulator obfuscates the nature of their coercion exercised, along with whatever self-serving advantage thereof, whatever their own ultimate motivation.

    Positive incentive manipulation is such as deviously appeals to value in fantasy and desire, love, sex or greed, promoting false hope of whatever gain, in order to circumvent or overwhelm resistance, caution, better judgment and autonomy of the target. Whereas an example of negative disincentive manipulation, such insult as condescension that after all comes of love can be less painful than insult that comes without it, or more so, or equally so, as the case may be: but be that as it may, it is, in any case significantly more harmful. This is because insult provokes anger and hostility, but hostility towards people who even sincerely profess to love you and act on your own best interest is curbed and turned inwards, internalized, and experienced on the level of the inner conflict of self-hostility, namely guilt. Such deceptive appeals undermining the target’s credulity and defenses even whilst actually exercising coercion constitute often likewise internalized flagrantly manipulative behavior, conscious or unconscious, selfish, indifferent or just desperate.

    And under conditions of captivity, anger may illicit reprisal of one kind or another, giving cause for fear and the yearning for any hope as might present itself.

    For the menace of the captor represents but also deflects a palpable threat of harm to the captive. And this makes for an inherently dramatic and perversely absorbing good news / bad news situation for anyone who ever feels trapped. Bad news in the danger, good news in that it may be appeased, averited, especially, if redirected and then validated. And most salient to Stockholm Syndrome, overwhelming gratitude even for the barest most fleeting respite.

    In whatever degree, and in it's immediate and long term effects, Stockholm Syndrome perhaps more accurately described as Slave Loyalty Syndrome or mentality, obviously applies to what amounts to effective captivity even in family life, and certainly to bored and stressed students and workers. Always, it's all for your own good, dear! Enhance your calm, citizen...

    Frightened appeasement as a knee-jerk response must then be rationalized, even unto kinky fairytale false hope, if only in order to preserve self esteem. And, subsequently, social climbing in the face of conditionality amounts to the desperate attempt to negotiate the recovery of any shred of the dignity that thus has been stripped away by sly intimidation along with autonomy, and all without resistance.

    The salient point omitted from direct assertion, even though actually fairly well explained in the otherwise most informative summary of 'Loving to Survive' is how Stockholm Syndrome, in any context or degree, is not merely situationally adaptive, but can all to often condition in the long term maladaptively and entrenched, even to the point of learned helplessness of Battered Woman's Syndrome, of conflict aversion and pathetically profound cowardice all clinging even to utterly kinky fairytale false hope beyond reason and even the most lucid conscious understanding. And also, what is not really confronted, evidently for fear of stigmatizing victims as defectively masochistic, is that resultantly attachment disordered sufferers of Stockholm Syndrome, in whatever context or degree, come to actually prefer abusers and manipulation to vulnerability. Indeed, yes, among other manifestations and examples, case in point, women so frequently do seem to prefer the biggest jerks and assholes! Though to be fair, many men, likewise, may be drawn to unattainable narcissistic women. Certainly, too many of us have lost confidence, pursue that which is withheld from us, and fail to reach out to opportunity or fight back in adversity.

    Indeed,
    'Loving to Survive' points out how, in classic Freudian identification with the abuser, the captive may bring themselves to see the world and themselves from the captor's perspective even to the point of seeing outside intervention, even the authorities, the police trying to win the captives release as "bad guys" and sees captor as "good guy" and protector. But what also bears mention is how, likewise, real relationship prospects, easygoing men, nice guys, sexually open and emotionally approachable, especially the romantic competitors and scapegoats of bullies and abusers individually or in cliques, can be all too easily demonized and relationally bullied, defamed and ostracized in society by abusive and exploitative cliques, unless the fair damsel in distress "protected" ever dare even think of asserting themselves speak, choose and account for themselves responsibly and ever extricate herself from the honor protection racket.

    Indeed, in bears passing mention, also, how, as the German Feminists seem fond of pointing out, even after men, as cynical proverbed, easily enough controlled by means of the wonder bra, or otherwise or for whatever reason, have pretty much lost interest in persecuting women, women still energetically persecute one another. Such may be the classic "ugly stepsister" competitiveness among women under the enduring values of patriarchy, even long outliving initial historical cause or
    relevance.

     

    Bullied into frigidity:
    The Strategic Folly of Feminine Submission 
    “The surest protection against temptation is cowardice.”  — Mark Twain
     

    Abstract: Are sexually permissive individuals more victimized and socially isolated?

    Sexually permissive individuals are judged harshly by others, yet little research has examined whether these individuals themselves feel more victimized and socially isolated. Among 810 undergraduates (74% females; 38% non‐White; ages 18–23), linear, logistic, and negative binomial regressions indicated that, after controlling for demographics, higher numbers of lifetime casual sex partners predicted (a) more relational aggression experiences and sexual behavior‐based prejudice, but (b) less loneliness, greater likelihood of having a best friend, and higher numbers of close friends, acquaintances, and relatives. Controlling for extraversion rendered most isolation, but not victimization, links nonsignificant. There were few sex differences. Results suggest a complex relation between permissiveness, victimization, and isolation, indicating resiliency among permissive individuals in the face of adversity.

    Bullying presses for uniformity. Anything that stands out one way or another, better or worse than average or entirely indifferent, tend to attract bullying. A study has concluded that pretty girls are more likely to be bullied, the more so given provocative dress, young and fit. Indeed, most women being fairly cautious and well socialized, indoctrinated, conditioned and intimidated by bullying and peer pressure against sexual aggression, are more likely to make do with men howsoever at all already well within their social orbits than to assert themselves and go out of their way seeking happiness much as gold diggers hunt down wealthy prospects. That is why the thinly veiled and self serving control of social access is so effective in the overall misdirection and sublimation of sexuality promoting such wide scale misery. Indeed, successful gold diggers advertising as consultants, actually claim as a happy byproduct, better relationships and not just wealth, precisely from mercenary decisiveness and utter vulgar transparency. Perhaps in love as in politics, even competent cynicism is better than moralistic headgames.

    Accepting constraining values of sexual modesty and propriety (overwhelmingly powerful triggers of the deepest and most intensely personal embarrassment and shame) and even the most plainly arbitrary and unfair self serving judgmental rejection of ones peers is a prime example of the Stockholm Syndrome perversely maladaptive and codependent immediate and long term effect of overwhelming gratitude even for the barest most fleeting respite and eager willingness to see things from whatever the captor, abuser or bullies' point of view. Likewise shunning and failing to reach out to more accepting and easygoing people instead, particularly the romantic competition such as demonized by possessive controlling cliques of bullies, likewise fits with ambient or stealth abuse and the Stockholm Syndrome perversely maladaptive and codependent immediate and long term effect of frightened rationalized actual loyalty to abuse, eager gratitude even for the barest and most fleeting respite and determination too see things from the abusers Point Of View. Indeed, just such perversely maladaptive codependent effects of Stockholm Syndrome often tend take over the subjects' social life almost entirely, rendering autonomous responsibility for normal, supportive and reciprocal relations with decent people difficult to impossible. Indeed, for the conflict averse who equate jealousy actingout with authority, everything happy or confident is quickly forbidden, pandering to codependent decidophobia.  

    Sun Tzu said that there is no loss worse than that of the initiative relinquished. And no illusion more perilous than any such folly. For Sun Tzu, the enemy is not to be placated and strengthened, but intimidated and steered in the direction of one's own choosing. Initiative is the power to create threats.

    The side with the initiative is usually also attacking. Against a threatening enemy, one has not only has the right, but the obligation to attack upon any sign of weakness or opening. If one can create threats the enemy is weakened. This should be self-evident and expected of the enemy. Yet many tend towards contempt of weakness and assume that one must have made some mistake to be put in any position of weakness.

    The side with the initiative controls the course of events. But keeping the initiative even when over matched requires creativity, whereas the opponent only has to react to threats. In most everyone's experience, attacking is easier than defending, and, what is more, errors in defending tend to be more fatal, typically leading to defeats or great loss of resources. While errors in attacking usually only lose the initiative -- which, or course, in the long term may lead to defeat.

    The defender has less alternatives in choosing a plan. One might think that that job would therefore be easier, but choosing the right plan may be much more difficult for the defender. There is often only one way to endure, whereas there may be several ways for the attacker to win. Many brilliant attacks have proven better defendable from hindsight, because the defender could have gained the advantage with some imaginative response. In theory, every attack is over-optimistic; in practice, attacks are most likely to decide the outcome. Being proactive means being willing to win, which may be enough in many situations.

    As will be demonstrated in the sections of this text to follow, the threats and attacks of prudish cocksure Sexist bullies seeking to control women by tacit threat of slut shaming, are prone to exactly such errors of complacency and underestimation that can cost them the initiative if only quickly and competently exploited against them in imaginative counter attack most likely to decide the outcome in resounding victory against them.

    Bullies deserve no reverence, for they are pathetic. And, here in the chivalrous West, Sexist bullies may often depend entirely upon whatever explicit or tacit prudish validation they can extract from women who by meekly playing it safe not to anger the slut shaming bullies, by such timid cognitive dissonance so gratefully buying into the Persecutor-Rescuer headgame of the Honor-Protection Racket, and blithely caving into the implicit threat, thus enable the craven impunity of exactly such domineering sexist bullies. So much so, that the bullies may be profoundly stymied, publically humiliated and vulnerably exposed when, instead, all this is withheld them, and they don't get their way. And, as will be seen, just such tactical "Judo" of Transactional Antithesis offers the best initiative to be seized and turned back against them.

    But, indeed, should a woman submit to be deemed virtuous, made vapid chattel, dull and meek, then some of her suitors must be vilified by other of her suitors. Woman, passive, property, is the object of contention. Thus, traditionally, by slut shaming, Straight people persecute one another quite vigorously, unlike sexual "deviants" instead achieving socially protected minority status by ongoing proactive strategies of activism.

    Indeed, us "normal" folks also need to remember that eternal vigilance is the price of liberty. 

     

    Some more advice for women about men and society, in order not to be bullied  

    Some people generally and women especially, become hard to get simply because they are aware that they are in demand socially, enjoy every advantage of competition, and have so many options and too much on their proverbial plates. Others, ambivalent procrastinators, just lie to themselves to the effect that they are keeping their options open by such sheer indecision and timid inaction.

    Indeed, some people generally, and this is often the expectation of women in particular, value and rely upon close relations and connections not only for safety but also for resources from functional and secure embedment in society at large, while others are quite simply terrified of strangers. The latter tend to be deluded as to the nature of intimacy as well as influence, isolating themselves within an insular social setting and surrendering initiative, not only ceasing to compete meaningfully, but cutting themselves off from the benefit of competition among others.

    Women in such social circles can only have contact with men who insinuate themselves into such social circles in order to acquire contacts instead of simply approaching desired contacts directly and then networking from there according to one's own inclinations and motivated goals however put forth. Rather, the commonly recommended technique, even taught in courses for social success, is of behaving to appear "mellow" and innocuous like TV's Mr. Rogers, positive and never negative, in order to inculcate false sense of security, rather than taking social risk of being genuine, interesting or stimulating, showing the best one has to offer and honestly having a good time at play (defined as any uplifting interaction enjoyed for it's own sake) without the unremitting sycophancy of forcing or faking it in recreation (defined as the Existentially Absurd, Ecclesiastically futile and meaningless alienated desperate struggle to recuperate from the mounting stresses of work, school or family life, at one's own expense and on one's own time). All thus to allay Xenophobic unreasoning fear and avoid jealous rage rather than to entice or to reach out. To be circumspect, unnoticed and to slither in under the radar, furtively, without shedding any ray of hope.

    This is all utterly phony and even unmanly. And woe unto women too bullied and insecure for anything better! In the immortal words of Margret Mead: “Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.”  At best nice intelligent people are repressed in order to fit in. But, far worse, the most abusive and exploitative people excel and advance to even to leadership, "popularity" even when actually detested, in this common and accepted chicanery of social hypocrisy.

    An alienated and alienating process, a major turn-off arousing only to the deeply facile. Social hypocrisy stripped of it's former subtlety, nuance and the charm of desperation which remained somehow genuine. Mellow?? Better dead than mellow!!

    Even worse, peer approval and status may require calculating exploitation and then casting aside of others as "stepping stones" in the crucial process of social climbing to a more desired mate! Indeed, that much is also common advice. Ultimately, dominance and preeminence among men is achieved by collusion to monopolize women.

    However, to make matters worse, just as the German Feminists are fond of pointing out, even long after men have lost interest in dominating women, it is women, in competitive Patriarchic slave mentality, clinging to and jockeying for social position, that are most abusive, judgmental and controlling of other women.

    Clearly what women respond to need not be at all the same thing as what women say they want even when women are completely candid. How sad, how frightening, when good men, in lonely desperation, seek bad men as social mentors, resigned that women will not respond otherwise, when women have gone insane, become corrupt in the Nietzschean sense. For "I call an animal, a species, or an individual corrupt when it loses its instincts, when it chooses, when it prefers, what is disadvantageous for it." Such is the socially normative attachment disordered alienation from the self resulting from twisted and contorted effort at coming to terms with society. Masochistic timid ersatz mediocre Conformism, passing by whatever is of individual rare and unique value, difference at all upon which true intimacy is predicated.

    The problem is that no one can function at all without responses of both trust and mistrust. But when one is kept under constant pressure and suspense, self-confidence is shattered and judgment suffers as a result. Hence one is not only too paralyzed from stress for much initiative of one's own, but both too easily prone to unwanted hypersensitivity and suspicion, even of friendly overtures, unready to accept as true what remains uncertain, and, on the other hand, as well, too easily pressed to overlook undefined uneasy feelings warning of exploitation, rather than challenge a lie, no matter how hostile, unless there is the most blatant smoking gun, which would only only make for the more crushing a revelation anyhow.

    Most honestly, this may manifest as a simple experience of distress and confusion, if  not compounded with dishonest denial and rationalization. However, typically the vulnerable will often find themselves bullied and Stockholm Syndrome brainwashed into the self-serving denials and rationalizations of their abusers.

    In such a poor frame of mind one may consistently fail to respond to outreach while remaining pliant to exploitation. And this may be further exacerbated by isolation, conditioning and tradition, the more so where sexroles are a factor.

     

    The Mask of Narcissism

    There is more to be said about the common debilitating fears of women, conditioning to all the wrong signals and against all the right ones, and how this is routinely exploited, particularly by way of devious and intimidating Persecutor-Rescuer headgames under the oppressive and hypocritical mimesis of the Honor-Protection Racket. That, alas, just as it is so often the most duplicitously evil even more so than just the spinelessly bland that become most adept at insinuating themselves into the lives and social circles of the women they so covertly pursue, that socially expected bogus non-threatening Mr. Rogers mask which anyone ought to see through where one not in conditioned traumatic denial, is often most skillfully worn by the creepiest most palpably Narcissistic self-involved two-faced hypocritically possessive "protective" bullies as part of the devious emotional hot and cold treatment by which they break down resistance and extort stunned compliance. For the icy calm of the abuser offers the desperate target of abuse some respite by which they can be bribed and become conditioned to. There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you.

    Just as such Narcissistic character may be either criminal outright in their exploitation or just unremittingly petty and conniving, they may also be either self sufficient in their methods, or they can be tightly organized in close collusion calculatingly fabricating and maintaining a social environment tailored to support their self-serving abuse.

    Such malignant counterfeit is never truly a secure web of close relations and connections. Safety and security will only be an illusion of connection where really there is only isolation and manipulation to the collective agenda, especially for women.

    So it remains the responsibility of women to master the overwhelming terror and knee-jerk response that rises at the implicit and violent rape-threat of prudish judgment and persecution, however "protective", and never, ever, to compete in so-called "virtue" with the more-virtuous-than-thou in their own ranks, but, instead, to deflate them decisively, continually and consistently.

    And, always, however, without any of the opposing sex
    ually active social climbing Catch-22 cooler-than-thou peer pressure, either, of course, which is the true prostitution needing no less to be disrupted and defused than the ubiquitous movable convent.

    Rather, if women ever truly want equal respect, the genuine article and not the euphemistic semblance of the Double Standard, to uphold, zealously, Do-Me Feminism and the individual dignity of risk and of sex for pleasure and never to be conned, even as adults, into enduring as charity and accepting the control of such malignant disrespect that even children, quite frankly, should not.

    Fear not, but always be glad to threaten the ignorant and evil, and make the most of it. For as Winston Churchill well said it, those who will surrender freedom for peace shall have neither and appeasers never prosper. Such great truth seldom stays in fashion, yet it returns again and again.

    As Adolph Hitler writes in MEIN KAMPF "Like a woman, whose spiritual sensitiveness is determined less by abstract reason than by an indefinable emotional longing for fulfilling power and who, for that reason, prefers to submit to the strong rather than the weakling - the mass, too, prefers the ruler to a pleader."

    Hence, in chronic recapitulation of childhood experience of dysfunctional family, not only any such a woman, but any such masses, Masochistically romance, enable and support just the sort of jumped up little Fuehrer they deserve, effectively inflicting tyranny on all the rest of us as well.

    This is precisely why Nietzsche abhorred any such involvement as might socially sublimate the entirely individual will to power, health and growth. And why the ideal of democracy is a society which distinctly remains the shared tool for the advantage and protection of each individual rather than merely a perverited collective outlet.

    But while the sense of membership, any personal relationship to society as an abstract entity remains as much dangerously deluded fantasy as personal relationship to God, interpersonal relationships certainly are emotional outlets, and should be, quite aside from tangible and practical benefit.

    nevertheless, one may either accept such outlets as are sanctioned by tyranny, or else hold out for anything better. And this still proves not only a matter of individual personal responsibility, but democratic social responsibility as well.

    Personal relationships are seldom truly apolitical. They all impact any immediate social network and contribute, for better or worse, to the interaction of society. Acceptance in any kind of relationship makes acceptance a factor and some sort of a commodity in society while any bullying in any relationship thereby manifests as a mode of discourse in society, both of wider influence for the bully and isolation and exploitation of the targets of bullying.

    Life on every level may be seen as the struggle to establish healthy give and take connections, and against the snares and mayhem of cynical co-exploitation compulsions and the domineering imposition and actingout of emotionally brutalizing interpersonal roles.

     

    Where the Boys Are

    Why play games? Generally, game playing is an obstacle, confusion and a distraction from real value. Instead, how can the desired behaviors and responses be elicited?

    For example, honest answers to honest questions can be had from honest people to begin with. Whereas, unlike perhaps the deep rewards possible in effort at nurture and seduction towards the shy and withdrawn, the challenge of fencing and drawing out the truth from habitual liars seldom actually pays off in any way even when successful, at least in any relationship save antagonism and enmity outright. (Clearly, misplaced sympathy and deep identification with the undeserving, however laudable, will indeed often prove itself a snare, if there are ever any reasonable expectations in return whatsoever.)

    And, likewise, for a desirable woman, fishing for complements is certainly just as easy as senseless bickering, at least with just about any man who does not actually withhold all manner of praise what so ever. Moreover, dalliance and flirtation are easy enough foreplay to pass the time pleasantly, given cooperation and barring all such manipulative and undue disruption that, as a requisite of dignity and Civility, must never be excused or tolerated.

    Often, for women now a days, the challenge and discipline of applied self-knowledge, however, may be to identify from worldly experience and inner life whatever deeper and subtler inner needs from others, to then research and consider how next, by trial and error, to systematically recreate similar openings and effective triggers for whatever such similarly beneficial interactions.

    Because emotional rescue comes quickest for those who actually and actively wish to be found. And such is the first step in the overthrow of unfortunate conditioning and maladaptation and the beginning of recovery from corruption in the Nietzschean sense by the reclamation of one's own vital instincts.

    And in that light it should become plain and manifest that unlike the docile Mr. Rogers mask or the threatening ogre making "for your own good" excuses, a decent man should have a normal range of emotion and even free opinions of his own; and a circle of friends should be of mutual support, not reciprocal domineering exploitation and jockeying for manipulative advantage.

    So, if you are a woman who's current social network is not optimal to your own best agendas, then whatever kind of men you are looking for, to find them, go where they are. motivated goal put forth

    For example, just any any competent gold-digger becomes a trophy-wife by going where the rich congregate, then one need not be so mercenary motivated to be at all actively goal directed and genuinely selective, as, for example, to put forth and carry out the goal of finding a man with a sense of humor, find out where and when local aspiring stand-up comics get together to practice shtick. Or, for another example, to meet a professional and an animal lover, try the hotel bar during a veterinarians convention. Or for an outdoorsy type, why not hang out at a camping supply store? (Men are easy. We can be had!)  

    That is, of course, for the time being and in so far as anyone knows and can identify what one will best respond to in others. It is hoped that future interaction on the frontiers of highly advanced automated Sociometry will accomplish as much better and more reliably. In the interim, assertive common sense may be best for women, in order not to be bullied.

    And even to break away from the herd and become more accessible, even, for example, just to dance more. Unless, of course, you are still just loitering to engage CubanJoe and his Wingmen!

    The key is that while we are all needy, not everyone need be utterly self absorbed. It only makes sense, then, to actually test for the ability to relate and to be accepting. 

    Anyone attractive enough to childishly aggravate and toy with would be suitors and waste everybody's time, would be far better off to simply name their own terms, not only to their own best advantage, but also to cultivate such opportunity as to offer the world the best one has to give; and forego the extortion of withholdance for fear of rejection, an interminable involvement that saps vitality for all involved. 

    Good men often just don't have game. Bad men play games. Coquettish hoops to jump through filter out good men in favor of bad men. Ambivalent caution not to offend judgmental prudery, becomes for all intents and purposes, timid submissive approval seeking from intolerant controlling people. Therefore never allow yourself to be steered by conditioned social reflexes and lead about by the nose by just anyone. Never be so quick to surrender the initiative into casual bad faith. Don't be touchy and hesitant, and don't be malleable either. Evil doers are often so slick because they are amorally sociopathic, with no feelings to perturb them, while moral and conscientious individuals more authentic and readily affected, not to mention more courageous and willing to undertake social risks, may consequently trip over their own proverbial feet of clay and even become haunted and nervous, especially when being deviously bullied by unscrupulous romantic rivals.

    Don't merely delay obvious situational choices and decisions in the same old rut, but help break the ice, flirt, make conversation, hold up your end of the conversation, interview each prospect and look for good leads. And always consider the source. Even if one does insist upon playing hard to get, one must nevertheless all the more encourage the other party in order to keep them interested and persistent, lest they simply interpret no answer as an answer no, and then accept "no" for an answer, rather than shouldering uncertain social risk in a fruitless pursuit.

    This is only what your mother should have taught you!

    Never tolerate nor buy into to unasked "protective" possessive or hostile behavior, neither from strangers nor acquaintances. Even though passivity in such a circumstance does relieve one of the responsibility of active short term decision and dire choice. In truth, acquiescence to bullies is a dire choice indeed. Do not rationalize your own feelings of intimidation, as this opens the way to classic Stockholm Syndrome where in terrified hostages of criminals in their desperation for hope, are even known to convince themselves that their kidnappers are actually protecting them from the police!

    However, on the other hand, while simply walking away from all such ugly posturing may seem like the more mature response for a woman, that may often be exactly how the devious cockblocking gatekeeper Relational Bully isolates rivals and scapegoats to thereby limit and control a woman's freedom and choice of association. That is why any such rival or scapegoat must always be defended and the bully humiliated by failure and exposure, every time they attempt such hypocritical manipulative pranks and headgames. Upholding of civility and fair play remains crucial in functional rôle modeling of legitimate moral authority. Otherwise self-serving possessive and controlling bullies and hypocritical lust crazed prudes will continue to actually seize the moral high ground in disfunctional emulation of the blustering moralistic tyranny under which we all live.

    Of course, real hostage situations and the like alluded to here are extreme and mind-bending. But we are now only making a metaphor to more ordinary day to day life. And therefore, the following question is utterly begged of some people:

    What, are you actually that helpless?? Don't you know your own mind? Aren't you responsible to speak for yourself? And how can one tell who would really respond, or who would just run away, if anyone ever actually cried out for help in any real emergency? Probably not some self serving posturing bully. Knee-jerk hostility has even less value and greater danger even than any other cheapened false sentimentality. 

     

    Got game? Game is the shameless cutthroat predatory ongoing research and practice into procedure of tricks exploiting female psychology for sexual purposes, even justified as turn about seen as fair play for feminine whiles, the oldest game by women upon men, in modern civilized affluence no longer as much an actual matter of survival, and perhaps therefore no longer as engendering of sympathy to soften resentment.

    So, if one party does all what they learn to hope will favorably Behaviorally prompt the other, then who is controlling whom? So is the man absorbed in game, Alpha masterful or merely henpecked, even castrated? And is the woman perpetually toying with just such men, the queen bee or a slave to expectation?  

    What is game, really after all, but short for congame or headgame? As Nietzsche admonishes, a king of fools is only the greatest fool. In the fanatically dedicated practice of game, who does one become, and whom does one attract? Reciprocal exploitation is a consistent feature of attachment disordered codependency. Worse however, game need not be even tacitly informed and nominally consensual. Pathological manipulation by nature, tends also ensnare and abuse the unwitting, ill equipped and vulnerable. Worse still, game is often socially expected and amorally Moralistically destructively enforced by the most competitively monopolistic cliquish and controlling serial bullies, cockblockers externalizing their own self loathing of everything decent, vulnerable, passionate, unscripted, spontaneous and genuine which they so mightily repress in themselves and then in society by so relentlessly denigrating others. racket

    A congame is much the same thing as a racket being any dishonest scheme or ongoing transaction, all not as it contrives to present itself and as is tacitly accepted or endured by the majority of those involved, but in actuality a scam or fraud, a deceptive practice of coercion and manipulation conducted for the benefit of a few cronies at the expense of the many. One old racket is artificial scarcity: The masses will always comply in ever greater effort and diligence jumping through hoops and fighting amongst ourselves for scraps, believing and rationalizing just about anything, all in order to obtain whatever artificial scarcity and bait-and-switch, no matter how plainly contrived.

    There can be no economy without scarcity, incidental and unavoidable or artificial and very much avoidable. Again, artificial scarcity is a racket. And one such racket is dubbed the sexual economy:

    “While intrigued by the difficulties that people seemed to be having when exchanging strokes, I was guided by Hogie Wyckoff to Wilhelm Reich’s ideas about the sex economy.” Reich introduced the concept in the 1930’s at a time when the Nazis were dominating the social landscape of Germany. Reich argued that since, according to Freud, sexual repression was the cause of neurosis, the remedy would be a guilt-free and active sex life. In his book The Sexual Revolution (1936) Reich argued that fascism was a symptom of sexual repression and that the Nazis intentionally controlled sexual exchanges among German youth for the purpose of promoting conformity to their fascist program. As an antidote to this sex economy Reich established the Socialist Association for Sexual Counseling and Research, which organized counseling centers for German youth and workers. You can bet these centers were disbanded as soon as Hitler took power.”

     

    — 'The Heart of the Matter: Love, Information and Transactional Analysis' By Claude Steiner PhD

     
     
    The Battle of the Sexes is classic prisoner's dilemma of fraternization with the enemy wherein each side is terrified to move for fear that the other will defect. That is why, in the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” Indeed, a subversive collusion, if any good, according to George Orwell... For happiness and security depend only upon collusion, continually thwarted by a milieu of mistrust, the setting of ongoing witch hunt. From time immemorial, slut shaming has scapegoated womankind deemed sinfully beguiling, for masculine desire, in return denounced as bestial and intrusive.
     
    Thence the implicit coercion of slut shaming manipulates women into prudish cognitive dissonance and passive silence, fear, irresponsible timid self service, and noncommittal apathy as rival suitors and scapegoats are  cockblocked and manbashed. Worse, under heteronomy to the Honor Protection Racket, women are made thankful. It's for your own good, dear! Precisely thus are desirable women readily subdued and monopolized as a resource for which unattached men must then cronyistically curry favor with bullying  cliques. Indeed, if and to whatever extent the looniest predictions of the most virulent Reactionary bigotry have ever come to pass, to the effect that with increasing acceptance of sexual deviance, more normal orientations would progressively fall under repressive persecution, then who's fault is that? It has been a grave mistake to assume that even the most normal, average "plain vanilla" sexuality is therefore privileged beyond any need of activist advancement, eternal vigilance in defense of sexual liberation.

     

     

     

     

     
     
    Make love not rape!
    Sex hasn't been the same since women started enjoying it.  — Lewis Grizzard
     
    Jesus   SLUTS,
                                   don't you?
     
    It remains most instructive how the very concept of t h e SLUTWALK  even in 
    unifying protest against sexual assault, remains open to two vastly opposing and conflated interpretations:
     
       The liberating sex positive variable Individualistic message in vehement rejection of oppressive feminine modesty:  

     

    MAKE LOVE NOT RAPE
                                     I do what I want
    What's under my short skirt is mine: 
    To share or not as ever I please                                      
     
     
    Easy virtue is it's own reward !
    Licentious lechery is good, intrinsically and requires no justification
     
    Provocative dress, expression and conduct, sheer lewdness and licentious vulgarity, is a fundamental right, and lots of fun: When individuals are isolated, intimidated and fear to simply reach out to one another in attraction and for gratification, we will only be dominated, abused and exploited by those better connected and privileged. In a free society, happiness cannot be guaranteed, but in eternal vigilance, the right of expression and pursuit of desire, especially for one another, must be preserved and protected from oppression, all...   

    VS.

    inherent culture clash by conflicting with simply: look don't touch because:

    You can't judge a book by it's lack of cover:  A demand for presumption of chastity 
     
     
     
     
    Hence, alas: The lady doth protest too little!
    timidly proclaiming wounded innocent naivety rather than asserting the dignity of sexual maturity and freedom
     
     
      

    So hard just being easy: keeping abreast of concealed controversy    

     

     

     

     

     

     

     

    versus    

    cocktease, much?                                                                                        
     
     
    Yes, she might be really asking for it, but maybe just not from you or me! Bummer. We are all even routinely subjected to all manner of advertisement for so much that we can't have. Sexual provocation is free expression in and of itself entailing no obligation, an in good faith opening at best. Yet we retain every civil right, in every height of refined subtlety to every depth of flagrant vulgarity, from heights of consummate skill and confidence to depths of flagrant awkward desperation, all nevertheless without fear, restriction or impediment, to freely engage one another in the pursuit of happiness, exploration of opportunity at all, even with no guarantee of successful accord, let alone ultimately of satisfaction and happiness. A free society encourages social risk by lowering the stakes of misstep and failure, while a repressive and controlling society raises the stakes ever more catastrophically. And that is exactly what bullying cliques always do, and why they must be stopped.
     
    Indeed, most sexual positively, autonomy and first of all the protected right to consent, fighting for their right to be dirty, may be fiercely embraced as the very bulwark of justice and resistance against all violation of consent
     
    “A nymphomaniac is a women as obsessed with sex as the average man.”  — Mignon McLaughlin
     
    “I am a free lover. I have an inalienable, constitutional and natural right to love whom I may, to love as long or short a period as I can; to change that love every day if I please.”   — Victoria Woodhull
     
     
    Alas, most prudishly, and in line with all of the malignantly oppressive Patriarchy, Fauxminism (faux Femininsm) that so fraudulently passes itself off as Militant Feminism nowadays, the message of the SlutWalk may instead be understood most literally as demanding merely protection only of free expression in apparel, under the presumption of all virtue and modesty regardless: look don't touch. -Provocation and attraction only in the abstract. As ever, Fauxminism, which is sex-negarive and persecutory, distorts Feminism, making enemies of the natural friends of Feminism which is truely egalitarian, inclusive and distinctly sex positive in sexual liberation. 
     
    But in the words of Alexander Woollcott: "Nothing risqué, nothing gained." Indeed, worst of all, the presumption of virtue only meets the cynically manufactured needs of expectation of virtue under cruel and destructive social enforcement thereof, the vindictive, corrupt and cronyistic social contract by mass coercion that is heteronomy to the Honor Protection Racket, a concept of domination and exploitation, of unaccountable abuse of power with utter impunity, wherein whatever putative offences against prudish propriety, being expressive after all of exogamy and infidelity, are systematically terrorized and manipulatively repressed into cognitive dissonance in fearfully rationalized and willfully blind denial of the ugly reality of classic prisoner's dilemma: Unstated and taken as given, slut shaming of women is as ever to averited only by manbashing:
     
    Whatever may be deemed impropriety, is then readily slandered howsoever as violation of consent, consent after all bearing the onus of slatternly disgrace and persecution. By such demeaning manipulation and coercion is achieved indeed the flagrant invalidation and brutal usurpation of consent. Women can be made chattel while romantic rivals, peer group outsiders, can be demonized and made fair game, again by precisely the most viciously antediluvian Patriarchy, as ever, so routinely and hypocritically fobbed of as the very forefront of Militant Feminism.  
     
    “It is far easier for a woman to lead a blameless life than it is for a man; all she has to do is to avoid sexual intercourse like the plague.”  — Angela Carter
     
    There really is no term for a sexually active or sexually open woman that is not derogatory. Use value, physical, emotional, help, assistance and comfort in life, every good thing, all of it, is at best taken for granted and actually vilified as to lower exchange value! Obviously, this peculiar exchange rate was never set by lonely guys. You know, the nice ones, who are always finishing last, as the saying goes. nevertheless, it remains the truth, that virgins are boring! Thus it must be hoped that tolerance is not, in truth, the exclusive hall mark of the utter luzer and undesirable. For yet does it escape me what can be so tantalizing about domineering sexist prudery, judgment and abuse. 
     
    “Aren't women prudes if they don't and prostitutes if they do?”   — Kate Millett
     
    The intimidation that so typically obstructs men and women from approaching one another, is more than the mere lack of confidence or self esteem, even though the even comically over parented sexual trade unionists, as those of such jealous and controlling mentality are sometimes classified under sexual economics theory, so frown upon dating "out of one's league" and conditions us all against reaching out for what and for whom we desire. Rather, the intimidation comes from slut shaming and man bashing, and the ongoing classic prisoner's dilemma, wherein each party has been made acutely aware of the need to denounce the other first, in order to save themselves. That is why, the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” Otherwise, at best, an intimidated armed truce will be achieved in good standing with their peers, making do, emasculated and defeminized, respectively. Such is heteronomy. On the other hand instead, at any merest spark of trust and collusion, the cliquish cockblockers and  Relational Bullies, ever watchful, in all of their Sadistic self serving prudery, will leap into actingout with self righteous intolerance, cruelty and impunity.
     
    Moralism aside, anyone no matter how graceful, considerate and forthright a mensch, may come to be treated as a pest or worse, purely because of the irresponsible awkward squeamish self serving of hypocrites. To yield, sexually, is slatternly. But to abstain from sex is uncool and even stuck-up, hence grounds for prude-shaming. And given that slut shaming is gendered to feminine sexrole, then the equivalent for targeting men, is, of course, manbashing, or perhaps even, to coin a new term: creep shaming. Women are not entirely more vulnerable than men. The masculine sexrole is only at all differently vulnerable than that of women. Whatever awful shamming and abuse is reserved for women, howsoever in inferior standing, nevertheless by whatever bogus Patriarchic Chivalry, women may count upon be spared the particular kind of threat and abuse that only the defense of fragile felinity chronically excuses against callow and brutish masculinity. Such is the classic exploitative and divisive sexrole tradeoff of the Honor Protection Racket.
     
    WE ARE ALL SLUTS/ SLUT AND BE COUNTED slutsunite.orgAll both parties really need to do is finally admit that they enjoy sex! But for women that is a disgrace, while therefore from men deemed a threat, and therefore potentially an offence. The prospect of collusion is an overture to sex as a subversive act, as Orwell and Dickey indicate, is by that token the consummation of the deepest wish for acceptance obstructed by the worst fears of entrapment and persecution manifestation of positive and negative transference, respectively, as defined by Freud. Trust, openness and acceptance are far more difficult than denial and manipulative codependency or simple inertia and stalemate.
     
    Better then to be "rescued" and socially accepted even so conditionally than to be unjustly blamed, tabooed, defamed, branded and subjected to slut shaming! Exactly such consistent conniving and unfeeling exploitation only mirrors conditioning by the experience and observation of dysfunctional family life. Worse, still, when the lure of acceptance at all is only sucker bait, a set up for cruel rejection, danger and insecurity.
     
    Tactics of their own deliberately reduced use value are often precisely how the consequently even paradoxically despised popular often create artificial scarcity to inflate their own exchange value. Whereas, low social standing in order to reduce exchange value beneath use value is a means of exploiting the oppressed for whatever they have to offer.
     
    That is the true reason for and what promotes insecurity, resentment, dependency, control and possessiveness, no matter how rationalized, glorified and propagandized. And that is why Orwell states explicitly that, and even no matter how seemingly or ostensibly "vanilla," the intimacy of good sex at all is already taboo and deviant, a threat to society, simply in being such an Existentially authentic subversive act of collusion in a world of divisive chronic suspicion and oppressive mass control. In George Orwell's '1984' that is what Winston and Julia had and why they had to be destroyed by IngSoc. Because, from the very beginning, like unto battered spouses all, we are each already promised to another, being Big Brother with his recruits everywhere, eager self appointed minions all, ever watching our every move and thought. Divide and conquer: If you're not suppose to talk to me, then what am I not supposed to tell you? Again, the divisively bullied and scammed, must be brought together in order at long last to compare notes.
     
    There are those who investigate the universe and those who investigate the human condition. But a sycophantic bully only needs to know which way the wind blows. Bullies deal in not merely constructed but actually contrived (and with malice aforethought) social reality of consensus manipulation. In a pinch, bullies, who, with impunity, do everything and worse that they ever falsely accuse anyone else, can just invent often picayune fraudulent complaints and even fragile anonymized or utterly fictional nonexistent damsels in distress out of thin air! Because women are all too consistently bullied into silence and conflict aversion. And, in classic confidence trickery, this is then called "privacy", all "for their own good". All despite the simple truth that anyone living in the fear of constant peer scrutiny of their private lives actually enjoys precious little real sense of privacy. And no one is ever expected to double check malicious gossip. No matter how vague, suspect, or damaging. Truth and justice are not even values in play, but actually taboo.
     
    Marriage has been a business contract from time immemorial, long before any notion of romance ever entered into the bargain. And dating, after all, began in as a form of soft-core prostitution practiced by underpaid and lonely immigrant women, the original dinner whores, in Michigan before the turn of the last century. Sexual economics theory posits that heterosexual communities can be analyzed as marketplaces in which men offer women resources such as love, esteem, money, and exclusivity in exchange for sex. But statistically, women are observed to become more open minded and sexually active under conditions of increasing economic gender equality. Yes, justice brings peace, even in the battle of the sexes! As things stand, however, sexual trade unionism among other forms of extortion rackets, persists, being: implicit and for all intents and purposes collective bargaining in exclusion of free agency. This takes the form of possession, domination and control, physical and emotional violence, the glorification of jealousy, bullying, shunning and mobbing, even to the point of orchestrated harassment, slut shaming and cockblocking. In the famous words of Benjamin Franklin: They who can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety.  Sexual trade union, as it is called, does not balance power against any equivalent to the overwhelming advantage of management, nor does sexual trade union contribute any sort of capital or technology the way that management does. Rather, sexual trade union only suppresses free agency and innovation in order undermine competition against vested interest. Whereas truly functional social networking and introduction seeks only to maximize benefit according to the desires of each end user, the unchecked moral hazard of sexual trade union, like unto slave ownership or pimping, allows bullying cliques by extortion to control and so flagrantly to exploit the use value of the individual.
    Lying hypocritical self-serving Persecutor-Rescuer covert relational hostility is no deterrent to actual Sexual Harassment. Because Persecutor-Rescuer, in and of itself, is either Sexual Harassment or slut shaming against both the "rescued" and the "rescued from" who will typically be either a competitor male or rival suitor,scapegiated target of bullying, or simply opportunistic prey of random Sadism. Even if the power abused by serial cockblockers, those the bogus knight-errants in the classic Persecutor-Rescuer headgame, may be utterly unauthorized by any standard no matter how trumped up. or even as often indeed a complete bluff of intimidation and shock on the part of complete strangers! Staged or fictitious events may be employed in false accusations and groundless complaints, prelude to abuse of power or the recruitment of unwitting proxies and utter tools. Moreover, come to think of it, it seems somewhat unlikely that the cowardly hypocritical Relational Bullies actingout chronic jealous rage, will ever find either the courage or the compassion for genuine intervention in any real danger or abuse, being of course, in actuality, their protected privilege of the powerful and connected behind the veil of secrecy and hypocrisy. 
     
    I'd forgotten just how much I ENJOY BEING A SLUT 
    until we broke up and I resumed my slutty ways
    All of this is why it is so especially important amid the bullying circle, to thwart and to expose all such hypocritical Persecutor-Rescuer types and tactics of Relational Bullying in action, and so help to preserve freedom of association compromised by the imposition of cliquishness. Healthy interaction in plain site is crucial to showing the abused that they have alternatives. And so, naturally, cliques of bullies will always want to exclude and deter any such thing, and always to be running the only game in town. 
    The Clique Busters Zen, the moral bottom line, is, can we continue to tolerate self serving Sexist prudish oppression and odious bullying, sanctimonious terror against women and the victim blaming and scapegoating that is man-bashing, hypocritically masquerading as bizarre socially mandated Knight Errantry? Would you ever speak up against this evil, and talk back to such bullies, given the opportunity and the presence of mind? Would you ever condone actually setting up the appropriate situations, and mounting a vigorous, persistent and systematic opposition? And can low guile ever be morally and strategically appropriate? -Not to mention, highly entertaining!

     

     
     
     
    Virtue will hurt you!
    And easy virtue is it's own reward!

     

     
    Answer: It doesn't matter if you got the answer right.
    Because, no matter what, society and pop culture will work together to tell both of these girls that they are wrong. Have sex with even one person? You're a slut. Don't have sex with anyone? You're a prude. You can't win, and that's just how they like it.
     
    This message brought to you by The Riot
     

     

    The malignant purpose of slut shaming  
    Feminine virtue or modesty,
    in euphemistic doubletalk: "respect," remains a concept of both of domination of women not to mention then of revenge against men.

            • Gender and double-standards  (Look for my comments in response.)

        “A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp.”  — Joan Rivers

    Behaving as if it all went without saying or question, hypocritical Moralistic slut shaming self-serving judgmental bullies "naturally" keep alive the threat to reputation and then "graciously" offer standards of compliant behavior by which reputation allegedly can possibly, but not reliably, be safe guarded. Because, of course, even this remains uncertain and at the discretionary pleasure of the evil gossiping judgmental bullies and anonymous back fence Yentas.

    And this sort of conditioning procedure fearful uncertainty and instability is really nothing more or less than intimidation, terror and extortion, a classic Protection Racket, among the oldest of the all, the Honor Protection Racket! That's the racket wherein subtext of helpful hints are dropped, making a great favor of intimidation, offering as it does, opportunity for compliance. Because one would not care to dwell upon the social consequences of deciding one's own mind, heart in order to own one's own body! Slut shaming extorts passive bystanding from women in order to permit cockblocking of prospective romantic rivals. In turn, cockblocking socially isolates women into cliques of slut shaming cockblocking bullies and cronies.

    “There are no good girls gone wrong, just bad girls found out.”  — Mae West

    But what to call slut shaming when it's targeted again a male rather than a female, when it's manbashing instead of misogamist? How about: creep shaming. Just as, concurrent with the hatespeach feminine pejorative 'slut' for perfectly ordinary needs and urges, slut shaming denigrates sexual availability concurrent with feminine sexrole, likewise with 'creep' serving as hatespeach pejorative for male suitors howsoever perceived as undesirables, creepshaming might name the denigration of sexual interest or aggression concurrent with masculine sexrole, women being sluts and men being lechers.

    Whether by slut shaming, creep shaming, or any other devious and malevolent ploy or tactic, the motivated goals, even if never openly and explicitly put forth, of these hypocritical cockblocking tactics of covert relational hostility, is to limit contacts and options for women and leave them vulnerable to exploitation within a relationship and/or the limited social circle of the bullying clique. Standard Pimpology, isolate and dominate!

    So, always watch out for third party manipulation and intimidation. Social circles match making often have their own cynical agendas. And this goes especially for divisive intrigues, hostility and subterfuge, running interference even between strangers and newcomers, not to mention actually conniving and conspiring to drive wedges between long standing friends and couples and then pimping off the newly available desirable women onto blind dates to incur prestige and favors owed.

    Such tactics and practices, the power over men by influence and domination over women, monopolizing connections no less than any other vital resource, is sometimes known as controlling the honey pot.

    And the dirtier they play just to draw others in and keep them in their orbit, the more manipulative and codependent will be the relationships and peer interaction that accrues therefrom. 

    Never be a people pleaser, an approval seeker, especially not from abusive or indifferent high status individuals who don't really need you. 

    JUST STOP VIGILANTE POLICING MY BODY!Like Goldilocks' porridge, indecisive, always to hot or too cold, but never just right! Thus, anyone can be vulnerable to ridicule and defamation of slut shaming or else of  prude-shaming. Or a man may be deemed clueless and passive, shy, a wimp, unless they even possibly risk creep shaming or even resort to the most puerile manipulation. Aggression or whatever manipulative dishonesty in men, no less than whatever compliance in women, is always insufficient or excessive, never just right. Unless, of course, one is popular and thus can do no wrong either way. It's all about power. So of course, it is no accident that popular girls can get away with far greater sexual activity and even range of simultaneous partners, reputations unblemished. Otherwise, no conceivable extreme of lonely "virtue" can ever stand beyond reproach.
     
    There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you. That is why even unpopular virgins are routinely slut shamed, let alone prude-shamed, while influential and well connected are lionized for all that the ostracized are condemned, Women, do not put out in order to be accepted, as that is only entrapment for prudish judgmental rejection. But do not become sexually repressed or distant either, as this often renders women unable to function sexually except with unfeeling consummate liars more than willing to play such headgames and de-emphasize sex simply in order to get sex. (Because courteous and/or caring people, by contrast, are too honest for all of that, and won't sink to all of that, or even know how.) Nor withhold sex in order to extort approval, because of the conditionality of said approval, a snare into becoming dominated, frustrated, exploited, discouraged, held back, taken for granted as an emotionally distant dysfunctional mother substitute. 

     

    Catch-22. You can't win, so don't play. The only wining move is not to play.

    Avoid both prudish Sexism and cooler-than-thou with extreme prejudice!    

    Declares Laura Wood, The Thinking Housewife: “The well-educated slut has been fed a pack of lies. Let’s face it. For all her credentials and impressive grades, she is stupid! Promiscuity plunders a woman’s soul and wrecks her ability to love.” (Indeed, along the slutty Tantric path upon the sadly misguided Zen quest of futility and non attachment, such precisely, is actually the deliberate goal put forth!) “It keeps many from ever marrying at all or from having children. It is ultimately unappealing to men.”

    But are any of the three preceding claims scientific? What would be the Empirical standards of refutation? Under what conditions, particularly of culture and especially self fulfilling prophesy, might any of the assertions in question, tired traditional truisms as they may be, nevertheless ever tend to be true (correspondent to reality)? What would be the controls? And are there any pertinent statistics?

    Actually, it turns out that initial sexual interaction as readily leads to longer term relationship as anything the more at least ostensibly Platonic. -slut shaming bigotry not withstanding, that so virulently insists: Those hussies cannot love as we do!

    Therefore never protest innocence in response to slut shaming! Never step into that trap! "The lady doth protest too much, methinks." Hamlet, Act 3, scene 2, line 254. Actually, any protest is already too much: For as Aesop evinces in the fable of The Wolf and the Lamb, the unjust only become haughty and irritated by the reasoning of the innocent. Worse, as regards slut shaming no less than Homophobic bigotry or persecution of any other deviance or taboo, protesting circumstantial innocence decries only any alleged particular miscarriage of justice, thereby by implication, effectively legitimizing both whatever mythological criterion and twisted values of judgment in play, along with any quasi-authority of the self appointed judges, both of which instead must be publicly exposed, consistently undermined and denounced as humiliatingly as possible. Because bullying unpunished only persists.

    Would you ever want to have any sort of so-called friend who hates, say: your ethnic group, but makes a special exception in your case? Would you ever then howsoever seek to tone down your ethnicity for their comfort and approval? No? Then why become demure, restrained and conditioned by dysfunctional unmanly men who actually loath women and fear the very sexual expression and acceptance that they also so badly yearn for?

    "I have worked in MANY offices, and what's sometimes called "sexual harassment" goes on CONSTANTLY in ALL of them. However, it's USUALLY what's also called "flirting" and "teasing." Some women and men don't like to be flirted with or teased, and so we DON'T PESTER THEM. But some of the other men and women (the smart, friendly ones) are sort of HURT if you don't flirt and tease back and forth with them a little. (It's an ancient primate grooming thing, you wouldn't understand.) "sexual harassment" or "flirting" can become almost interchangeable, depending on which way you're out to GET somebody." rants the notorious Reverend Stang of the Church of the Subgenius.

    Indeed differing expectations, if even they are at all clear, may co-abide in any willingness to live and let live. But, alas, all such good will and good sense so often be found in short supply must indeed be prized and cultivated.

         “No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy.”
     
             — Henry Kissinger

    Remember: A true gentleman does not speak of a lady's indiscretions. A real man seeks collusion, necessitating any degree of trust, not bullying domination predicated only upon implicit leverage or threat. In the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” The prospect of collusion is an overture to sex as a subversive act, as Orwell points out, is by that token the consummation of the deepest wish for acceptance obstructed by the worst fears of Anti-Sex entrapment and persecution manifestation of positive and negative transference, respectively, as defined by Freud. And so, it is only prudent to adopt strategies of social politics that will turn such vulnerability into a strategic advantage. Therefore, it is high time to begin by confronting the lies and the truth as to the nature of popularity, social prominence, and the strategic ramifications thereof: 

    In school, for example, "Certain factors determine who belongs," According to Sociology Professor Patricia Adler. "For boys it's their athletic ability, 'coolness,' toughness or social skills, while for girls it relates to their looks, kinds of clothes, how much freedom they have and their socio-economic status. Girls have an ascribed status, where boys have an achieved status."

    But ascribed status often amounts to status by association or affiliation. Status that is conferred by one person or persons upon another or that rubs off, or such is hoped for. But in this one will be wise to consider the warning by Machiavelli to his Prince against ever calling upon stronger allies "who calls them in they are always disadvantageous; for losing, one is undone, and winning, one is their captive."

    Popularity can either be the same thing as social prominence, or else popularity can be a reflection of demand as evidenced by competition. The popular person is not some pathetic hanger on hoping that popularity will rub off on them. Rather, the popular individual is the one others turn to in order to improve their own social standing and/or to network, professionally, socially and sexually. Whether such "popular" individuals are even well liked, even spinelessly agreeable or actually loathed and despised as oppressive and destructive bullies!

    Machiavelli held that it is better to be feared than to be loved, even if it is also important to be feared without actually being hated.

    Thus, the way for a desirable woman to become influential, is networking by facilitation and connection, by lending her public support by paying attention only to such others as who will respond positively and appreciatively and who's own perception and standing will be seen to be enhanced by the affiliation, and all such value lost without impunity, to anyone who so ever whosoever would find the sheer temerity to metaphorically bite the proverbial hand that feeds them.

    For such is the practical and public demonstration of popularity, of status, all via the acclaim for the manifest and obvious ability to confer upon others elevation in their own social standing and/or to open doors for others, socially, which additional latter power and opportunity must arise as a by product of the former.

    In this case, it truly is better to give than to receive, in order to be sought after. Then it may be hoped that sex among other things, may even reside in the domain of entirely personal elective and free choice, as it should be, not a matter for consensus approval. That core privacy and autonomy may be regained and preserved. Even thus to flout the trumped up authority of whatever Alpha clique with impunity, because she remains in demand. And a woman with the initiative and in demand will not be such a vulnerable target for bullies and cannot so easily be slut shamed and made "cheap". Particularly not so long as men even compete for her favor. But this will only be possible for a woman who neither diminishes herself by relying upon artificial scarcity nor depends upon popular bullies for social introductions and networking. Which no even remotely desirable woman really actually does, unless she's pretty much been conned and/or intimidated into it. Don't be.

     

    Sexual harassment (as distinct from out and out sexual assault at the most extreme, and faux pas of common flirtation, "grooming", inopportune awkwardness, whatever innocent lechery or ordinary rudeness at the lesser extreme) is, very specifically, the abuse of power and privilege of one form or context or another, in pressing unwanted sexual advances, demands or even twisted and distorted sexual hostility, characterized whatever persecution and defamation of any kind, bullying in the form of bizarre and bafflingly obtuse verbal abuse and humiliation, slander, innuendo, accusation, threat, all cryptically unfolding possessive overtures to covert relational hostility under whatever pretext of any legitimate interaction, and, first of all requires standing or power of whatever sort along with the shield of secrecy and hypocritical obfuscation, to abuse in the first place. Therefore, in case of any accusation, innuendo or suggestion of anything at all like unto sexual harassment, the first rational question ought to be as to the nature of the power and authority to abuse to begin with. Therefore, while the underdog makes a prime target of just such bullying, how can an underdog possibly actually perpetrate sexual  harassment?

    As shall be expounded at greater length throughout, no less than any other conceivable self-serving vested interest, sex remains prime motivation and veritable blue chip social currency in bullying, control, and abuse of power. As discrimination is less tolerated, bullying under any other pretext or opportunity of vulnerability is becoming the new hate crime. But targeting for bullying and exclusion is still often discriminatory, including as for gender, preference, orientation or practices, actual, self-identified, or merely perceived or alleged.

    A related term, coming into usage, to sexual harassment, is: sexual bullying. Perhaps sexual harassment should refer more to distinct actions or behaviors, while sexual bullying as any other means of bullying, should refer more to the ongoing
    relationship of willful and virulent intentional enmity of the oppressors, the bullies, imposed upon the oppressed, the naturally unwilling targets of bullying who suffer without recourse.

    Beyond sexist or otherwise sexually hostile, intentionally offensive and crude or calculatingly insensitive remarks, blatant or evasive, acts and means of sexual hostility in bullying can and frequently do include such blatant sexual harassment as deliberately gross, disgusting and unpleasant sexual contact or sexually hostile behavior and communications. Bullies are frequently quite deceptive in victim blaming and making themselves out as injured parties or even in brazen
    propaganda as pro-social vigilantes of some kind against those whom they have taken upon themselves to judge and sentence as howsoever undesirables. Prurient malicious gossip and backbiting, often in justification of bullying, can typically include prudeshaming backbiting of celibacy, voluntary or involuntary, insults and name calling of undesirability and unattractiveness, malicious gossip falsely or unfair allegation, distinct claim or vague damaging innuendo slut shaming or creepshaming of howsoever untoward conduct, undesired advances, sexual harassment, or sheer ineptitude and strangeness by whatever standards often tabooistically evoked in the nastiest mean spirited subtext. -All of which also serves in relational bullying in order to socially isolate targets of bullying, as well as to shame and undermine the target of bullying psychologically and make them feel however awkward and at fault. And as ever, the resulting social isolation of ostracism against the target of bullying and peer pressure against all who might defend them, effectively suppresses opposing narrative, thereby creating an information vacuum to be filled by whatever chicanery bile imaginable.

    But in truth there remains every difference in principle, on the one hand, between being harmed, threatened or humiliated, such as may violate individual civil rights, and on the other hand, feeling offended, let alone actually choosing to take offense, on the other, from free expression. And in the very nature of autonomy and the protected civil right free expression, of that which, one way or another, others might not like to hear, comes the risk of giving offense.

    Wherever there are powerful perpetrators co-enabled and protected by cronies, to that end expect to find an industry of scapegoating. Wherever there is, with complete impunity, scapegoating by utter tools and serial false accusers, look for the co-enabling powerful perpetrations protected thereby.

    Typically, frequently and most hypocritically, the highly placed executives, officials, quasi-officials and just socially prominent "popular" individuals (even if often actually widely feared and loathed), prominent and powerful frequent perpetrators of true ongoing sexual harassment and worse, typically protect and work closely together in unholy symbiosis facilitating enablement and impunity for shameless serial false accusers who are even known thereby with impunity, to habitually sexually entrap hapless vulnerable and bewildered scapegoats in order to assist in shielding the guilty. Indeed, the extremely disturbed Munchausens are often so well known to feel far safer making up stories manipulatively milking others for sympathy, rather than reaching out for real help by exposing their often genuinely harrowing travails and suffering; and the profoundly victimized are often known actually to protect their own abusers. heteronymous bullies, ever eager to join in abusing others, are especially unlikely to stand up to abuse from more dominant bullies in whatever cliquish hierarchies. Indeed generally, when there is much ado about nothing, there is little regard for that which presents important opportunity or danger. Willful false accusation, great and small, has always been a mainstay in evil doing; so, why would sexual misconduct, great or small, be something that is never falsely accused, indeed, something so infallible?

    We all understand full well, to begin with, how, in whatever social context, the personally intrusive totalitarian zeal of McCarthyist witch hunting of scapegoats and rivals in whatever vested interest, as well as being so indefatigably spiteful and amoral, pointlessly hostile, mindlessly destructive, shockingly ignorant, plug stupid, yet sly and deceitful, being driven by malicious gossip and fantastical hearsay in dishonest concealment of controversy by consistent cult-like willful isolation from conscientious opposition and healthy skepticism, is also typically characterized by the most gross incompetence and negligence of every type, in any manner of whatever might even pass for investigation and response against real malfeasance of any kind whatsoever. Additionally, cronyism reliably affords aid, comfort and protection to true evil doers, typically so well socially embedded in whatever controlling cliques of bullies. And by design, serial false accusation only produces scapegoats to distract from real abuse and protect exactly those guilty parties, conspiratorially. 

    All the above is why true opponents of sexual harassment and of serial false accusation alike, must unite and close ranks against bullying of every kind, without being duped by the spectacle of incendiary hyperbole between various false flag operations and hate groups who effectively cooperate in the promulgation of injustice and flagrant disproportion.

    The problem is, that the net for catching minnows is gossamer fine, spread tissue thin, so that powerful and stealthy sharks and barracudas will readily breach any such translucent boundaries with even less effort than regard, hypocritically sporting haloes as they prey upon the ensnared with utter impunity. Thus, the quaint notion that that because, of course, mindless consistency must be infallible, zero tolerance to begin with naturally escalates with the gravity of whatever the situation, is plainly refuted by repeated observation. Indeed, exactly the reverse is true. Zero tolerance and absurd hysteria consistently escalates with the triviality, injustice and dishonesty of whatever picayune peeve. Zero tolerance is hypocrisy. In the end, zero tolerance policies only mean the same thing as plain intolerance and all comes to nothing more than selective application, scapegoating, bogus security theater at the cost of actual security and public safety, impunity and rampant abuse of power. Instead, it will be impunity that escalates with the gravity and importance of whatever abuse. Zero tolerance is only policy commitment to intolerance, an ill considered debt of evil and sanctimony, that soon comes due. Zero tolerance is a feel-good resolution but unwary and ill considered for the unwise committee, doomed to endless strife the first time they will be held to it. Zero tolerance is like the net so fine as to catch minnows, let alone sharks and barracudas. Without any kind of due process, injustice only escalates unchecked, while security at all falls by the wayside.

    Alas that all just such Byzantine intrigues may be most readily encouraged within any untrustworthy organization or society, wherein a "sacrificial lamb" must be regularly singled out in fraudulent manufacture of any bogus moral high ground even while protecting privileged evil doers. Thus are the malignant twin abuses nigh inextricable. Neither will ever be overcome at the cynically divisive expense of excusing the other. Since time immemorial, divisive scapegoating via the bearing of false witness has always been most prominent amid the repertoire of impunity for abusers and oppressors. Therefore, barring malignant persecutory ulterior agenda, respective advocates of either the genuinely victimized and the falsely accused, lives alike destroyed and both so often even driven to tragic and desperate overreaction including suicide, should be all too eager close ranks instead of engaging in zero-sum quarrel vying so senselessly to invalidate one another. -thereby only playing into the hands of evil doers. After all, enough targets of serial bullying regularly experience both whatever direct abuse and whatever kind of false allegation and malicious gossip in order to rationalize, justify and ever more widely promote and escalate said abuse. But at least both victims and accused of the most gravely criminal offenses, do receive any kind of due process, whereas the more petty either the bullying or the false accusation and picayune innuendo of malicious gossip, the greater the unchecked impunity all thereof without recourse against abuse of power. Alas that truth seeking is so unpopular, whilst entrenched blanket denial both of every conceivable variety of sexual misconduct and of every possible vile stratagem of serial false accusation alike, all persist, despite each new and sordid revelation and ensuing scandal after another.

    Not every rebuff should rightly invite accusations nor favor found be demonized as the fruits of exploitation. One way or another, targets of bullying are so often resented the more in malicious gossip of exaggerated rancor and indistinct innuendo and via covert relational hostility, should they succeed rather than in they fail, romantically as in any other aspect of life. And through it is so often said that Hell hath no fury than out from scorned rejection, nevertheless sheer self serving disappointment, fucker's remorse, consent withdrawn retroactively, may be often become even more vengeful. For there is no slut or creep more reviled than just a bad lay! And while unconsenting violation is a humiliation, lies and innuendo may even be the more terrifying.

    Rather than any honest accountability for whatever ones actions in reality, their actual motivation or responsibility for even the most readily foreseeable consequences; instead, shameless pandering hypocritical Political Correctness amounts to accountability only for the image of ones actions, as filtered through whatever ideological collective, peer group or clique. Systematically perpetuating the most flagrant injustice in any social context, pointlessly maximizing shame and distress all around, the amoral cowardly and cronyistic bureaucratic liability phobia and commotion that persecutorialy panders to the most obvious lunatic false accusation while suppressing legitimate grievances and consistently ignoring actual problems. The threat presented to amoral cowardly and cronyistic craven bureaucratic mentality by the injustice of false and/or absurd and picayune allegation or even vague innuendo, is addressed under the full and unquestioning embrace of every calculating hysteria, while the threat presented to amoral cowardly and cronyistic craven bureaucratic mentality by any genuine grievance is just as consistently addressed by metaphorically sweeping it all under the proverbial rug. Therefore any credible and serious grievance may be cruelly punished and ignored. On the other hand, attention will be lavished upon picayune or false allegations typically concocted claiming, if not unwanted and/or frequent attempts to initiate sexual  relationship, the even of howsoever tasteless prurient or even merely heretical remarks within earshot. All the while, of course, all manner of actual intentionally devious bullying harassment continues with utter impunity. Incentives are extortion, fraudulent litigation, rejection and spite in defamation of the target enhancing the popularity of the bully. Any claim, regardless of how absurd, can take a long time to refute if ever, and the publicity from a long drawn out struggle for justice often remains adverse and costly even after vindication. Meanwhile, legitimate grievances easily die stillborn.

    The malignant sophistries of sexism and of reverse sexism alike: Bogus social justice crusades are all too often little more than the most flagrant and virulent witch hunts and craven abuse of power. Conspiratorial brazen lying and playing for vastly underserved sympathy entails none of the genuine risked vulnerability of true lonely and suffering painful disclosure. Unlike craven false accusers, the actually victimized must consider the danger of further trauma and stress, even likely attack upon their character and scapegoating in order to impeach credibility of their testimony, in deciding whether or not to go forward in even making an issue at all, let alone howsoever actually seeking redress. And such precisely is what inspires the disastrously misguided Fauxmenist Patriarchical mandate of utterly uncritical and unwavering support for all such accusation even into quick and underhandedly secretive bush league vigilante travesty of justice, and damn any troublesome skepticism or rights of the accused. Worse, serial false accusers tend to be flagrant Munchausens who may well even resent ever competing with any genuinely victimized and vulnerable whom they will likely then strive to ward off, as ever, the bad driving out the good.

    The alarmingly high percentage of false and or picayune accusations one way or another, proverbially crying "wolf", not only promotes hysteria, but robs both credibility and vital resources so desperately needed for whatever crucial and desirable investigation and redress of all manner of real dire abuse, violence and degradation. -Something that the Fauxmenists are no more willing to consider, than the idiot Misogamists are capable of comprehending that the way to drive home their ostensible point about man hating double standards, is to close ranks with Feminism in protest events, putting the man bashers on the spot, daring them to continue pretending that men are never slut shamed or indeed, even raped, only every day.

    Therefore, anyone embracing either cause, so clearly and inextricably bound together, merely as a pretext for invalidating the other, only pursues an ulterior agenda of scapegoating and abuse while planting their hypocritical fraudulently self justifying false flag of Existential Validation on a false moral high ground of self serving vengeful sanctimony. The prudish Fauxminists would have us all believe that the injustice of serial false accusation, damaging innuendo and ostracism, is a small price to be paid by undeservingly privileged penis people anyhow (experiencing only either lust or hunger, sometimes even simultaneously; but that's confusing!), in service of whatever greater good exactly, while the wounded domineering Misogamists live down to the simmering contempt of every vindictive man-basher, by extracting from the ugly truth of serial false accusation, the malignant lie that all women have got it coming anyhow. Worst of all, of course the most exploitative among men and the most virulent man bashers so readily put aside their difference in order to cooperate in cockblocking. Truly, the two camps so richly deserve one another. But the rest of us remain trapped in the withering crossfire of Reactionary culture-war, that can only be ended by marginalizing all hate groups alike.

    .com  

    Alas that passions so enflamed by the issue of sexual harassment and assault are so prevailingly misdirected and exploited for purposes of intimidation, oppression and the indiscriminate vengeance of manbashing, whilst manbashing and false accusation, after all modes of bullying often sinking sexual harassment in their own right, along with the general topic of ubiquitously dysfunctional sexroles in society to begin with, are legitimate issues of men's rights all to often taken as pretexts for all manner of the most  absurd and wounded would be domineering Misogamism. After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. But the truth will out, that the cruelty of any mode of bullying against any target is unacceptable, and any co-opting of the struggle by cause inspired petty vigilantism, covert relational hostility, even fair game gaslighting organized orchestrated harassment, all manner of persecution and counter persecution crusades, of oppressive conniving angry fanatics of any stripe, is a threat that must be continually resisted. CliqueBusters is a truly egalitarian tactical and procedural concept of fairness in action, going beyond merely taking up sides halfcocked or else simple passive bystanding ignoring all danger and suffering.

     
     
    McCarthyism forever and the same eternally self righteous witch hunt
                 Rightwing Feminism is an oxymoron

    In the cult-like fervored ideal of complete support and credence to the vulnerable and victimized, while ever more stringently lowering the bar for accusation of sexual misconduct whatsoever, the most fanatical and misguided crusaders against sexual assault and sexual harassment may even be heard to take great pride in how easy they can make it for victims of sexual assault and sexual harassment to raise the alarm and obtain swift assistance, thereby mobilizing immediate action against the accused, utterly denying by whatever naked Sophistry the very existence or occurrence ever of false accusation and backbiting, let alone that such measures of swift response and guilt by accusation if not sheer innuendo, will also most conveniently facilitate false accusation, malicious or just howsoever mistaken, misguided or utterly lunatic. So, how feasible can it really be to respond to legitimate and false accusation alike, as if in unspoken implicit acceptance of the suffering because false accusation as the inevitable cost for effective response in defense of howsoever any truly victimized?

    The question us begged, because precisely such distorted activism typically never troubles to delineate any protected domain of free expression including simply ordinary rudeness, let alone the rights of the accused and protection thereof. For the bad faith of self righteousness is inevitably devoid of any thirst for truth and justice. After all, the traditional bogus knight-errant's unquestioningly loyal and duty bound defense of feminine fragility, likewise makes no exception, typically mandating any abuse of power against against any putative transgressor, even mealy-mouthed and apologetic yet unrelenting, regardless of clear misunderstanding or even clearly malicious and fallacious accusation or entrapment, no matter how utterly picayune to begin with. So, how does such question begging reactionary flagrantly patriarchic oppression ever successfully masquerade as militant Feminism? Indeed, there can be common grounds even between the most polar extremes. After all, even Betty Freidan, the mother of Feminism, no less even than arch Reactionary Rush Limbaugh, despised the hysterical manbashing Feminazi (or if one prefers: Fauxminist) highjackers of true legitimate authentic rugged sex-positive egalitarian Feminism.

    In the abstract they may oppose persecution against gender and orientation, yet nothing they do or say ever seems to be actually sex-positive in defense of consenting interaction and expression. After all, any hint of such may be prudishly deemed upsetting to fragile femininity and hence sexual harassment. And as the intimidating specter of manbashing looms ever larger, complaining about it only seems guilty minded and is thus greatly inhibited. Can prudish Moralistic judgmental crusades of renewed slut shaming ever be far behind?  Indeed, even though, somehow, long standing cliquish cronies, thick as thieves, remain seemingly somehow oblivious even to the most flagrant contradiction of ostensible respective ideologies between them, commonly polarizational Manichean fanaticism prevails, regarding criticism or disagreement on the part of others, even regarding strategy towards the same at least ostensibly desired results, as an obstacle and an irritation if not as enmity out right. Instead of open and lively controversy, self-righteous conspiratorial gossip and blackballing of authors and dissidents who's message meets with disapproval, from public appearance opportunities, ever rears its ugly head anew. Indeed, as ever, Political Correctness allows for the non specific catch all charge or grievance of insensitivity, especially in the most picayune over sensitivity to nuance. So you'd better not pout! Better do everything to join in and express your support like a good crony!

    And so, in the end, any pretext for cockblocking in overture to the Honor Protection Racket of sexual trade unionism, yields the same result, the bad driving out the good. In all manner of Stockholm Syndrome to whatever degree, the exploited are so often so frustratingly and perplexingly seen actually to side with their abusers even as is so well known and familiar, against police officers in violent domestic complaints, or anyone else only trying to save them, let alone as the more pedestrian, against whatever romantic rivals and excluded scapegoats and targets of bullying. Moreover, again, serial false accusers tend to be flagrant Munchausens who may well even resent ever competing with any genuinely victimized and vulnerable whom they will likely then seek to drive off. After all, bullies regard the victimized as weaklings and luzers, and the liability phobic bureaucratic mentality of proverbially covering their collective asses, will prevail, so that genuine abuse will be covered up and perpetuated, even by abuse of power and scapegoating even from the most blatantly crazy false accusations and defamation, harping upon the most trivial and picayune nuance, and other outrages of backbiting as cavalier fabricated accusations of the most monstrous predations or even, indeed, the literal supernatural. It cannot otherwise unfold and never does.

     

     

      A cockblocker is anyone either blatantly or else sly and deviously, covertly or manipulatively obstructing and undermining the progress of any two or more others howsoever warming and drawing closer together. Cockblocking, as with all action of sexual  repression, is negative rape. Cockblocking is a form of Sexual Harassment and predatory exploitation typically culminating by grooming targets of sexual exploitation into the Honor Protection Racket. Indeed, just as with rapists, cockblocking Relational Bullies may be at all acquainted or utter strangers to those whom they victimize. Cockblocking is covert relational hostility. Cockblockers are Relational Bullies who so intrusively divide and conquer their targets of exploitation and abuse.

    How can such scarcely camouflaged or rationalized manifestations of Sexual Harassment/sexual bullying as cockblocking and slut shaming or prude shaming all remain so deplorably normal and accepted? Answer, because of their long enduring actual purpose. As according to Carole Pateman, one traditional function of society, is to regulate men's access to women's bodies. Alas, typical patriarchal women may even naturally prefer any more orderly and at all negotiable exploitation, to any conceivable unregulated and more Hobbesian situation, and even rationalize looking the other way or even joining in. Even though greater self-agency for women, remains another more desirable and admirable possibility entirely in modern society. And the purpose after all, of monopolizing men's access to women's bodies, is in order to control and exploit men. Divide and conquer! And dubiously voluntary participation in any capacity or rôle, is merely the cognitively dissonant behavioral result of manipulative propaganda.

    Cockblocking much as with serial bullying in general, may begin with any number of even seemingly innocuous but obstructive dick moves or Transactionally fraudulently bumbling innocence and willfully inept blithely clumsy foolish and gauche Schlemiel or even evil clown headgames, or even Pakleds, taking sly pleasure in making a mess of things and getting away with it. Of course the "just kidding around" Existential Validation of the evil clown is plainly disingenuous, because a joke aims to bring amusement to the other, and therefore a destructive and demeaning prank at the expense of the other is no joke, but only malice. A harm ells and innocent jest amuses the other, not oneself at the expense of the other.

    To reiterate, cockblocking is more than exclusion and harassment of the target of bullying. Cockblocking is a weird and possessive prelude to sexual exploitation. A woman would do well to be suspicious of complete strangers springing out of the blue to defend their feminine "virtue." They might be pimps! Most foolish would be for the object of such dubious overture to buy in and become the mark for this scam. Bullies are not our friends! Giving way to intimidation, even by slipping away to escape, already plays into the hands of such divisive and controlling cockblocking bullies. In most cases it will be safe for the object of cockblocking overture, to ignore it all and continue uninterrupted in whatever interaction with the target of bullying. But opportunity presents itself for infiltration by pretending approval, or for blistering public mockery leading into counter gossip.

    Propinquity is key in forging new acquaintance. Cockblocking aims at propinquity hijack, devious control, the management, curtailment, and orchestration of propinquity. Blindness to or blithe acceptance of such social order is endemic to heteronomy. Such tactics maintain the illusion of freedom, even while social life is orchestrated exploitatively. But social support for autonomy facilitates the free agency open interpersonal networking facilitating ease of free association, capably, beyond the right merely in the abstract, individually, consensually, without waiting upon wider consensus or approval.

    The ugly repertoire of cockblocking typically consists in (provocation, disruption, agitation, messing things up, feigning even apologetic innocence, just kidding around, making no amends but continuing in the same vein, and various sly disruptions within whatever manipulatively plausible deniability of intentional coercion in order so as to manipulatively elicit cognitive dissonance, indeed so that even past whatever shock, mortification and element of surprise, protest will only seem paranoid and unsporting, thus thus making things the more heated and difficult. Alas hence that all to often, even the most admirable restraint of the hapless nebbish, the long suffering fall guy of the Schlemiel or evil clown, may often go unrecognized and unrewarded. Of course the "just kidding around" Existential Validation of the evil clown is plainly disingenuous, because a joke aims to bring amusement to the other, and therefore a destructive and demeaning prank at the expense of the other is no joke, but only malice.  

        •  "It’s important to keep your eye out for a friend that’s in danger of making a grave error": Statement from an insecure and blithely authoritarian controlling  Existentially Validating cockblocker

    Slut shaming extorts terrified passive bystanding from women, then taken as accent by silence, in order to permit cockblocking of prospective romantic rivals. In turn, via the engineering of sheer malignant propinquity, cockblocking socially isolates women within cliques of slut shaming cockblocking bullies and cronies.

    Cockblocking defamation, ostracism and harassment clears the field of the most benign candidates first, serving thereby the well organized and cronyistic vested interests of the most predatory exploitation instead. The bad drives out the good. Hypocrisy is by design. In any case, the worst are seldom so easily thwarted or deterred as the best.

    Cockblocking remains nothing less than negative rape
    Malignant sexually possessive coercion, manipulation and exploitation none the less.
    If it's wrong to compel others into sex, then it's wrong and hypocritical to compel them out of it.
    And downright predatory in any devious way to compel them away from one and into the arms of another!
    Herd animals at least are honest about it.

    All "fair game" tactics of covert relational hostility and cockblocking ploys as categorized under under the Persecutor-Rescuer headgame, may also include sly or just rude vulgar diversionary tactics and humiliating practical jokes that aim at distraction and shock to derail fragile and tentative connections. But, for the prepared, even just such bullying ploys may even make for ideal opportunities to turn the tables. Clique Busters stings will create the opportunity from the predictability of bullies and their misbehavior. After all, each of these well understood inadequate social roles merely echo the dysfunctional family. -Unless all such are exposed and deflated continually.

    And with the first groundwork of impunity thereby established, the cockblocking modes of bullying in relentless escalation, with shameless backbiting, ambient stealth abuse, and amoral sociopathic covert relational hostility that will only escalate, the bad ever driving out the good, in shameless exploitation and undermining of all civility. Cockblockers are not just maladjusted and hostile lone bullies. The typically well practiced and coordinated ubiquitous coercion and manipulation of prudish cockblocking in elimination clearing the field of competition from romantic rivals, invariably thwarts and excludes the most genuine and benign candidates first, ill prepared for such onslaught of petty skullduggery typically replete with the most self-serving hypocritically Moralistic defamation, witch hunts and abuse of power, leaving only any howsoever more facile, even utter tools, and most readily serving to the greatest advantage of the worst and most exploitatively social and sexual predators in every malignant collusion. And this is intolerable! Friends should look out for one another against bullying. But also, any society will be judged by hospitality and tolerance, how strangers are welcomed and protected. Therefore let there be no more credence to propaganda lies in defense of cockblocking as in any way redeeming or pro-social, any more that the vigilantism of any other covert relational hostility.

    Persistent overt harassment can only eventually desensitizes the target to all manner of overt rudeness, as shadowing and menacing fair game gaslighting confuses, bedevils and increasingly sensitizes the target to tiny and innocuous details, all leaving the target too helplessly numb and distraught under attack, and too isolated, jumpy and suspicious the rest of the time. The target of bullying even thus stalked and bedeviled, may then hypocritically even themselves be accused of stalking, even while struggling only to avoid the bullies as much as possible.

    Women, especially hot chicks, are said to be the social currency, cynically exploited and social access traded for prestige and influence, as the best social "proof". After all, what is cooler or more persuasive of social standing for any man, than to be surrounded by beautiful girls? Indeed, when even one attractive woman finds another person attractive and therefore tends to include, trust and show interest in the former, the latter's friends then all tend to agree and follow suit, even as if by osmosis! Indeed, even the new friends of an attractive person are often seen as more attractive. Social "proof" does the "heavy lifting".

    All hence, and all"White Knight" moralistic
    hypocrisy aside, no protective altruism but only all of the above is what actually motivates pimp-like self serving malignant bullies to work so diligently and systematically to isolate, manipulate and control women by slut shaming subtext beneath elicitation of cognitive dissonance and engage in such relentlessly virulent cockblocking covert relational hostility and even such scurrilous calumny against social and romantic rivals malignantly characterized and falsely accused, especially interesting but vulnerable loners and oddballs who enjoy taking social risk, even without expectation. For it is autonomy, daring and initiative that is heteronymously so envied and resented, rather than success and privilege. Even talented bullies and cronies never play fair and on their own merits. Bullies lie. They say the opposite of the truth. Bullies are so insecure of competition and controlling in relationships because anyone else will tend to treat others better. They project these fears onto me, and rightly so. By demonizing the target of bullying ostracism, the "White Knight" cockbl;ocker even pretends heroic public service. Typically, the object of the cockblocker's protection racket is intimidated and not consulted. Indeed, manipulative elicitation of cognitive dissonance typically ensues, wherein the even entirely unwilling damsel in distress, is reflexively intimidated into passivity, and then supplied with conscious rationalization. We are all vulnerable to elicitation of cognitive dissonance at one time or another.

    All freedom and opportunity entails risk, and power relations are seldom entirely equal. Therefore we must all conduct ourselves with any considerate restraint, not always reciprocated. But when injustice actually does address any real problem, however misguidedly or deceptively, we may be fooled into pulling our punches against that injustice. As long as instead of combating abuse and exploitation exactly as such, instead anything else comes under attack howsoever conceivably by association with even danger of exploitation, then via moral outrage so slyly deflected and misdirected, dishonesty, abuse and exploitation, will all thrive. It doesn't need to be anything so preposterously antisocial as any quest for so called "racial purity" or "pro-life" terrorism. After all, the Honor Protection Racket is alive and well everywhere! And tender concern for the vulnerability of the young, remains perhaps the most popular inspiration and pretext of all, for the very worst cause stalking.  

    Cockblocking bullyspeak pretzel logic

    Tautologically, unwanted advances are advances that are unwanted. The entirely reasonable and decent invited inference however, going further than literal tautology, is that unwanted advances are unwanted by the same party that is the object of said advances, in line with values of individual rights and free agency. But such need not be the case, especially not in typical bullyspeak conflation of two and three party interaction, wherein all too often said unwanted advances may in actuality only be particularly unwanted by entirely third parties with self-servingly possessive or acquisitive controlling agendas entirely of their own. Another common place assumption is that reciprocal desire predicates all manner of social interaction, short term or long term. Indeed, in the sheer controlling inhospitality of bullythink, a stranger is unwanted until attachments are forged, and not to be wanted may be tantamount to be actually some kind of an undesirable and thus fair game for bullying. Impunity for social isolation and exclusion by whatever means and tactics, thereby becomes self validating for sly and smugly Sadistic and unaccountable Relational Bullies

    Social support is well understood to be amongst the key determinants for success. But in cliquish heteronomy, the constant jockeying for social approval is the only licit avenue of outreach in seeking to forge new interpersonal connections. Making friends on one's own may often be frowned upon. And chatting up attractive romantic prospects is quite simply indiscrete and regarded as poaching. Awkwardness marks the vulnerability sought for in targeting exploitation and abuse, whist facility to elicit positive reaction only rouses jealousy. You don't buck the pecking order of what is sometimes even referred to as the social/sexual trade union! Even newbies and strangers may be expected to shun one another until properly introduced in due course of social integration. Ever skilled in the application of pressure, devious coercion and manipulation, undermining their rivals, and all towards the bullying imposition of their own expectations upon others, cliquish cronies need no actual majority and no consensus except among themselves, typically living as they generally do, in the proverbial echo chamber.

     

    The Pursuer-Rescuer headgame of cynical and exploitative cockblocking arises from the Transactional Controlling Parent. To their own ends, Patriarchal exploitative cockblockers typically steal the woman's voice by playing the White Knight. Thus it become awkward for the targeted competing lone male suitor (or: sneaky rutter) to protest, given ambiguity of possible ascent by silence on the part of the woman in contention. How cockblockers get into a woman's head: The controlling cockblocker's sly and sinisterly whispered "Is this guy bothering you?" not only plants the smug backbiting seed of hesitation and doubt, but also threatens and intimidates the woman, threatening her own safety and security. Translated out from the cognitively dissonant subtext might be more fully rendered thus: "Is this guy bothering you? After all, you'd never so much as consider consenting, because, what are you, a slut? This is for your own good, dear!" Q.E.D: The Sexual Harassment tactic of covert relational bullying that is known as cockblocking is first of all predicated upon slut shaming! Otherwise, simply harassing competing suitors might not come off so slick.

    Women need consciousness and confidence building to speak up, play out the Transactional Antithesis in order to publically shatter the bullying cockblocker's Existential Validation, and laugh off slut shaming cockblockers to send them slinking away in humiliation, by simply scorning their devious Sexual Harassment! There can be no accommodation or thought that cockblockers can ever be put to any good purpose. That's just denial.

    Malignant patriarchal slut shaming cockblockers must be relentlessly and systematically exposed, denounced and ridiculed for the evil they do. Only then will true sexual liberation, freedom, safety and tolerance ever be attained.

    The foxes are guarding the chicken coop, and always have been. Therefore, we must vigilantly block all cockblockers!
    Cockblockers can and should be continually exposed and ridiculed as the immature, possessive, controlling and pathetic slut shamers that they are.
     
    Because obviously, passive tacit endorsement for cockblocking is secured by subtext of implicit threat of slut shaming, in order then to cockblock romantic rivals, all of which is only an indirect means of possessively dominating women, intimidated in turn under the manipulative elicitation of cognitive dissonance of the possessive and controlling heteronymous reward and punishment Ulterior Transactions or: headgames and of the Honor Protection Racket, wherein lies the implication that ever to doubt or decline self-appointed vigilante chaperonage of fraudulently Existentially Validating bogus knight errantry of cock blocking, is implicitly slatternly, therefore deadly to individual reputation and personal safety.
     
    Slut shaming extorts terrified passive bystanding from women, then taken as accent by silence, in order to permit cockblocking of prospective romantic rivals. In turn, via the engineering of sheer malignant propinquity, cockblocking socially isolates and exploits individuals, especially, sexually and emotionally, and women particularly, within cliques of slut shaming cockblocking bullies and their cronies.
     
     

     

     
    shaming, disrupting
    and undermining
    attunement play
     

     

    What is seen cannot be unseen. And yet we must cherish tolerance of others and their ways, only barring cruelty. Otherwise, why so serious? Are we all turning into timid prudes and bitchy queens? We straight people have all been backsliding in sexual liberation. Prevailing and even systematic third party disapproval has long brought to bear in rendering such a chilling effect and a rush to bizarre entrapment, judgment and denigration. For any individual to be targeted, singled out, on whatever pretext willfully and systematically rebuffed and excluded from primate grooming, remains unkind, demoralizing; and only a preliminary in ever escalating stages of hostility and rejection, Relational Bullying, defamation and ostracism, exceeding individual freedom of association by deliberately undermining entirely voluntary entirely third party interaction.

     

    Playfulness reduces stress and brightens the mood. A feature of play is the self regulation of arousal and stimulation via individual control of the play situation, that bullying annihilates. Play is active pleasurable engagement that opens connection and attachment, learning and growth. Playfulness and fun are attractive and disarming, signaling good will and flexibility. As Eve Tushnet expounds in Eros and Education, Eros is deep reciprocal engagement bridging into alien difference. In the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” And the very first fragile spark of that complicity may indeed often fly at first sight! Important spontaneous and intrinsically motivated playful genuine non verbal rapport includes simple flirtation and joy of adult attunement play, a kind of social play of body language consisting of reciprocal "bed room eyes," sustained eye contact on both part, radiant smiles, momentary immediate connection, attachment, shared laughter, fun and social "grooming" honestly eliciting values of any permissive sense of safety, imprinting trust and inclusion, even reciprocal comfort template learning motivated from the Natural Child Transactional ego state.
    But the moment is tenuous and fragile, irresistible prey for the villainous cockblocking predators, amoral romantic rivals or shifty-eyed self-serving hypocritically possessive and controlling jealous Moralistic prudes. The "White knight" or even Schlemiel or "evil clown" facades rationalizes the toxic social environments their signature chronic abuse engenders, steadily eroding all capacity for authenticity and play.

    Psychological visibility, nuance and Emotional Intelligence: unlocking emotional attunement                     

     
    "Desire intrigues us, stirs the soul. We love stories about desire--tales of love, sex, wanderlust, haunting nostalgia, boundless ambition, and tragic loss. Many of the great secular thinkers of our time have made this fire, this force that so haunts us, the centerpiece of their thinking." observes Ronald Rolheiser in 'The Holy Longing.' "Pleasure is terrifying because it breaks down the boundaries between people. Embracing passion means living with fear."  writes Erica Jong in: 'The Zipless Fantasy'. -fear and cognitive dissonance readily exploited by villainous cockblocking predators, romantic rivals or self-serving hypocritically possessive and controlling jealous Moralistic prudes. -fear and cognitive dissonance readily exploited by villainous cockblocking predators, romantic rivals or self-serving hypocritically possessive and controlling jealous Moralistic prudes.
     
    Yes, playful fun and silliness make for such a wonderful outlet in order to break the ice, socially. So why are they so hard to come by? For one thing, even the best opening must lead to depth and substance of engaging meaningful fulfillment of human interaction. Another major problem is that anything to cultivate any type of vulnerability whatsoever, inevitably draws crackdown by cockblocking slut shaming prudes and bullies. Therefore, an entire culture is necessary in order to staunchly defend all such liberties, so that bullies won't find traction. Even in the very near future, optimal social integration may also best be fostered by highly advanced automated Sociometry. However, in the here and now, the avocation of engineering such proposed intentional cultures is a part of CliqueBusters.

    A focused, engaged state of open vulnerability is emotionally unguarded also of personal space and boundaries of civility. And bullies, so heteronymously lacking inner boundaries of autonomy, treat the individual spatial and emotional comfort boundaries of others with such flagrant contempt. For bullies, then, all that is genuine and vulnerable is both an unforgivable affront and an irresistibly delicious opportunity for abuse that they expect to get away with. When inhibition is lowered in what seems a secure and convivial social environment, bringing out all that is genuine via elicitation of the Positive Transference and feelings of acceptance, that tempts unguarded vulnerability, thereby producing a prime target rich environment for bullies, unless effective measures of civility are first enacted. But the solution may even be found within the very problem: Indeed, with covert surveillance, this very danger of unguarded vulnerability, can become the bait, ideal for a CliqueBusters sting operation in order to turn the tables.

    What bullies, as heteronymous agents of alienation, most revile is neither awkward ineptitude nor enviable grace, but spontaneity of natural interaction. To quote George Santayana: “One's friends are that part of the human race with which one can be human.” indeed, in the words of James Dickey: “The true feeling of sex is that of a deep intimacy, but above all of a deep complicity.” And the very first fragile spark of that complicity may indeed often fly at first sight! Important spontaneous and intrinsically motivated playful genuine reciprocal spontaneity includes simple flirtation, joy and non verbal rapport or subtext of flirtatious attunement play consisting of "bed room eyes," eye contact, radiant smiles, momentary immediate connection, attachment, shared laughter, fun and particularly the fun of human "primate grooming rituals" honestly eliciting values of any permissive sense of safety, imprinting trust and inclusion in such mirror neuron initiated endorphin besotted natural and utterly irrational momentary iota of even seeming shared trust, even reciprocal comfort template learning motivated from the Natural Child Transactional ego state. Cockblocking works by connivance of dystressfully slut shaming, humiliating the targets for even our smallest pleasures, under whatever elicitation of cognitive dissonance afforded by moralistic pretexts of antediluvian bogus knight errantry. And nothing is both more infuriating and tempting of such abuse to sociopathic emotionally damaged bullying self appointed gatekeepers so devoid of all empathy, than to come upon others so distracted from their surroundings, vulnerably engrossed in such momentary spontaneous engagement with one another. 

    “A definition of attunement ‘is a kinesthetic and emotional sensing of others knowing their rhythm, affect and experience by metaphorically being in their skin, and going beyond empathy to create a two-person experience of unbroken feeling connectedness by providing a reciprocal affect and/or resonating response’. (Erksine 1998). One could say it is our ability to be present to, and with, another’s expression of their experience.”

    ''The Art of Attunement' 

     

    Because what loneliness responds to best is a deep and secure sense of trust and faith in another person, a very, very deep sense of emotional intimacy. I use the word attunement in the book and I think that's a lovely word referring to the sense in which we can feel psychically and emotionally connected to another person in a sort of wordless way.

    Emily White, 'All In The Mind' interview with Natasha Mitchell

    ABC National Radio, Australia  

     

     
    The ys have it

    eye contact has always been well understood as an important element in attunement play in whatever social context. The Tantric exercise of eye gazing has even been repurposed as a variation upon speed dating. But instead of saying anything at least until comparing notes afterward, the participants stare silently into one another's eyes for two minutes, blinking as little as possible. More amusing with novelty glasses!

    The Science of Eye Contact Attraction
    B B C Why Meeting Another's Gaze is so Powerful
    • More from the Huffington Post
    • Body Language: Eyes
    • Using the "Copulatory" Gaze ("bedroom  eyes" )

    CONNECT WITH EYE CONTACTAnathema to the ever secretive slinking shame and ulterior agenda characteristic of cynical heteronomy, simple eye contact that so betrays individual desires and intentions to vulnerability and shame, by exposing first reactions and inclinations, by that token reciprocally acknowledges the other's existence before any spoken word much less action. The constitutionally protected freedom of involuntary nonverbal expression in eye contact can convey warmth, lust, humor, or the awkwardness of insecurity like a doe trapped in in a headlight, even the exchange of shocked humiliation and suffering for the most smug self righteous and Sadistic delight, and then returning the serve with the righteous anger and contempt of the abused and slandered. -All that may be so readily and shockingly shamed and defamed as: staring, threatening, menacing, yes, in our day, still: the veritable glancing blow, as it where, of the evil eyE or mind control,

    Indeed, in these times when the bar for serial false Sexual Harassment complaints under the anonymity of veritable rape shield, has been lowered to the sour note of allegedly being eyed or even so little as an errant glance, perhaps from the proverbial office water cooler, who can be prepared to protest their innocence? What possible defense can be proffered? And who keeps an up to the minute log of every their own nuance and micro-expression of nonverbal communication? The self appointed gatekeepers of popularity, so readily and blithely cultivate all paralytic hysterias amid Orwellian masses of sheeple, downcast and isolated even amid their own teeming masses. No wonder the most horrifically deformed so often love the innocence of children who, knowing no better, stare at them without compunction instead of so squeamishly averting all gaze. Therefore, who is there in this world too beautiful and precious even to be gazed upon by strangers? look me in the eye

    In some cultures, it is polite to look others in the eye during conversation, and rude to avert gaze. Whereas in other cultures just the opposite, it is polite to cock ones ear, to lend an ear, in order to listen, when addressed by another, and affront may be taken in direct gaze. Much cross cultural misunderstanding ensues, even without bullies actually seeking an excuse for hostility. They say never trust another who won't meet your gaze, unwilling to look you in the eye. Indeed, bullies tend to be shifty eyeed. When prudish bullies are in control, a woman need never endure the discomfort of men's eyes on her tits. That is because the men folk are all timidly staring down at their own feet!

     

    And some have held the Eye to be
    The instrument of lechery,
    More furtive than the Hand in low
    And vicious venery-Not so!
    Its rape is gentle, never more
    Violent than a metaphor.
     
    — Theodore Roethke

     

     

    Indeed, the delusionally cliquish and antisocial cognitively dissonant nuance vigilantes ever entrench themselves deeper into whatever fraudulent occupation of some fraudulent and chimerical moral high ground in all such escalating flagrant hostility towards whatever oddballs, scapegoats with no one to defend us, romantic competitors and any other targets of bullying and exploitation that such typically conniving sociopaths so blithely innuendo as howsoever vaguely deviant and undesirable.

    In the eyes of such picayune chronic instigators and abusers, it's always the fault of others:

    Leek what you made us do!

     

     
    Does anyone remember fun? If it's not such an imposition, let's go back to the way we used to do things: Honey, when I stare at your tits, just wave them in my face, and we'll all be that much happier! And let any such meager bawdiness serve as the lowest bar for any kind of safe space and tolerance. There is nothing so well mannered about men averting gaze, intimidated and staring down at our shoes. Indeed, why play toxic headgames, when the simplest exchange of positive strokes can be so much more uplifting? Again, never to impose. But exceeding mere individual right of free association or else free choice not to, for any individual to be singled out, targeted, singled out, on whatever pretext willfully and systematically rebuffed and excluded from primate grooming, is painful, unkind and demoralizing; and only a preliminary in ever escalating stages of hostility, Relational Bullying, defamation and ostracism, exceeding individual freedom of association by deliberately undermining entirely voluntary third party interaction. And generally, there is nothing that should be so threatening, falsely justifying such abuse, driving such a wedge, propagating such terror, unless tensions have been raised and vague paranoid threat first conjured up. And Relational Bullying exceeds rejection of anyone by anyone else. Relational Bullying means hostility and sabotage by third parties entirely, of connection or outreach between others entirely. And that is how ostracism is brought about, indeed often denying the acknowledgement even so much as of a smile or a glance.
      

    Cockblockolypse!

    Cockblockers are attachment disordered control freaks chronically actingout jealous rage from the repressed and repressive prudish Controlling Parent/Adaptive Child Transactional ego state dyad, especially in such virulent hostility, slut shaming and taboo towards perfectly normal adult attunement play, non verbal rapport or subtext.

    "We where having such a lovely time, and then quite suddenly... !" Such covert relational hostility, sabotage, abusive humiliation and psychological warfare tactics of build up to sudden, vulnerable and shattering let down in shocking Peripeteia, reversal of unguarded optimistic romantic fortunes, in self deprecating humor, is sometimes whimsically termed Cockblockolypse!

    Not long suppressed, always testing to see just how much they can get away with, the stages of hostility steadily escalate from preaggressive behavior of inroads and encroachment upon personal boundaries indifferent towards the rights of another and generation of a hostile social environment, into whatever individual or collective pattern of overt and covert hostility. Beyond the usual range of self serving abuse of power and covert relational hostility, preemptive social exclusion and sabotage, in ever emboldened mounting stages of hostility, a typically cockblocker will even go so far in sex negative Sexual Harassment as to create disruption while people are so intently talking and flirting, or blatantly and even physically disturbing other people while they are kissing. -By demands for attention or petty distractions and interruptions, by flagrant rudeness, hostility, intimidation, outrageous jealous displays, moralistic outbursts and coercion, all exploiting fear, surprise, intimidation, civilized restraint and manipulative elicitation of cognitive dissonance, even by all manner of outrageous and nasty devious pranks, ideal subject for covert videography for counterpropaganda countergossip. in order to turn the tables.

    Such Sexist bullies, themselves macho male or patriarchic female and often fauxminist, Existentially Validate themselves by damaging innuendo and defamation against romantic rivals and targets of bullying, and moralistically in pretense of altruism on behalf of the women they so cronyisticaly and possessively work to intimidate, control, isolate and exploit. Like all bullying, cockblocking mimics dysfunctional family. Indeed, in the very most pathological cases, related and unrelated cockblockers may close ranks for cooperation and co-validation, with every blessing and abuse of power under a cronyistuic milieu of utter impunity that even rationalizes, conceals and protects organized group stalking for purposes of covert relational hostility general and cockblocking in specific.

    At any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm. Cognitive dissonance even unto crimestop, is the emotionally suppressed inner conflict of denial and hypocrisy, Existential bad faith, irresponsible and often resentful decidophobia all as manifest in dialogue as: Antiprocess. Anyone manipulated into cognitive dissonance has immediately deep down already sensed the bullying dishonest malice in that somehow one knew not to dare question to closely. In the process of cognitive dissonance intimidation is instantly covered up by buying into the rationalization. In the evocation of cognitive dissonance, humiliating and threatening element of intimidating surprise is accompanied by convenient rationalization so as to instantly tempt the sheer reflex face saving denial.

    Moreover, all such sheer cynical self-serving is all too often so hypocritically rationalized and excused under the heading of socialization. -in other words: Once again, malignant controlling heteronymous consensus manipulation motivated from the Controlling Parent Transactional ego state, ever bullying all others en mass how to feel instead of even really asking them how they actually feel, individually and learning their responses in order to build rapport and growing to understand them, rather than faulting others and punitively teaching us all whatever cliquish and arbitrary collective expectations. Therefore of course, like Goldilocks' porridge, any come-ons by romantic rivals or strangers are always deemed either too hot and strong or else too tepid, and never just right and permissible as always for any of their cronies of course. -Thus isolating clique insiders for exploitation while with utter impunity excluding outsiders as fair game in a typical hostile social environment wherein, as the bullying of cockblocking escalates, the targets of conniving covert relational hostility may then even find themselves vilified just for seeming nervous, awkward and therefore howsoever haunted finding themselves disreputably cast into the rôle of desperate and socially rejected creeps and sneaky rutters, readily subject to ostracism, protractedly escalating syndromes of shunning and mobbing, ambient or stealth abuse.

     

    Pakled alert! 

    Certain calculatingly pathetic manipulative bullying Schlemiels, Pakled like, cycle in an intimidating and manipulative one-two punch, as it where, continually between lying, violently threatening temper tantrums, and then sad pathetic sympathy plays. Such are nieve and lacking in self control, but they make it work for them, manioulatively The Antithesis against the Pakled types and tactics amid the bullying circle, lies in just as persistently and continually denouncing the lying right then  on the spot, then standing up to the resultant aggressive displays and threats of violence, and then refusing the cowering sympathy plays.

    Because, with any luck, the threats are bluster, and they will cower if they cannot intimidate. Thus the bully will loose face. For if the bully does loose temper, let alone slip into actual violence, they will loose face all the more. But only so long as no one is allowed to then placate them.

    Hidden violence, however, is another matter, of which evidence must be gathered and disseminated, beyond what the society will tolerate.

    The anti-Schlemiel Transactional Antithesis is played in taking responsibility by calmly and explicitly denying the sought for absolution. And there is little point in fearing thereby to make enemies of an enemy to begin with. Therefore, in a prepared frame of mind, ensuing explosive reaction should be exploited for maximal public exposure and humiliation of the infantile bullying cockblocker employing whatever hateful Schlemiel tactics. Even amid whatever threatening tantrums, the Packed can easily be cowed. But in public, it might be worth while to simply take blow from the Packled, should such even come, in order to shame them decisively.
     
    Similarly, in Transactional Antithesis to the Persecutor-Rescuer headgame, not only openly abusive and physical aggressors but sly facile "protective" Relational Bullies and cockblockers ever engaged in the Honor Protection Racket ideally should then be subjected by the female shill (or: wing-chick) to the most blistering mock-gratitude in the comedic vulgarity of over played damsel in distress parody impressions (a la Judy Tenuda) building up to scathing size comparison of diminutive principle organs, (vacuo-cranial, non-specific cardio spasmodic and emaciated genital) while female "protective" Relational Bullies (self appointed chaperones) should also be simultaneously (counter) slut shamed and prude shamed, broadly denounced and ridiculed for smoldering repressed desperation (simultaneously crude/ desperate/ slatternly and yet inadequate/ repressive/ prudish - unfeminine genital desiccation, juiceless, devitalized and lacking in the proverbial the milk of human kindness) rather than ever reverenced or Existentially Validatd for howsoever ostensibly pro-social championing of chastity.
    In the movie 'Ladyhawke', the curse will only be lifted when that jilted and jealous malignant cockblocker, the Bishop of Aquila is thwarted and crushed by the very sight of the harried outlaw fugitive Etienne and his beloved Isabeau finally reunited with the help of their friend, the initially somewhat mousy but ever more courageous Philippe. This is apt symbolic metaphor signifying how covert relational hostility and social exclusion effectively manufacture social "proof" (coroboration) in demonstration of the target's luzer status of undesirability, and serving also as an effective obstacle the best Transactional Antithesis, being any social "proof" to the contrary, that can still nevertheless be attained in rising resistance to oppressive coercion and manipulation.
     
    Indeed, to diffuse whatever less overtly confrontational yet commonly persistent tactics of interference or diversion, the appropriate dismissal and dripping condescension. The Ulterior Transaction or headgame of Persecutor-Rescuer evokes sympathy, employs implicit sexual bribery, intimidation, peer pressure and offers impunity such as to excite Sadism. (Except, of course, for any genuine victim or against any actual threat. In such case, it will generally be ignored, and the evil doer shielded behind power and privilege.) The only effective Transactional Antithesis against the playing of the bogus, cynical or histrionic damsel in distress card, is deflating exposure accomplished by immediate sharp and knowing mockery from another woman.
     
    Additionally, self serving hypocritical "protective" Relational Bullies, whatever the relationship, if, indeed, any, must be consistently quashed as pests, never whatsoever appeased or validated as Philanthropists, leaders, or self appointed gate keepers. Comparisons to the Taliban may also be make apt and topical counter propaganda. -Those Yahoos for Mohamed protecting the fragile flower of Islamic womanhood within the walls of the Harem. Or else rape her if she dared set foot out on the streets, even to shop for groceries! 
     
    Alas even in the most advanced nations, cockblocking like peer pressure most generally, continues to attract many adherents and defenders, given whatever are extolled as legitimizing circumstances and purportedly beneficial and allegedly pro-social purpose howsoever understood as superseding individual freedom and judgment, situationally. Special cases can always be made for otherwise immoral contingencies. But as inspiration to what becomes standard operating procedure and rules of engagement in hostility, such rationalization become toxic hypocrisy. Indeed, necessity even as perceived, may often be the author of deplorable ethics, especially howsoever as an aspect of howsoever traditional manners and mores. But generally speaking, intrinsically possessive and exploitative cockblocking, either by the overt bullying or by covert relational hostility, at its most howsoever ostensibly benevolent, Moralistically infantilizes all the more, by so "protecting" women from any need of thinking, speaking or acting for oneself, indeed often remaining even unseen, and not merely unheard; all by the undermining autonomy with the most poisonously manipulative disarming and guilt paralytic implicit "it's for your own good, dear!" rationalizations for all controlling and oppressive cruelty of slut shaming.
    Moreover, such Conservative mentality often tends so readily and even unscrupulously allies with the bigotry of bullying. Indeed the passions of such Conservative mentality, are a hotbed of unwitting proxies and utter tools for covert relational hostility and ambient stealth abuse, at least unless the practice is highly nuanced. But such nuance is decidedly on the wane and unreliable except only in the defeat of transparency. Nuance, after all, is the height of Social Intelligence and Chivalrous social grace, all completely inoperant to the Manichean black and white thinking of comically over parented prudes, the self serving of hypocritical bullies, as well as the social awkwardness of so many vulnerable targets of bullying and utterly lost upon the alien culture and sensibilities of more Left leaning and progressive thought blithely trammeled underfoot in the ongoing culture wars of the Right Wing.
     
    How, then, shall the Devil cast out the Devil? How can a woman's fear wielded by one man insinuating himself truly allay the same woman's fear of another man introducing himself? How can the metaphorical foxes ever be trusted to guard the proverbial chicken coop? Such is not public service, but intimidation. And the rank self-serving vilification of rivals must be regarded with some skepticism.

    Thus female bystanders can be raised in genuine Feminist consciousness, educated by such a demonstration, that the deplorable and thinly veiled terror tactics of intimidation of unasked for slut shaming "protection", overtly traditional or pseudo-Feminist, can be trumped by complete public scorn and ridicule to destroy the credibility of bullies utterly reliant upon the
    validation of helpless damsels, and even to establish dominance over those bullies. Because bogus knight errants, lingering acquaintances or even complete strangers out of the blue! need but the most tacit approval, consent read into horrified frozen shocked silence then never disabused, of their female targets of opportunity. Control of women depends upon silencing women. And any silence will do. For at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm.
     
    Therefore, even simply walking away in disgust is not enough, because the bully, actingout motivated by jealous rage, has still thereby achieved the primary goal, even if never openly put forth, of disrupting contact and effective networking among others, even if they do not win the prize for themselves thereby. If a clique, with impunity, can effectively filter a woman's social connectivity, if such exploitation will be accepted as normal, then she becomes the better accessible and malleable to them, exclusively, by elimination.
     

    .com  

    Such terrified ambiguity as serves covert relational hostility in any sexual politics context is best avoidable when women are empowered and answerable for themselves. And nothing will embarrass the "protective" bogus knight errant covert relational hostility of cockblockers more than accruing the reverse of the desired result, should the woman even turn and defend the scapegiated primary target of bullying. After all, historically, women on the frontier have traditionally maintained a certain crucial civilizing rôle in the face of dangerous macho posturing. Or, to maximize public disgrace of the bully, to apologize, mortified, to  the target of bullying for what they have just endured, and to glare hatefully at the bullies, exuding both sexually and rejection.
     
    And then, to follow up and maximize damaging disgrace heaped upon the bullying clique as they attempt strategic withdrawal and face saving. Ongoing counterpropaganda dissemination must ensue there after. Repeat process at every opportunity.  Because, otherwise, in what will be taken by assent by "virtuous" fragile feminine silence, the presumption will be determined by whatever unchallenged social expectations that are promoted by the cliques of bullies who insidiously will proclaim knowledge and authority of excepted manners and mores, no matter how ludicrous and abhorrent in whatever larger social context. The self-serving prudish Moralistically hypocritical and comically over parented well organized and powerfully connected cliques will impose their ways on everybody else, quite by surprise. Unless opposition begins with strident feminine ridicule of all such self appointed Taliban-like protection rackets against women.  Women must begin by talking openly about depraved Moralistic Sexist intimidation, and how frightened and shameful that sort of Anti-Sex Harassment makes one feel. Not warm, safe and fuzzy at all! 
     
    To condition and manipulate even the most apathetic bystanders, unconsciously, to become increasingly uneasy in the presence of a target of bullying that they seek to ostracize, bullies will haunt their prey, subtly raising tension among others in the vicinity every time their hapless quarry is present, in order thereby to cultivate a hostile social environment. The process may escalate first to devious but ever more blatant shadowing and menacing fair game gaslighting, from more subtle cues, instigation and shunning, even to such overt hostility as making faces at the target of such harassment, so that others will not see, while mounting continual surveillance and organized gang stalking insinuating itself and becoming increasingly community based. This a devious way of intimidating others while blaming the target of bullying and compiling a fraudulent "record" in poison innuendo.
    Along with the usual repertoire of covert relational hostility, intimidation, emotional extortion, peer pressure, malicious gossip, backbiting, gross slander or petty victim blaming, Transactional displacement of responsibility for divisive tactics may resort to any number of basic variations upon the Persecutor-Rescuer headgame, which is a three party Transaction. But but the very nature thereof three party Transaction, may be obfuscated or concealed, masquerading as two party Transaction. This is accomplished by obscuring the truth that the complainant and the purported victim in the complaint, are not the same person or do not actually automatically share the same agenda. For example, as when a jealous suitor fending off a rival, without consultation speaks in the name of that other person, often actually quite unawares, whom they strive to chattelize, isolate, possess, control and dominate, all typically under the guise of knight errantry, protection and service. -It's all for your own good, dear!
     
    Or else Transactional displacement of responsibility in typically hypocritical mealy-mouthed bullyspeak may masquerade a two party transaction as three party transaction, as when a wrong doer strives to pass blame to anyone else, a scapegoat, patsy or even entirely invented and nonexistent personage, or when abuse of power is rationalized by  blithe hysteria as concession to the purported sensibilities of some unseen third party: I'm no prude myself, if it where up to me, I would never trouble you good people. But those others off stage are scandalized and grumbling, and we must therefore consider appearances of impropriety and whatever taboo fraternization! Please understand. -Thus is the shameful and threatening element of intimidating surprise manipulatively employed in the elicirarion of cognitive dissonance.

    While there are, undeniably, those out and out nasty bitches, female bullies who just thrive on being the center of strife with no accountability, not to mention those perennial victims, clueless over aged silly little girls, suckers desperately insecure and eager for the first or any false sense of security they can find (only to then face exploitation and rejection in cruel practical jokes and viciously malign gossip), many more average men and women, on the contrary, tend to be badly intimidated by self appointed chaperones and their disruptive ambushes of masculine conflict, especially unasked self serving hypocritical bogus knight errant "protectiveness", out of the blue even by complete strangers. Or just caught by complete surprise!

    Worse, should she erroneously judge the target of disruptive bullying, mistaking the vulgar bullies as the company that he'd ever keep by preference or by any free choice whatsoever! Ordinary people are often simply too civilized for the needed quick decisive response to such shocking conduct. And any silence will be taken as assent, without any follow-up consultation later on. 

    After all, any potential target of bullying intimidation exhibits social constraint or responsibility, never mind intimidation outright, and the bully quickly realizes that he or she can safely maneuver the situations to the very brink of disgrace. Counting on the integrity of the victim's constraints to keep them both from tumbling over, the bully stands on the crumbling edges of socially acceptable behavior, agitating and pressing the ultimate target of bullying either to misstep and cross the line or else to effectively submit to intimidation, humiliation and manipulation.

    Because all such actingout and worse, presents a thinly veiled perpetual threat of slut shaming against a woman's reputation, unless she "cries rape" over nothing at all, or silently and irresponsibly (and with eagerly awarded impunity!) allows others to do so on her behalf, usurping her autonomy in the name of her privacy. (That is, if she is even consulted or informed. Or even actually exists! Evil gossip is seldom subject to error checking. And, again, the purported privacy of any offended party and fragile flower of femininity may be accorded priority over any rights of the accused.) An ongoing threat of instability, violence, even Sexual Harassment and assault, should women dare at any a forbidden exogamic contact what so ever. Such is the standard overture to exploitation, having demonized competition and even the very principle of free choice. 

     

     

     


    Antithesis to the Persecutor-Rescuer headgame
    :  

    We all too often fail to fully appreciate just how constricting civilization really is. Indeed, the truth is that men and women intimidate one another. Controlling bullies intimidate women with the fear of stepping out of bounds of feminine "modesty" into the looming trap of humiliation, judgmental rejection and abuse. While men are intimidated by the fear of faux pas, stumbling over the the same ill defined mythic boundary (set by women constantly changing the rules capriciously and at will) that will offend against the idiotic feminine "modesty" contrived to terrorize women in the first place. Conniving cliques of bullies exploit these terrors, this daunting social minefield, divisively and manipulatively.
     
    Once potential targets of bullying exhibit social constraint or responsibility, never mind intimidation outright, the bully quickly realizes that he or she can safely maneuver the situations to the very brink of disgrace. And this holds just as true in a triangular scenario such as the classic Persecutor-Rescuer headgame. As with bullying in general, the typical cockblocker, counting on the integrity and constraint of the frightened "benefactress" of unsolicited "rescue" no less than the direct target of bullying, constraints to keep them all from tumbling into complete chaos and disgrace, the bully stands on the crumbling edges of socially acceptable behavior, agitating and pressing the target of bullying either to misstep and cross the line or else to passively submit to manipulation and exploitation. But even at the center of the conflict on every level, with any all-important tentative connection so calculatingly disrupted, threatened and disgusted, the uncomfortably "rescued", for want of honest assertiveness, effectively becomes a social loafing apathetic bystander supplying what will be taken as feminine and modest assent by silence, even only in seeking to disengage, leaving the primary target of bullying in as fair game in the awkward position of apparent social ineptitude or public accusation of sexual misconduct. 

    Generally, the "rescued" party is suddenly caught unawares at the center of conflict, but may by such conditioning of intimidation become shamed and inhibited, and through out social life seek to come to terms and to accommodate such possessive aggression as a way of seeking to reconcile inner conflict between individual drives and expectations of society. Otherwise, she would probably prefer to socialize, flirt and ultimately strive after happiness as is natural and sensible. Alas, worldview, assertiveness, acceptance, nurture, preparedness, composure, presence of mind under fire, clarity and social skill level, available resources might not provide the object of "rescue", however reluctant, astonished or intimidated, the cultivation of insight beyond false guilt and cognitive dissonance along with perhaps, even if socially risky, any range of viable alternatives beyond paralytic passive submission not to mention subsequent heteronymous socialization  into accommodation of possessive threatening bullies and exploitative cliques, one way or another.
     
    Naturally, the would-be "rescuer" needs a scapegoat from whom to "rescue" anyone else that they struggle to possess and to control. And this may even be contrived by a devious misdirection, by whatever means, to make make one person uneasy and then one way or another frame another person for it. To put another into a squirming position of self-consciousness, so that they will seem somewhat suspicious even though entirely innocent.
     
    And this is accomplished for the bullies by means of character defamation and by mob psychology and persistent conditioned association to mindless threat response, simply by raising tension among others whenever the target is near. Also by smugly harassing the target, so that he or she will also evince strongly palpable unease that others will sense immediately. Such is typical propaganda rationalization in action, for covert relational hostility, cockblocking, even leading to all manner of ambient stealth abuse and fair game tactics as organized gang stalking that insinuates itself becoming increasingly community based.
     
    "Protectiveness", especially where there is no real threat or even little if any discomfort, initially, is a common tactic for lending possessive and controlling jealous rage the luster of moral authority, irresistibly seductive to domineering and Narcissistic bullies, much to the delight of tireless instigators. Of course, the domineering controlling self-serving hypocritically cronyistic cockblocking cliques always need continual and intensive Existential Validation to to pull it off, particularly from the women they intimidate and exploit in peer groups, relationships or family. And therefore such bullies leave themselves wide open to devastating and paralyzing public scorn and ridicule, from women, if ever, who emphatically decline to be chaperoned, particularly unasked and out of the blue. By women who reject, first of all, their intimidation, and then their bogus "protection" of psychiatrically disabling notions of "virtue", let alone the scapegoating of whatever hapless third party.

    Whereas children nowadays are taught, in case they are snatched by strangers, to struggle and scream: "this man is not my father!" by analogy, the absurd picture suggests itself, of women, should they find themselves however "rescued" unasked, by macho hostilely, domineering over protectiveness, or jealous rage and pranks, best conditioned even from childhood to blurt out something perhaps in the manner of: "this sexually harrassing cockblocking jackass is not my champion!" Or more succinctly, and in heavy sarcasm: "My Hero!" Or perhaps even Nichelle Nichols as Lt. Uhura's immortal: "Sorry, neither!" However, whereas the imperative with the menace of children being snatched is to sound a danger alarm in case of however innocuous the appearance, with women and self appointed chaperones, the problem is likewise but somewhat in the reverse, to deflate the self importance of bullies feigning a noble public service, with the most devastating ridicule possible and establish the crucial boundaries of autonomy.

    The Persecutor-Rescuer headgame greatly appeals to the typical cockblocking Relational Bully or ambient stealth abuser who demands to be perceived as caring and compassionate, even while destroying any chance for others for happiness. They may even become fool enough to believe their own lies!

    Thus, as the shill in the sting, a wake-up call for everyone, different women making public contact with a male target of bullying to arouse the chronic jealous rage of the bullies, are best bait in a Clique Busters sting. Because bullies reinforcing one another will be unable to resist trying to interfere like the villains they are, while expecting to bask in the acclaim reserved for heroes.

    However, whereas the imperative with the menace of children being snatched is to sound a danger alarm in case of however innocuous the appearance, with women and self appointed chaperones, the problem is the reverse, to deflate the self importance of bullies feigning a noble public service, with the most devastating ridicule possible and establish the crucial boundaries of self-accountable autonomy.

    The Persecutor-Rescuer headgame greatly appeals to the typical cockblocking Relational Bully or ambient stealth abuser who demands to be perceived as caring and compassionate, even while destroying any chance for others for happiness. They may even become fool enough to believe their own lies! Thus, as the shill in the sting, a wake-up call for everyone, different women making public contact with a male target of bullying to arouse the chronic jealous rage of the bullies, are best bait in a Clique Busters sting. Because bullies reinforcing one another will be unable to resist trying to interfere like the villains they are, while expecting to bask in the acclaim reserved for heroes.

    Follow up counterpropaganda must also be carried out, defending the targets of bullying, attacking the bullies, denouncing all forms of bullying, and celebrating as moral and tactical victories the Clique Busters sting operations. Such is no less than our moral obligation to the truth.

    The low guile, in particular, while offering wonderful bragging rights to embolden one's allies and encourage uprising, must always be extolled as practical demonstration of the bullies' blatant malice and it's relentless predictability as an unhealthy compulsion that calls for open-eyed curtailment, and how a higher public standard of Civility can promote change for the better.

     

    scapegoating in overture to The Honor Protection Racket

    Munchausens are well known for manipulating and exploiting the sympathies of the compassionate but unwary by the ambient or stealth abuse of deliberate exaggeration and/or fabrication and/or inducement of problems, most straightforwardly onto themselves, or more circumlocuitously, at the expense of others. In particular, the misdirection of Munchausen by Proxy, where in a surrogate is deviously exploited and abused by a Munchausen types and tactics of perpetrator populating the bullying circle, in order to foment melodrama and draw attention among the kind hearted, is well known.

    In parallel, but instead among vicious uncaring bullies, in order to foment strife and put themselves at the center of the
    action while remaining passive, seductively play acting to the hilt the rôle of victim or damsel in distress for the manufactured and co-validated impunity of the most cultish and pimp-like isolating and controlling cliques, enticing serial cockblockers, those bogus knight-errants and self appointed chaperones, malicious Munchausens typically love to deviously and manipulatvely instigate and frame vulnerable, convenient and opportune hapless scapegoats as their proxies and targets of bullying doomed to face overwhelming harassment, danger and threats of violence, orchestrated provocation and abuse, sexual harassment, covert relational hostility, evil gossip and defamation. Indeed, Malignant Narcissists are often aided, abetted and facilitated by four types of people and institutions. Staged or fictitious events may also be employed in false accusations and groundless complaints, prelude to abuse of power or the recruitment of unwitting proxies and utter tools.

    All thus do the worst bullies seek one another out, if not in open Sadism and malice, then in a desiccated teasing and fraudulent courtship, a mockery of vulnerability and concern, directed only to abuse, exploit and lash out at others more alive than they whom they so fear, envy and resent.

    Amazingly, the typical unfeeling two faced
    amoral sociopath
    , bereft of empathy, moral compass, analytic reasoning, self awareness and proportion, actually relishing all taboo and hypocrisy, is irresistibly drawn to the forefront in just such witch hunts in part, actually out of a desperation for missing values, involvement and meaning. And victimization may even be their way of reaching out. But it can only work at all on the most weak and cynical of targets, as when co-exploitative bullies chronically back-stab one another or in the worst manipulation, isolation and domination.

    It is a common tactic of evil gossip to disseminate hate speech in the hopes, eventually, that such messages will eventually reach, Existentially Validate and encourage someone at all who is sufficiently mentally imbalanced to act upon it, destructively, one way or another, even to the extent if not of overt physical violence then even the most orchestrated harassment against the target of precisely such hate speech dissemination. And for bullies to network thereby, deviously, emboldened by numbers.

    From this it may proceed that certain forms of mockery and demonization may cross the line not only into provocation and harassment, but frightening veiled threat, not only of ostracism
    but then followed by all manner of abuse and even menace to life and limb, to sly open invitation to harm the target of bullying such that is no less criminal in principle than actually putting out some sort of a contract on somebody, the payment in such case being the bribe of impunity and approval.

    The above assertions are not Paranoid. Indeed, indeed this sort of thing happens every day unless actively deterred within the culture. Short of that, the bad simply drives out the good in short order.

    We need a higher standard. We need values of Civility!

    Picayune sexual innuendo also plays a particularly destructive
    rôle, evoking vague taboo and bogus threat to society, and thence most virulent impunity.

    Isolation tactics of course always also include covert relational hostility. And defamation also coveys not only bribery of acceptance and impunity but no less intimidation directed against others than the target of bullying, to likewise shun the target of covert relational hostility.

    The most damaging conceivable innuendo may be such as will serve to mark the target of bullying as vaguely sexual predator and somehow render the haunting and hounding said individual, into some sort of vigilante public service, making trouble and scapegoating the victim. This can involve all manner of life style or orientation bigotry, but not necessarily. Motivation need not be anything more distinct than whatever self serving jealous rage. The scapegoated target of bullying, made pariah, will be hated the more in success than failure, an unwanted pest with every rebuff, dehumanized the more in solitary retreat, but a worse monster with every encouraging contact that must be invasively "rescued," in actuality, simply peer pressured, bullied, even threatened and penalized away from the target of such ostracism. And all of their own good, supposedly! Such the divisive Honor Protection Racket, since time immemorial. A massive and malignant pretension ripe for Clique Busting.

     
     
    The Honor Protection Racket
    The foxes are guarding the hen house, and always have been.
    Therefore, let us vigilantly block all cockblockers!
    Cockblockers can and should be continually exposed and ridiculed as the immature, possessive, controlling and pathetic slut shamers that they are.
     
    Because obviously, cockblocling romantic rivals, is only an indirect means of possessively grooming and dominating women, intimidated in turn under the devious  cognitive dissonance of the possessive and controlling heteronymous reward and punishment Ulterior Transactions or: headgames and of the Honor Protection Racket, wherein lies the implication that ever to doubt or decline self-appointed vigilante chaperonage of fraudulently Existentially Validating bogus knight errantry of cock blocking, is implicitly slatternly, therefore deadly to individual reputation and personal safety.

    Clique Busters is conceived of as intervention of empowerment against self serving controlling bullies, agitation towards a society of freedom and dignity, safe from shame and intimidation. And the Honor Protection Racket is just such a ubiquitous and neglected and destructive social hypocrisy needing urgent remedy.

    A racket is any dishonest scheme or ongoing transaction, all not as it contrives to present itself and as tacitly accepted or endured by the majority, but deception, coercion and manipulation conducted for the benefit of the few at the expense of the many. A protection racket typically fabricates a threat of violence, and then markets a solution in the purchase of whatever sort of security services. But such are a thin pretext for simple extortion and domination. Similarly, the Honor Protection Racket creates a threat to the reputation and security of women, and similarly proffers a mythology instructive of a solution, am approved code of conduct and social integration, likewise extortion of submission restrictive of lifestyle and social connection.

    “A friend means well, even when he hurts you. But when an enemy puts his hand round your shoulder - watch out!”  — Proverbs 27:6

    The ambient or stealth abuse of hostility among men towards women represents but also deflects a palpable threat of violence against women. And this makes for an inherently dramatic and perversely absorbing  good news / bad news situation for women feeling trapped. Bad news in the danger, good news in that it may be appeased, averited, especially, if redirected, especially into the mimesis of bullying headgames and thus Existentially Validated. And that is all that may be needed for various degrees of Stockholm Syndrome behavioral conditioning of damsels in distress into the very worst Persecutor-Rescuer headgames, especially from early on in life. 

    Denotatively, the very term "sex object" is only supposed to mean, whatever target, focus, motivated goals ever put forth or not, objective, of sexual attraction and desire for gratification, or in a word, sheer allure. But, as to so being to the exclusion of anything else, that is by no means implicit or necessary inference. Indeed, objectification in terms or sense of helpless brainless passivity, is another matter entirely, and an unfortunate connotation, the true applicability thereof happenstancially pursuant to whatever courtship selection process, decision making, filters, just who else involves themselves, invited or not, and in precisely what capacity.

    The problem, yet again, is one of society, frequently with it's own agenda, as interpersonal intermediary, giving rise, once again, to alienation
    , normlessness and anomie, enabled from frequently misguided and misplaced questing for any sense of security. The ugly truth is that real safety depends upon control and regulation of one's social environment rather than being incessantly controlled. Extortion is relatively straight forward. Intimidating threat, implicit or explicit, is applied to compel compliance. But a protection racket may turn upon more devious modes of ambient or stealth abuse: A threatening problem simply appears, and, presently, with the needed coaxing, so does a particular singular and validated solution. But, as it may come to pass, said solution will typically demand whatever crucial and exacting requirements in it's implementation. And since the trouble makers ( even if not any scapegoat) and the bogus problem solvers are one and the same, in typically manipulative exploitation of the typical wishful thinking in whatever degrees of Stockholm Syndrome, compliance is extorted under pretence of any sort of legitimate transaction. -Or even as if it where a great favor, guidance, protection from oneself, lest arise the displeasure of others, rescue from looming faux pas, not to mention, whatever emotional risk life may ever present.

    Indeed, it may easily seem preferable to be regarded, treated and conditioned as a lifelong helpless witless milquetoast than the alternative, to be scapegoated, slut shamed and exploited. Any peer pressure seeking to regulate entirely consensual networking of sexual conduct, is instinctively yet correctly recognized for what it really is biologically, deep down at the primordial level, an implicit violent rape-threat. But, remember, it's all for your own good, dear! We know what's best...

    Frightened appeasement as a knee-jerk response must then be rationalized, even unto kinky fairytale false hope, if only in order to preserve self esteem. And, subsequently, social climbing in the face of conditionality amounts to the desperate attempt to negotiate the recovery of any shred of the dignity that thus has been stripped away by sly intimidation along with autonomy, and all without resistance. 

    Culturally, fantasies that are constructed for the resolution of such inner conflicts as those between innate desire and inhibition of conditioned shame and fear may often serve, also, to perpetuate  inherent social contradiction. A cynical exploitation of conventional wishful thinking.

     

    Critical Thinking versus bullythink

    Undisciplined Mentation

    Critical Thinking/Reasoning

    Insecure Impulse Mongering

    Guessing

    Estimation

    Reaction

    Non Epistemological preference

    Evaluation

    Self-serving

    Grouping

    Classification

    Malign equivalence, hostility, impression and reflex

    Belief

    Assumption

    Presumption

    Haphazard inference

    Logical inference

    Projection 

    Associating concepts

    Grasping principles

    Grasping for excuses to do evil

    Noting relationships

    Noting relationships among other relationships

    Stimulation, arousal, then actingout

    Unexamined cognitive memetic habit

    Hypothesis

    Confabulation and hearsay 

    Offering opinions without reasons

    Offering opinions with reasons

    Emotional extortion/bribery 

    Assessment without criteria

    Evaluation with criteria

    Passing judgment under vague criteria

     

    Framing the information from the above chart into terms of Transactional Analysis: In blithe disregard of all better information and reasoning available only from a rational adult ego state similarly and woefully underdeveloped in heteronymous sheeple so easily sucked in, amoral power mad sociopathic bullies tend to initiate from a controlling parental ego state and then to resonate from childish conformism rationalizing childish destructive impulses all as indicative and reflective of the kind of abysmally deranged and loveless parenting that produces serial bullies and criminals to begin with.

    Engineers refer to "normalization of deviance" when an at all tolerable glitch, however dangerous, becomes known and routinely expected. But then, if the underlying defect is not corrected in a timely manner, complications with other factors may arise, even catastrophically. In any context, we often come to accept exactly such as we ought not, specifically, society even accommodates and coddles behaviors and expectations we ought not. 

    For example, don't you just hate jerks who never consider the position they put others into, and then resent any response coming even in sheer self defense? But that's only an extreme case of an all too common phenomenon:

    One quite naturally resents the sheer irresponsible clumsy arrogance of another driver who so dangerously veers into your lane of traffic and forces you to brake suddenly, never suspecting that perhaps they did so, and under conditions of poor visibility after all, only in order avoid a collision with a car directly in front that veered suddenly to avoid running over a stray dog or cat!

    So, is whatever the true story caused or motivated, plot oriented/driven or character motivated? In plot oriented fiction, characters acted upon are forced to react to situation by whatever there is at stake, Deterministically. But in character oriented drama, characters in struggle advance the plot by conduct determined no less, but according to each their own natures of character.

    Life can only be lived forwards, but only understood or recognized in hindsight. Indeed, do we consider our options and consciously take action, or do our actions simply come upon us as we react to situation, and only then rationalize afterward? People often make their most important decisions with their heart but only then rationalize intellectually. Hence, Problem Solving and Justification are reciprocal functions, and one must be shaped to rationalize the other, with integrity or else into hypocrisy.

    The Fundamental Attribution Error (also known as correspondence bias or overattribution effect) alludes to how in seeking to understand and explain the behavior of others, one often makes the particularly human mistake of exaggerating people’s responsibility for their circumstances while underestimating the contribution of situational factors, of tending to attribute too much to character and disposition of others doing what they always do simply because of who and how they are, while attributing far too little simply to responsiveness to situation and context. Whereas, in accounting for one's own behavior, the tendency is exactly the reverse, explaining away behavior situationally rather than confronting character. Particularly, we often attribute our successes to talent and ability, but our failures to circumstance!

    Excuses and justifications enjoy the awkward position of being ‘universally condemned while being universally used’ (Schlenker, Pontari, & Christopher, 2001, p. 15). Central to the new notion of criminal thinking or the criminal personality is that, ‘Criminals do not think like law-abiding prosocial people’ (Sharp, 2000, p. 2). Yet, the psychological literature on excuse making is clear that taking full responsibility for every personal failing does not make a person normal, it makes them extraordinary – and possibly at risk of mental illness.

    P6 Rethinking cognitive distortions  

    Given more severe Empathic Failure however, underestimation of situational factors often engendering Fundamental Attribution Error (also known as correspondence bias or overattribution effect) may then go further to motivate in turn, such defamatory rationalizations for harassment as the Hostile Attribution Bias typical of the Reactive Victim types and tactics populating the bullying circle, and, as a generality by extension, Anti-Critical Bias, Ad Hominem Abusive, and dishonest peer pressuring emotional extortion against controversy expressed in the perceived right never to be challenged in any views or statements whatsoever a quite frankly loony hyper-fragile imperative of personal comfort.

    The Reactive Victim's opposition to any responsible attitude of Critical Thinking, the Reactive Victim's very refusal to accept the genuine existence or very possibility and sincerity of the attitude of Critical Thinking, consists of two principle elements; first, by subjectivity unrestrained, poor self-knowledge, by the projection of their own response into whatever deed or statement itself, and second, by the Ad Hominem imputation of or appeal to motive. (That's like saying that the potential stomach ache is actually contained in the very essence of the food, and also that the chef did it on purpose. Whereas, plainly, a stomach ache is a unique reaction to the food of the organism that ate it, and though likely causally linked, nevertheless distinct from the particular substance and composition of the food itself, as are whatever intentions of the chef.)

    From the Anti-Critical Bias of the Reactive Victim arises the dysfunctional social expectations of
    taboo, peer pressure and guilt tripping emotional black mail, wherein any question may be begged, but dare not be asked, for fear of giving offence or hurting the other's feelings. After all, even bullies have feelings. And calling bullies to task is insensitive to their feelings! And exactly this is how Politically Correct demands for sensitivity are used to rationalize oppression by conniving bullies unopposed by timid silent social loafing apathetic bystanders lacking the assertiveness to be more direct and honest. After all, at any moment and under any circumstances, anyone may be pressed and cowed into hesitation and silence for fear that to speak up may reflect poorly, exercise futility, bring adverse consequences or even do harm.

    Best for the attitudes of Critical Thinking
    , is genuine interest, even amid the most heated disagreement. For there are no values without honest truthfulness, first, before even tender compassion. Sugar coating and sidestepping the issues is seldom really the caring thing to do. Let never even the most artful tact take precedent before fundamental honesty. All of these values must be cultivated, but can never be extorted. And to protect free speech in the meantime, serious criticism, no matter how harsh, must be distinct from abuse, by objective criteria of pertinence rather than irrelevant hostility, of signal to noise ratio.

    But given little distinction between potential and probability, an allegation suffices for proof positive and hearsay is taken for gospel.  If you let cliques of bullies lie to you, they will! Instead, be responsible to verify the truth independently for yourself. When past events remain shrouded in mystery, competent investigation emphasizes the illumination of motivation of the different parties: Why do they do say whatever they are? -Not so much to cast doubt on their truthfulness but to clarify the interplay between their emotions, their statements, and their actions, being after all, the fundament of unfolding revelation in true to life drama. One does well also to cultivate the most exquisite awareness of one's own bias and presumption, and to ponder the true nature of tact beyond mere sycophancy. 

     

    Deconstructing bullyspeak
    Deranged logical inconsistencies in Character Assassination as revealed by the application of fundamental Critical Thinking
    "The great enemy of clear language is insincerity.  George Orwell 'The Lion and the Unicorn' 1941

    After all, a petty peeve may often incorporate some particle of truth, but it remains picayune and urgently needs to be exposed, ridiculed and denounced as such.

    Ultimately, simply not liking someone, no matter how flimsy the reason, may be rationalization enough for no end of abuse. And such is the most brazen face of bullying, and the only answer the target of bullying is ever likely to get, even privately, beneath whatever further layers of obfuscation for public consumption to rationalize bullying.

    Closed cliques of Relational Bullies deliberately engineer obstructive barriers and desperate scarcity of social connection. Heteronomy, cult like conformity and conditioning that fosters approval seeking, thus undermines autonomous individual critical facilities. Bullyspeak functions to rationalize abuse and undermine inhibition in order to abolish accountability, encouraging feelings of superiority, fostering impunity and license to exploitation and abuse. This raises brutal authority and fosters mindless commitment thereto, all often merely as a sly pretext for cronyism.

    Bullies often Nihilistically reject concepts of objective reality and truth or honesty thereto, let alone justice and fairness, all hence of guilt or innocence from right or wrong action or conduct and responsibility thereto, in favor of propagandistic and arbitrary judgment of personal worth, effectively justifying such discrimination as an article of faith as actually codified in the notorious 'Satanic Bible' of that pretentious snob Anton Le Vay, wherein: Wrath is extolled hedonistically on the same footing as any harmless pleasure, Sophistry apologetics are advanced extolling judgmental attitude regarding the putative worthiness of others, and revenge is valued. In other words, Le Vay commands his cult followers to relish judging and taking (such utterly unearned!) revenge upon those one deems unworthy, generally because of their social standing. 

    Immoral action or conduct is such that both violates individual rights and in that process does harm. But bullies do not recognize individual rights as in any way sacrosanct, and lack empathy for the harm done in their violation. Instead, hypocritical bullies, no matter actually how self serving, often Moralistically adhere to some or other barking mad cause or ideology, for which the ends slyly justify whatever the means. Even the worst villain may have some scruples, but a Moralist only concocts any such limitations for imposition upon others.

    Bullies are Sadistic evil doers. The awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, even involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies and relentless character assassins who so often by means of all manner of harassment, exclusion and malicious gossip, deliberately cause or exacerbate all such suffering in the first place and with such utter impunity. Of course they will resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed than when they fail. The implicit premise that bullies actingout  really stand upon, as if plain and obvious, is the brazen precept that they simply have the right to lash out against anyone they don't happen to like, indeed, at any vulnerable target of opportunity, at least if they can get away with it. Gloating in smug private candor, why do they bully? Because they can! Again: impunity. Ugly passion is so often self serving as it's own justification. Indeed, ideologies of bullying such as Nazism, exuberantly extol persecution as socially healthy. Bullying seldom considers any rights or feelings of others, except to mock or dismiss them, one way or another, or even in the heights of shocking amoral depraved indifference, scapegoating and victim blaming, in even so many words, to simply condemn or disapprove the very act of even protesting or complaining about bullying, let alone fighting back, while holding al failure at effective deterrent and self defense in no less mockery and contempt. Not surprisingly, bullies are unchivalrous. Grudging respect is the best they are capable of, when kept in check by credible threat. Whereas, the greater evil doers that cowardly bullies fear, bullying cronies instinctively treat with consistently obsequious reverence.

    Along side tolerated abuse outright, the brazen Sophistry of bullyspeak ostracism is often spun to seem civilized and constructive for the sake of collective harmony and comfort. Even the manipulative pretence of reasonableness masking utter unreasonableness in any sense of the word! Indeed, the Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression are hardly the exclusive province of recognized government, but the standby of all who seek to govern without justice. And the reality of covert relational hostility, obstructing mutually consenting individuals from contact or association, also devising manipulation and intimidation, are never considered or admitted to.

    Bullyspeak is Orwellian in that it excises the very concepts that make the reality of their devious abuse sensible. They pretend that there is no such thing as bullying, and innuendo that the target of bullying is persecution delusional. The isolation and invalidation can be shattering psychologically, and undermine self expression. For among the leading causes of hurtful feelings of persecution, remains very real persecution.  

    After all:

    “Philosophers, writers, artists, even scientists, not only need encouragement and an audience, they need constant stimulation from other people. It is almost impossible to think without talking.
     
    George Orwell - Conversation with a Pacifist

    Orwellian Bullyspeak likewise also seeks to excise the very concepts by which the target of bullying can defend themselves from damaging character Assassination, and so, deep hypocrisy is only to be expected. Indeed, just what brand of contamination, what precise genus of virulent cooties exactly, do domineering controlling self-serving self-justifying cliquish bullies, cynical monopolistic sociopathic cronies only out to undermine all competition socially, in such deranged Existential Validation, so vigorously pretend to protect us all from ever so graciously? And why shouldn't autonomous individuals be perfectly well validated to disagree in their own subjective emotions regarding other people? Isn't that what is meant by real freedom to be different? Indeed, why shouldn't simply owning one's own feelings be recognized as the very height of cool? Why such constant peer pressure and covert relational hostility? If anyone is really so obviously socially inept, gauche, uncouth and uncool, then why and what need of all the heteronymous reward and punishment, the strenuous and unflagging dedicated effort at such relentless consensus manipulation, typically involved in resultant ostracism? For that matter, exactly how would even the very most strident howsoever alleged blithe ill manners actually demand and excuse every depth of malice in ostensible response and unfair advantage? Is there no petty and picayune irritation so minor as to be endured in civility for the sake of freedom and dignity? How did our ruffled feathers become so fragile and sacred? Is it worth living, instead, in craven fear of mysteriously Kafkaesque social judgment and real abuse with impunity?

    Instead, taking things in whatever spirit intended, deliberate bullying by whatever strategy or modus operandi, must be exposed as not merely immature and downright evil, but more socially damnable (so it would seem): obviously socially inept, gauche, uncouth and way, way uncool. To this end, in counterpropaganda support of all requisite guerilla social engineering towards so desirable a paradigm shift, in the following section find listed several common logical inconsistencies in Character Assassination, scapegoating, Victim Blaming rationalization and sheer intolerance, readily recognizable by any application of fundamental Critical Thinking:

    1) Defective Epistemological Methodology and Scientific Method 

    The compiling of Existentially co-Validating purported confirmation without gathering possible refutations and competing explanatory hypotheses. Self deceiving subjective Existentially co-Validation derived from shared selective thinking. One sided accounts without seeking to hear all sides at all. Hostile action with no semblance of due process. Kangaroo Court. Baiting of the righteous anger of an innocent person in order to condemn their supposed volatility.
    .
    All manifestations of denial protecting a fragile Narcissism devoid of the empathy and healthy Skepticism which normally motivates error checking essential to functional reality testing or ev 
     
    Demonization and innuendo from arms length is easy. Haunting the target of bullying, not only harassment outright, but veritably orchestrated group stalking and menacing fair game gaslighting of hostile social environments by relentless covert relational hostility, invalidation and isolation by peer pressure, are all base and malignant. Far loftier and wiser is Abraham Lincoln's famous self-instruction: "I do not like that man; therefore I shall get to know him better."
     
    2) The puerile denial that bullying is real or common or else the assertion that bullying is only a brutish and awkward individual behavior in the denial of the occurrence ever of  the all to common syndrome of "mobbing" and shunning (let alone the most devious and covert covert relational hostility and disorientation via ambient or stealth abuse and even orchestrated harassment, isolation and ostracism or even evil gossip such much at all) or, indeed, flat out denial that group dynamics of any sort, even highly skilled, are ever a factor or that society in any way ever comes into it.
     
    The assertion that cliques of any sort exist only in high school, that very little is ever at stake, and that the only problems from cliques are the feelings of rejection of pathetic approval seekers yearning for entry and acceptance, and, again, only in high school but never otherwise, elsewhere, under any other circumstance, or at any other time in life. The a'priori dismissal of any claim of persecution as Paranoid delusional, or at best, maladapted, and dismissal of any report of ubiquitous intimidation or peer pressure as fantastic and extraordinary. Of course, in truth, among the leading causes of feelings of persecution, remains actual persecution.
     
    And such is scarcely the beginning of much needed De-Myth-tification...
     
    Because, worse still, there inevitably arises the Reactionary political scapegoating mythology of the lone socially awkward yet cunning and deft predator, an hysteria cultivated and disseminated by hypocritical bullying cliques promoting fear and cultivating authoritative impunity in typical obfuscation of their own far more common and successful organized predatory tactics. After all, it is obviously far more common and advantageous for bullies and predators to socialize and organize, and for their targets to be isolated, rather than vice versa. Indeed, amoral manipulative self-serving and deceitful sociopaths are often most adept at the recruiting unwitting proxies and utter tools against any vulnerable target of bullying. Indeed, Malignant Narcissists are often aided, abetted and facilitated by four types of people and institutions. Staged or fictitious events may also be employed in false accusations and groundless complaints, prelude to abuse of power or the recruitment of unwitting proxies and utter tools.

    3) Condemnation of character or faculties of a target of bullying, for not apprehending whatever emotionally loaded grievance or fault finding held in whatever consensus against them, not intuiting and repenting upon simple faith whatever grudge expressed only behind their back and thus beyond any transparent critical scrutiny. -In Politically Correct terminology, of "insensitivity"...

    While such may, indeed, conceivably even be the failing of any individual, on one occasion or another, what defines real full blown amoral sociopathic depraved indifference to be expected of a malfeasant bully can actually be tested for by genuinely attempting to reason with the accused to build understanding. Even by hearing and considering their side, in return.

    And so, the salient question remains whether which ever person or persons in question have been afforded any opportunity to gain the information in question. Let alone make their side of whatever matter known as well. Whether any genuine attempt what so ever at fulfilling the moral obligation of communication and explanation, not to mention investigation, has actually been made at all, rather then first socially blocking communication and then shifting the responsibility of communication onto the hapless subject of innuendo and ostracism.

    In short, are allegations kept secret and vague behind the back of the individual to which they may pertain?

    Is there such outrageous victim blaming and scapegoating of the maligned or accused individual, as to actually malign them all the more for not being able to actually read the minds of others even as they actively and deliberately conceal the evil gossip from it's target? Indeed, do they explain themselves to anyone? Or simply peer pressure and shun anyone who dares question?

    In the most Sadistic appeal to evil and blatantly predatory victim blaming, exhorted in the most rapturously malicious gloating and baiting, the awkward stigma and suffering of outcast state, social isolation, unpopularity, and most especially of  resultant involuntary celibacy, is typically most roundly mocked and virulently reviled by the very serial Relational Bullies, cockblockers, and relentless character assassins ever spewing defamatory malicious gossip and slander, all who so often deliberately cause or exacerbate the very problem they so spitefully adjudge and condemn of the target of bullying. in the first place, and all with such utter impunity. And of course, far from ever any prospect of vindication, bullies will resent the target of bullying the more should nevertheless they ever succeed than when they fail. Bullies are cowards and jackals running in packs, preying upon whatever vulnerability they can find or create, not chivalrous adversaries craving the challenge of a better matched adversary in a fair fight of single combat, replete with every courtesy of fair play.

    Victim blaming and scapegoating are slyly predicated upon the Moralistic goody two-shoes yet blatantly not merely amoral but actually imoral sociopathic just world hypothesis or just-world fallacy, namely the cognitive bias or blithe assumption that, for good or evil, a person's actions always bring morally fair and fitting consequences to that person. A variant is Social Darwinism. Thus the defenselessly victimized must deserve it, and the victimizers, with impunity, must be just because they get away with it. Indeed, that all the self serving of bullying is fitting cosmic reward for vigilante angels of justice. - or of rugged evolution, take your pick...

    4) Obfuscation, exacerbation and obstruction without investigation or negotiation

    If anyone has been in any way maligned or in any way accused of anything, has mistaken identity or even imposture and identity theft been ruled out? Was the accused even anywhere near at the time of whatever central incident or in any other way involved? Have the events been even cursorily been checked?

    First of all, are individual encouraged and assisted or rather, actually divisively bullied, obstructed and misdirected in working out their own differences?

    How grave are whatever issues, really? Is there any sign that intervention of any sort is even warranted? And if so, on which side's behalf? -And against which party, if any. Indeed, what about neutral mediation? 

    Is there actually personal danger or just bitterness and squeamishness? Again, if need be, can direct mediation be offered in some safety and unbiased impartiality for all sides?

    Is there more than meets the eye? Who is complaining? Who is alleged to have been wronged and how so? Is whatever conflict and on whatever level direct or somehow triangular and even possessive? Is there a grievance or actually an intervention of some sort in play, or just jealous and controlling actingout of some sort, indeed as in the typical and ubiquitous Honor Protection Racket or at all the kind of dysfunctional family dynamics that mirrors? Perhaps the best focus for any need for intervention is better chosen first by the aware recognition of clamorous misdirection.

    And so it may be most sagacious to ask, who is complaining or accusing in any way? The same person or persons, or a different person or persons than whatever whomever allegedly injured or aggrieved party? Is whatever sort of complaint or allegation or action or behavior proceeding or propagating at the behest of any allegedly aggrieved or injured party, or entirely on initiative of a third party somehow involved or involving themselves in whatever way or for whatever reasons? Does the allegedly injured party endorse, permit or even at all know about whatever sort of complaint, actions or animus taken on their behalf, much less agree as to the events and interpretation thereof, and freely approve complaint let alone whatever sort of pursuant action at their behest; or might whatever whatever sort of complaint or allegation or action or behavior even actually have been initiated or instigated and proceed against the will of whatever whomever allegedly injured or aggrieved party, effectively stealing their voice and distorting their views? Indeed, if the latter, is this an intervention on behalf of the helpless, or actually cynical exploitation and domination of the unsuspecting?

    Heck, does whatever whomever allegedly injured or aggrieved party or putative accuser or complainant even really exist? Even that much can never be taken for granted given such impunity as accrues whenever privacy supersedes the right to face one's accuser or even know the nature of allegations or grievance of whatever sort.

    Typically, self-serving abusers of power will rationalize afterwards, once having stirred up the teapot tempest and leapt into unwise and brutal attack, all quite without warrant or due process, while more sensible folk where still mulling things over as to gleaning accurate comprehension of whatever the situation and appropriate response, if any.

    5) Moral inversion

    Warnings (such as this one) that anyone might be dangerous, even if deceptively charming in one sense or another, indeed howsoever abusive of whatever trust they curry, are internally consistent and make sense. But bullies seeking to enlist others in cowardly Sadistic harassment do not want to make their targets seem threatening enough to make others think twice about provocation, nor, especially, to give the target of bullying any credit whatsoever for the tiniest iota of charm or social aptitude of any sort, even to malign, denounce and condemn it as false or harmful.- although, sometimes as false and pretentious. Indeed, such social cowards often become uneasy with the discussion of any substantive grievance. And so, bullies, instead, generally prefer to advertise the real, alleged or manufactured awkward helplessness of their targets and with peer pressure to Appeal to Spite, actually sacrificing the ostensibly more plausible and credible lie and rendering themselves the more easily and readily recognizable to the common sense of Critical Thinking.

    As a matter of Standard Operating Procedure, Bullies actually keep their own grievances, such as they are, picayune and petty, so the bullies themselves won't look like victims and themselves be despised for it, under their own reprehensible ethos. So that they will never expose or confront how small, injured and unformed they really feel, deep down. Bullies may tend to be reluctant to overcome their own bullies. Scapegoating is safer by far. 

    Indeed, just as the targets of bullying tend to be harmless, knee-jerk habitually toadying bullies are often attracted to destructive personalities whom they so perversely revere. Within such a toxic social environment, it becomes only prudent to submissively keep out of the way and always on the safest side of even of the most trivial and picayune of conflict, in order thereby themselves never to become ensnared in protractedly escalating syndromes of shunning and mobbing covert relational hostility. Indeed, this well explains why bullies are often only the more loyal to those individuals who they find intimidating or even who have actually abused the bullies themselves. Indeed, such is well understood as the heteronymously essential authoritarian personality trait, and, typically, will be all that can accrue from such reprehensible ethos and bankrupt precepts of masculinity predicated upon the simple concealment of vulnerability rather than real values of courage or even endurance. Therefore, when there is any just cause for grievance, bullies, instead, tend to actually reward rather than to punish wrong doing. Bullying is seldom actually deserved. Naturally, self serving amoral sociopathic bullies despise weakness, but also resent strength of character. Bullies are just predatory and criminal (indeed, "a superstitious cowardly lot!"), ganging up on whomever they can find or make vulnerable. But this they must cloak in typically Moralistic Existential Validation. Not only is all manner of malicious conniving devious and surreptitious harassment concealed, excused and protected, even lionized as pro-social bush league vigilantism, but acrimonious misunderstandings are routinely fabricated and then even when whatever generally picayune offense (even nuance or micro-expression!) is avowed as unintentional, entirely and enthusiastically accepted as grounds for actingout in abuse of power against a hapless falsely accused target of bullying.

    6) Guilty desperation and escalation

    Nevertheless, later on, the bullies may truly come to feel endangered, having escalated conflict and even criminal misbehavior much too far. Because bullies simply never know when to quit. Any line that they fear to cross, they egg one another on, striving to manipulate one another into positions of liability, while seeking, themselves, to remain unaccountable. And petty bullies tend to attract successively worse amoral sociopaths to their persecutory cause, quickly getting themselves also, in far too deep, thereby deriving Masochistic satisfaction even while venting Sadism. In such case of course, bullies will still dare not explain the threat, the guilt and exposure they feel, openly or logically, but instead all the more must still make much of nothing.

    7) Kafkaesque taboo  

    In such case as above, bewilderingly tabooistic thinking often manifests as the very hallmark of Kafkaesque Bullyspeak, vague innuendo and even kangaroo court. This may accrue under such Orwellian circumstances as when protracted exaggeration and distortion have actually literally annihilated even linguistic meaning, never mind truth, defined as correspondence to reality. Typically, hapless targets of bullying thereby then find themselves implicated in indistinct and disturbing transgressions that have no name, by craven secret accusers. This may be accompanied by such Kafkaesque rationalization as that "people have to have a reason", that very strictly unmentioned secret reasons, utterly vital priorities at that, must exist. Especially as rationalized by the appeal to privacy and feminine modesty or whatever other classic two faced sacred cow as in the ever ubiquitous Honor Protection Racket.

    8) Accusation of supernatural evil!

    Adamantine resistant as ever to all reason and alive and well in the modern world and not always quaint and charming either. Allegations of witchcraft, demonic possession and zombification, with no filter for what passes for evidence, all rapidly becoming the more entrenched articles of faith as the histrionic blithely paint themselves into a corner of malign absurdity, are all nigh impossible to refute because, of course, there are no standards of refutation nor concept of error checking nor acceptable criticism whatsoever within bounds. Hence, any challenge what so ever to the hurtful question begging lunacy of superstitious hostility will only give offence the more.

    9) Nuance vigilantes: Attack upon nuance and micro-expression!

    Consider the hypocritical cat-and-mouse demands of conformity even in the tiniest of unconscious and involuntary non verbal expression, even while under pressure of the most flagrant abuse in a hostile social environment: It is amazing how bullies ever so sensitive and either toadying or vengeful to the tiniest of cues, remain nevertheless so bereft of subtlety, moderation or tolerance for ambiguity, unwilling to own their own feelings in the evaluation of all that they feel and experience. Alas that such cowardly and volatile heteronymous social anxiety as manifest in acute perception of nuance together with poor self awareness and also sans Emotional Intelligence or empathy, renders all but the narrowest range of variable peer standardized micro-expression, unintelligible and threatening even for no particular reason, raving paranoia hijacking the public agenda.

    Not just dress or style, parlance, but taking offence and making a grievance at any mannerism, inflection or most tiny minute nonverbal subtlety or subtext of body language and attunement, real or imagined, are all amongst the typical Manners Nazi's pretexts for bullying. Overreaction even if not, as often, outright exaggeration as well, by typical comically over parented and vicious nuance vigilantes often themselves in the the nasty habit of deliberate subtext of the most hostile social environment. Indeed, no one is more ill mannered than manners than perfidious Manners Nazis! Reading in every conceivable onus and even the faux fragility to accuse Sexual Harassment, even into the most ordinary involuntary mannerism and interaction, especially after doing everything to make the target palpably nervous and haunted, like name calling outright, is only linguistic slight of hand, grammatically disguising emotional expression of covert relational hostility as declarative statement, assertion, in order to avoid owning ones own feelings and self-serving motivations

    Not even necessarily even of any sort of stress, tension or "bad vibes" (incidental or as often cunningly manufactured by conniving hostile cliques of bullies convincingly haunting their targets of bullying) let alone acrimony or threat. And not necessarily even as an indication of any ill intent or character flaw, but arbitrarily declared as an often spontaneously invented and ill defined social breach entirely in and of itself, and nevertheless bearing all the authority of ancient and firmly established codes of conduct to be upheld at all cost lest civilization fall, or, hypocritically enough, as somehow unacceptable expression even of the most ordinary motives as if said where either extraordinary or even particularly malign. Escalation thence typically arrives at vague accusation of aggressive and threatening demeanor, with attempt at fraudulent substantiation conniving provocation to palpable distress, anger and even violence. Again, typically the bullies rely upon the target of bullying for restraint in order to save face, when what is most needed is for bullying to be exposed and denounced for in the least of offences, mere bad manners.

    Indeed, inevitable cultural and even individual variance and blithe unthinking misinterpretation of the most subtle and particular variations in body language and so forth is often well known by Cultural Anthropologists to be the spark of all manner of tensions. For example, cocking one head to lend an ear may be taken as derisively looking askance, whereas instead, good eye contact may also be taken amiss as hostile or forward. But it is better to, in becoming self-aware of such things, to let them pass, then to actually rationalize the manufacture of deeper acrimony still! Social intelligence must contend with ambiguity, but fairness demands that grudges should be as specific and unambiguous as possible. Bedeviling grievances to subtle for transparency clear expression ought to be exposed and held suspect.

    Even high functioning Borderline Personalities tend to suffer some degree of social isolation because of it, especially if, being highly functioning and even talented, they have adapted to isolation by building any shred of individual integrity, autonomy and sense of self out of the process of Positive Disintegrations. Otherwise, amoral sociopathic cliquish heteronomy offers even a wide range of social networking and interaction, even however talentless or emotionally and intellectually void. The protracted and tireless raging typical of the Borderline Personality that openly indulged, might result in lost face, is instead dishonestly sublimated into endless petty malignant grudge collecting and devious bullying, whereas the rampant volatile terror of any perceived threat of rejection typical of Borderline Personality, is sublimated into an heteronymously obsessive need to blend in, hence social phobia in turn displaced, projected and directed against social awkwardness and vulnerable anxiety, indeed even most minute variations in manner and behavior observed in vulnerable targets of bullying. But even the most eccentric conduct is generally harmless. Bigotry is what's dangerous.

    In truth, there is not actually any consensus neither in the interpretation nor the response to all nonverbal communication, only polysemic interpretive approximation and conjecture. Not only does miscommunication repair remain integral to  conversational adequacy, but matching for compatibility is a factor in nuanced communication, and likewise as ever remains a matter of trial and error. As the saying goes, offend no one, and thereby please no one either. Indeed, precisely the same behaviors that night entice one individual will be the more off putting to another, or even to the same person on different occasions and cultures. And that is not only inevitable, but as it should be. After all, that is our good right and individual. But each of us must respond for ourselves. No one has the tight to bully their courtship dance in exactitude upon the rest of the world to the exclusion of all diversity! All must abide in the same honest confusion, who's only redemption can ever be tolerance and proportion, with precisely the self-soothing mindful self awareness and hesitation missing in Borderline Personality.

    Aptitude with nuanced nonverbal communication, is sometimes named: covert social skill. But isn't such, rather, a function of Emotional Intelligence rather than social intelligence or social skill? Perhaps that depends upon application thereof, to what extent whatever subtext transacted be genuine, individual and autonomous, or social and disingenuously heteronymous. Other functional subtleties are the proverbial grain of salt, context, moderation, proportion and even the saving grace of social hypocrisy mitigating otherwise barbaric custom, all typically lacking in comically over parented heteronomy.

    Attack upon nuance is typically characterized and recognizable not only by sheer pettiness, but a telling lack of rationalizing detail and the uneasy peer pressure not to question no matter how obviously askew. Attack upon nuance is also motivated by a distinctly heteronymous social anxiety and the behavioral structure of conformity, to which the trial and error of social risk taking and inconsistent results, only ever wherefrom arises that greatest pearl of truth, that inestimable treasure which is genuine interpersonal understanding and relationship rather than cynical and terrified disingenuous impersonal distance and collective unit cohesion, are all so decidedly anathema.

    Just as, hypocritically enough, one way or another, even the most common and ordinary of motives can be made to seem somehow damnable, likewise, from the unformed poor self knowledge and unexamined mindset of chronically impulsive actingout jealous rage, anything at all may be deemed (however arbitrarily, irrationally and even actually quite nonsensically) intrusive in order to rationalize lashing out with impunity. Any difference at all, real or imagined, however subtle and picayune, once made issue of, can become fair game in singling out the target of bullying.

    10) Heteronymously blithe and smug and spineless apologetics of amoral Pseudo-Anthropological mechanistic description of ostracism, focusing on it's immune functionality, however grave or picayune, effectively extolling, without any distinction, it's motives or triggers as values and virtues, hence impunity without regard, responsibility or answerability for conceivable malfunction of any kind, disproportion, distortion, injustice, hostility, abuse or harm.

    A mode of unrepentant blindly deep denial and cover up that amounts to an often stunningly elaborate intellectual slight of hand misdirection and question begging. To whit, not only what must be for all intents and purposes conspiracy to harm the target of ostracism, covert relational hostility, nor the dubious validity of peer pressure consensus manipulation, the lack of consultation to air opposing views (for error checking, to gather evidence in possible refutation, or just perspective to cultivate any sense of proportion, or any such thing to at all counterbalance endless Existential co-Validation and enablement), but what amounts to manipulation and control of how others interact even amongst themselves, the forcible and divisive imposition of the bully cliques' social filters and conformity upon all other constituents in the ever expanding network or field of the unsuspecting larger affiliation or society at large. -All of these fundamental concerns of liberty and public safety blotted out by the massively convenient conceptual blind spot of an implicit and blithely dishonorable and crazy paradigm of social cues to the exclusion of perception of reality, sanity, good judgment, priority or conscience, stopping only just short of classic openly Nazi exaltation of persecution as socially redeeming.

    E.g., as if such where the most reasonable and incidental thing in the world, how whatever observed behaviors serve to curtail, without distinction, anything so alarming, taboo and monstrous as allegation (supportable or not) of sex crime, anything so picayune as bad jokes or any whatever itch to vague for the bother to specify. That ostracism, never mind however damaging or abusive, is the social mechanism which serves the function of excluding anyone irksome!

    All this entails the barbaric and uncivil implications that freedom of association and all of it's benefits in the control of experienced quality of life, even in the most trivial details, within a group setting naturally must entail all tactics of ostracism, petty defamation and covert relational hostility, and in as broad an application as possible for maximum efficiency, because, implicitly, a) the right of non association must be absolute or becomes meaningless, b) tolerance thus is somehow rendered an inexcusable liability, and therefore c) consensus here is paramount and hence no excessive imposition, loss or undue influence upon the constituent individual or larger affiliation or society at large, with no place for dissidence.

    The argument is characterized by a startlingly blithe callous depraved indifference to the rights and well being of the target of peer resentment, real or hypothetical, and a very broad range of possible explanatory reasoning without sense of proportion or responsibility for collective behavior. Quasi-Science sans values, not only moral but even cost-benefit and priorities in general otherwise. An immorally prescriptive distortion of appropriable amorally descriptive Behaviorism. A dispassionate observation distorted into a depraved recommendation.  

    More over, since these things happen (as it is often put), this sort of remorseless indifferent rationalization may pretend to be to some degree, at least, merely descriptive or even hypothetical, and not to be a defense, exactly. And so, attacking it might not accrue any sort of confession or apology, exactly. Indeed, the attitude of those who talk this way is typically and likewise wishy-washy, likely characterized by simple moral cowardice as well as unformed poor self knowledge and control and even a certain noncommittal unreliable indecisiveness in growth of character and maturity.

    After all, as any decent Primatologist will affirm unflinchingly, the brutalizing social process of exclusion entrenches the most destructive and intimidating individuals, engendering the submission of the others. The human, however, uniquely perceiving such inadequacy, is consequently subject to emotions of shame, guilt and may subsequently manifest a certain reoccurring compulsion to instead concoct brutalizingly amoral rationalizations. In the immortal words of Mark Twain:" Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to."  No wonder then, in all the nine circles of hell, Dante reserves the very hottest section of the Inferno for those who cultivate neutrality in the midst of moral crisis! 

    11) Name calling: Allegation of offenses in being rather than doing

    In other words, a bully might allege that "he/she is an asshole [noun]!", which would make a vague complaint or innuendo, an arbitrary expression of distaste, while a target of bullying might tend to offer specifics on how "he/she shits [verb] on me!" which might actually constitute honest and just cause for grievance. Name calling is only grammatical slight of hand disguising emotional expression as assertion, in order to avoid, even in the midst memetic transmission, owning ones own feelings and self-serving motivations to malicious gossip, covert relational hostility and ultimately abuse of power. That is why name calling, an emotional and antirational mainstay of propaganda and demagogic accusations of offences in being, so laden with subtext, ought to be themselves suspect, while clear specifications in complaints of doing that are neither vague, exaggerated nor picayune, even may rightly warrant consideration at all.

    In the words of George Orwell: "The great enemy of clear language is insincerity.” Indeed, as Karl Popper observes, because truth like reality, is singular, any assertion, in order to be true, must first be made clear. And this applies especially to anything accusatory and safeguarding the presumption of innocence. Nothing vague is true, and nothing intentionally vague is honest. If only name-callers could be compelled, even dragged kicking and screaming, to try out E-Prime, the subset of the English language minus the verb: "to be" that name calling so abuses. Speaking instead of events might better ground them in reality, and speaking of effects and affects might get then in better touch with their own unstable emotions! But then, they lie about all of that as well. Mealy-mouthed Political Correctness is another problem: Rather than any honest accountability for whatever ones actions in reality, actual motivation or responsibility for even the most readily foreseeable consequences; instead, shameless pandering hypocritical Political Correctness amounts to accountability only for the image of ones actions, as filtered through whatever ideological collective, peer group or clique. Name calling, the verbiage of attack upon being is not informative but simply conveys peer pressure and impunity. That is enough why such must always be suspect. Whenever bullies so clearly raise hue and cry against innocent targets bullying, against whom they have no sensible complaint, instead the alarm should be quickly sounded against the bullies themselves.

    Projection is usually thought of as a denial mechanism of figurative Solipsism often shielding hypocrisy, the psychological projection consisting in any whatever howsoever deluded perception of another person by an observer of what consist in actuality of the observers' own feelings of whatever kind or as often particularly of the observer's most painfully shameful flaws, instead in that other person howsoever perceived. But a broader conception of psychological projection is of rather than simply owning and processing one's own emotions, instead simply of rage directed against another, even effectively scapegoating, lashing and actingout, because that other person howsoever incidentally, unwittingly and inadvertently, by whatever behavior, mannerism, appearance or circumstance whatsoever, indeed even entirely via hearsay in gossip and innuendo, evokes from anyone else whatever remembered experience any from among the entire gamut of unpleasant emotion of hurt, shame or envy. Much as with magical realism, projection evinces an infantile failure of demarcation between external reality and arising experiential Phenomena, actually treating ones own emotions as a primary attribute somehow intrinsic to the target of projection.

    Indeed a "creep" or "jerk" no less than a "slut," may simply be anyone else, any vulnerable target of bullying, whether they actually have anything to feel guilty about, who seems tense and awkward, and unpleasantly reminds the observer how that feels. Allegation of offences in being encompasses not merely empty invective insult, but bigotry, witch hunts and actingout in general, sans any sort of fair due process or investigation of external reality. Bullies need little reason to despise those whom they target, and little rationalization more than unexamined hostility to bully anyone, ugly passion self serving as it's own justification. Such animosities are typically characterized and recognizable not only by sheer pettiness, but a telling lack of rationalizing detail and the uneasy peer pressure not to question or probe.

    12) Features of defamation and obfuscation typical to sexual dimensions of ostracism
     
    “with satanic joy in his face, the black haired Jewish youth lurks in wait for the unsuspecting girl whom he defiles with his blood, thus stealing her from her people.”
    — Adolph Hitler, Mein Kampf, 1925, p325
     
    On whatever pretext or squeamishness, including the most ordinary motives painted sinister or the bewildering innuendos of attack upon nuanced micro-expression, what paranoid and helpless experience can be more subtly damaging to the individual than creeping and increasing exclusion from the informalities of human "primate grooming rituals" ? The tricky problem here is preservation of individual freedom of association and personal boundaries without Existential co-Validation for hypocritical witch hunts of self serving covert relational hostility and the consensus building of ostracism. 
    For, again, beware the Honor Protection Racket, the cynical sex-negative manipulations of exploitative cockblockers actingout and putting us all on the defensive! In the preservation of tolerance, accusations of lechery, of sexual aggression or easy virtue, must also be greeted with suspicion, lust comprising an aspect of being, indeed largely characterizing, after all, the universal human condition as a whole! Indeed, is not lechery is the inalienable birth right of us all?

    Desire, requited or unrequited, much as with criticism, is nothing more than honest expression often greeted with projected hostility out of defensiveness or jealousy that may inspire bias to single out any one person so unfairly, as any sort of threatening contaminant to the gene pool, veiled in any other words. And so, even sheer bad taste, let alone actual wrong doing, needs to be more and distinct, better defined, than any self-serving hypocritical catch-all moralistic damaging and defamatory impugning of motive from which there can be no defense for any human being.

    Consider, also: pretzel logic of cockblockers

    13) Jealous rage against authenticity

    It may first be noted that, rather than any tangible benefit or advantage, often what provokes the most malign jealous rage is known to be the courage for social risk, uncertain effort or free expression.

    Accusations of fraud or fakery, where in clear and cogent sense or distinction between semblance and verity seem absent. In other words, whatever the bully envies must be fake and intrusive! "Just who does he/she think they are!"

    By whatever vague, superficial and specious comparison, more allegation of offenses in being rather than doing, and typically by extension from attack upon nuance or style, specifically comparisons to odious fraudulent types, especially Televangelists and the like, with no cogent rationalization or even particulars as to points of correspondence between the subject and the object of the comparison, never mind specific wrong doing. nevertheless, by extension of just such comparison, however specious, active hostility is then rationalized as somehow warranted in the public good.

    Typically characterized and recognizable not only by sheer pettiness and rage, but the telling lack of rationalizing detail and the uneasy peer pressure not to question or probe.

    14} Malign equivalence is a cornerstone of weasely hypocritical cockblocking bullyspeak innuendo:

    Unwanted attentions are implicitly unwanted by the object thereof, but in linguistic actuality unwanted attentions may be unwanted entirely by controlling and exploitative third party romantic rivals. Allegation of purportedly unwanted attentions often actually rest upon imputation of illicit motives, and pejorative notwithstanding, whatever supposedly illicit motives are often entirely normal and universal, but threaten privilege thereto and vested interests in whatever ongoing exploitation on the part of the third party accusers, whitewashing their own self serving and evil doing. The classic example on the part of Noam Chomsky of malign equivalence: The Nazis were Capitalists. Therefore, Naziism and Capitalism are equivalent, and all Capitalists are little better than Nazis! Another example as implicit in the ideology of cockblocking: Rapists are sexually aggressive. Therefore, all sexual advances are hostile. And we are no cockblockers, but truly selfless and pro-social "White knights!" Could the self-serving and exploitation be any more blatant?

    15) Much adieu over ruffled feathers and stubborn emotional self unawarness

    If I'm obviously so obnoxious, then why does everyone need you to keep telling them so? Why, in order to reach consensus of course! From the standpoint of the peer pressuring Relational Bully so full of malicious gossip, humanity remains ever divided into to categories: Those who already find the target of such defamation odious indeed, and those who must yet be educated.

    Again, warnings (including this one) that somebody can be in any sense deceptively charming, manipulative and thus destructive are internally consistent and make sense. Charm, after all, may be a manifestation of pleasing guile to possibly conceal danger.

    But, of course, bullies no more want to describe their targets of abuse as popular or socially adept, in any sense at all, even howsoever villainously, any more than they would want to make them seem dangerous enough to deter hostility! -even often while demonizing the target of bullying as somehow or other monstrously threatening. Thus, bullies are urgent in "warning" others of targets they portray indeed as indisputably obnoxious rather than deceivingly charming, and somehow threatening even while helpless and inept. How can the obviously obnoxious beguile and mislead, and the helplessly awkward present such clear and present danger? The contradiction is manifest, and a clear hallmark of bullyspeak, the only danger being that of sanity and tolerance that threatens the social order of abuse and intimidation. Somehow, scapegoats are always too dangerous and yet not dangerous enough. In propaganda, the persecuted are typically depicted as too dangerous to simply let be, and yet not dangerous enough to present any risk in the course of hostility against them. Such manifest contradiction ought to serve as a red flag, raising suspicion.

    Indeed, again, bullies, instead, propagandistically appealing to the lowest common denominators of ridicule, generally prefer to advertise whatever actual, alleged or manufactured awkward helplessness of their targets and with peer pressure to Appeal to Spite, actually sacrificing the ostensibly more plausible and credible lie and rendering themselves the more easily and readily recognizable to the common sense of Critical Thinking.

    As regards allegation of obnoxiousness in particular, the obvious internal inconsistency is three fold: 

    a) Peer pressure is the attack upon variance in personal taste in preferred company kept. Bullies seek to dictate uniformity in the feelings of others for one another, to control how all others feel about anything and anyone, at any given moment. But attraction and revulsion are subjective and variable, a vital question to self-knowledge and a complex matter of compatibility and circumstances. All problematical, Ontologically. A disagreeable "vibe" seems more inter-relational than objectively real and independent as an entity. b) nevertheless, such an event, being as it may be, experiential, Phenomenological, a matter of appearance and impression, remains immediate and obvious. Hence, concealed obnoxiousness (such that would ever conceivably need to be pointed out so urgently for whatever unspecified reason) is manifest oxymoron! What need, then, of gratuitously drawing attention thereto, except, at best, for consensual validation, but at worst, and with the greatest sense of false urgency, for the sake of deliberate destructive dishonest exaggeration, distortion and peer pressure in order to manufacture tension, color perception and peer pressure consensus manipulation into covert relational hostility. c) And, in any case, even the most flagrant of mere obnoxiousness, in and of itself, hardly seems actually dangerous. (Unless one greatly fears the proverbial spoilt Sabbath!) So, why the sense of urgency, except from sheer bad will or insecure jealous rage? The invective manipulative hysteria and distress, subtexted so deliciously with libidinous bribes of acceptance and so menacingly with dire threats of rejection, should never actually be mistaken for passion of truth and conviction, only the evil doer's eternal dread of exposure, pandering therefore to prevailing dread that those unpopularity cooties might just rub off by association! (Indeed loneliness has been discovered to propagate within social networks.) Destructive bullies love to make mountains out of molehills in order to excuse their own deliberate, serious and tangible perpetrations.

    Hence, on all three scores, there is no urgency whatsoever, no objectivity and yet no Phenomenal ambiguity either, little danger what so ever, and so, indeed, no "warning" is actually required at all, of calling someone "obnoxious"! That is, except from malicious purposes of peer pressured consensus manipulation into covert relational hostility and intolerant collusion. Certainly neither for safety, justice nor real public or private information. Only for sheer deception and intimidation and all the calumny that accrues. Cliquish bullies are all about manipulation, intimidation and demanding of others how to think and how to feel, uncritically and empathically void. As everyone knows, bullies employ peer pressure to dictate who is cool and who is not. Typically characterized and recognizable not only by sheer pettiness, but a telling lack of rationalizing detail and the uneasy peer pressure and even a sense of panic, not to question or probe and possibly expose the cliquish bullies, the very allegation type in question intrinsically and gracelessly fails the test of of truth, kindness and necessity, and all such malicious gossip should be discouraged by open criticism and controversy.

    Truth to tell, anyone should deem themselves fortunate if obnoxiousness and ruffled feathers are the worst trespass they shall ever need to endure or to forgive! Such a one surely has never gained perspective in confrontation with real suffering because of true villainy to reshape their callow priorities. Obnoxiousness, being variable and subjective, is too convenient a complaint to be allowed the grudge collectors, who are often truly vindictive, far worse than trivially awkward, brash and obnoxious, actually dishonest, spiteful and significantly destructive. 

    After all, even the deliberately obnoxious falls into two distinct categories, the first being strident expression which may be of value, and the second being empty pointless hostility. Not surprisingly, bullies, being cliquish, typically tend to encourage the uniformity of just such empty spite and intolerance directed against individual sheer opinionation of any genuine value. In a nutshell, it's not the bile alone, but how one channels it, that defines the content of character. And, consequently, deeper values than vapid pleasantry that uplift a trustworthy society. Especially when there is real cause for alarm, let alone when there should be none.

    As Orwell put it, liberty, if it means anything, is the freedom to tell others that which they do not want to hear. In other words, the right to flagrant insensitivity, the very catch-all and vague cardinal sin of intolerant and oppressive Political Correctness.

     

    Dealing With Manipulative People

     

    • Also, any petty peeve may incorporate some particle of truth but remains picayune and needs to be exposed, ridiculed and denounced as such. So, do whatever grudges even seem reasonable and proportionate?
    • Contra wise, do rationalizations for any hostile action in response seem fair and compelling or just distorted, mean spirited and indifferent?

     

     

    • Is the claimant employing any known and supportable rules of reason and tools of research, or have these instead been abandoned in favor of others which lead to the desired conclusion?
    • Is the full scope of supportable rules of reason and tools of research employed, or does the claimant pick and choose, selectively preferring whatever can be made to support their claim or allegation and ignoring such as may tend to refute it?

     

    • How do whatever assertions in question fit in with what we know about the world and how it works?
    • Does the claimant advance a competing hypothesis, a different explanation for whatever observed phenomena, or only attack a prior existing explanation? Because, if the claimant has also proffered a new explanation, does it account for as many phenomena as whatever known competing hypotheses?
    • Has anyone, including and especially the claimant or claimants, gone out of the way to refute their own claim so as to really test it thoroughly to counter balance any danger of bias, or has only corroboration (confirmatory evidence) been sought for and compiled? Is the latter claim testable, to stand refuted under and conceivable conditions, or is the clam merely vacuous?
    • Are whatever assertions in question supportable, especially in relation to competing hypotheses or explanations? Is the evidence offered in support of whatever claims exhaustive? Is all of the available evidence considered? In the absence of conclusive evidence by whatever measure or standard, does the preponderance of remaining valid evidence (after whatever it's merits have been evaluated and the dubious or unsupported eliminated, however loud, repeated and voluminous) still converge to the claimant's conclusion or to quite a different one instead?

     

    What plausible, fair and dignified recourse if any has however the accused? Is there any attempt at mediation or substantive direct communication, or only action behind the back of the accused and without consultation?

    Is the grudge or complaint fair, clear, explicit, proportional, substantial or credible? -Or are merely petty slights and impositions evoked? Is there foul and is there harm? Threat Assessment? Or are there only melodramatic transgressions with no name?

    Who has the power? Who exercises power? There is tremendous advantage in hypocrisy, being: the imposition of constrictive norms that diminish fitness to thrive and are difficult and costly for others to violate, but not you. Therefore, is anyone at all impartial and have they any say? Are the sides evenly matched on any sort of level playing field at all? Who is being gotten into trouble and how so? Which side is truly the intentional aggressor? Where is the sense of crisis really? Are all the proverbial cards on the metaphorical table, or are there ulterior motives and transactions in the air? Who's and what interests are actually at stake and how so? Is it the putative victim or actually any third party? Has the putative victim even been seen, ever consulted, even commiserated whatsoever, much less by any means held to account for truth and fairness? Heck, can their very existence even be confirmed?

    Who seems to be in charge? Indeed, is anyone really being gotten out of whatever sort of trouble? Who really troubles or assists whom? Is anyone really getting help, or simply being intimidated and dominated possessively? -No matter the connection or relationship, direct interaction or indirect as via gossip, social, professional, romantic, familial, or by whatever sheer presumption, actually complete strangers! (Yes, really.)

    Is whatever socially perceived or assumed privilege of relationship or broader affiliation evoked? Taboo? How so? Is the situation emotionally charged? And with what emotions? What are all the real power relationships?

    Are friends helping one another to be safe and comfortable, or are violent or merely manipulative possessive serial bullies and chronic instigators in collusion however closely or loosely, in surveillance, subterfuge and control? -Then, of course, scapegoating to rationalize...

    Holy shit! Are sane folk at all only striving not to be noticed? Because, on whatever the real terms, is being included actually any more wholesome reassuring or pleasant than being excluded? Is this truly the nurture up in arms they pretend, or merely the same sorry conditional and depraved covert relational hostility as ever?

    Will the truth out? Who needs voice, and who needs blessed silence? Who truly needs to be separated for peace, and whom brought together if only at least to compare notes at long last?

    All such must ever comprise the true and salient investigation and instigation of the CliqueBusters.

     

    Finding social context 

    The integrity of independence comes at great sacrifice for the sake for anti-bullying initiatives as much as for any other kind of undertaking. By contrast, more profitable or Public Relations anti-bullying initiatives seek to work within the system and to cooperate with whatever authorities, such as employers or school administrators, either to be more respectable, or just to find a billable patron.

    But the more serious anti-bullying initiatives also strive to remedy the ways in which the authorities can be a part of the problem. Indeed, the authorities may even be the worst of the bullies! Or, there are less formal social contexts with less clear authority or accountability. In that case, there may be no recourse except for targets of bullying everywhere to band together. And as to response, both awareness campaigns and even covert action may be indicated. Such will be the
    rôle of Clique Busters as a most militant last line of defense against bullying.

     

    Marketing:

     
    Also see: Barter Syndication. 

    And, again, Clique Busters, should also cultivate legitimacy as a public advocacy or watchdog, wielding intimidating moral suasion, not unlike the Humane Society or the Better Business Bureau.

    Also peruse my Clique Busters fanfic...
    Be seeing you...



    Existing competition and potential Promotional or Strategic Alliances:


    CaB  The Campaign against Bullying
    http://indigo.ie/~odonnllb/cabullying/

    The Work Doctor
    http://www.workdoctor.com/

    SAEBOW (South Australian Employees Bullied out of Work) Help/Information Line "Bullies Down Under":
    http://www.bulliesdownunder.com 

    Beyond Bullying
    http://cwpp.slq.qld.gov.au/BBA 

    Bully Online home page  
    http://www.successunlimited.co.uk 

    Take action against bullying
    http://www.bullybeware.com/

     
     
     
     
                           
     
          
     
    Support for Bullied  http://pub52.ezboard.com/bsupportforbullied

     

     

    .com  


     

     


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       Friday, August 30, 2002 7:03 AM                                    

    Dear Aaron,

    I have viewed your site and must say it is unique. I really enjoyed the information on bullying, I have book marked it so my girls can read it and  better understand some things.
     
    Your page was easy to navigate, very interesting so I am awarding you the Silver award and the Way Kewl award for a good site and an unique one at  that..

    Thank you for a great adventure

    Dee

     

     

    This electronic document, while serving as polemic against Obscurantism and Apologetics and to raise consciousness about the pandemic menace of bullying, the primary outreach is for anyone genuinely exasperated enough to at all seriously consider to conspire with me in this, a modest proposal in guerilla social engineering! Email me privately if it's sensitive, or post to the forum in order to engage public controversy! And not just about bullying in general, but preferably also about Clique Busters in specific, please.

     

     

    Copyright 2000-2023 by Aaron Agassi

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